My Ex Wants To Have Lunch And A Talk!

@contributors

 You guys are wonderful, i guess members of Nairaland are getting matured daily. I had to wait until now to reply to this topic because most members in similar thread.

@topic

I'm going to be very concise and explicit.

Now consider the following:

1. Breaking up:
In every relationship that has been secretly stained with a particular likeness and selfish interest by one or two of the players (knowing or unknowingly) must crash no matter how long. (Ask someone about a failed relationship)
An when this happens, the person involved must have found a better alternative. However, the other party (the unsuspecting victim) would go through emotional trauma (i have been a victim before) that could terminate the existence of such person if not properly handled. Most times, such breakups though painful, but are blessing in disguise. Ask yourself is urs a blessing?

2. Acceptance & New found Love
At the end of every trauma, its time to decide whether to love again or not; some would be scared, others could be  bold   to take the risk again (with absolute cautions though) to avoid the repetitions of what had befell them. Some are lucky, others could be unfortunate as the may be a victim of another heart break in their sojourn  for a true love. Ask your self are u fortunate with your new found love?

3. Hunting past
The most common thing that comes after the collapse of a serious relationship is the unforgettable past. Now, it could come in different ways and manners. For discussion purposes, im using this; sometimes, the new found love may not be up and doing in a particular area, consequently, the mind of one time victim of heart breaks goes back to the former partner. Then the picture of the former partner could be fully made clearer if one does not handle wt special care. (this is also applicable to both the betrayer and the betrayed). When this happens, one may not derive satisfactions in every part of the new found relationship and it may be foretelling an imminent danger.  Ask yourself; do you still feel hunted by the good times you shared with your ex?

4. your decision
At this stage what matters is you attitude and decision as to what u actually want. Do u want to go back to your terrible past and be left in the cold again? do you want to be retarding or accelrating?  Do want to concentrate on how to build your current relation to beat the past or remain stagnant? or Do u want to face the future and forget ahead letting your paste die unattended to? The decision u make at this point is your only succor, because no one else can make decision for u.

@poster

a. T o make sure u don't loose our current relationship, open up to your current boy friend and be sincere with him.
b. I'm sure he (your ex) knows knw weak point and he wana use it against you.
c. He (your ex) has been betrayed or disapointed by his new lover and needed to use someone to heal his heart.
d. im sure if he (your ex) had needed your help outside to make u come back to him, he would have told u that on the phone.
e. "if" you must see him in person, let him know your are coming with your boy friend (and be security conscious), (probably he maybe coming to seek for your apology)
f. No matter what happens, don't let your b/friend be suspicious and also don't go back to him (from experience, it doesn't work out im most cases)

Conclusion:
No one can make a choice for u, its your life.

i'D advice you go for the lunch.
what the hell? will you avoid him all your life?
is the way to prove to yourself and to him that you're really over him.
who knows he might want to tell you he's getting married or something along that line.
i say, you go. what harm could it do? i see none whatsover!
this is a chance to discover the truth. don't pass it up.

except u want Okafors Theory(Once nacked,stands nacked and can be renacked) to apply in your case ma dear,say a big no!
if he can't give u a hint of what he needs to talk about on the phone,then it isnt a matter of life n death.He might just be coming to spoil the good one u ve going.Either way,its your call,your choice but be wise.cheers

@ poster,

I will advise you to inform you new guy about this and i will expect him to allow you to go but will only tell you to be careful

You can never be too sure that you can handle him,you might think you can and get there to find him irresistible.

But nevertheless,it might be worth goin there to listen to whatever he's got to say but make sure you keep your new guy informed.

i don't know y gals fall into the trap of their exes?is it because guys are smart or witty or what?

Habba bros!, wich one b di love own inside now?, abeg no come confuse the sista oh
The old "i love u" wey them tell am still dey affect am, you still wan come join ya own.
Take ya time o  _{just kidding}
Honey girl if you're not strong, i repeat don't go, we exes have our ways o. i know what he can do. Cheers

WHAT ARE You PEOPLE STILL DOING IN HERE, E NEVER DO!
E DON DO ABEG!

baby be careful sha,you never can tell if he still the mr rite 4 you.watch out his intention,notice d way he talks and c if he has really changed.plz no sex even in the next 3 months of contact.i feel things might workout,we all make bad mistakes perhaps he is penitent.what is yours will be yours so pray over and tell God to pass over the cup if he is fake(funny but it works) cheers 

and he has prolly nacked her toto 2 finish by now

@ Pinkttea

I would say this:
1. What kind of relationship did you have with this guy and what led to the break up.  If it was his fault that the break up occured, maybe he has realized it and wants to make amends.  It doesn't necessarily mean he wants to make a comeback.
2. Ask him if it is possible to discuss on the phone.  Let him understand that you are already in a relationship and then watch his reaction.
3. If you are unsure of your reaction to him, then don't meet him.  If you are very sure you are over him, then meet him and listen to what he has to say.

Feel me?

@poster
Let him come.Tell your boyfriend about his request (if u have mentioned him in the past) and meet him in the company of your boyfriend.No be talk? The three of yuu can do the talking together.It makes life easy for everyone

baby girl, shit happens. After 9 months and he still wants to have a talk, listen to what he has to say.

3 letters, hun,    DNR  (Do Not Resusitate!!)

from lunch and talk it would lead to another thing _{abeg sofri sofri o}