My Uncle Raped Me. How Can I Punish Him?

i don;t really know where 2 post this, either family or romance, anyways, nine years ago, my mom was called in own hometown that her father was really sick and her attention was needed, the only person she trust me  is my uncle, there is something about that guy i don;t really like, he act strange, before my mom left, my uncle came over, she explain the situation back home, and he said, there will be no problem taking care of me, 9'o clock that sunday i told him, i have 2 go to bed, he said he won;t let me unless, i take my shower, i told this fool, i never take a shower, before goin 2 bed before, he said, he doesn;t care, that i just have 2 no matter what, so i decide, so he could get of my case, after takin the shower, this guy said he have 2 dress for me, i told him I'm ten years old and i can take care of myself, he said he doesn;t care, what i do when my mom is here, but when his here i have 2 do  it his way, as he was dressin for me, i notice he was touchin my private part and my breast 2 much, i went 2 my room and lock the door, in the middle of the night i heard something, it was him again, the next thing i know, he was inside of me, i scream, i yelll, but at night in nigeria, nobody will answer u, when he was done, he said if i tell, he will make sure, my head is been takin off, when my mom got back the next day, i put up the courage 2 tell her, i was shock by her answer, he lover her brother more than than she loves me, she said "Baby you are 2 young 2 be thinkin about sex right now",

Now nine years later, (I'm in usa), I'm one of the people that always believe in sex before marriage.(i never have sex after that day), but this ass hole as takin my JOY away from me, and i notice that there is no man in the world that could touch me that i won;t freeze up, and when i sleep, i still remember what happen nine years ago, and this man, right now his with his family back, livin happily with his family, but I'm not, i can;t have a boyfriend, because i don;t want 2 relive the situation again, and I'm not even over the first one,

as of now, all i want 2 do is pay this man the way he did 2 me, so I'm lettin u guys decide how

awww that is jsut so sad i can't believe ur mum sed what she sed as well just try tellin her agin i mean u r grown up now confornt ur mum that is what is her problem u r tellin her the truth like if she can't trust her own daughter who else can she trust try tellin ur dad as well but that can be embarrassing anyway just confornt ur mum about what is brother did
good luck or if this give u peace of mind just ask ur uncle y he did it?? n let him no u will never forgive him he migt say sorry but i guess that wint change anythin 

Sweet heart, I felt very sad reading your post. I believe there are a lot of people in Nigeria who have gone through this emotional experience. Most of the time, they are either ignored, belittled or blamed . I am very glad you chose to share this incident. I wish more women would come forward and share their stories. I wish more laws would be enacted to severly punish this aggressive behavior targeted at our future leaders. I am very sorry to hear about your story but I'm going to briefly tell you what I think you should do . I believe you may have passed through the process of self-hate ( blaming self), anger and you are now at a stage when revenge is first and foremost on your mind. It is normal to go through this stages . Your childhood was stolen away from you by a child molestor.
I would recommend this book to you by T. D Jakes "Woman thou art loosed" , I would also recommend that you go to Paula White's website. she was abused as a child. There are a lot of resources which you may find beneficial.

I would encourage you to punish your uncle by forgiving him. As far as I am concerned , he still has a hold on you. He shall continually have a hold on you until you can forgive him .
I would not say "forget about it" . that would be very unrealistic. But I would encourage you to forgive him, and in remembering it , you can say to your self "yes , he  molested me", but here I am still standing. I shall make it.

I would have  encouraged you to confront your mom, and your uncle if they were in the states. This sounds ridiculous but America is a free country, freedom of speech , human rights. The right to be heard. But considering the lawlessness in Nigeria somethings are better left unsaid , just for your safety.

Also , I would recommend that you open up to a potential lover about the events of the past . I know that an understanding spouse would be ready to work with you.

I would also encourage you to turn  your blessing to a curse. It would be great if you can use your experience to help other young women in similar situations.

         Above all , I would encouage you to get help. My heart bleeds , I mean bleeds daily because of the way we blam victims of sexual assualt. Seriously , the "woman" is to blame. what has an innocent 10 year old done . My heart also bleeds because of the way sexual molestation is handled in NIgeria. The victims are silenced and may be scared for life. But honey there is healing.And it needs to start from you mind. YOu chose to forgive, you chose to value yourself as a person, you chose to know it is no fault of yours , you chose to stay positive about the future.
I can go on and on, but let me stop here.

I think the first thing you should do is to seek some [/b]THERAPY
this would help you get your feelings in check don't worry about getting a boy friend right now just get your self right.
discussing this situation with your parents might help but you know how our parents are they might blame you for what happened or call you a liar.
Getting revenge on your uncle wouldn't solve anything because the damage is done.
The best thing in my oppinion would be to cut him off. He, his wife and his children have absolutly nothing to do with them.
Dwelling on an issue such as this is giving your uncle the upper hand in your life if you ignore his family you win.

[b]Get Therapy its good for the soul

 am sorry gurl . ur story is really sad. i wouldn't tell u to do anythin to him. i think the only thin u can do is to forget that it ever happened. i know it's really heard to forget because the feelings still comes back but u just have to and move on with ur life.


If it was me, amma blackmail the s h i t out of him. amma destroy his life, his family like s h i t.  That's a wrong advice don't try it plzzzzzzzzzzz cause come to think of it, if u shoot him or do anythin to hurt him, it's goin to affect ur family too cause ur mom is his sister (i guess it's biological). Anyway my point is that, just forget the past and focus on ur future and ur generation.

my sister it is sad to hear your story but killing him or harming him will just add more to your problem. you will live the rest of your life thinking of those two things (his action and yours). this is the best thing to do, its hard but you just have to do it. FORGIVE HIM,  IT WILL REALLY HELP YOU.

AND AS FOR THE ISSUE OF NO GUY ,  ITS A MIND THING MY SISTER SO please LET IT GO.

don't blame the inbicle may be he was instructed by  his pastor to do that, civilised christians

things like are yet to happen to you, Hypocrates, Hahahahahha