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Romeo4real (m)
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This is not a female bashing post - Just seeking further understanding and enlightenment.
HER STORY:
I met my boyfriend up in the bar, as planned after work. I could see he was already in an odd mood. I thought it might have been because I was a bit late, but as he didn't say anything, i didn't either. I thought we should go off somewhere more intimate so we could talk more privately.
So we went to this restaurant and he's STILL acting a bit funny and I'm trying to cheer him up when I start to wonder whether it's me or something else.
I ask him and he says "no". But you know I'm not really sure.
So, anyway, in the cab back to his house I say that I love him and he just puts his arm around me because, you know, he doesn't say it back or anything. We finally get back to his place and I'm wondering whats wrong. Maybe he is trying to dump me!
So I try to ask him about it, but he just switches the TV on. Reluctantly I say I'm going to go to sleep. Then, after about 10 minutes, he joins me and starts to touch me. We have sex, but i can sense his mind was not there as he seemed really distracted. I'm feeling used, so i told him im leaving and going back to my place.
I mean, do you think he's met someone else?
HIS STORY:
Crap day at work. Tired. Got a shag though.
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St☆rz (f)
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I don't understand, what is there to explain?
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Igwe.
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I don't understand, what is there to explain?
Your question makes sense to me  |
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Romeo4real (m)
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Maybe this illustration can help shed some light on the issue!
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~Sissy~ (f)
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we are not complicated, it's you men who make us seem/appear/feel complicated
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St☆rz (f)
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Maybe this illustration can help shed some light on the issue!
. . . and you say you're not bashing women. smh |
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Igwe.
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yes oooooo, na God makam so  , but we like them like that ~ duh!
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pc guru (m)
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Romeo as far as am concerned you don't have a point probably just created this thread so that you cud use dat pix.
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St☆rz (f)
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Romeo as far as am concerned you don't have a point probably just created this thread so that you cud use dat pix.
Precisely. I knew what he was doing. Funny how he gets mad when someone criticizes men. |
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ezinne1212 (f)
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Woman: Notices odd mood, asks 'whats wrong babe?'
Man: Just a crappy day at work.
END OF DISCUSSION, NIGHT CONTINUES---------- COMMUNICATION! No one reads minds~
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190 (m)
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wahala on our land
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Romeo4real (m)
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. . . and you say you're not bashing women. smh @Starstruck - i dont get mad when silly hysterical women bash men, rather i feel sorry for them, for their confusion and lack of logic in their arguments is so apparent Can u show me where in the post, or in the pic is there anything that is rude insulting, or derogatory to women? |
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Romeo4real (m)
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Romeo as far as am concerned you don't have a point probably just created this thread so that you cud use dat pix. Ok, and what is your point? |
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iice (f)
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LMAO!
The op is simply saying we are complicated. In the story, she's going through many things in her mind and emotionally as a reaction to the guy's mood (with jara from herself).
I think some people are complicated (men and women) but i do agree we take the cake.
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topup
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The woman in question is compensating for her boyfriends lack of communication by over-thinking things through.
We're all adults, and guys don't pretend you don't understand how your moods and behaviour can be perceived.
I know if I'm behaving differently to how I normally behave, someone could take it as me being offended with them, even if I had just had a crappy day at work.
If I sense that the person I'm with is a little cautious because of my mood, I would start a conversation, which would reveal that I'm not in the best of moods. I guess sometimes people don't want to say a thing, but that lack of talking will lead the other person to make their own conclusions.
Would you really want a girlfriend who needs you to say things before she picks it up.
e.g. would you want her never to buy you a thing unless you explicity say; "I want that tie from. ."
Wouldn't you be amazed if through knowing you in depth she bought the tie and surprised you with it?
I think the woman should have just asked the guy as soon as she detected something, but the guy probably would have just said bluntly; "I had a crap day at work." which might have not been enough for the analytical woman in question.
Lastly:
"I got a shag though"
If my husband ever said that or thought that . . man that wouldn't be a positive thing at all. .
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Ben-10
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women are too simple that we curiously misuderstand them to be too compliated.
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Romeo4real (m)
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The woman in question is compensating for her boyfriends lack of communication by over-thinking things through @Topup - Wow! She only asked him one question thru the whole drama, to which he gave a simple and truthful answer. As a man, im really trying to see his "lack of communications skiils". Its so important to try and make sense of this from a woman's viewpoint, as its the kind of stuff I, (and many men)go through. |
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Romeo4real (m)
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Would you really want a girlfriend who needs you to say things before she picks it up.
e.g. would you want her never to buy you a thing unless you explicitly say; "I want that tie from. ."
Wouldn't you be amazed if through knowing you in depth she bought the tie and surprised you with it? C'mon, you know its not that simple. A man is not a mind reader, neither is a woman. The problem is, even when you ask a woman whats wrong, she will say "nothing, if u dont know it already, then there no point in telling u". WTF!! What can a man do? Yes, you shd be sensitive and observant to you partners feelings, but communication is about being clear, precise and direct about what u are trying to say - Not sending out signs, signals and codes, that could be ignored or misinterpreted. On the tie issue, i would definitely specify what & where i want it from, as its one of those things that is so easy to get wrong. |
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ThoniaSlim (f)
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Long Yawn. . .don't you dudes think your beginning to sound redundant? 
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topup
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C'mon, you know its not that simple. A man is not a mind reader, neither is a woman.
The problem is, even when you ask a woman whats wrong, she will say "nothing, if u dont know it already, then there no point in telling u". WTF!! What can a man do?
Yes, you shd be sensitive and observant to you partners feelings, but communication is about being clear, precise and direct about what u are trying to say - Not sending out signs, signals and codes, that could be ignored or misinterpreted.
On the tie issue, i would definitely specify what & where i want it from, as its one of those things that is so easy to get wrong.
I would never say "Nothing." (and definitely not with 'smart' response afterwards) unless I didn't want to talk about the issue. If he then proceeded to move on and never ask what was wrong with me again, then I would be punching myself wishing I had just got what was on my chest. . off my chest. I am a person who likes to talk things through. . which shouldn't be a surprise to those familiar with this board  .
I agree with you, the whole "nothing" thing is silly.
It's usually used by women not when they're trying to play mind games, but when they're doing the whole;
"I'm not going to fall into the stereotype of an emotional female, I'm going to handle this problem, and not let it affect me."
They do it just to prove something, when deep inside the issue is biting at them and they want to speak about it. If you ask again, and again, it becomes difficult to withhold the info. and there's always the excuse "He really wanted to know, what was wrong, it wouldn't be fair if I ignored him."
(There are a lot of assumptions in what I've said, I know, but that's my interpretation of it).
@Topup - Wow! She only asked him one question thru the whole drama, to which he gave a simple and truthful answer. As a man, im really trying to see his "lack of communications skiils".
Its so important to try and make sense of this from a woman's viewpoint, as its the kind of stuff I, (and many men)go through.
I never said he lacked communication skills, but there was a lack of communication. We are responsible to an extent for a tiny bit of how our actions affect others, this is passive action - it was the way he didn't act.
I'm sure if he yelled at her, we would all agree she had a right to ask what was wrong or even demand an answer.
But he did the opposite, he imploded instead, his actions changed, he wasn't himself, he was probably sad, disheartened or just fed up, and she picked up on it, which is what all people men or women should do.
You should notice when your partner is acting stranger than usual. In fact I think we should know when even casual friends are acting strange, we are accountable for those around us.
I mean how many people afterwards say things like "I thought she was acting a little strange, but I didn't know that her parent's divorce would cause her to commit suicide."
Yes, it's an extreme view, but you get what I mean.
Luckily he only had a bad day at work, and if he had just said that, then I would be here siding with the guy, saying his girlfriend should have just killed her doubts right there and then, and trusted her guy.
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muyoto
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@OP because they suck
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lexylexy9
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thats hw they were designed
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C2H5OH (m)
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Lol this is not news my friend. It is a known fact. Just try to nod at whatever they have to say. I assure you it will make your life much easier.
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Secretz (f)
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Yes we are complicated, I can admit to tha. I am soo complex I can't find anybody who is good enough for me, due to my complex nature.  |
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St☆rz (f)
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@Starstruck - i dont get mad when silly hysterical women bash men, rather i feel sorry for them, for their confusion and lack of logic in their arguments is so apparent
Can u show me where in the post, or in the pic is there anything that is rude insulting, or derogatory to women?
Why would I waste my time? If you don't see it, poor you. |
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bluespice (f)
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and wats your point? |
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beingme (f)
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complicated? poster remember your mama is a woman
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oyinda. (f)
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lol. i wouldn't say women are more complicated. men are just as complicated in their thoughts just that they are brought up to hide their true emotions and feelings and not share it with others.
I mean i'd rather read her story than his story. lol
his doesn't even make a story. doesn't even count as one sentence.
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C2H5OH (m)
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Don't keep trying to figure out what a girl is thinking. You will become overanalytical, and that's only going to lead you to start sporting grey hair by the time you turn 25.
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whitelexi (m)
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Just thinking, The story line illustrates how guys think in a very straight-to-the-point manner like: he had a crappy day at work, he's tired and he just got laid! The girl has built 10 million skyscrappers in her thoughts, wondering why he's so quiet, why he doesn't say i love u back, why he was passive in bed, where his thoughts are. . . and the list just goes on and on. @Poster: If thats what u mean, then i have to agree with u.  |
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JamaicanQT (f)
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Women aren't complicated its all about taking the time understand the feelings, personality and what she is all about, SIMPLE AS THAT |
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