Wife And Mother-in-law Bitter Relationship. Why?

I sholda commented but its all thrown 2 d ladies, so, 

The bible says the man shall leave his Father and Mother and cling to his wife. Emphasis on leave and cling. If my husband does not understand that then there must be something wrong.

I have no problem with him having a relationship with his ma but he needs to understand that with time I will become the woman in all levels and respects in his life and he should not fight that. or it could look like I am just a mess body with no friendship watsoeva becos he gets that from his ma.

@aisha2

who's da question directed at?

For the ladies, a real man will treasure you like he treasure his mama, a real man will love and respect you just like he does with his mama, if he cant, there is a problem there, it is a great and a wonderful thing for the man to love his mother, cos regarldess, mother will be mother, however, the man has to be the man and know where to draw the line btw the mother and the wife, hope he wont have to do that, i so much would love a situation where my Mother will be closer to my wife than me, that they do things together, talk and have fine together, that will make me so happy, however, if that is not possible, i have to make my wife know that she is the best thing in my life and let momma know that i am no more that lil' boy that she used to breastfeed, the day i marry, the day momma need to realize that i have a woman in life that i have to cheris, hold and love reagrdless, now that doesnt mean the wife has to disrespect the momma, and neither would i take nonesense from momma towards wifey, cant we all just get along

@ NaJa go to www.menlikerhino.org

23,and who are u?

Joey, if u think about it, most of teh reasons why the wife dont treat you right when the mother -in-law is around is the fear of going wrong, cos mother in law always see something wrong in da wife, no woman can be good enuf for teh son, as long as the mother is concern, but the man has to learn to love the mother and the wife in a different way, tyhe wife is now your mother, sister, best friend and all to you, while your mother is just your mother, i do agree with you, mother suffered for you to be what you arem, however, she shuld be happy that you are now married with your own family, as the man, do all possible to make sure they get so much along, set both up on dates, send them to dinners, and do all possible, paint the woman to your mother as gold and let your mother know that once she interfere, you will be offended, let her know you ave made your choice, and bai bai to mummy, u wanna be with your wifey, and plssssssssssssssssssssssss dont run to momma when wife is wrong

Seun, there are situations where the mother-in-law and teh wife will have to stay together for a short period of time, for example, you reside abroad and your mother wanna come and visit you and you married, will u lodge the mother in a friend's house or an hotel cos u married, so better to make the foundation right

fawwby, dont be too sure, i sure do have my bad side, 

@ $$Rhino
I totally agree with u, maybe that's why Naja Haje wants 2 find a man like u. Although its easier said than done, I concurr u've got a good concept on how 2 handle a mother/daughter inlaw affair. I only hope u truely live up to dis concept.

  u make me laugh $$Rhino, only pray that d both of them won't be shopaholics.
Besides momma need 2 understand d money isn't meant 4 her but 4 d nuclear family, though u have 2 give her considerations at times, momma also need 2 realise she's got her own hubby (ie dad) who'll provide 4 her shopping.

@topic
i think it all has to do with affection and loyalty. to be sincere women have a lot of issues, especially when two women are involved fighting for one thing, which is unnecessary but cannot be avoided most of the time.

 to the both women it has to do with struggling for the upper hand where the guy is concerned. the mother wants to prove he is still her little boy and should always obey everything she says. which gets the wife annoyed most of the times, the wife wants to prove its her husband and partner and she holds a place in his heart, so she can have a say in the decisions he makes.

it also has to do with each woman thinking the other woman wants to take the whole attention away from her. because when the man gets married, his attention becomes divided, there is competition for attention, which creates a feeling of insecurity. usually it starts from the mother in law's end. because she realizes it not her alone again. her son has a wife. and so he has to dedicate his time to his wife also. which makes her feel a bit annoyed and jealous.

 sometimes its just a play on the imaginations of the both women, they create an unsecured feeling that the other party does not like her, once this feeling is created, it makes it difficult for an effective communication to take place.

its a silent battle that has been there and would be there for a long time to come.