Crosswalks

If quitters never win and winners never quit, what goober
came up with "Quit while you're ahead"?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of
bald men?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with little
tiny spoons and forks, so I wonder what Chinese mothers
use. Perhaps toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post
Office? What are we supposed to do ,  write to them? Why
don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so
mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what
exactly are the OTHERS here for?

STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS.

No one ever says "It's only a game" when their team is
winning.

As I said before, I never repeat myself!

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be
vague.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it
didn't zigzag?

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been
anywhere.