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ehie007 (m)
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Is this stroy for real. if so, the problem is not that she is not a virgin, the problem is that she lied, a very heavy long lie. if it was me, she leaves, even if we had just married 2 mins ago.  |
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April22 (f)
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if it was me, she leaves, even if we had just married 2 mins ago. Even if you both own the house? |
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lawuyi (m)
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Tough one ooooo
You know the problem is not particularly her virginity. Most guys have done some dirt before marriage even if reformed later. Thing is she lied to him about it and there was no particular reason to do so.
Did the guy say he wanted to marry a virgin at all cost? If that's why she did it then she deceived him.
Was the guy putting pressure on her to go to bed with him? If that's why i can only assume she'd slept with some guy(s) in her past and had made a decision to stop till she got married (i don't even want to think she might have been sleeping with someone while dating the guy).
Either way, what she did constitutes a breah of trust. It could have been avoided so easily and was so unnecessary so it begs the question, If she can hide that what else did she hide.
It's a really tough one because there aint no divorce for a Christian (that is what the good book says). They'll have to live with each other, the guy will have to forgive her. They'll both have to ask for God's guidance and wisdom in the issue.
But e go hard ooooooooo
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$$Rhino
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sad to blv that we still have men with shallow mind that has brain fart, because she is no virgin, she lied to you and all those Mushin olosha excuses, you will kick her out, i am truely sorry our ladies oh, because if these are what they will marry, so sad.
Poster, she has lied to you, she is your wife now, you love her, forgive her, and move on
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amaikama (m)
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All this while, you have been faithful while she is fledging around with the holy hole to some one else and you are still living with her?  please, send her back to her mama!!! fish brains want to tell tortoise how wise she is |
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COLLINSibe (m)
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WELL I MUS TELL You THAT
98 PERCENT OF THE WE HAVE TODAY
ARE NOT VIRGIN.
IT'S ONLY A SHAME IF THE GIRL/LADY HAS BIN HOLD HER SELF FROM THE MAN
UNTO WAYA LEVELS.
THE MANIPUL SHOULD JUST TAKE HEART.
IT'S ONE OF (GIRLS) THEIR WAY OF LIVING.
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ifyalways (f)
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it just happened to someone i knew.  but theres was just before the traditional marriage.well elders and friends of the guy talked to the guy,but i guess it was difficult for him but he did finally went on with the marriage. its difficult but i just have to take it like that thats if i am a guy :Plet he who is not guilty cast the first stone.  |
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dellynash (f)
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hello dear the lady played a smart one on you, reconsider her , its kind of hard but try and let her apologise for her actions.
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playmate (f)
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der re so many stories so hard 2 blive.that girl STUPID no b small.didn't she know d guy wuld finally find out?some ladies re desperate sha,wu knows mayb she herself didn't no she wasn't a virgin.sorry 4 d guy he's already married 2 her so he'll jst av 2 accept it nd continue wit d marriage.leaving her wuld b absurd.
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QUE`SHIQUE (f)
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I think "men" need to re-educate themself thoroughly on the concept of "virginity". Not bleeding during the first penetration does not say you are not a "virgin". It's quite popular that once you bleed on your first penile entry you are a virgin,but what "men" need to digest is that there are strenous exercises that can tear the "hymen" seeing that is extremely thin. Women who use "tampon" another form of sanitary protection which the females have to insert in the vagina can also break the hymen. Men please do educate yourself with this "hymen" facts, the hymen is very thin or fragile hence rigourous exercises and tampon insertion can break it's structure. When a man is full educated about the female anatomy, he does not behave as if he is unlearnt or uneducated. Please do understand that if your female was quite active in school situation like the above mentioned will occur. For heaven sake if the woman says she is a virgin why dispute her stance. Are you jealous because you aren't?  |
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Odogiyon (m)
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Calling family meeting will only make things worst. They will never forget and that will be a laughing stock later.There is no body without a shady part,but they(family leaders) will never expose theirs. If she lost it through sport and stuff,you'll know and if she lost it through sex,you'll also know because of the tightness and pain. But if i discover its through sex,i will never send her packing,i'll rather purnish her through other means and make her sorry for the deed.  |
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yimiton (f)
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This is not a question of virginity but a question of lies, integrity and trust.
This is really bad.
I wonder how she could put that on her mind and still get married to you.
I won't advice divorce because it's going to totally tear both of you apart but then, I really don't know what to advice on this. Sorry Bro, this too big for me.
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latent (m)
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she did not confess to any wrong doing, or did she
if she does sports or plays rough play like kick football/ride biycycle
with her brothers it is possible say de thing don tear by mistake
some girls are big u know and if the guy thing come small , piam e don enter
make una de ask for facts well well o
if say she do am na sharp girl and the boy na ode
afterall who want virgin, i prefer woman wey don do am come retire
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damkollins (m)
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There is no crime in her loosing her Virginity for whatever reason that might have caused it but she really hurt the guy by claiming to be a Virgin.
All she had to do was to tell her man to wait for them to get married before sex comes in(which is understandable) and not that she is a Virgin.It's really a bad situation/circumstance to find one's self in.To me,it's not the fact that she's not a Virgin that'll make it painfull but the fact that she LIED all along(Afterall,he must have loved her first before the issue of Virginity came up).
This V of a thing is really turning relationships upside down and I just wish we can do without talking about it again!
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Warfy Boy (m)
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if u go butik go buy shirt because when u dey inside d shop d cloth fine, but as you reach house/outside u kom discover say na the lite 4 inside butik deceive u, u kno go return d shirt bak, if dt woman can lie about such tin, she can kill as well, be gone frm me
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hubgirl (f)
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the only crime she committed was to lie to him PERIOD!!; from the sound of d story, i strongly believe that he doesnt even deserve her virginity <as with every man anyway!> getting your wife's virginity is a priviledge NOT A RIGHT! most guys are not virgins when they get married;, they would have slept with girls everywhere ; then they want their wife to be a virgin???  anyways back to the topic;, he has to forgive her and move on with d marriage ; if she was an easy girl she would have had sex with him before d weddin ,but SHE DID NOT. its obvious that she may regret having sex in d past and thats why she went in to celibacy until marriage<and lied>. Furthermore; maybe she lied about her virginity because she didnt want him to force her into premarital-sex again, as the poster said he did ask her for sex and her excuse is what made him back-off i know a lot of girls who had sex while in secondary sch , but now they've learnt from their mistakes and have abstained; wishing for their virginity back; to me this is a classic example; he has to forgive her for lying! |
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ohwofasa (m)
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what about it?
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blueband (m)
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This happened to a friend of mine.Exactly the same situation and the marriage packed up for this sole reason.They had dated for 3 years and she insisted on giving her "virginity" to him on their wedding day.Well,he found out she wasn't a virgin and her reply-"my mother told me to tell you I was a virgin or else you won't marry me".She suceeded in getting married to the guy,but it didn't last.They divorced less than 3 months after the wedding.
Some people are just plain schemers and stupid.Why lie or hide something to get married,thinking that once you reveal it in marriage you will be forgiven?
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odiaseo (m)
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it depicts the kind of society we live in! whereby chastity is no longer regarded and abstinence until marriage is thrown in the bin. A woman should save her self for marriage and not mess around, it isn't a privilege to take your wife's virginity it is a right. The same applies to men too.
It used to be a disgrace to the family of the bride if it is discovered that she isn't a virgin after the wedding. The man had to provide evidence that she was after the first night. I'm sure the mother of the girl understood this, that's why she asked her to lie.
Honesty, trust and integrity should be the foundation of any relationship and definitely marriage. If the girl can foolishly lie to get married, what else has she been lying about. I don't think she can be trusted.
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spoilt (f)
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This happened to a friend of mine.Exactly the same situation and the marriage packed up for this sole reason.They had dated for 3 years and she insisted on giving her "virginity" to him on their wedding day.Well,he found out she wasn't a virgin and her reply-"my mother told me to tell you I was a virgin or else you won't marry me".She suceeded in getting married to the guy,but it didn't last.They divorced less than 3 months after the wedding.
Some people are just plain schemers and stupid.Why lie or hide something to get married,thinking that once you reveal it in marriage you will be forgiven?
he married her because he thought she had a hymen?  |
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debosky (m)
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Thats not the point spoilt - TRUST is. If someone can deceive you for 3 whole years, what else could she have hidden?
Once there is no trust, there really isn't any point remaining in the relationship. Constant suspicion and distrust would ruin anything else they had, just like odiaseo said.
I'd rather marry someone who has slept with 10 men and has the courage and strength of character to tell me, than marry someone who would lie to me about such a thing and possibly would do worse.
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lastdonty (m)
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wetin do u? ,shey because your girl no b virgin again u come ditch am?.E no good ohh,what of all d girlz u don disflower? Ty. 
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spoilt (f)
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Thats not the point spoilt - TRUST is. If someone can deceive you for 3 whole years, what else could she have hidden?
Once there is no trust, there really isn't any point remaining in the relationship. Constant suspicion and distrust would ruin anything else they had, just like odiaseo said.
I'd rather marry someone who has slept with 10 men and has the courage and strength of character to tell me, than marry someone who would lie to me about such a thing and possibly would do worse.
if she knew he would be ok if she told the truth do you think she would have lied? she 'gave' him what she knew he wanted to hear. Lots of guys will continue to be deceived. |
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The Sly
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if that happens to me  . . . . .ill just have to forgive her and she'll stay with me but!! i will NOT!! touch her for da next 10 good solid years! (with that she'll kno wuz up) |
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spoilt (f)
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if that happens to me . . . . .ill just have to forgive her and she'll stay with me but!! i will NOT!! touch her for da next 10 good solid years! (with that she'll kno wuz up) guys baffle me. |
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The Sly
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guys baffle me. those who knew what i meant have already grabbed the point! i wont use all of me mouth to say it. . . . (no touchin for 10 years geddit ) |
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spoilt (f)
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those who knew what i meant have already grabbed the point! i wont use all of me mouth to say it. . . . (no touchin for 10 years geddit )i understood you clearly. that's why i say i am puzzled by guys' points of view most times. |
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The Sly
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i understood you clearly. that's why i say i am puzzled by guys' points of view most times. yeah right! (thats how its supposta!) . . . . . |
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salinco (m)
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:-x :-x :-x :-x :-x
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sagacious (f)
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He should not put what god has joined together in assunder, so, come what may happen ,he should bear it that way.
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AJITERU
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I greet all of you my people. I really appreciate your contributions on this particular topic.Please I would like to use this oppotunity to help me answer this question that has been bothering me since all this wile. The question is, Is't possible for a lady to loss her virginity without having sex? I really need your contribution on this.
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