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spoilt (f)
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yeah. i came to the conclusion a long time ago that sex is best had within the confines of marriage. nothing like a man who is commited to you and cares about what happens to you after he gets dressed and leaves!
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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lol right after you got married eh? 
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omoge (f)
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Spoilt, you are right.
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spoilt (f)
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lol right after you got married eh?  no before.  . when a relationship ends badly that should teach you to do things a little differently the next time.
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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of course I definitely understand your point.
my problem is with statements like omoge's with the whole "if he wants to sleep with you so badly, make him marry you" or whatever. I definitely wouldnt want to go down the aisle with a guy who feels like he has to just to get me in bed, that's usually the reason you have guys who marry the loyal wife etc yet they go behind your back in the marriage and cheat on you with whores.
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omoge (f)
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TOH, another way you could interpret it is ''waiting'' on both side. that is, stay off sex till you are ready. am sure if the poster was ready he wouldn't be in his present wahala you know, only to go to the guilty island.
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PTH (m)
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There's an easy way of determining whether you love a woman enough to walk down the isle with her: (personal oppinion) - if all you think about is getting her into bed barely a few weeks after you first met, forget it. Bang and go! - If you find yourself showing a lot of restraint and respect to her by keeping of sexually, bros unless something terrible happens you have just found the woman. Living without sex does not kill, there are so many things to learn about a woman than how well she does in bed. Keep your hands off her and you just might enjoy your relationship more. Without the unecessary guilt and apprehension that comes with sex.
Why eat the yam while it is still cooking on the fire?
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spoilt (f)
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but why would a guy put a girl who he intends to marry eventually through an abortion? whats wrong with stepping up on wedding plans? i know a couple who got rid of a pregnancy because they werent quite ready and didnt want anyone to know that they were having sex before marriage. they got married a couple of months later. what is that? 
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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but why would a guy put a girl who he intends to marry eventually through an abortion? whats wrong with stepping up on wedding plans? i know a couple who got rid of a pregnancy because they werent quite ready and didnt want anyone to know that they were having sex before marriage. they got married a couple of months later. what is that?  Lmao sounds like madness to me and I agree with your first question. I assume that is why the girlfriend is disgusted with him. He proved himself to be untrustworthy and useless in the time she needed him most. I can personally see why she agreed to the procedure and not want a kid with someone like that.
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k0be
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they're both asinines. there's a reason for the wrap it up ad.
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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. Keep your hands off her and you just might enjoy your relationship more. Without the unecessary guilt and apprehension that comes with sex.
I'd think you were gay and trying to use me as a "beard" 
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spoilt (f)
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I'd think you were gay and trying to use me as a "beard"  is that how you view guys who wont ask for sex? that's absurd!
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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I'm being sarcastic. A cynic, I am 
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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ok fine not gay. how about asexual? 
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spoilt (f)
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ok fine not gay. how about asexual?  asexual like big bird? funny!
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spoilt (f)
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hmmmm. this is getting interesting. TOH are you up for the offer?
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PTH (m)
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hmmmm. this is getting interesting. TOH are you up for the offer?
she lost the right to have a say in this matter when she said i was asexual.  She's going to have to swallow her words, period! 
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ThiefOfHearts (f)
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Not a fan of this word "swallow" 
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+osisi
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Not a fan of this word "swallow"  TOH stop tempting David,you Delilah 
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spoilt (f)
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Not a fan of this word "swallow"  get your one track mind out of the gutter woman! ROFLMAO!
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PTH (m)
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Not a fan of this word "swallow"  its my favorite word.  don't worry you can expunge it from your own dictionary.  TOH stop tempting David,you Delilah  This time, tempting is allowed from TOH only.
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spoilt (f)
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its my favorite word.  don't worry you can expunge it from your own dictionary.  This time, tempting is allowed from TOH only. thought you were a changed man. you just preached an abstinence sermon few posts back. remember?
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PTH (m)
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thought you were a changed man. you just preached an abstinence sermon few posts back. remember?
 i'm a changed man o. But just once to prove a point to TOH. . . she threw the first gambit.
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oyie (f)
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i don't blame girlfriend o,infact i wonder y she has not learnt her lesson and fled.u had d guts to say u took her to d best clinic! @ 26 her mates are having children in their husband homes.what exactly is ur problem sef?is not that u don't have a job,or no money.so what up?
or u want her to wait until she gets like 4 more abortion and u still make no move to marry her?
u can't eat ur cake and have it.
fine she made mistakes but form d sound of it she has learnt.i wish i could say d same of u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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redsun (m)
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You are responsible for your actions,you can't have it allways,it is more of selfcentredness,live with it.
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akindaves (m)
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hi, I think you got what you ask for. How do u expect her to feel comfortable with u after u have made her to commit murder by aborting her and your baby? I think the first thing both of u should do, is to ask God for forgiveness because u can't hav peace after commiting such crime. thereafter, u can try to amend your relationship with her if she is still interested because u hav made understand that u are not the kind of man that is proud to take responsibility of your actions. Finally, i wish u well.
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stefykarl
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it breaks my heart to when i read such things about abortion and all that, you know the way people are talking about it is just so lame and stupid, because maybe they have not been there,i had one though and till today, now it still hurts and hunts me, so i know what the girl is going through, not as someone said her plans didnt work out, and guys talking about her to get a life is because u are not the one involved, there is this feeling or attachment to ur first pregnancy and u have to abort it, is quite a terrible feeling.is one thing u can't forgive yourself of, no matter how u try to move on and the effect is the guy in question will be disgusting to u, u wont like to see him or have anyhting to do with him again, because mere setting ur eyes on him brings back all the pains in the theather and all that,. so my brother i will advice you to let her be, just leave her alone, it will take Gods grace to take u back and even if she does, it can't be like before and she will find it difficult to trust u again. she already feels like a murderer and she hurts on seeing new born baby or hearing the cry, she wont be confident or free talking to u on things concerning her or bothering her because u are an "enemy" to her, so my advice to you is stop tormenting her and leave her to find succour else where, she will trust someone else not u. and these are the truth so do have a wonderful time and never ever dream of that again
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Sonye (f)
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@ Poster My question to you goes If you were to eventually marry this girl and afterwards, she cannot be able to have any baby and the doctor tells her that it is the abortion she did previously that ruined her womb. Will you still stay with her, love and respect her and not marry another wife?
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terzungwe (m)
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Bad move my brother, but its done. And NEVER EVER CHOSE WORK OVER FAMILY. NEVER. You need to know what the most important things in life are. She will be full of RESNTMENT now; full of regrets, thinking of how her child would be now, the mummy things she would have been doing. She loved you enough to listen to you, but will now be wondering why, now that life after the abortion has brought pain, guilt and doubt about a future with you.
don't crowd her, give her space, give her time. Get her friend or someone she respects or loves to talk to her. You may need to wait a year for her to come around, depending on how hurt she is. Iam of course assuming you still love her and still wish to marry her, not that you have proof she is fertile. And "IF" she comes back, she may use this to torment you at least once or use it as grounds to disagree with you. Prepare for this, and pray for the grace to be calm and forgiving if it happens. Remember, you also need forgiveness.
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wynny (f)
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well,all you can do now is pray.what is done is done, if you are truly remorseful and you truly want your girl back,talk to her and start over on a clean slate.No lies,No deceit watsoever, love is a wonderful thing, all the best.
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