Am I Having An Affair With This Smart Girl?

I've married for 8 years.  My wife and I have a general marriage life.  Everything is so fine till recently,
I met a lady in my working place.  My boss teamed us up for a project.  At first, I just thought she is a diligent, independent, and smart girl.  She is quite attractive, honestly, and is still single.  Well, I only take her as a good and close working buddy.  We often share lunch time talking about the project because there is really many details to work on.  The official meeting hours are not enough, and we both think discussing it outside the office hour is a good idea.  Somehow, we start to chat something beside the project because we agree both of us are quite team players and would like to know each other more.  We become close friends.  So far, it is good and my wife knows my special colleague as well.  Recently, I don't remember when and how we start the topic, that we start to talk about sex.  I suddenly find that we both have good preference on sex, and this topic really make us hot.  Real hot.  We really want to have sex with each other at those moments; however, we both stopped, which is good because I'm in a marriage.  Well, my wife never would like to talk about sex with me for those years even I've tried very hard to do that, then I give up.  Now there is a close working partner would like to share this erotic thoughts with me and at that time, even we did not really physically in touch with each other, the emotional and psychological connection is just perfect for both of us,  that feels really really good.  We both want to talk about it again and again to satisfy our imagination, say, fantasy.  It's really magical, indeed.

I don't know how to define this kind of relationship with this girl.  Am I having an affair with her?  Am I cheating on my wife?  Is there any implicit problem in my marriage that I keep indulging myself in this mental closeness with this girl?  What should I do?

Just talk about ur project topic, and your project topic alone., Rest is easy

You need to realize that after being married for a while , the grass starts to look greener on the other side. Marriage takes work to keep the flames glowing. Go home to your wife, invest the time you spend with this girl spicing up your relationship with your wife. Make her understand that there are areas of your marriage in which you are unfulfilled. She might not be as adventurous as you sexually, but i'm sure you can reach a compromise that will work for both of you. Please don't cheat on your wife, remember the vows that you made and take them seriously.

Yea thats the truth,  Stop talking to her rite now unless it becomes big trouble.

Oh dear.  There is fire on the mountain.  Please, this friendship has to go on a break today!


It won't help.  You can only tell her when you have stopped talking to the girl for a complete month.  The way she will react as a typical Nigerian woman will only push you closer to the girl.  Please don't tell her.

What you need to figure out is how to get her interested in sex talk.  Tell us about your wife.  Is she beautiful?  Is she old?  Is she smart?  Is she a stay-at-home mom, a businesswoman or an office worker herself?  Is she the church-going type that thinks that sex is dirty, unspiritual, and only suitable for making babies?

if you give in and have sex with her or start a sexuall relationship with her, it will be fun yea but how long will it last a week? a month? and then what if your wife finds out you break her heart she gets a divorce all for some fantasy .its never worth it talk to wife and let her know how much you would like to talk about sex and better stop talking sex with that girl before you start having sex with her

I feel like flogging you right now or pouring pepper in ur eyes. you are so so dumb.  please, just say it to us, you want to have an affair with this girl. She finer than your wife and u using style to say bla , bla bla.   Once u cheat with the girl, she leave you. Don't forget why you fell in love with ur wife in the first place, all because of this asshole, you want to leave all for that . please, wake up and smell the ogbono soup. immature man

@Seun, 

Ask Dr Phil.

thatz right u better flee and flee quick, the worst thing u'll do is to cheat on your beloved wifey
try to stop sex talks with the girl because the more you talk about sex the more you both want to feel it and if you do you won't like the outcome
please for the sake of love (your wife's love) and for te good of everyone

@ Markesh, jeez men, a guy gives u a distress call and asks u what to do and u reply do it? do what men???

Ilovepda

please tell me are you male or female? i was reading one post of yours from earlier this year, and like here again i am confused are you pulling the wool over our eyes?

I was going to reply but thought i ask first save wasting my time if you are doing this for fun , forgive me if i am wrong. below is what i mean

 [Should I Tell His Wife That He Is Having An Affair With Me? ]

He/she posted as a woman in this thread, and now he or she is posting as a man.  I think he/she is a woman.

i think ilovepda is a girl,   are you, ilovepda?

i was reading her/his posts as well.  interesting stories, though. either she/he is a fiction writer doing some research, or she/he is sharing the id with her/his friends for those people have similar problems, or she/he is really fooling us

anyways, it's my first time on this site and it's an interesting fact to discuss.

chai, i don dieeeeeeee!!!! una no go kill me for here oo. the he/she thing really is hilarious, at least i find it so.lol

  

I'm ignoring all the jokes to answer the author of this post with hope that he's not playing with my mind.
I think I understand that after 8 years of marriage, u kind of want to try something u don't get to do in your marriage( in this case that will be talking about sex with ur wife) however, it's a huge risk if not a mistake. It's a risk because u are neglecting 8 years of marriage for something that will fetch u about 10% happiness while ur wife provides the 90%. It's a huge risk because if u go for it, it could potentially ruin ur marriage which u might not see at this current time. This whole situation is considered a temptation. It is easier to avoid temptation that to overcome it. Well, some how u couldn't avoid it and now she's working with u, all u gotta  do is to overcome it.
My friend, weigh the pros and cons before u make your decision because u know what's best for u. Here lies the option of good and bad but the choice is yours!