Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?

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Author Topic: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?  (Read 9201 views)
asoderock (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #32 on: March 09, 2007, 11:00 AM »

As far i am concerned sex is one of the litmus to test for a girl's love for a guy.
To still deny it from this guy after 2.5 years despite not bieng a virgin, is a negative result, meaning: he doesn't really care for this guy's needs.
My guy "tear race" now.


How do you justify love if you don't care for the needs of your lover, including sexual needs.

It 's time gals understand that there is a difference between their sexual predispositon and that of the guys.
smartsoft (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #33 on: March 09, 2007, 11:14 AM »

"Take Off "n "Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ly"
natasha (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #34 on: March 09, 2007, 11:17 AM »

guys like u remind me of my ex. We dated for 3.5 years and broke up mainly because of the sex issue. i dated for 2 years in my second relationship which ended in marriage. In all, i never had sex. I married a virgin.
I believe if u truly love her "which i don't think u do" and u believe u have a future together, then waiting to consumate your marriage 'll be the best for u. You'll be making love for the rest of your life in marriage, so while start now and get tired 6 months after. What happens if she gets pregnant, think about her faith, her christianity, her dignity.
Just because she made a mistake doesnt mean she should continue in it.
I don't think u value her because for you to say "she's not even a virgin" shows how much respect n regards u have for her. She was open, true, faithful and honest to u to tell u she was no more a virgin.
At the end of the day, it's your call. Are u ready to throw away a  2yr relationship because of sex? If sex is worth that much to u, then go ahead and do what u have to do, but u know, there's alot of difference between happiness and fulfillment. Just because u want to brag to your friends that u are having sex with your girl doesnt mean u should jeopardise what u have with her. Remember what attracted u to her in the first place. Think twice.
I personally think u are a small KID who suffers from intimidation and inferiority complex, a kid who cannot control his "wankas" and a kid who hangs out with no good boys that sit and talk about sex all day, a kid i'll never advise my cousins to hang out: That's who u are.
nigeriana (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #35 on: March 09, 2007, 11:19 AM »

Hey Bolarge, Good talk
futy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #36 on: March 09, 2007, 11:24 AM »

My guy.
      Pele ti e o(yoruba's accent)You be 4k up guy nah.u guys have  been dating for 2years plus and you are yet to have sex with her and you still dey ask wetin u go do.You be confirm sir were.You wan turn to folorunsho be that.I mean sey u wan dey keep her for some other guy.Oboy u beta wake up.
futy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #37 on: March 09, 2007, 11:30 AM »

H
Quote from: natasha on March 09, 2007, 11:17 AM
guys like u remind me of my ex. We dated for 3.5 years and broke up mainly because of the sex issue. i dated for 2 years in my second relationship which ended in marriage. In all, i never had sex. I married a virgin.
I believe if u truly love her "which i don't think u do" and u believe u have a future together, then waiting to consumate your marriage 'll be the best for u. You'll be making love for the rest of your life in marriage, so while start now and get tired 6 months after. What happens if she gets pregnant, think about her faith, her christianity, her dignity.
Just because she made a mistake doesnt mean she should continue in it.
I don't think u value her because for you to say "she's not even a virgin" shows how much respect n regards u have for her. She was open, true, faithful and honest to u to tell u she was no more a virgin.
At the end of the day, it's your call. Are u ready to throw away a  2yr relationship because of sex? If sex is worth that much to u, then go ahead and do what u have to do, but u know, there's alot of difference between happiness and fulfillment. Just because u want to brag to your friends that u are having sex with your girl doesnt mean u should jeopardise what u have with her. Remember what attracted u to her in the first place. Think twice.
I personally think u are a small KID who suffers from intimidation and inferiority complex, a kid who cannot control his "wankas" and a kid who hangs out with no good boys that sit and talk about sex all day, a kid i'll never advise my cousins to hang out: That's who u are.
Hey am sure you are drunk or probably you don't know what you talking about because if you do,you won't be trying ta make a full out of yourself.You married while you are still a virgin.Thats a 4king lie.
Pain
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #38 on: March 09, 2007, 11:43 AM »

A girl may not have sex immediately with you because shes trying to prove a point. But, for 2.5 years? For a girl who is no virgin is very rare.

If she is a virgin, then we can say she is one of those rare disciplined girls id do anything to keep. But in your case, what happened to her discipline initially.

Okay, give me the regular answer, she made a mistake. "She has only being to bed with one guy all her life" " Oh that first guy sam broke her heart, she trusted him so much"

Brother that one na story o! Remember the 1st and 2nd laws of Okafor?

For you to be with her for almost three years with no sexual attraction is a problem.

Lets be sincere with ourselves, we humans secretly love sex even more than prayer. I wonder how prayerful the world would have been if it was sex that was the required devotional Shocked.

Please forgive me for my analogy. I don't mean to attack anyones sensibility, but my anger with most people is the way we "demonise" sex.

I'm not a proponent of "Premarital Sex but a realist. Most of us have and will willingly break the law if we come incontact with the right specimen.

Maybe You just aint her right Specimen Undecided
Abdblues (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #39 on: March 09, 2007, 11:52 AM »

@ Futy are you saying that it is not possible to marry while you are a virgin??common you should know better than that !
@ Topic For the fact that your GF is not a virgin makes her decision not to have sex with you a little bit questionable but i think it would be unwise to throw away a 2.5 year old relationship away because of that!!If you are sure she is not shagging someone else while denying you (You never can tell with all these babes)then such a woman is surely an asset because it means she has got some level of self control. You better go back to her! theere are not too many good ones out there i can assure you!!!
Then talking from a religious point of view, she is very much in order!!Whle you are---------
samy-young (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #40 on: March 09, 2007, 12:00 PM »

FaSHI HER
natasha (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #41 on: March 09, 2007, 12:03 PM »

@futy: I just looked up your profile and realised u might be 21, but u've got the brains of a 14 yr old. You don't know what your priorities in life are, you're still dependent on your parents.
I am proud of my past, present and what i've become. i can raise my head high and talk on sexual issues, because if u care to know, i was brought up a very disciplines person and my mum always says" because everyone does it, doesnt make it right:. At 24, i have a first class degree in business n law 4m a foriegn uni, in my final year as a PhD student also rounding up my internship with Microsoft UK, been a wife for 3 years and a mother for a few months now. I have no reason whatsoever to lie about my past, to u, to the original poster of this thread and to anybody. I am not only proud of who i am, my family, my husband is equally proud of me.
There are alot of guys who marry girls because of their attitudes, characters, charisma, potentials and looks. Remember, if u think u are old eneough to have sex, then u should be old enough to deal with the consequences. Once again, i think u are a kid, and u need to grow up.
Here's some advise from u, read alot of motivational books from people like Myles munroe, ben carson, mike murddock and listen to tapes from late Pst Mrs Bimbo Odukoya, Pst Mrs Faith Oyedepo: this people's messages are meant for people like u.
wiseguy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #42 on: March 09, 2007, 12:08 PM »


When I was in the University, i dated a girl for close to 2 years wout sex. I loved her so much that i respected her decision not to have sex and was willing to wait as long as possible. I was convinced then she truly loves me and she tells me how nice a guy I am. But that was until I found out she was actually cheating on me and she couldn't deny it when I confronted her. During my remaining days in the Uni, whenever am with a girl who am interested in and she starts telling me how nice I am, I will run and that will be the end of the r/ship. Do you blame me?

When I met my wife, I actually told myself she's going to be my wife and didn't pamper her like i did those before her. Infact, i did so many things purposely to discourage her. Then one day, after we got married, we were just gisting about r/ships and my wife said to me: "whenever a girl tells a guy how nice, good and gentle he is, that means the guy don they mess up". I told her she was just generalising but that cast me back memory lane and i told myself in my mind, wify could be right.

So there're always two sides to issues like this. It's a 50-50 chance of a wonderful r/ship or gruesome heartbreak. I will suggest you follow your heart, make a decision and accept whatever consequences. Experiences differs. I cannot tell you to do this or that or follow this rule because when it comes to love, there are no rules.
natasha (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #43 on: March 09, 2007, 12:10 PM »

it's unfortunate badchris that u choose to have a girlfriend because of sex. your girl is now a sex object. I hope u've got sisters who'll be treated same way as u are treating your girl
opsycute (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #44 on: March 09, 2007, 12:13 PM »

 If you're so desperate to get some, then for God's sake go get married. Cant u hold yourself?
Relationships r way beyond sex, if that is all u think it is, u have a lot to learn!!!
Rogo
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #45 on: March 09, 2007, 12:16 PM »

you are still a baby. baby only think of sex when it come to relationship. try to learn, ok.
Eseaba
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #46 on: March 09, 2007, 12:20 PM »

Just as taking tea with or without sugar is a matter of choice so is love with or without sex is a matter of choice. My guy says he can't do without sex then be it. Sex is good! Even all those babes that made comments can't do without it. Abi na lie I dey talk? The guy chose to zip up, will the guy wanted to zip off. This is parallel and incompartibility. O boy save the girl and help yourself.
But my guy , you try shay!!! 30 months !!1 Hope u no visit brothel sha. Play save!!! Cry Undecided Embarrassed
Abdblues (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #47 on: March 09, 2007, 12:48 PM »

I also think y'all are being unfair on the guy!!remember he has endured this for two and half years! Fingers are not equal and we all have varying degrees of self control/endurance. Sex is very much an important part of a relationship though not the only thing. It has been responsible for the breakdown of many marriages too!!
@ Eseaba: Your analogy is so funny but somewhat right, but not from a religious point of view!!
futy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #48 on: March 09, 2007, 01:03 PM »

Hey Bone-head.
                          Thanks for the advice but i would have loved to insulted the living me out of you but nufin do you.so*bounce*@natasha
kike001 (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #49 on: March 09, 2007, 01:30 PM »

y don't even no if her havin sex was a mistake or maybe she was raped or sumthin if u  ve 2 respect her opinion but if that is not da relationship for you den maybe u should leave her but if u love someone so much why would sumthin like that come in between u remember if u leve her u going to break her heart
angelchi (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #50 on: March 09, 2007, 01:39 PM »

You wan tell me say 4 that 2yrs u no sex another girl? mak u leave the poor girl jare if u fit wait u fashi, no be force.
odada (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #51 on: March 09, 2007, 01:42 PM »

My goodness all the raves and reviews over sex!but you guys avnt asked what the lovebirds do when together?asides talking?we all know they r not shagging?if for 2 years they av been  together and been making out then the guy should av asked his girlfriend y they arent aving sex?if he's so horny as he claims then i think thers more to it and hes not being totally honest?to say the truth most Nigeria gals that arent virgins r sexually active no matter what!if she aint shagging her boyfriend shes definately shagging someone elase and it could be that guilt thats making her stay away from him?how the hell did he know shes not  a virgin?if he hasnt shagged  her then she obviously told him and y don't she want to shag her boyfriend?If after 2 years of nos sex and they were going strong and all of a sudeen BAM he wants to start having sex then somethings definately wrong somewhere Huh
brownbaby (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #52 on: March 09, 2007, 01:48 PM »

Olagoke, you spoke well.

I'm sure you don't deserve it thats why she's not giving you. She must have noticed that's all u want from her.

Show her more love, and you wont ask for it before she gives you.

Leave her and you loose her.
Modups! (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #53 on: March 09, 2007, 01:51 PM »

i don't think u even love this girl
did u find out y she is not willing to sleep with u?
u just concluded that since she is not a virgin she should be giving it up to u  Shocked Shocked Shocked
u best check yourself bro  Tongue Tongue Tongue
haywhy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #54 on: March 09, 2007, 01:53 PM »

I'm sure you are begging fot it! Why not make her beg for it? Make it happen & let her just say "i don't know how it happened , it just happened
ChieFoH (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #55 on: March 09, 2007, 01:56 PM »

SHE HAS AIDS!!!1 I KNOW HER HER TYPE,  FREE HER SHE IS H.I.V POSITIVE
agnesoseka
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #56 on: March 09, 2007, 01:58 PM »

hahahahaha
swing4real (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #57 on: March 09, 2007, 02:07 PM »

I have said it time and time again here still i don´t understand why if someone come here for advice he or she end up receving insult.If you can´t him a good advice why he should not leave the girl then i advice you neglect his post.

Well dude i understand your pains but i think you should ask her the reason for delaying you right Grin.Have you done that? if not i will advice you to do that right away before leaving her ok? She must have reasons for not wanting to have sex with you.Suppose she have STD,HIV or a cause placed on her that if she have sex with anybody she and the partner will die Grin Have you thought of that dude? Maybe she love you alot and she don't you to die Cheesy


brownbaby (f)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #58 on: March 09, 2007, 02:20 PM »

Quote from: wiseguy on March 09, 2007, 12:08 PM

When I met my wife, I actually told myself she's going to be my wife and didn't pamper her like i did those before her. Infact, i did so many things purposely to discourage her. Then one day, after we got married, we were just gisting about r/ships and my wife said to me: "whenever a girl tells a guy how nice, good and gentle he is, that means the guy don they mess up".

Do you mean this whole thing works when the guy doesnt pamper you and does many things to discourage you, and the lady sees the guy as a hard guy, mean ,   Undecided excuse me.

There has to be enough ASSURANCE OF LOVE, ENOUGH COMMITMENT, CARE etc from the guy and nothing (sex inclusive ) will be witheld from him, he might not take it like he takes water everyday, but at least enough for the duo to enjoy the r/ship.

So, try giving her enough dosage of love, care, assurance, and "all other" things will be delivered to you.

ChieFoH (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #59 on: March 09, 2007, 02:26 PM »

@TOPIC
on the real guy just find out the REAL REASON why she does'nt want to do it with you, It's definately kind of wierd tho esp because she's not a V.

i have a little secret i want to tell u guys

@natasha
don't mean to be  rude but i don't really think it was really necessary Undecided to brag about your life achievements on this thread, even though the guy was petulant, congrats tho seems your living the life!!!!
meanwhile please advice me on what u and your hubby used to do for two years instead of sex, i'm an xtian and i need the advice.

MY LIL SECRET
me n  my baby have been together for 4 YEARS and no sex Wink, noone knows, even my jnr sis does'nt believe whenever i tell her
Blow (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #60 on: March 09, 2007, 02:43 PM »

Mr brotha

True Love waits for marriage before "doing it"

Sex is good, but you cannot handle it until
you are married.

if you cannot hold yur body,
it doesnt make yur girl useless because she can,

That is, if she's not "doing it" with any other
person,

Be patient with her, And try to work on your
power of self-control,
Sex is not everything there is about a r/ship.

And if you still can't hold on,
then follow yur heart but don't do anything nasty.
wiseguy (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #61 on: March 09, 2007, 02:44 PM »

Quote from: brownbaby on March 09, 2007, 02:20 PM
Do you mean this whole thing works when the guy doesnt pamper you and does many things to discourage you, and the lady sees the guy as a hard guy, mean ,   Undecided excuse me.

I do not mean anything and I did not conclude or generalize. If you read through my post, i emphatically stated that experiences differs. Different strokes for different folks. What worked for someone else might not work for me. So, don't pick out a section of people's post and start putting meanings into it.

@post

I don't think its fair to abuse and insult this guy. He merely asked for advice but he's getting insults instead. methinks he loves the girl and that's why he wants our advice. I will implore those who want to advice to tend more to the positive, try to make the r/ship work rather than otherwise.
Blow (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #62 on: March 09, 2007, 02:46 PM »

@natasha
You are sure a model!
But don't pull others down for failing
where u excel

@ChieFoH
I think you should tell us
the secret behind yur secret
How did you "not do it"
for 4 years!
odada (m)
Re: Of What Use Is My Girlfriend If I Can't Have Sex With Her?
« #63 on: March 09, 2007, 02:48 PM »

@chiefoh
that 1 na record breaker oh!plz whoever started this thread should go and sleep we av a new king on the red carpet double badshizy Grin Grin Grin
@topic
I think we should start a new thread?how long av u gone without sleeping with your spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend? Grin let me start 10minutes! Grin Grin Grin okay that wasnt funny :Dor was it Wink
 How To Know When A Man Loves You  Ladies: Would You Marry a Younger Man?  [Kissing] Your Partner Doesn't Know How To Kiss  Page 2
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