Confessions Of A Transexual. I Had More Fun As A Female Than As A Male!

I was born female, but I didn't really like it. I have always admired girls more, but not in a lesbian manner. I wanted to really love girls like a guy. So when I was 21 I had the liberty to undergo a sexual change. My mom would have disagreed but she is dead, my dad never bothers about anything concerning me anyway. So I went ahead and did it. It was weird cos so many things are different now, at first I still used to feel very feminine. In fact, people accused me of being gay. To make matters worse, Im still a virgin. The girls I used to fantasize about being with, I cant even approach them now. I just want to be friends with them, but I feel very uncomfortable around guys.

The surgeon said it was a major step and I will not be able to go back, but I wish I could go back. I have thought of committing suicide many times but my friends have always saved me. Many times, my friends (they dont know my history because I did the surgery in the UK before I came back to 9ja) that are guys, they have made plans to have sex with one girl or the other and dump her afterwards and I always step in to save the girl from their hands because I have been there. In one case, it landed me in trouble. I even fell in love with the girl in the process. I discussed it here on NL and people were castigating me without understanding all the pains I'm even going through.

http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-342673.0.html

And yes, I have a girlfriend now. I don't have sex with her because  i don't believe in premarital sex, and also because it is weird. Just thinking about it makes me feel like a homo. I'm very confused now about my sexuality. Does anybody have any advice for me?

Thanks clogogo, but i really need to know what to do. This thing is starting to mess me up inside,

I doubt that my girlfriend will understand. I tested her already by asking her what she would do if she found out that I was actually a whiteman in a black skin, a reverse of Michael Jackson and she did not talk to me for two hours, she said I was deliberately trying to make her vomit, that it was a nasty and irritating thing to even think about. If i tell her the truth, she will really freak out.

I have been seeing a psychologist (NOT psychiatrist o) but all that she's doing is to simply try to make me forget the girl inside me. i dont think its going to work. In my dreams I keep seeing myself as a girl. Never as a boy.

I have been praying too, but I dont even know again.

Yes thats what the surgeon meant. I had to sign a consent form with the understanding that if in the future I wanted a reverse transexual operation, things are not guaranteed to work fine. I may not be able to have kids again, although my hormones can be reactivated and I can feel like a woman. He also said that there may be other complications which he didnt mention exactly. It is not usually advisable to do a reverse transexual operation, he said.

ewwwww shemale!!!

it pays to keep ignorance in the dark

poster i'll advice you to get intouch with more transexuals.
I think u became a transexual waay too early. The process is genrally transgender before u make the commitment to have the operations done

ROFLMAO 

WHEN U DID IT U ENJOYED IT NOW, DID ANYONE ADVICE YOU FROM HERE AND WHY SHOULD YOU COME HERE AND START

MAKE US VOMIT.


WELL SHA, U ARE ONE IN A MILLION, YOU NEED TO APPRECIATE THAT NO ONE BE LIKE YOU FROM PSQUARE, ENJOY YOURSELF SHEMALE

na wa ooooo!!!
im not surprised this came from my hollandis boo!!   
dont worry, i will deal with you later sha.
lolol   

yes oooooo

i was getting ready to type her/him a reply.
na wa ooooo.

what do i say? im still thinking.

I dont expect any pity from any of you, thanks. What I need is advice. Do you think a reverse surgery is worth the possibility of future complications?

hmm, what i think you should o is
1.go and see the surgeon and let him explain in details what the complications-that will arise from a reversal-really are
2.consider these complications seriously and weigh them against the phycological complications you are experiencing now.
3.finally decide which one of them(complicatons) you can or cannot live with and go for the one you can live with e.g if say you may not be able to have kids will be the danger of a reversal, and as it is now the phycological effect is the complication of the  change.then you have to decide which one it will be.
but candidly i would advise you to go for the reversal if the dangers or complication can be managed.that way you will be at peace. good luck.

Why did you want to be a male in the first place  is that you in your profile  I'm just curious to know.

I don't really know what to tell you 'cause to be honest I haven't seen anyone like you. I mean, female-male and back to being female again  Listen to your surgeon I'd say.

ehyaaaaaaaaaaaa pele
i love me too much and i love the fact that i am female too
goodluck with what ever decision you make dear

hun, i done told you before
get with other transexuals,  it will help u a great deal and there is nothing stopping you from visiting other trained surgeons
a second, third, even tenth educated opinion is never wrong