Battered, Bruised But Still Hanging On To Your Boyfriend

Radiant  ''when a guy says any gurl he would have 2 beat that would b d end of d R/S--it means'' he will beat his gurlfrnd when caught doin smtin he dsnt like! That phrase is implicating!

Oh Oh --my bad i did not read meanin 2 it or My b i was waitin 4 Little Euph 2 come say smtin about it

@Radiant, Woleprof

That post was a joke, no woman beat me ohh!, Kai, she no dey fear face? 

 Not sure what to believe again 

  Oh so sad. That lady has so much low esteem for herself. She must just walk out of the relationship. It'll seem hard, but her man will not change. That is not love but torture.

SHE MUST LEAVE ASAP!!!

I cannot imagine her being treated as such, she's a special person and should be treated as such. She did not come into this world to be battered, hell no!! 

Tell your friend or if its you, to walk out immediately. There is another good man out there who can treat her/you even far more better than her current man. Or she can just stay single, it aint that bad aswell. ADVICE: If a man lays a hand on you for the first time, immediately walk out of that relationship, because, there will be more to come, believe me.

who would dare lay his hands on iice?

a girl once told me she can't marry a guy who wont beat her

and I was like 


apparently she loves both parents but seems to love her father more. And may I say, her dad beats her mum.

[/b] IT'S A CYCLE THAT'S PASSED ON FROM PARENTS!!! GUYS THAT SEE THEIR DAD ABUSING THEIR MOM MOST TIMES END UP BEING ABUSERS THEMSELVES. FEMALES THAT SAW THEIR MOM ABUSED WHILE GROWING ALSO END UP FALLING INO THE SAME TRAP because THEY THINK IT'S OKAY because THEIR MOM STUCK WITH THE DAMN GUY !!! I WISH SOME GUY WOULD TRY LIFTING A HAND TO MY SIS, THAT WILL BE THE LAST TIME HE'S ABLE TO MAKE USE OF THAT HAND!! BASTARD!!

@achinu maan you're really tough in cyberspace

lol

TOF, I asked her to explain o. Don't get it either 

I have read through all the posts adn i must say that RAdiant has been steadfast in her beliefs and i like that so ya'll sud back off telling her to ray that she does not find herself in a situation like that.

Women that stay in abusive relationships have very low self esteem, the fact that a lady falls inlove does not mean all sense of reasoning must be lost, and what is it with women thinking that they have supernatural powers to change a man?? My belief is that if he is not Good from day one he will never be good, so if a man raises his hand up to strike me it will be his very last b'because he might just turn up dead the next day. I don't believe in love that gives me a black eye.
I as a person have never been afarid of walking out of an abusive relationship, whether verbally or physically,
I did it once i will do it again if it ever happens, no man is ever worth  the pain.

"above all things i owe myself happiness"

a.k.a. I'm extremely selfish and unwilling to sacrifice myself for others.

@Radiant

That is far from the whole point of living.

No wonder Nigeria is still in a mess, everyone owes themselves happiness. Surprise , surprise!

If they beat you, call police and hope they have fuel in the car.

That's because you've always been involved in casual relationships.  As Mystique said, marriage is quite different, and you can't just walk out like that.

@Radiant

Who is to define what makes a person happy or what doesn't?, Some of these women who remain in these relationships are not just doing it because of low self-esteem. Most of them feel like their main aim in this life is to ensure that their kids grow up with the family intact no matter how tumultuous it might be. She might be taking the beating with hope that atleast she and her so-called husband will be around to see their kids grow up. That is what makes them happy and that might be different from what makes others like you happy.

Some of these men apart from the beating part tend to be very caring and provide for their families. Sometimes, these women get to see the loving and caring side of these men that strangers on the outside do not see. The occassional beating might not be enough for the woman to leave this man she knows can be caring and understanding when he isn't pissed. Sometimes these beating happen when the men are drunk and honestly not under control of themselves.

Again, sometimes the women know that they're loquacious and obnoxious (see Sista for example  ) and will understand that they've provoked the man. I'm going to be honest, I've met some woman who are straight up annoying and I've been tempted to smack them once in a while. I just walk away when it seems unbearable and some of them tend to pursue you and keep talking in your ear. Ok but when you're in a marriage, where are you going to run to?, You can't walk away, they best you can do is act out on your urges. After all, we're all equal human beings, when you're annoyed, you tend to employ the fist. 

Some of the men are just plain cowards on the other hand. Most of them do not get the respect they crave from their peers so their only idea of respect is in beating up their woman night in, night out. Those men are the ones I belt whip!

I don't support men beating men and neither do I support men beating women or women beating men. 

@topic 
Battered and bruised still hanging on, one has to understand the psychology of the abused at that point. After such brutality why would the woman or man still hang on? something must have gone wrong, or switched off at such a point . its not a one day thing, there must have been a history of violence, either systematic verbal or physical. Strange. I guess only someone who has been there could really shed light. But there are very many circumstances.


your ex husband became very violent you say and yet in the same breath you say he is not a violent man? this is a very ambigous statement. You may have helped him to seek help but that does not mean he is not violent, i mean lol he did beat you, how can he not be violent?