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timidsayo (f)
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nairaland pple
i am planning to marry dis guy , by next year we hv done introduction nd all dat,
he has loads of bad habits nd i do hv mine.
he is my first boyfrnd, he deflowered me like some yrs back, i got pregnant nd i had to remove it,(a big mistake dat i still regret till date)
he likes sexa alot nd i dont really, i love foreplay nd i think i hv bin circumsized as a child, cos i only come once nd it taks a while for me to come, my boyfrnd sees it as a challenge nd he always tries for me to come but atimes he gets really carried away nd he releases nd i am just left hanging. i really dont mind cos i am not reallly a sex person, but he did somtin recently dat got me thinkin, we r on a break now, he slept with a frnd of his nd d babe was even pregnant, d babe came to him for advice , she was impregnated by someone else nd d guy isnt forthcoming, her dad told her to keep it nd she doesnt so she came to my homeboy , one tin lead to another nd wam, i was out of the country then.
he confesed to me. i wuld never hv known if he didnt tell me.
i keep seein d babe in church, but i cant get pass it. d babe came to apologise to me hersef, she isnt a frnd of mine.
i knw he loves me nd everybody says it.
but he has cheated on me twice in like 3yrs of datin nd 4yrs of frndship, suming up to 7yrs.
shuld i leave him, or stay nd help him out, but by stayin am riskin my heart at d same time cos he mit still mess up,
i tell u pple , i knw deep down dat he loves me nd i love him, dat is so glarin even devil knws.
but as a frnd , he says i am his bestfrnd of which its true, he is mine also, shuld i risk my heart for a frnd
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posakosa (m)
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Yes, risk your life for your best friend. 
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timidsayo (f)
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hmmmmm thnk u ooooo
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araba1 (m)
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a leopard will always be a leopard but the devil u know is better than the angel u dont know why dont u stay with him cos all black guy are cheat even me
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tunery004 (m)
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2 long ddddd
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Ebonyeyes (f)
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Alarm bells are ringing in my ear with this story  Its up to you but I know deep in you are dragging your feet about this matter. Do you want to be in a marriage where you will always be wondering what your husband is up too? Think hard about this.
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SOMTO2
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he is a shamelss bastard,
how cud he sleep with some1 who is carrying some1 elses baby.
and she came to seek advice?
wow! some dudes just simply irritates me.
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Emperoh (m)
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Poster
One advice: If you can't tolerate his excesses and bad habits, pls don't ever think he will change or u can change him
Pack your bags and quit. If you can't tolerate him pls call it off. Its as simply as that!!he is a shamelss bastard,
how cud he sleep with some1 who is carrying some1 elses baby.
and she came to seek advice?
wow! some dudes just simply irritates me.
When you third leg begins to think for your brain, you are bound to do stupid things. this is the mildest of them
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190 (m)
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a leopard will always be a leopard but the devil u know is better than the angel u dont know why dont u stay with him cos all black guy are cheat even me
oMo I nor be cheat oh abeg! i have never cheated on my GF in 30years~~~ |
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ebila (m)
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@Poster, The guy cheated on u cos u r not a sex person n he is.Beliv me,your marriage ain't going to work,even u know it.So just let it go for both of your sakes.He'll be greatful for it.If u go ahead n get married to him,he'll still sleep wif someone else.He love sex! Except u r ready to start liking sex,just let him go n move on! |
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blapo (m)
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The best person to get married to is ones best friend, and i believe everybody has his/her own flaws, you better stick to him, you may not appreciate him now.
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candylips (m)
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dumb his ass mate
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4llerbe (m)
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SIGH. the only recommendation on nairaland for issues is DUMP HIM/HER na wah o!
so pls after the dumping which one of u guys is going to either marry her AND NOT CHEAT ON HER/ donate your brother or cousin or whoever who is not going to cheat on her?
then @poster the only part i have issues with u is the im not a sex person part, ok so your now looking for an impotent/ low libido man to marry? cos as sure as i know no fully active man doesnt like sex, and believe me the sex is like 50% of the glue holding your marriage. never mind what them say, once your sexlife aint going on, your marriage aint going anywhere.
all that he loves me is purely bullshit. sure he loves u but marrying u and being happily married and loving u are two different things o!
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Agnesqueen (f)
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SIGH. the only recommendation on nairaland for issues is DUMP HIM/HER na wah o!
so pls after the dumping which one of u guys is going to either marry her AND NOT CHEAT ON HER/ donate your brother or cousin or whoever who is not going to cheat on her?
then @poster the only part i have issues with u is the im not a sex person part, ok so your now looking for an impotent/ low libido man to marry? cos as sure as i know no fully active man doesnt like sex, and believe me the sex is like 50% of the glue holding your marriage. never mind what them say, once your sexlife aint going on, your marriage aint going anywhere.
all that he loves me is purely bullshit. sure he loves u but marrying u and being happily married and loving u are two different things o!
Wow sex is 50% of marriage? so when she is pregnant since she wont have sex with him because she cant. And after giving birth when she has to wait for about a month or more before having sex it means her marriage is over. She will be the blame for all his infidelities from then on? @poster You need to move on because if you marry this man, your friends and community will remind you when the marriage fails that you knew about his sexual exploits before the wedding and you shouldnt complain. He saved you a lot of problems in the future. Do you think that those are the only times he has cheated on you?. But i or anyone else here or in your life cannot force you to make a decision. The ultimate choice is up to you. So choose wisely. |
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speachless (m)
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Just follow your hrt
nairalanders might miss lead u.
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rooney86 (m)
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how is the fiancee a sex addict?
i doubt the poster knows the meaning of sex addict.
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Rooneyboy (m)
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Some men are just shameless dogs.
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biola44 (m)
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handwritins on d wall  |
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Rooneyboy (m)
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Some men are just shameless dogs.
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madambini (f)
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if a ma tells you he cheated on you, it means two things,
1. he doesnt have respect for you OR
2. he's a honest person.
from what i can see from yuor story, he is honest person,
All this men on NL that are talkinng, tll me if you have not cheated on your girlfriend at one point? Did u tell your girlfriend, PLEASE!
look, the only problem is see you have is the sex, ma dear, you will have to learn how to LOVE sex with your man! read books, learn it!
AND DO NOT LISTEN to the people that say u shud break up wit your man!
I av spoken
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TheSeeker (m)
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7 years of friendship and eventual relationship can't be toyed with especially with the things you've said. I have to tell you though that your man lacks taste and it's totally up to you to decide whether or not you're going to put up with all he has been and WILL STILL do. If I have to tell you the truth here, your guy is a cheat, given that he may be a real player, he must have cheated on you a number of times that you only knew of three instances.
If he could have slept with a friend who came for advise then what makes you so sure he hasn't been sleeping with any other person around? It's sad to say but you might be contributing to the problem at hand, although, most guys can't be satisfied by one woman, a lot still can attach their ability to cheat with not getting enough of sex from their women.
Back to your problem, you can still go ahead with him if you know you can put up with a cheat and be very ready for a shocker if you're going to try this; on the contrary, if you're the type that easily gets heartbroken, I'll advise you at least suspend the relationship for now and re-evaluate it -- there's nothing wrong with this -- get enough ample time to know what you both want and maybe you don't want this kind of relationship after all but you feel you do so for a number of reasons. He might love you, yes, but what's with the cheating?
Talking doesn't really solve it but it does help to know what kind of man you're involved with, how and where you stand. I can't tell you to go on, but I'd tell you to re-evaluate the relationship. DO NOT break your relationship just yet that might be very disastrous. A lot of people might tell you to break it off, but trust me, it's always twice as hard to find another person who will fit perfectly in that description; so, while you can, try to work out your relationship and know what happens next, and that will tell you what to do.
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Rooneyboy (m)
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Some men are just shameless dogs.
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Rooneyboy (m)
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Some men are just shameless dogs.
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justwise (m)
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a leopard will always be a leopard but the devil u know is better than the angel u dont know why dont u stay with him cos all black guy are cheat even me
Yes u are a cheat and speak for urself or learn how to type some next time. |
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justwise (m)
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@Op.
Its your life but remember, he will always walk all over u while u still feeling loved
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chidipupay (m)
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My take on this is simple. The guy cheated and accepted he did that. although it is very hard to digest. but I think you have known your man to be a cheat, and cheating is one of the greatest hurt in a relationship. If your man cheats and still treats you fine. I will advice you give him a break a little while. If he comes back to you then know he is serious. To be honest with you, it is very difficult to find a guy that will be 100% faithful. I want you to evaluate if his advantages are greater than disadvantage, vice versa then from the you can know where you stand
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chic2pimp (m)
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a leopard will always be a leopard but the devil u know is better than the angel u dont know why dont u stay with him cos all black guy are cheat even me
Why are you OKAY?  . You would have been better off saying 'I CHEAT' |
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4llerbe (m)
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AHHHH! @ agnesqueen, so when you are married and pregnant u dont shag your husband?
look i do knw from my doc pals dt u do shag your wifey till like the 7th month though personally, HELL NO!.
but rwally u missing the point, like hell sex isn't important, what do they teach u in your marriage counselling sessions?
why do u people like playing ostrich, whether u like it or not IT IS BIG DEAL TO MEN, LEARN TO DEAL WITH IT.
u really think its ALL about hE LIKES ME FOR ME, LIKES GISTING WITH ME BLA BLA BLA? the primary thing that seperates you from his siter, mom,friends etc is that he shags u!!!!!!!! u really think all the other crap is enuf to hold a marriage together???
i pray u dont learn the hard way and yes your husband is gonna have to stay off sex for some time but if u know wats gud for u better let him have it in other ways cos its that pregnancy days a lot of guy get the time to look around.
its about how much u put into it, besides if only most of u girls could get your man to be truly honest with u, there are a million fantasies and sexcapades he wishes he could do with u, and he really doesnt think your a good lay, but how do u tell that to a woman u have put up with for a period of time?
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igbonla (m)
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@ poster,
The best time for a guy to show his best character is prior to marriage, if you know what I mean. Nobody goes in with truckload of issues and distrust.
Your guy is doing all these at this point in the relationship? Getting somebody pregnant and all that and even without using protection? Does he have plans to kill you? It's your call, stay put if you can bear it but be very prepared because the guy is not stopping when you eventually get married.
I believe that a broken engagement is better than a broken marriage,
All the best.
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