Deliver Us From Akpan

Welcome. Please Login, Register, Or Activate! 
type your username and password to login
Date: November 25, 2009, 11:03 AM
432289 members and 299262 Topics
Latest Member: plushy
Nairaland [Nigerian Forum] Home Help Search Who is currently online? Login Register
Nairaland Forum  |  General | Welcome  |  Family (Moderator: Tgirl4real)  |  Deliver Us From Akpan
Pages: (1) Go Down Send this topic Notify of replies
Author Topic: Deliver Us From Akpan  (Read 135 views)
atkinboy
Deliver Us From Akpan
« on: November 03, 2009, 03:13 PM »

Grin Smiley Huh
AKPAN bought a new mobile phone. He sent a message to everyone on his phone book.

The message reads:

My mobile number has changed; earlier it was Nokia 3310, now it is Nokia 6610. Please take note, 

In a conversation:

AKPAN : I am proud because my son is in Medical College
Friend: Really? What is he studying?
AKPAN: No, he is not studying, they are studying him.

Akpan visits his Doctor :

AKPAN: Doctor, in my dreams I play football every night.
DOCTOR: Take these drugs and you will be okay.
AKPAN: Can I take it tomorrow? Tonight is the final game.
 
Akpan and his wife :
AKPAN: If 2mrow I die, will you remarry?
Wife: No! I will stay with my sister but if I die will you remarry?
AKPAN: No, I will also stay with your sister.
 
AKPAN: People consider me as a “GOD”
Wife: How do you know?
AKPAN: When I went to the park today, everybody said, oh GOD, you have come again.
 
AKPAN comes back to his car and finds a note saying “parking fine”
He writes a note and sticks it to a pole “Thanks for the compliment”
 
How do you recognize Akpan in school?
He is the one who erases the notes from his book when the teacher erases the board.
 
Once AKPAN was walking, he had a glove in one hand and none on the other hand. So a man asked him why he did so. He replied: The weather forecast announced that on one hand, it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.

AKPAN: Why are all these people running?
Man: This is a race; the winner will get the cup.
AKPAN: If only the winner will get the Cup, why are the others running?
 

In a classroom:

Teacher: “I killed a person. Convert this sentence into future tense”
AKPAN: The future tense is “You will go to jail”.
 

AKPAN told his servant: “Go and water the plants!”
Servant: “It is already raining”
AKPAN: “So what? Take an umbrella and go”

I think Akpan is smart, his foolishness shows he still has a brain.
nwaka_80 (f)
Re: Deliver Us From Akpan
« #1 on: November 04, 2009, 03:22 PM »

shoudn't this topic have been better in the joke section.
atkinboy
Re: Deliver Us From Akpan
« #2 on: November 05, 2009, 08:28 PM »

Thank u have resend it in the joke section,never the less u can still enjoy it,,,,
throttler (f)
Re: Deliver Us From Akpan
« #3 on: November 06, 2009, 10:20 AM »

hilarious akpan mumu Grin
atkinboy
Re: Deliver Us From Akpan
« #4 on: November 10, 2009, 09:47 AM »

Did u think akpan is mumu or smart
 What Would You Do For Your Mommy This Mothers' Day  Chill Guy  Are You Parents Or Nannies  Page 2
Pages: (1) Go Up Send Topic to Friend by E-mail Reply 


Sections: Autos/Cars (2) Jobs/Vacancies (2) (3) Career Talk Education General(2) Politics Romance Computers Phones Travel
Sports Fashion Health Religion Celebrities TV/Movies (2) Music/Radio (2) Books Webmasters Programming

Links: Page1 Page2 Page3 Page4 Page5 Page6 Page7 Page8 Page9 Page10

Nairaland is owned by Oluwaseun Osewa. See also: Nairalist Classified Ads
Nairaland Forum | Powered by SMF 1.0.12.
© 2001-2005, Lewis Media. All Rights Reserved.