Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?

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Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Family  |  Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
Poll
Question: Is corporal punishment right or wrong?
Yes, it's very often right. - 7 (77.8%)
No, it's almost always wrong. - 2 (22.2%)
Total Votes: 9

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Author Topic: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?  (Read 361 views)
sweetberry (f)
Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« on: February 25, 2007, 10:21 PM »

Do you believe in spanking a child if he/she [does something bad]?

If no what other method do you use to correct your child.

I think there are some children that are so stuborn you can't just sit them down & talk to them because they wouldn't listen.
fatliar (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #1 on: February 25, 2007, 10:42 PM »

i love ur profile
cute-ass (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #2 on: February 26, 2007, 01:30 AM »

Well the bible does say, "spoil the rod and spare the child" but the truth of the matter is that every kid/child is different. Some kids obey to spanking while others obey to oral corrections, its just left for the parent to find out what tune his/her kid dances to.

Here in Norway(and i'm sure, many other countries) its against the law to spank a kid, as a parent , you might even risk your kid dialling the 911 number.
So when i was a kid, say about 3-4 years old, Cool each time i was naughty, my mum would lock me in the toilet and swith off the light and i'll have to sit in there for hours on end Cry Cry Cry.
I've never bothered to ask her what effect that treatmeant had om me but i'll guess positive since she continued with the method for a looonnnnggg time Cool

I guess that's why she made up her mind to send me down to Nigeria for primary and secondary education, to be thoroughly disciplined. I know of lots of our family friends both in the UK, US and here in Norway that do the same (as in send their kids to Nigeria, to live there for some years)
For that i'll ever remain grateful to my parents, it didn't seem as fun at the time but now i couldn't be happier for the lady i've turned out to be Cool
Bolarge (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #3 on: February 27, 2007, 11:44 AM »

 Whoop da silly brat's ass!! Angry
 Can't count d number of times mine got whooped. Grin
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #4 on: February 27, 2007, 12:17 PM »

Quote
there are some children that are so stuborn you can't just sit them down & talk to them because they wouldn't listen.
That's the lame excuse used by every irresponsible parent.  It's a lie.  Almost all children can be talked to.
Free (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #5 on: February 28, 2007, 08:06 AM »

is not wrong to spank a child

it all depnds on how hard u spank and how often

u dnt have to spank em' for evry bad thing ,

kids nowadays need some spanking

aint natin wrong wit it, i was spanked as a child

look how i turned out, perfectly fine Grin Grin Grin Grin
Grouppoint (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #6 on: March 01, 2007, 03:50 PM »

Before I started having children, I said to myself that I would never smack my kids.
Now I am living the reality, andaAgainst all my plans, I find that children can be so frustrating that many times it appears the only way to get the ideas into their mindset is to smack them.

What I do afterwards is explain to them what they did wrong. I ensure that they are clear on it and I extract a promise from them that it wont happen again. Also, if it happens, then they know whats coming to them.


Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #7 on: March 02, 2007, 12:14 AM »

Nowadays, I might only hit a child if I catch him hitting his junior ones.  Beating is not worth it, in my opinion.  It only increases the distance between the adult and the child.  Fear is not the best tool for controlling them.
Bolarge (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #8 on: March 02, 2007, 09:40 AM »

 No disrespect intended but Oga Seun d'you mind intimating us on the reason for this selective deleting of posts?
Grouppoint (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #9 on: March 02, 2007, 11:01 AM »

Quote from: Seun on March 02, 2007, 12:14 AM
Nowadays, I might only hit a child if I catch him hitting his junior ones. Beating is not worth it, in my opinion. It only increases the distance between the adult and the child. Fear is not the best tool for controlling them.

Seun. Are you then saying that retribution is your preferred tool?

Children can drive one crazy. One really has to be in the position to appreciate what parents go through, especially the mothers. Sometimes you really just want to  Angry exorcise your own child. Its really that bad sometimes.
LadyT (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #10 on: March 02, 2007, 11:18 AM »

Children rule their parents nowadays.  No one likes to be smacked.  I hated being smacked but I can now see it was needed.  We were always smacked after being given warnings.  I think it should be a last resort and children should understand why they were smacked. 

Nowadays I wish I could get a smack instead of the horrendous lectures my mum gives! Grin

I will smack my kids if needed.
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #11 on: March 02, 2007, 11:39 AM »

It won't be needed unless you choose not to devote enough time to your kids.
LadyT (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #12 on: March 02, 2007, 12:15 PM »

Thats a lie Seun.  All children are different.  But tell me unless you plan to home school them and give up your job it will be impossible to spend enough time with them as you have put it.  Even if they have a good grounding at home they can still pick up bad habits.  And if lecturing doesnt work.  A short hard slap across the arse will!
4 Play (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #13 on: March 02, 2007, 12:19 PM »

Seun speaks with all the confidence of a man who is not yet a father.By the time he becomes a father,he will be realistic.

I too used to think like that but when I listen to people who actually have kids,i realise that sometimes you have to spank them
4 Play (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #14 on: March 02, 2007, 12:20 PM »

@Groupoint
So you spank your kid?Social services are on their way Grin
bunmii (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #15 on: March 02, 2007, 12:27 PM »

Quote from: 4 Play on March 02, 2007, 12:20 PM
@Groupoint
So you spank your kid?Social services are on their way Grin

social services lol that is the problem you can't say slap a child in public without people lookin at you as if you have done something abominable or you fearing social services won't come banging on your door

@ topic  i believe you got to smack a kid once or twice but not everytime just to correct them, they wouldn't break if you smack them. next time they wouldn't do it what you smack then for again well some kid won't
mamaput (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #16 on: March 03, 2007, 01:15 PM »

I can count how many times i layed hands on my kids. And each time it was frustration.
Only once when my daughter was 3 and ran on the road and once still three wanted to throw something at me.
But i have found a better soulation.
My kids have all the freedom to do what they want and go were thery want sometimes i only find a note at home telling me were they are.
But they have to know for themselves were they can go and for how long. Because my motto is ."Nobody has to fight for their freedom but i can take it away from them"
They are not fools so they know by them selves that if they mess up they have a high price to pay. A very high one as that.
Grouppoint (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #17 on: March 08, 2007, 01:08 PM »

Quote from: 4 Play on March 02, 2007, 12:20 PM
@Groupoint
So you spank your kid?Social services are on their way Grin

Na you sabi.  Wink That's a story for another day. You will need to educate your kids on what to say when social services do come  Lips sealed, otherwise.

But really, the frustartion has been known to send mothers into severe depresion. Why do you think many oyibos these days don't want to have any children?
They have weighed the whole thing and since they can't bear to smack a child, then they wont even bother to have one.
Riff-Raff
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #18 on: March 14, 2007, 10:13 AM »

Quote from: Free on February 28, 2007, 08:06 AM
is not wrong to spank a child

it all depnds on how hard u spank and how often

i dnt have to spank em' for evry bad thing ,

kids nowadays need some spanking

aint natin wrong wit it, i was spanked as a child

look how i turned out, perfectly fine Grin Grin Grin Grin

i was spanked as a kid look how i turned out, tout  Cry Cry Cry Cry

it's wrong to spank kids, it widen the gap between adults and kids.
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #19 on: March 14, 2007, 10:50 AM »

Quote
Seun speaks with all the confidence of a man who is not yet a father.
By the time he becomes a father,he will be realistic.
I'm a principled man.  I won't suddenly become a child abuser just because my children are bugging me.
However, if I catch my child hitting or beating her junior ones or other children, I might do the same to her.

Quote
But tell me unless you plan to home school them and give up your job it will be impossible to spend enough time with them as you have put it.
If I have to choose between home-schooling my child and hitting her like a monkey, I'D go ahead and home-school her.   What's the point in having a child if you're not going to devote lots of time to raising the child? Huh
nnada (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #20 on: March 14, 2007, 11:04 AM »

Spanking a child is not wrong, because am somebody today, my parents especially my mum spanked me.
It is not every thing u talk to a child about, sometimes, before they understand u are serious, u must spank them, because some are dead sturbbon Grin
Free (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #21 on: March 14, 2007, 11:40 PM »

tank U, am wit U Grin Grin
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #22 on: March 15, 2007, 08:21 AM »

Quote
Spanking a child is not wrong, because am somebody today, my parents especially my mum spanked me.
It is not every thing u talk to a child about, sometimes, before they understand u are serious, u must spank them, because some are dead stubborn
I've been able to get along with quite a few "stubborn" children without the use of a cane.  Yes, it was quite exhausting, which is why I won't start breeding until I have the time to do it properly.  Most of the so-called "stubborn" children are just naturally restless.  You just need to occupy them with lots of work, sports and games.
dudu-bobo
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #23 on: March 17, 2007, 11:12 AM »

does the bible not say that foolishness is bound in the heart of a child and the rod of correction drives it far from him?
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #24 on: March 17, 2007, 11:53 AM »

No, that was Solomon.  The same man who couldn't control his lust for women.  You should ignore him.
namdee (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #25 on: March 18, 2007, 08:30 PM »

Nothing wrong in spanking child,@seun it is easy to say you won't do such,wait till you have yours and find out if they require such measures.I have seen kids that are smart,testing to see what you will do if they try something nutty,and they easily take your mildness for granted.
LadyT (f)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #26 on: March 18, 2007, 09:55 PM »

I'm sure Seun will spank his child or children.  I love his "ideal" world fantasy that stuff don't happen its hilarious you think you can home school your children yet you are a strong advocator for people to run their own business  Wink how will you manage that when you have kids you want to home school or will you expect your wife to be a fulltime mother? 

If you warn them several times and they don't listen give them a smack.

Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #27 on: March 18, 2007, 09:59 PM »

Quote
If you warn them several times and they don't listen give them a smack.
I refuse. I didn't require such measures as a child, and I'm yet to meet a child that requires such measures. However, I've met children who have been beaten so much that they are less sensitive. I have also met some sensitive children, who would cry if you look at them the wrong way. I won't smack anyone who doesn't smack others.
dudu-bobo
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #28 on: March 19, 2007, 12:01 PM »

Quote from: Seun on March 17, 2007, 11:53 AM
No, that was Solomon. The same man who couldn't control his lust for women. You should ignore him.

It is the Bible.

I was spanked a few times as a child and it never killed me. It helped put me on the straight and narrow. I have my own children now and I have had to spank the first one a couple of times before when he was younger. i have not had any need to do so again.

I wont ignore anything the bible tells me. Our legislators are a bunch of thieves. yet, we don't ignore the laws they make.
Seun (m)
Re: Spanking A Child: Right Or Wrong?
« #29 on: March 19, 2007, 10:43 PM »

Quote
I wont ignore anything the bible tells me. Our legislators are a bunch of thieves. yet, we don't ignore the laws they make.
That's primarily because we can be thrown in jail if we disobey them.  In the case of Solomon, that won't happen. Wink
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