Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage

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Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Romance (Moderators: mukina2, iice)  |  Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
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Author Topic: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage  (Read 4912 views)
davidylan (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #32 on: January 07, 2007, 10:08 PM »

wonders shall never end! See women bandying the words "divorce" and "marriage" like its mere eating and drinking!  Shocked

1. Respect your partner! DO NOT CHEAT!
2. Learn to forgive and forget, (e hard small but at least try!)
3. Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!
4. Dont go into marriage with divorce at the back of your mind, be optimistic haba!
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #33 on: January 07, 2007, 10:11 PM »

I'm optimistic but not naive tho'. Shit happens!  Smiley
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #34 on: January 07, 2007, 10:12 PM »

Quote from: Radiant on January 07, 2007, 10:05 PM
Donzy, why did you then talk about getting prepared for a next buyer?



That's for the women who will leave at the first instance of marriage and you have to realize that if you keep your husband around you, chances are he won't cheat. If you prefer work to your man, he'll definitely look for contact elsewhere.

Quote from: davidylan on January 07, 2007, 10:08 PM
wonders shall never end! See women bandying the words "divorce" and "marriage" like its mere eating and drinking! Shocked

1. Respect your partner! DO NOT CHEAT!
2. Learn to forgive and forget, (e hard small but at least try!)
3. Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!
4. Dont go into marriage with divorce at the back of your mind, be optimistic haba!

Yeah, you're quite right about that. Most folks nowadays go into marriage being all pessimistic and ready to bail at the first sight of trouble. I blame America!
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #35 on: January 07, 2007, 10:14 PM »

Why blame America?
davidylan (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #36 on: January 07, 2007, 10:17 PM »

Blame America! Thanks to them divorce has now been glamorised! Marriage is no better than a mere legal and financial contract where all both parties are thinking about is how long they need to remain "married" in order to be entitled to a certain amount of money.

Every where lawyers are advertising divorce made easy! Women get the house, most of the time they get the kids, you lose half your fortune to them and yet you still end up paying child and spousal support forever so she doesnt ever need to get a job! Wow, why wont women be thinking of divorce at the first sign the guy is leaving his socks around the house?
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #37 on: January 07, 2007, 10:19 PM »

Well they're the ones that have taken the pride off marriage, trivialized the whole process. Marriage isn't meant to be trial and error but a lifetime commitment but American culture has killed that off. If you got into marriage knowing it's a lifetime commitment, men will be persuaded to control their sexual urges and women will be persuaded to put effort into keeping the always wayward man happy. With divorce rate at 50%, nobody cares, most people will put more time into work than into marriage. The whole thing annoys me actually!
mukina2 (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #38 on: January 07, 2007, 10:21 PM »

if my husband cheats on me i'll leave him for good
simple as abc
no use being around a cheating man . .the next time he'll do worst
davidylan (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #39 on: January 07, 2007, 10:22 PM »

divorce rate only 50%? I thought it was 75%!

No one is bothering to put in any effort into marriage anymore because for some it is more lucrative to get a divorce than to bother putting up with someone who as much as forgets to take the thrash out.

Men cheat in marriage! Not all men do! Some are actually committed to making the marriage work, it does not help if the spouse is busy plotting which lawyer to call first sign she sees a strange number on the poor boy's phone!
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #40 on: January 07, 2007, 10:25 PM »

I'm on the same wavelength with Davidylan here.  Cool
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #41 on: January 07, 2007, 10:32 PM »

Like I said, I won't leave the man immediately. I'll give him a grace period but there's always a limit ya know.

Donzman and David, what happens if your wife is cheating on you on a constant basis? Honest answers please! Thanks! Smiley
ThiefOfHearts (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #42 on: January 07, 2007, 10:37 PM »

As for you Donz, no you are NOT on the same length as David as you're going around like some lunatic rambling that all men cheat so woman should just deal even though you already said you would leave your wife if she were to cheat on you as well, so what in hell is the difference? So you should be able to just leave but women should just stay, is that what you're saying?


What people don't understand when they blame the west for "glamorizing divorce" is that the ONLY reason why African women don't do the same when they are confronted by situations that call for it is because they're so fucking dependent on their husbands that it's pathetic. Majority of them are house slaves aka housewives so how can they leave? Husband beat them up, bring in other women, give them herpes, whatever, they stay anyway because they believe there's nothing they can do without a husband and I find that to be so depressing.
I'm not saying get a divorce over every little thing but there are certain things that warrent it. How can you be proud of woman that stay with a violent husband for example? Is that something to take pride in, that they have to stay because of the shame they will get from society?
ThiefOfHearts (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #43 on: January 07, 2007, 10:38 PM »

Quote from: Radiant on January 07, 2007, 10:32 PM
.

Donzman and David, what happens if your wife is cheating on you on a constant basis? Honest answers please! Thanks! Smiley

Donzman already said on the first page that he would leave his wife. Are you minding that hypocrite?
davidylan (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #44 on: January 07, 2007, 10:38 PM »

 ;d
goodguy (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #45 on: January 07, 2007, 10:45 PM »

Quote from: davidylan on January 07, 2007, 10:38 PM
My line is perfect. . . I'll call you in a minute. . . Wink

I see. Cool  No wonder you came barging into my thread to support her, while pretending to 'cool us down'.

And oh. . I thought you were not like me and 'the other guys'. Grin

Hypocrite. Cheesy
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #46 on: January 07, 2007, 10:50 PM »

Quote from: ThiefOfHearts on January 07, 2007, 10:38 PM
Donzman already said on the first page that he would leave his wife. Are you minding that hypocrite?

There's nothing hypocritic about it, if I've put in sincere effort into the marriage and the woman cheats, what other options do I have? Undecided. . . The problem is that most people aren't putting any effort into the marriage and are ever willing to leave, no thanks to America's culture of divorce.

Quote
As for you Donz, no you are NOT on the same length as David as you're going around like some lunatic rambling that all men cheat so woman should just deal even though you already said you would leave your wife if she were to cheat on you as well, so what in hell is the difference? So you should be able to just leave but women should just stay, is that what you're saying?

No that is not what I'm saying. I'm saying that there's a reason this cheating happens in the first place, could it be because the woman isn't doing something right?. . . I attribute some of the cheating to women being lackadaisical in marriage, men aren't feeling the love so they go and get it elsewhere. Some women love the career more than they love the husband, you're one of them?
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #47 on: January 07, 2007, 10:53 PM »

  Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy@ goodguy

I love myself so much that what people/society say about me is like butter on a hot knife. I don't give a fcuk especially when it comes to my freedom and happiness. I'm my greatest critic so whatever people say about me is like talking to the walls.

Apart from marital unfaithfulness and physical abuse, it might get to a point that I'll be sick of the man and the whole marriage thing, and all I'll do is explain to the man how I feel and simply leave and be free.

I actually see marriage as slavery! Sorry to say it but that's how I feel.
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #48 on: January 07, 2007, 10:57 PM »

Quote
I actually see marriage as slavery! Sorry to say it but that's how I feel.

That is the attitude I'm talking about, now why would you be upset if your man cheats when you project such an attitude?. . .  Undecided
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #49 on: January 07, 2007, 11:02 PM »

What I can do, I'll do and what I can't, I won't do! Is that a reason for a man to cheat?

You guys are funny. Forgetting a woman and her husband can be cheating too huh?  Grin
ThiefOfHearts (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #50 on: January 07, 2007, 11:03 PM »

Quote from: Donzman on January 07, 2007, 10:50 PM
There's nothing hypocritic about it, if I've put in sincere effort into the marriage and the woman cheats, what other options do I have? Undecided. . .
No that is not what I'm saying. I'm saying that there's a reason this cheating happens in the first place, could it be because the woman isn't doing something right?. . . I attribute some of the cheating to women being lackadaisical in marriage, men aren't feeling the love so they go and get it elsewhere. Some women love the career more than they love the husband, you're one of them?

DONZ, Who cussed you? I swear I will kill the person. This is a sickness, you can't possibly be this senile from the womb

So if a woman cheats then ok you can leave because obviously she's horrible and ungrateful but if it's a guy that cheats then it's the woman's fault.

May it not be well for whoever cussed you with such madness.
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #51 on: January 07, 2007, 11:08 PM »

roflmao  Grin Tiffy baby, na madness heee?  Grin
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #52 on: January 07, 2007, 11:08 PM »

Quote from: ThiefOfHearts on January 07, 2007, 11:03 PM
DONZ, Who cussed you? I swear I will kill the person. This is a sickness, you can't possibly be this senile from the womb

So if a woman cheats then ok you can leave because obviously she's horrible and ungrateful but if it's a guy that cheats then it's the woman's fault.

May it not be well for whoever cussed you with such madness.

Again, I never said none of that. What applies to the woman applies to the man.

To make it cleaerer, if a partner puts in sincere effort into a marriage and the other partner cheats, the individual has every right to call it quits. Clearer now?. . . Try R&C and it probably won't sound senile to you.

Quote
What I can do, I'll do and what I can't, I won't do! Is that a reason for a man to cheat?

Well here is an advice, do not do something you're not ready to do for the rest of your life early in a relationship. Don't bath the man if you're not ready to bath him for the rest of your life. Cheesy
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #53 on: January 07, 2007, 11:11 PM »

It's all about, a little' bit of this and a 'little bit of that. No greediness will be tolerated but everything in moderation and there's no room for ungratefulness in my books.  Tongue
ThiefOfHearts (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #54 on: January 07, 2007, 11:17 PM »

Quote from: Donzman on January 07, 2007, 11:08 PM
To make it cleaerer, if a partner puts in sincere effort into a marriage and the other partner cheats, the individual has every right to call it quits. Clearer now?. . . Try R&C and it probably won't sound senile to you.

re-read what you wrote concerning yourself and then me and see the differences.

you craze.  Cry
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #55 on: January 07, 2007, 11:22 PM »

Quote from: ThiefOfHearts on January 07, 2007, 11:17 PM
re-read what you wrote concerning yourself and then me and see the differences.

you craze. Cry

Ohh sorry about that, I was just assuming you're one of those women who go into marriage not willing to put your all into it.  Undecided Shocked

By the way, thanks for cussing those who put this madness into me.  Grin Grin
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #56 on: January 07, 2007, 11:24 PM »

I always enjoy when Tiffy and Donz scratch on their faces  Grin Grin Grin
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #57 on: January 07, 2007, 11:29 PM »

Quote from: Radiant on January 07, 2007, 11:24 PM
I always enjoy when Tiffy and Donz scratch on their faces Grin Grin Grin

Sorry I'm not one for catfights!  Cool
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #58 on: January 07, 2007, 11:40 PM »

C'mon shatap there! What u feeling like?
ThiefOfHearts (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #59 on: January 07, 2007, 11:41 PM »

you mind am?  Tongue
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #60 on: January 07, 2007, 11:47 PM »

Radiant, ThiefofHearts. . . Can we get a conclusion now?  Grin Grin
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #61 on: January 07, 2007, 11:48 PM »

Ohhh! I think say u deh mad true true  Tongue Grin Grin Grin
Donzman (m)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #62 on: January 07, 2007, 11:52 PM »

I'm 100% sane so you don't have to worry about me!!  Smiley
Radiant (f)
Re: Radiant & I Discuss: cheating in the marriage
« #63 on: January 07, 2007, 11:55 PM »

Ok! All thanks to TOH for killing your enemies  Grin Grin Grin
 Can You Date Your Cousin?  My Sister's Boyfriend is Asking Me Out  Is It A Tradition For A Married Man To Have A Girlfriend?  Page 2
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