|
Lcoolbabe (f)
|
Hi guys. I really need help. There is this guy i started dating recently, though we jumped into the affair without getting to know ourselves better. He once told me that he lost his girlfriend through death and i didnt know the girl was too dear to him not until i confided in one of my friends that know him and he also confides in her. Well, of late, he started giving me some cold shoulders. On three ocassions, he dissapointed me and i was so mad with him. I decided to tell this my friend and she told me some reasons why he was behaving like that. The reason is(in fact) he is still obssessed by his late girlfriend. I tried to talk to him about the issue, though he said a few but he was still not sure of himself of starting a new life. What he at last told me was to please give him sometime to get himself. I said to him, u wouldnt have put me in the game in the first place because my heart is involved. Y' all know what? I regret ever knowing him- i think i said this to him. Should I give him the time to get himself or GET BUSY with my life? Pleaseeeee, i need favourable advice. Thanks all.
|
|
|
|
|
|
joyblinks (f)
|
Baby i would say u should get on with your life. if this guy really loves you, he is suppose to be happy with you. no matter what has happened in his life, even if he lost his Father. what i will advice u is that, i know u love him, but for him to tell you to give him time, "my dear" he dosen't love you. and try 2 forget about him and let him keep on morning his late Girlfriend forever.
|
|
|
|
|
|
kboy2z (m)
|
You need to get on with your life,
|
|
|
|
|
|
baby4u2 (f)
|
joylinks be easy now. babe You never did say how long his ex-girlfriend died. I guess that would play a part in us advicing you properly. assuming you answered the question i would say. If she died recently give him the break he wants and in that break if you move on thats fine. I don't think it's that easy to get over someone you love like that especially when it was death that seperated the two of you (am not giving excuses for him but reasoning). He might have thought getting into another relationship would help him get over his hurt but i guess it didnt. If the girl died a long time ago, hmm. . . , just give him space (yes) and get on with life. so many many fishes in the sea.
|
|
|
|
|
|
kiki (f)
|
welll u got 2 options here it's either u move on with ur life or u stay with him and go thro this with him i mean just put yourself in his position u gon be dsame way but when u go thro this time with him u gon later enjoy him but i'll advice u too choose what is best for you
|
|
|
|
|
|
naijacutee (f)
|
Hey girl, I totally sympathise with you but a human life is a human life. You need to give the guy a chance as you do not know under what circumstances this girl died. You don't know how she died and whether they had an argument just before she died and he's still living with the guilt. Or whether he was by her side on the hospital bed, watching her die. Don't just dismiss people that easily, there is more to life than just what you see. I think this guy needs your support to get through this time. I mean, if the girl died like 5 to 10 years ago, then I would say it's about tme he got over it. But if she went fairly recently, less than 2 years ago, then girl, please give this guy your support, if he wants to cool the relationship business with you, then at least you can still be a friend he can relate to when he's feeling troubled over these issues. Don't just dismiss him and label him as obsessed with his dead girlfriend. I think that's a bit selfish.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Busta (f)
|
well, maybe u shld give him space to reminisce enough bout his late gurlfriend.
maybe y'all did rush into the relationship, u can't blame him, he's just going through a hard and tough time.
either u stick with him, help him get over it or just call it quits, no point regreting!
|
|
|
|
|
|
BlackMamba (m)
|
If you don't leave him alone, his ex's ghost will hunt you down. Beware!! I warned you.  |
|
|
|
|
|
Latoya (f)
|
Dump him!!! u ve said and observed, he isnt sure of startin a new life and gurl i will tell u the truth, any man that is as obssessed as he is rite now will end up reckin ur life. so i will advice u call the relationship off tho you can still be best of friends and try to help him out in the situation,i perfectly understand how he feels its not easy to loose a loved one.but another relationship wont heal the wound, instead it will bring back past memories he spent with his dead girlfriend.
so beware and act smart before its too late.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lcoolbabe (f)
|
Thanx all 4 ur candid advice.  |
|
|
|
|
|
ThoniaSlim (f)
|
get on with your life and forget him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
switpea (f)
|
don't dump him yet. allow him time to get over the Girl. take a break, and be sure he's over her before u continue the relationship or he'll never get over her. the problem may be that he might NEVER forget her because it seems like he's obsessed over her. how did you even get into d relationship in the first place knowing that he's still mournig her. Good luck sha.  |
|
|
|
|
|
Seun (m)
|
The funny thing is that it might just be an excuse to get rid of you.
--- but ---
I don't think he's ever going to forgive you for disrespecting his ex.
|
|
|
|
|
|
uchetobi (f)
|
my dear no need to clingh to someone whose mind is else where, if he is not over her he'l keep comparing both of u and u'l always fall short, u'l end up getting hurt so just move on, am sure there are lots of good guys out dere to tango with without this heavy emotional burden
|
|
|
|
|
|
Scopium
|
Give him some time and if no change hit the road later or just hit the road now and don't you go back no more
|
|
|
|
|
|
ibrahiem (m)
|
darling,
move on cus u might wait forever without him giving a damn.please, it helps to help yourself.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Gbemyte (f)
|
please give d guy a break to mourn his ex girlfriend if the death is still fresh but if the girl don die tay tay just call the guy and tell him he can continue like that.And if he still behave same way just latter him side.
|
|
|
|
|
|
ugonna0071 (f)
|
The funny thing is that it might just be an excuse to get rid of you.
i love the way you hit the nail on its head at times. You have a very good point there! |
|
|
|
|
|
9star (m)
|
that is A perfect way to get rid of u. Am sure u have bin sleeping wit him. his tired of u hence use the demise of his gurlfriend to get rid of u. I have done it once to a certain chic.I got tired of and didnt knw hw to dump her i started behaving like am possessed when he cldnt bear it no more she vamosed. jst fash him and move on. Sorri ok. |
|
|
|
|
|
RichyBlacK (m)
|
I think you're a selfish &%$@#. If the situation was reversed your selfish ass would have been "can't he get it through his thick skull that I'm grieving the loss of a loved one?" Hisses loudly in utter disgust!  |
|
|
|
|
|
jkpretty (f)
|
@ Poster
Maybe there wasn't much space after his ex girlfriend died before he met u.
I'm sure he thought an affair with u will enable him get over his 'ex which he found out wasn't possible.
But the most important point is that, he doesn't love u. The truth is, he won't totally get over his 'ex until he finds someone he truly loves.
U can't make him love u, but just stay away as much as u can.
|
|
|
|
|
|
ndubest (m)
|
, if can wait
, if cannot move on
|
|
|
|
|
|
Pepeye (f)
|
Relationships are not easy route to travel, if you can't bear the brunt then turn tail and run
|
|
|
|
|
|
bulous (f)
|
If that guy is still mourning his late ex because he loved her, he never should have started another relationship. Better move on, if he loves you, he would come looking for you.
|
|
|
|
|
|
rati ken (m)
|
[font=Lucida Sans Unicode]Peeps on this land don't take time to view post dates.
Switpea take note[/font]
|
|
|
|
|
|
Pamperme
|
i really think you should let him be.
|
|
|
|
|
|
![Nairaland [Nigerian Forum] Home](http://www.nairaland.com/Themes/default/images/english/home.gif)
Author
