My Friend is "Not Really In Love With Her Husband"?

Is it possible I realise after the wedding that 1 don't really love my husband?

Hi,

I have a friend that got married to a guy she dated over a year. She just started telling me that she realises she is not really in love with her husband and when I asked her how--- she says she just realised so---

I asked a question like---what was it that really got her into the marriage in the first place if not love and quess what she said-- I needed to be with someone. I'm still wondering if its possible cause ya all know that marriage is a lifetime commitment.

Thanks mckaycee..
I will convey your advise

I don't think it has to do with money. She is okay and she is a very contented persn. She said, her husband does,t kiss her and she prefers kissing to-----. She also said, she was trying to lure him to like kissing but in vain.. like she said the guy doesn't kiss, smooch and just goes straight to the point....... (God forgive me for exposing my friend.

Sometimes, when a woman is not happy in a relationship, she suddenly wakes up with the idea that she "doesn't really love" her mate, whereas it is a relationship problem that can be solved by proper counseling.  I mean, the problem here is simply that the husband doesn't understand that he has to make the lovemaking pleasurable for his wife (and not just himself).  This is not a love issue, this is a common problem that can be solved by a an experienced counselor that the husband respects.

I am close to an elderly couple that does marriage counseling for Christians, so if your friend is interested in saving her marriage instead of looking for "love" elsewhere, you can contact me and I'll link you up.  Good luck!

When I read this post, two schools of thot immediately jumped into mind....

#1:


The corrolary to this would be if she fooled her husband into marrying her..??


#2:


Well.. If I was to make an "intelligent" (well, maybe not so intelligent...  ) guess, I'D say that both parties did not have pre-marital sex, otherwise they'D have both explored this area, and known what they were both getting into... 

On a more serious note, I guess your friend should sit down and really ask herself what exactly she saw in her husband that lead her to want to marry him.. I believe that it's not like the guy has changed.. rather, since her immediate want (or need) has been satisfied[companionship], she now looks higher on the "heirachy" of marital needs to find other factors which will give her marital satisfaction and fulfillment..

I can only say here that this underlines the importance of getting to know your future partner (spouse) very well.. the good sides and the bad sides.. I often that in some marriages, that parties tend to have second Thoughts or misgivings on their wedding day, or some times, soon after the wedding day.. she shouldn't construe this as a sign that her marriage is destined for failure.. but rather that there are areas which she is now aware of, which need to be worked on.. I believe communication is the key..

Marriage is not a contract, that can be entered into and broken (even if at some cost..)..

Marriage is a conventant.. (well.. my belief anyways.. ).. For Life.... 

She must make some adjustments. Be it known to her that it is not easy to live with the opposite sex. After the aura of wedding and honeymoon then comes monotony, which they say, kills the mind. Sometimes you feel tired seeing the same person everyday. It is natural in our daily lives.

But in the issue of marriage, she has to overcome that or else she will be caught in that ugly web even if she remarries. She has to be closer to her husband now. She can sometimes go out for diner with her husband; it’s not bad even if she is the best cook.

She should feel relaxed and make her husband the man she wants to him to be. There must be a disconnect in the chemistry between them, the woman has to fix it.

Didn't she know that before the marriage or was she forced into the marrige? i know i am not exaclty helping right now but there's some helpful comments i've  seen, hopefully, she gets helped somehow.

plssssssssssssssssssssss, what is this ? she's not in love with her husband. no problem now, what ever she was in love with that made her marry the chap, she should continue to love it abi. A lot of chics don't love their husbands now , its not new. they start by loving say his staus or money and gradually it builds up from there. So she should persevere, its for better or worse, the love will come

She better start falling in love with him. She has made the vows.

star please tell ur friend to communicate with her husy so that he knows her areas of interest
marriage is a vow that only death can effectively break so she should endure and probably go for marriage counselling:P

Marriage is a life time commitment.I'D rather u tell her to love him by force and pray to God to help her in loving him.I think going for counselling as said by seun is a nice one.She should try n do dt.God help u

True talk my sista. The tin na by force.

it is very common marring who you never that much love,because when u get to a certain age in life all u do think of is getting married (the ladies) at time family problem result to this kind of problems when your parent are stopping you from getting married to a particular person for a little  reason and that make you to fall for that next guy or lady who is much wellcome
why after some times in marriage you will find out yourself how much u do love this person.

secondly you don't know all about your partner not on-till you have leave together under marriage for some time before you could tell of who you really married and who you love much.

were she blind when she got married to him?
or she's seeing another man outisde that's why ?

anyway it's her feelings

Yeah, very confused broad. Now, what's she going to do?