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steff
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MY FIANCEE IS GAY ... HELP ME
Hello all
I am happy today not for what happened to me but for the goodness of the Lord in my life for giving me the strength to move on.
I have been dating my (ex) boyfriend for over a year now, but too sad we broke up some few months to our wedding.
He came to see me where I live and after a while I noticed he had a call and so he had to go out ....luckily for me I had a call still asking me to rush down to the office for something urgent. I left him. Unexpectedly I came back 2 the hotel and guess what? I met him in bed with a fellow man like him nude in the act. I cried out and he came running and was saying "baby it’s not what you're thinking." What the hell?
When I caught him fucking a man?
My man was gay.......
To cut the story short we were to get married by February. Now he is begging me but my fear now is isn’t he gay? Like he would never be ok with my sexual stuff with him? I loved him but he messed up. I can’t imagine dating a gay man?
Would he have forgiven me if he caught me as a lesbian? Hell no he would park d marriage plans. Please help; what do I do? Should I continue getting married 2 him or let him be?
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Seun (m)
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The main problem with your relationship is not just his sexual orientation. You people are not honest with each other and you don't communicate adequately enough.
For example, he told you "this is not what you're thinking". Did you wait to hear his explanation and can you tell us?
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whiteshark (m)
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Hello steff,
Is this true or tis for the sake of gist?
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kikelomo (f)
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Yes, Steff, are you for real or are you joking. And is he Nigerian? i would be very surprised. Well that aside. if i were you, i'D just forget and move on, because that for me is one hell of an incident that i don't think i'D ever come to term with. I mean i thot it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve?  |
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kikelomo (f)
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sorry, the shock did that, i meant "come to TERMS with"...Horrific
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JWdayise (m)
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u have 2 think before u overtake,because if he is a guy i can't advise u to marry him,he will hurt u.
in another way, may be he is a guy and he needs ur help to come up.so u have to listen to what he will tell u and make ur own investigations, and then decide what to do.
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odinx10 (m)
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about the post marriage sex i think u are right.he might not have had satisfaction thts why he went over 2 he other side u shld jilt this guy
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blendz4real (m)
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Hey girl take it easy. Are you sure of what you are saying? This is some thing very rediculous a guy who has a girl friend, not just a girl friend a fiancee going out to have sex with a guy!! Some thing must be wrong some where............... |
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Scorpio (f)
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Umm, hear his side of the story first, maybe he was just carryin out an assesment on the guy  , either way if you're not satisfied with his explanation, don't go on with the wedding. |
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natasha (f)
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no one know ur man best than u do. though i'll advise u give hima a listening ear. and judge from what he says and what u saw which is real. Good luck 2 u in ur judgement.
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michelin89 (f)
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Sometimes what we see isn't what it seems.
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salako
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If you are devoted to him, then you should discuss with him the issues. Tell him how you feel and find out how he feels towards men other women and you.
Ask him if he is devoted to you. remember - to love is a choice. If he loves you he will choose to put you first before anything else. The same applies to you if you love him then you will devote yourself to him despite his flaws and try to help him control himself if that's what he wants to do.
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omogenikky (f)
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Strange tale! I don't understand. He came to see you and then he brought someone to your house or where you were staying in a hotel.
Anyway, that doesn't really matter, what matters is that you have had a God given sign to get the hell out of the relationship. Someone was probably praying for you somewhere and you have avoided what would have broken your heart if it was after marriage that you discovered this.
So my advice is : If what you saw was real, do not go ahead with the marriage.
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kelvin (m)
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MY FIANCEE IS GAY Am sorry about your findings, but you have to put every thing under control... Good for you, you found out when you did, now what?....  |
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nucca (f)
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there are bisexuals and there are many gay people who because of societies expectations get married and have kids.
what ever he is or wants is not important.
what are you and what do you want?
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Mr.Africa
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Self deleting in progress.... All Mr Africa's posts voluntarily being deleted
Apologies
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whiteshark (m)
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The tale just sounds strange thats all. If it is 4 real then please run away from that brother but if not then u need to start work @ national script writing corporation......
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CHOCHORI (m)
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Honestly this is totally absurd and disgusting. I hate indecision.
This guy should make up his mind and go for what he wants. Theres nothing like bisexual as long as marriage is concerned. Had it been you caught him with another girl I will ask u to forgive him and go ahead with your marriage plans <snip>
But for sleeping with another man, haha, please quit now before ...
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tamia (f)
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over my dead body i aint takin' him back.
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c0dec (m)
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Man whiteshark, I dey feel you. But anyway, if it's true, well I would quickly forgive a woman if I found her in bed with another woman - while everybody is still in the mood.  |
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Oracle (m)
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You caught your man with another man right?
Well itz obvious you don't want to marry a gay, so if you know the right thing do it. Unless you want to u invest in a marriage that will bring you sorrow.
Remember, marriage is a lifetime commitment. It's forever, for better or worse.
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fabian (f)
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hmmmmm, girlfriend, ask your self this question. If you had caught him in the act with another woman, would you still go ahead with the marriage plans?
The issue is not that you caught him with another man. Its the fact that you caught him at all. So ask your self- would you trust him not to continue cheating after you get married?
You have to answer that for you.
But with a man? Now that's another issue. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
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Greatpeter (m)
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I will advise you to think twice.
If you marry this man, then you are in a tight hole.
Only God will deliever you.
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Michellej (f)
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that has got to be one of the weirdest things i have heard in a long time; how dare the guy still ask you to marry him after you caught him in bed with another MAN!!!!!!............if he wanted to be with you he would not have been shagging another man would he?
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ariba (m)
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what do u love him for?,his sexuality or the REAL love u have for him??
common' shake it off,thank God u saw it,what u should do is sit him down and talk to him
understand him better,if he i s gay and u love him fine! make ways to change him,that might make ur relationship stronger
and make him cling to you forever,everything has a purpose,all things work for good.don't abandon or leave him u might be his
his last resort or only hope,meet a counsellor,and tell not your friends or relations in order not to stigmatize his life and bring
shame to both of Ukeep in touch and be in love,make a change NO MAN IS PERFECT!!
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Michellej (f)
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I am not trying to be funny, but i think the last reply is a joke!!!!!!!!!!. Fine that no man is perfect but at the same time not all men go about sleeping with other men as still want to be married. Once he has done it once, he will surely keep doing it.
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whocares
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@Michelle I am with you on this one@Ariba Are you kidding me My sister the dude is GAY, GAY, GAY. No prayer, No devotion and No discussion will make him stop being GAY. Bisexual my foot. Take off your shoes and 'pick race' fast. Love is a decision. If you love him you can be friends, but for the sake of your own sanity do not marry this guy. You have to worry every time you see him talking to any man or woman. |
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layi (m)
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I still don't believe this is real.
Man - About to get married..sleeps around with men
Woman - Caught man sleeping with another man and still asking what to do? Love is freedom not BONDAGE.
But wait o!..Methinks there some bit of optical and auditory illusions at play. Steff wetin ur oga give u drink (before u enter the hotel room)
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omogenikky (f)
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Exactly! love is freedom and not bondage. Is something keeping her with him that she hasn't told us about? Maybe an oath?
(because) without any other influence on her, she shouldn't even have to ask what to do. Rather she should do thanksgiving in church for finding out on time. If it was really true, then it was divine intervention.
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Jakumo (m)
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The probability of a gay man having contracted AIDS as a result of his lifestyle is far greater than the odds of a straight, non drug using man carrying the deadly disease. Drop that guy like a bad habit before he infects you.
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IAH (f)
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Man whiteshark, I dey feel you. But anyway, if it's true, well I would quickly forgive a woman if I found her in bed with another woman - while everybody is still in the mood.  I just saw this and nearly fell off my seat with laughter! You talking about a...a...a threesome? |
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da808cutie (f)
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this sounds a bit too tale-like but if it's tru and you're still asking what to do, then you're probably more confused than he is (no offence). But is it when your child walks in on him doing the neighbour's driver that you'D make up your mind.
@ariba, surely you didn't hear (or read) yourself. dude's gay and you want her to commit her life to "bondage"? seriously sound less gay next time
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