Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?

A Member? Please Login  
type your username and password to login
Date: August 30, 2008, 03:46 PM
235042 members and 135204 Topics
Latest Member: MandySingle
Nairaland [Nigerian Forum] Home Help Search Who is currently online? Login Register
Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Culture  |  Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
Pages: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) Go Down Send this topic Notify of replies
Author Topic: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?  (Read 3211 views)
Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #224 on: May 08, 2007, 09:38 PM »

sharrap jare. I am still waiting for where I said otherwise, Ikomi
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #225 on: May 08, 2007, 09:51 PM »

Quote from: Red_Lips on May 08, 2007, 09:38 PM
I am still waiting for where I said otherwise, Ikomi

Read your old posts and u would find the answer. You wan hear from my mouth. hahahahahahaha.

Dat one na deadi body get accident yeppaaaaa.

No be my mouth. heyheyheyheeeeee  Grin
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #226 on: May 08, 2007, 09:54 PM »

Ameromo i being think say una hold one position for the discussion oohhh.

Anyways, unfortunately the story heat up no doubt. But in an unexpected direction.

So wetin we they talk now na Racismmmm or Black brotha. Thank goodness am green.


Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin

I don laugh die here.
Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #227 on: May 08, 2007, 10:08 PM »

So in other words, I never did.

Thanks for clearing that up.  Smiley
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #228 on: May 08, 2007, 10:14 PM »

well I guess their question is if they are going to look for someone else who isnt a loser(one "o" Btw), why not look for another black woman who is "up there and will help them become stronger" instead of giving up on their race entirely.

Madam Red_Lips explain that. It even has race in it.

And let me warn u watever u have to say don't insult me ooohhh.

Otherwise.
GNature (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #229 on: May 08, 2007, 10:20 PM »

Quote from: Ikomi on May 08, 2007, 09:51 PM

Now Red _Lips for your Information I come from the beautiful good land of Darfur, In Sudan, where there is a good number of ethnic Igbos.


You are from Darfur in Sudan ? ROFLMAO  Grin   Dude you are not serious.
neelsel (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #230 on: May 08, 2007, 10:41 PM »

@Gnature am good o( but I may have to desist from using Nigerian Lingo  Grin Cheesy Grin Grin)

@topic,
Mr. Darfur, maybe we can hook up. Have been planning on spending some time there,  Smiley Grin
AmerOmoge (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #231 on: May 08, 2007, 10:41 PM »

This is my take on the whole thing, Dispite you not giving me respect I will show you that Red-Lips,  I only ask that if you going to tell people what I say say it right,

At no point did I ever say, recommend or suggest Black women lie on your back and let black men walk all over you, Not ever, At no point did I suggest nor recommend they waste their time on losers and low life.  My words is that as Black women we always have your back, There are loads of educated black men who can't find work and his woman holds him down, as many of them same men once they find their ground leave them for white women or others,  The women that may take them back with open arms does not have to be that woman, But didn't think I had to break it down that far.  That woman could be another black woman, his sister, his mother who allows him to come back in their home tell he gets his footing, and at times it may be that same back women and most often she take him back for her children sake, She may be a fool but she knows without a father in the home her daughter is more likely to be pregnant before the age of 20.  As far as losers and the sort white women can have each and everyone of them, matter of fact the black community may consider paying them a lump sum per loser.  

Most Everything I posted was regarding the impact this has on the community culture.  I hope you know that your are free to say as you wish, I say it to show respect, but am not afford the same.  No need to take anything personal but I ask you not to infer or imply that at any point I suggest Black woman put the esteem below that of their man.  Please don't ever misquote me like that.

Just incase yall need a refresher on what I been talking about here you go:

Quote
1.  Let me make it simple. . .

It is about black menboth African and African -American men marrying non black womenleaving black women in a marriage squeeze where they are not getting married for the three reasons identified in the article. . .

My question isis this really a problem for Naija women. . . or just Naija and other Black women abroad i.e. in the States and the UK?

Which leaves me wondering what the fascination is with being with women of other races. . .

@whitelexi pleaseit is not equal rights that did itbefore we point the finger we must first look at selfask yourself how long would you put up with the typical treatment that men give women before you decide enough is enough and assert yourself, need and desires. . .

Men are not the only humans that have wants and needs and just like when you are not satisfied with something you respond to it either by making a change or letting it be. . . compromise or whatever. . .

Respect is earn not givenand even if respect is given once lost it needs to be earned. . .

2.  this not to say that we are better than any other woman but that we are your other half. . . your neck if you willwhen the world degrades you and call you names as your neck I help you hold your head high and give you the strength it takes to face this cruel discriminatory world another day . . .

I nag you because I care, because I want the best from youbecause this is what I pledge to give you. . . I wont allow you to slip because the world wont and I will only be doing you a disservice if I don't tell you the truth regardless to how much it hurts. . .

3.  I just wish they could see eternal hope and strength within us,
4.  This is exactly why started this threadbecause I think black men need to re-evaluate the potential damage they are doing to "the black family" etc. . .

5.  Well if i want oneany piece of one. . . that I can havebut I am searchingseeking to build an empire with one and that requires more than settling for a piece of a man for the sake of saying I have oneoops i think that's for a different thread o!

6.  Spoilt it has to start with black people learn or relearning to love there blackness it is must O!!!
7. How about yall take some responsibility for abandoning your responsibilities to the blaclk family, culture and community. It is not you who are left raising children and working two jobs to make ends meet. No it is us, and when the white man wont employ you who is that has your back. Lets try taking responsibility for what we do.

8.  True this problem been growing for a long time o! Colonization maybe but what we need is to take a stance against it. How we going to get better when so many of us hate the skin we in cause it is hard. Hell who ever promised you it was going to be easy. Stop taking the easy way out. That's what make black women so strong we don't have a way out. the world rejects us and our men do too because it too much hard work.

9. Stop believing that being accepted by white people that your life will be so much easier. Make them respect you, by respecting yourself and culture. Stop denying yourself "Tiger W.) who's a lost cause, I pray for his father. That's another topic for another day.

Ikomi no need to bate me into a battle with Red-Lips, I have my opinion she has her, I am not afraid or chicken to speak my mind, nor to disagree, but misquoting me and suggesting I am lonely when she don't know me from Ann, is a place I choose not to go any further with her or anyone else on nairland. As I have said a thousand times we are all entitled to our opinions I am not asking NOT A ONE OF YOU to adopt mine.  I am confident enough in my viewpoint to STAND ALONE if I have to.  

When I refer to the black community I refer to the ENTIRE BLACK/AFRICAN diaspora, From Africa to the Islands to the Americas.

Like my signature say I am who YOU think I am but who I be will ALWAYS be ME.
 




Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #232 on: May 08, 2007, 10:48 PM »

Re: Ameromoge
did I say that they should lie down for anyone?  I said that is what should be discussed. I said instead of them looking at themselves and how they do their thing and the kind crap they accept from their "brothers", they are too busy whining about who he's dating.

Are you Nigerian? If so, which part?
Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #233 on: May 08, 2007, 10:50 PM »

I said that is how most of these woman who have a problem with this situation are thinking, Ikomi. Hence the part of "THEIR QUESTION". Excuse you for not understanding English. Maybe I'll ask Osisi to translate it to Igbo for you.
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #234 on: May 08, 2007, 10:54 PM »

 Grin  Wink  Cheesy  Kiss Who has the last laugh.

Whether I understand english oohh or I don't understand english. We read it all.

No be only me read am. Red _Lips u wan ruuuuuunnnnn.

lol

Una go kill me here wit laughter.

Red_Lips and Ameromoge.

Keep the heat on.

ikamefa (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #235 on: May 08, 2007, 10:58 PM »

na so so yinglish persin dey read for this thread!

if your own don better no come put sand sand for people garri in here oh!

Racism my big beautiful ass  Tongue Grin Grin
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #236 on: May 08, 2007, 10:58 PM »

You were in support of the question Red _Lips stop trying to bail out.

And enough of your insult ohhh.

I go show u ohhhhhhhhhhh. ok

Angry
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #237 on: May 08, 2007, 11:00 PM »

Ike6 which angle u dey come from?  Grin
AmerOmoge (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #238 on: May 08, 2007, 11:01 PM »

Quote from: Ikomi on May 08, 2007, 10:54 PM
Grin Wink Cheesy Kiss Who has the last laugh.

Whether I understand english oohh or I don't understand english. We read it all.

No be only me read am. Red _Lips u wan ruuuuuunnnnn.

lol

Una go kill me here wit laughter.

Red_Lips and Ameromoge.

Keep the heat on.



As I said I will not be bated, I will let my words speak for themselves. Grin Grin Grin
Those who agree speak up and those who don't do the same. If everyone thought like me then we would not have a debate here, and this topic would not be getting all this attention, So in my opinion my job is done Grin Grin Grin #4 Cool
blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #239 on: May 08, 2007, 11:01 PM »

@ ikomi
was it not u who made fun of me for not understanding igbo    Angry
ikamefa (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #240 on: May 08, 2007, 11:02 PM »

asko oh  Cheesy


Quote from: Ikomi on May 08, 2007, 11:00 PM
Ike6 which angle u dey come from? Grin

you don't need to know   Grin
Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #241 on: May 08, 2007, 11:03 PM »

Apparently English is optional in his village school. Poor kid doesnt know the difference between support and asking a question.   Cry
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #242 on: May 08, 2007, 11:04 PM »

Quote from: blue-sky on May 08, 2007, 11:01 PM
@ ikomi
was it not u who made fun of me for not understanding igbo Angry

So wetin u wan talk. Make una no make me loose temper here oohh.
GNature (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #243 on: May 08, 2007, 11:04 PM »

Quote from: neelsel on May 08, 2007, 10:41 PM

@Gnature am good o( but I may have to desist from using Nigerian Lingo Grin Cheesy Grin Grin)


@neesel

Haba, why stop using the lingo ? You use am well well You used it very well  Grin

Get used to using the lingo so you'll be well prepared to communicate with your future Nigerian in-laws  Cheesy
blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #244 on: May 08, 2007, 11:04 PM »

@ topic
what is wrong with black men dating non black women?
why are  most black women more in favour of keeping to the race?
Red_Lips (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #245 on: May 08, 2007, 11:07 PM »

Because what else will they have to whine about?
blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #246 on: May 08, 2007, 11:07 PM »

Quote from: Red_Lips on May 08, 2007, 11:03 PM
Apparently English is optional in his village school. Poor kid doesnt know the difference between support and asking a question.   Cry

i understand what your saying, but when i don't understand igbo, he goes and insults me in igbo.

blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #247 on: May 08, 2007, 11:09 PM »

Quote from: Red_Lips on May 08, 2007, 11:07 PM
Because what else will they have to whine about?

sometimes i wonder if the black men are running away from the black women who love to moan about everything Grin
Neish (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #248 on: May 08, 2007, 11:09 PM »

maybe blackmen feel black women are not bringing it like they used to
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #249 on: May 08, 2007, 11:11 PM »

Quote from: blue-sky on May 08, 2007, 11:07 PM
i understand what your saying, but when i don't understand igbo, he goes and insults me in igbo.

Quote from: Red_Lips on May 08, 2007, 11:03 PM
Apparently English is optional in his village school. Poor kid doesnt know the difference between support and asking a question. Cry

Na me una wan face, the only luck wey una get be say I no fit insult person.

But Red_Lips if u get strength ohhh Ameromo dey wait u.
blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #250 on: May 08, 2007, 11:16 PM »

Quote from: Ikomi on May 08, 2007, 11:11 PM
Na me una wan face, the only luck wey una get be say I no fit insult person.


i am not trying to cause an argument with. You probably cannot remember what u sed to me, so i will forget about it. Grin
friends Embarrassed
so u are from Sudan? or r u Nigerian? Undecided
ikamefa (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #251 on: May 08, 2007, 11:16 PM »

Quote from: Red_Lips on May 08, 2007, 11:07 PM
Because what else will they have to whine about?

are you white? if you are i need my oclometer quickly
GNature (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #252 on: May 08, 2007, 11:18 PM »

Quote from: blue-sky on May 08, 2007, 11:16 PM

so u are from Sudan? or r u Nigerian? Undecided

ROFLMAO   Grin Grin

gotta love this thread. God bless Nairaland  Grin
Ikomi (m)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #253 on: May 08, 2007, 11:18 PM »

Red_Lips u were all for black brotha wit black sistas don't try to play smart. As 4 Ika 6 I feel u. Ameromo, don't let Red_Lips get away wit it. Finally Blue_Sky If I see u writing in Igbo  Angry again. Let me just leave it there.
blue-sky (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #254 on: May 08, 2007, 11:22 PM »

Quote from: GNature on May 08, 2007, 11:18 PM
ROFLMAO   Grin Grin

gotta love this thread. God bless Nairaland  Grin

did he not say he was from Dafur in sudanHuh Wink

@ikomi
when did i write in igbo Huh
AmerOmoge (f)
Re: Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?
« #255 on: May 08, 2007, 11:22 PM »

Quote from: blue-sky on May 08, 2007, 11:04 PM
@ topic
what is wrong with black men dating non black women?
why are most black women more in favour of keeping to the race?


Its about self preservation, self-love vs. self hate, culture and community?  As long as that can be maintained then most of my concerns are voided.  That's one of the reasons I jokingly said it's okay for a black woman to have white mans baby because you are what your mother is!!!

But there is plenty else to whine about as Redlips put it, Money, Education, Alcoholism, Infidelity, shall I whine go on?

I am done here, the topic has been given its due attention, not need for me to go further

Ikomi you are horrible, Na fight? no be me and you!
 Why Is Nigerian Society So Damn Corrupt?   Igbo And Yoruba Marriages?  How Culture affects Marriage Among Educated (westernized) Nigerians  Page 2
Pages: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) Go Up Send Topic to Friend by E-mail Reply 
Google
 
Web www.nairaland.com
Sections: TV/Movies (2) Music/Radio (2) Celebrities Job Talk Jobs/Vacancies (2) Career Talk Romance Books Politics Sports Fashion Travel
Health Schooling Religion General(2) Business Webmaster Programming Computers Phones Cars & Trucks

Links: Page1 Page2 Page3 Page4 Page5 Page6 Page7 Page8 Page9 Page10

Nairaland is owned by Oluwaseun Osewa
Nairaland Forum | Powered by SMF 1.0.12.
© 2001-2005, Lewis Media. All Rights Reserved.