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Gamine (f)
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i like the story
but theres too much description for me eyes, too much words
Anyways we r all learning
On ur predicament, u didnt say anything specific
i have felt odd in my life too but i know the reason
u didnt state any.
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slitty
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CHAPTER 1:
TOBE AND HIS FRIENDS
Obinna, Tobechukwu, Ahamefula and Gozie sat under the shade of a large Odan tree in the forest of Umunkwu.
They were a group of four friends [Gozie,Obinna,Tobechukwu and Ahamefula].They were aged twelve, thirteen and fifeteen respectively.
Due to seniority, Ahamefula was the leader of the group.
The friendship of the boys dated back to when they where all in primary school. Gozie being the cleverest boy in class IIA at that time was always fond of trying out new words he learnt from novels or poems, on his classmates especially the dimwits of the class.
One of such occasions found him exchanging words with Ahamefula. Ahamefula was one of the dullest boys in class IIA though his parents were well to do.
“Look at yourself. Bastard that’s what you are.” Gozie spat out acidically. A smile was playing upon his lips.
“What, what, did you say?” Ahamefula stammered. Gozie walked away feeling triumphant as he saw the fury, his words had gotten Ahamefula into. Later, as he sat on the first seat in the rectangular shaped classroom that housed class IIA, he smiled to himself as teacher Nwankwo was explaining a point in the maths lesson.
He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to face Ogechi-the girl that sat behind him. She handed him a squeezed paper. He turned from Ogechi to meet teacher Nwankwo’s gaze.
“Be careful” The teacher shouted, waving his fat long cane
“Yes sir.” Gozie replied as he hid his hand behind his back.
Teacher Nwankwo turned to the black board and wrote down three sums. While he did that, Gozie quickly opened the paper that had been given to him,
“Meet me at the school garden after school”. He read
Gozie heaved a little sigh which the teacher didn’t hear.
“Do these sums class, I am giving you all five minutes to submit it”.
A small murmur rose in the class of thirty-two pupils.
“Who amongst you murmured?” He said facing the class.
A hush fell on the class.
“Very well then, I shall smell out the miscreant.”
The stern looking catholic said.
This instilled terror in the pupils, ‘smelling out the miscreant’ was always a very cruel way of finding out the truth. And they all dreaded this mechanism always employed by the teacher of the class which was segmented into three rows. The pupils were watching him. His eyes fell on Ahamefula. The ever fearless boy had his eyes on an artwork, given him by one of his friends.
So engrossed was Aham in the artwork, that he didn’t notice the sign some of those in front were giving him. The only prompting he got was a sharp pain he felt on his back. He screamed and stood up holding his back. He met the eyes of his teacher.
“This is the miscreant”. The teacher spelt out. The class was still. They watched as their teacher pulled Aham roughly by the shirt out to the front of the class.
Those in the middle row knew it was Aham who made the comment all along but could not dare talk for fear of incurring his wrath. As they watched the teacher taunt and tease him, most of them felt vilified.
“Everybody say shame on him”
“Shame on you!”
Where Gozie sat, he laughed loudest. The teacher spent close to ten minutes bullying the boy he referred to as ‘fat-head’. After he had exhausted his pent-up anger, he ordered Aham back to his seat.
Ahamefula returned to his seat with his head bent low and his chest rising and falling. He sat back on his seat and swore under his breath. Ada, the girl that sat in front of him shifted closer to her desk to avoid him.
“You have five minutes to work on the sums. Now get to work. “He said.
All the students in the class including Ahamefula took their pencils and first copied the sums on a fresh page in their note books. They drew a line at the bottom of the fresh page and began working.
Exactly five minutes later; the teacher bellowed in his loud baritone voice.
“Pens up” All the pupils took their pens up and the teacher went round to take their note books from them. When he was comfortably seated on his seat, he took out his red biro from his drawer in the table he occupied.
“Bring out your English readers and go to page ten.” He shouted.
Every one obeyed the teacher’s command “learn the new words there. You shall be using it for your home work today,” He said turning his face to his students and saw they where busy at his prompting. He smiled and faced the files in the note books in his desk. He marked everyone’s books before clearing his throat
The pupils became aware of his eyes. He stood in front of the class and watched for the pupils with a keen eye. Holding the note books up, he positioned himself beside his desk and called out the names from bottom to the top [according to their scores in the sum]
“Ahamefula Amadi.” He called out first as the boy walked out to pick his note book which lay on the floor.
He kept calling the names until he got to the top.
“Gozie Chiejina. ‘He said with a smile on his face .As Gozie walked up to take his note book; the teacher took his cane from the top of the table and handed it over to Gozie. “Gozie will have to give Ahamefula a few strokes of the cane. “ He said.Ahamafula walked to the front of the class and took three strokes of the cane given him by Gozie.
He returned to his seat as the teacher wrote the assignments on the board for the pupils to copy.
Gozie got to the school garden to find Ahamefula waiting for him. He walked over to where Aham sat beside an orange tree.
A slap was the ovation he received. “Leave me alone”. Gozie cried.
By now Ahamefula had a strong hold on Gozie’s school shirt.
“Not until you tell me what the word bastard means”.
Gozie refused to answer the question,as Aham held on to his shirt and occasionally gave him a slap across his cherubic face.
“What is going on here?” Tobechukwu shouted as he approached with his twin brother Obinna.
“This stupid boy wants me to teach him a lesson.” Aham said.
Tobechukwu pleaded with Ahamefula until he left Gozie alone. The four of them who lived in the same part of the town walked home that day on the insistence of Obinna.
That marked the beginning of the friendship between the four boys. The first letter of their names were coined to form the word TOGA. This word they used as the symbol of their friendship and they parted with precious possessions symbols of their friendship and continuous commitment.
At the end of that term, Aham came thirtieth in the class for the first time.
SLITTY and GEMANE hope u don't mind my staeling your thread. i am posting a chapter from my soon to be published hildren's classic.
about my predicament, its like this!
for reasons i don't know about, i am the odd one in my house.everyone seems too different from me. this gives me troubles constantly with my mom and the rest of the fmily. i have seized to get bothered about it but the reallity is too obvious to ignore.
HEY EVERYONE, please TELL ME WHAT MY STUFF SOUNDS LIKE!
you pointed out a mistake that i made and i quickly recitifed it, i made my apologies to gamine, and you are doing the same thing you accused me of doing, not to worry you can have the thread if you want, i'm even tried of posting anyway. and we say government is bad, you know---- it starts from the individual. cheers |
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angel_empy (f)
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sorry slitty, i guess i'll leave u alone.
i was just trying to pull ur legs but u have pulled mine even more.
sorry nd forget i ever disturbed u, or gamine.
sorry once again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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slitty
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CHAPTER 6
It is now almost a year since I joined the firm. Things are going smoothly and well. My brother has another baby and my grandparents are almost screaming their heads off, as is my mum. She is already thinking I am going to turn out to be one of those stiff-shirt career women. Any time she calls, all she talks about is the beauty of marriage, how her friend’s daughter came to visit her with her baby and husband.
My relationship or whatever is with Michael has blossomed and is still running high. It was by unspoken agreement that we started going out and it’s been fun and heavenly. I don’t think there is a more romantic guy than Michael and he’s not even mushy with it. He is spoiling me rotten. We speak every day, go out three times a week and for the rest of the week we share the cooking. Whenever he travels or I am not in town, I miss him like crazy. Our sex life, hmm, has skyrocketed and every time is always new to me. Because I can no more deny it even if I want to, any time I think about him I get goose bumps all over. They even noticed I am happier at work. One day, my boss saw me passing he put a hand on my wrist and said, “You are looking more radiant these days.”
“Thank you.”
“I sure know it’s some guy.”
“Ah.”
“Ah what? Don’t be ashamed, it’s the best thing that can happen to one.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Tell the guy to keep it up,” he said and walked away. My boss is a very warm man in his late fifties. He is such a father figure that you can trust with your life and at that moment I felt like hugging him and telling him how happy I was. Happiness is not something one can hide. All my co-workers noticed the change in me. When I got back from my leave they all concluded that it befitted me. Most guessed it was the guy who I brought to the company dinner. In fact, some have even been hinting me about wedding bells. Can you believe that? The only reason why I am not enjoying myself to the fullest is Cynthia.
Cynthia thinks that I am a backstabber. She said I betrayed her trust and snatched the only person she loved. I tried to explain but I couldn’t say anything. What could I even had said? I can have said he loves me because I don’t even know how he feels even in the throes of passion. Come to think of it, he didn’t even ask me out! Would I even have said no? I don’t think so. Cynthia and I barely say a civil good morning to each other again. And not being the type to keep grudges, it bothers me a lot. But Tolu said I should leave her alone since I’ve tried making things like it used to be. Tolu is very happy for me. She thinks we are now two peas in a pod since she is also getting married soon. Marriage! It sinks my heart even though Michael and I are good. He told me during one of our discussions before we even started the relationship that marriage was not for him, after all. He had tried it once and the girl had called it off two days to the wedding. So no more wedding, he said. You might ask why I am still in the relationship. Well, I didn’t know I was going to fall in love and I deceived him to enjoy it while it lasted. Now, while I know it is best for me to get out, I can’t help but stay. I love him too much to stay and I love him too much to go. This has been weighing me down recently.
“Hey you.”
“Hello sweet.”
“How was work today?”
“Stressful. I will be traveling outside the country the day after tomorrow.”
“Let me get you something to drink. I cannot drink beer, ok?”
“Ok.”
I gave him his drink and started massaging his stiff shoulder.
“That’s good.”
“What?”
I pointed to my hands on his neck.
“See, I have been thinking.”
“About what?”
“Hmm, good, good, good.”
“Be serious.”
“Where you are spending Christmas?”
“I haven’t even thought about that but I guess with my parents but I haven’t made up my mind yet.”
“I see. Which country do you love to visit?”
“Jamaica for one but why?”
“Oh nothing.”
“What are you thinking?”
“Would you like to spend Christmas with me? We could take a trip to Jamaica, of course.”
“You are kidding.”
“Ain’t.”
“Of course I mean yes,” I said, giving a hug from the back.
“I like that,” he sad. I added a peck.
“I have been thinking again.”
“Seems to me that you’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately.”
“I sure have.”
“So?”
“Hmm, by the way you will make a good wife and mother.”
My heart did a summersault.
“What made you say that?”
“Oh nothing, I guess it just came out.”
“You were saying?”
“I have been thinking we should…” he began saying but before he could finish there was a knock on the door. I went to see who it was.
“Hello love.”
I was so shocked I couldn’t speak for a minute or two then: “Rogers! What are you doing here?”
“Well, aren’t you even happy to see me? Won’t you even ask me in first?”
“Well, come in.” Before I knew it he entered and was hugging and kissing me.
“Baby, I missed you so much, I couldn’t stay away any longer. I love you. Marry me and we’ll do whatever you want to do.”
I struggled out of his grip as I felt Michael’s eyes on me. I looked toward him to see him staring at me with steel in his eye. I turned back to face Rogers, my ex-fiancé.
“Roger, behave yourself, I have a visitor.” Roger can be a fool and that’s most times.
“Don’t give me that look, let me explain.”
“There is nothing to explain by the way congratulations.”
With that I just got so angry.
“If that’s how you see it, thanks.”
“Bye.”
“Forget.”
“Ok,” he said and left.
I went back inside and Roger was all sweet on me.
“What did you do that for?” I asked.
“What”
“Tell him you’re my fiancé.”
“But it’s kind of true.”
“Maybe you’re forgotten but I don’t think so we parted ways seven months ago and you are my ex.”
“Sorry about that but I came to make up with you which I think you should be happy about.”
“And why should I be happy about it?”
“Well, I am offering marriage.”
“You’re crazy and you can go throw your ring in the River Niger for all I care. Get out of my house and never come back. I don’t even want to perceive your smell, you son of a gun.”
“What did you say?”
“What part didn’t you hear?”
“The get out and don’t ever come near me part or the son of a gun part, you smchuck.”
“Don’t you call me nasty names?”
“You’re stepping on my nerves.”
“I sincerely hope it breaks forever.”
“You’re such a mule.”
“Get out of my house and make it now.”
Roger left and I was all alone. I tried calling Michael but his lines were not available. I went to his place and didn’t meet anybody. I tried all I could to get in touch but I couldn’t. I went back home and for the first time in my whole almost thirty years I couldn’t sleep. I cried my eyed out and tried consoling myself that it was better that way since he wasn’t even about to marry me in the first place but no matter how I tried I just couldn’t stop crying. It was as if I had been saving all the tears for that particular day. I told myself a hundred times there was nothing I didn’t do in excess. I got angry with myself, then with Roger and Michael. I moved from anger to hurt to self-pity and lastly to depression. The next day I tried to put on a bold face at work but my colleagues still noticed so I told them I was coming down with malaria. I called Michael’s office but was told he had traveled. He was meant to go tomorrow, I said, but the secretary said he shifted it. I was alone. I went home to sulk then I told myself good riddance. There was nothing I could do again until Michael returned. At least he could have allowed me to explain but I reasoned with myself again that I was not at fault. He didn’t even define our relationship. That nasty nitwit Roger. How I just felt like biting his nose off, the arrogant fool. When I think about it now, I wonder why I had even gone out with him in the first place. What was I thinking? And it was not like I was even attracted to him or anything, it was only that I was rather desperate at the time and there was no one else around. Well, everyone makes mistakes. Not that I am regretting but it can be quite annoying and sometimes sad, like it is now. I lost the man I loved through my past mistake but its ok, shit like that happens. All I know is that I might as well forget about all my dreams about marriage and babies. It’s either Michael or no-one else.
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seluvsmayo (f)
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Hey slitty chapter seven please!!!!!! i really need to know the outcome of this story and also to let you know that i think you are a prolific writer and am sure you can make a living off this if you keep at it. Thumbs up girl.
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slitty
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thanks for the encouragment. i'll definately get chapther seven across.  |
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slitty
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CHAPTER 7
It’s now a week and two days to Christmas. We are closing for the year tomorrow and everywhere is bubbling. I’ll be traveling to my parents in five days’ time.
I’ve been surviving, living each day as it comes. The prospect of spending Christmas without Michael is scary. Tolu wedded two weeks ago. Cynthia and I got back together during the wedding. She has found another person she is in love with. Zainab has been very comforting. She, Dan and the kids are spending their holiday in Kano. They asked me to come along but I decided Tolu is on her honeymoon, Cynthia is with her new catch and I am all alone. My boss invited me to dinner with his family but I decided not to go. My ankle has healed completely. One wouldn’t even know that I had been in a cast not long ago. I saw Isaiah George while jogging sometime ago but I managed to dodge him. I haven’t even gone for Christmas shopping. I don’t even know what I’ve been using my free time for. All I know is that I am so maltreated these days; everything in my house reminds me of Michael. To make matters worse, I have some of his things with me. I do nothing but think about him. When I see the couch I think about the first time we made love, how sweet it was. How I want him, how I miss him so much. I get caught up in nostalgia all the time. I don’t think I ever want to stay alone again.
“Hello.”
“Yes.”
“Zaniab, how are you?”
“Sylvia, what has been happening to you, it’s been a while?”
“I’ve been busy and I haven’t shopped for Christmas. Are you doing anything tomorrow?”
“You want me to follow you?”
“Yes.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for anything. What time?”
“Say ten o’clock so that we can finish early.”
“Ok then.”
“How about Dan and the kids?”
“The kids are scattering the house as usual and Dan is fine.”
“Say hello to them for me.”
“I will but what about you?”
“What about me?”
“Are you okay?”
“I am.”
“Sure?”
“I think so.”
“Is he around?”
“No.”
“Does he know how you feel about him?”
“He should know; he is not blind.”
“Have you ever told him how you felt?”
“Well, no, but he should be able to see by the way some things are hard to say.”
“That is where you are making the mistake. No risk no gain.”
“But what if I get rejected?”
“That is what I just said. What if you don’t? How will you know which is which?”
“But…”
“No buts, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Ok bye.”
“Yes bye, and think about what I said.”
“Thanks, I will.”
At least I have done one single thing now. I still have to call my brother and my parents but I just don’t have the guts. Now Michael is all I ever think about. I remember the little disagreement we had. Now he’s always cool when I am boiling. His gentleness: how would I ever live without him again? Time heals, I guess.
“Hello bro.”
“Hey you, where have you been?”
“Relax Alex; did you call me throughout out last week?”
“No, why?”
“My phone did not ring throughout out so I guess it was you.”
“Just imagine, typical of you to say such.”
“How are my niece and nephews?”
“You should come see hem yourself.”
“Bimbola n’ko?”
“Owa daada, see I’ve perfected my Yoruba.”
“You still are coming at my back.”
“Sis, are you coming over for Christmas?”
“I don’t know o.”
“Anything the matter?”
“Nothing.”
“Sis, you know you can talk to me, ok?”
“Ok bro, but not, ok?”
“Ok Sylvia.”
“Yes.”
“Are you happy?”
“I think so.”
“Is that an answer?”
“Look, Alex, later, ok?”
“You sure you don’t want to talk about it?”
“Yes.”
“Alright love.”
“Thanks.”
“See ya later.”
“Greet my lovely babies for me. I’ll send them gifts.”
“What about mine?”
“Yours? I’ll see what I can do.”
“Bye sis.”
“yes.”
At least I’ve gotten that out of the way. It now remains my parents but that will be later. I still haven’t figured out where I’ll be spending the holidays. I don’t want to stay in my parents’ house and not with my brother and family either but somehow I know things will sort themselves out.
I decided to go out on a stroll so off I went and I met Isaiah George on the way. I nearly dodged him but he saw be at the last minute.
“Ha, Ha, so this is what I’ve been doing, eh.”
“Isaiah George! I didn’t see you.”
Who am I deceiving?
“Liar you saw me, you were avoiding me. Come to think of it I haven’t seen you since that last time. Eh, now I know. You’ve been avoiding me abi?”
“No, it’s not what you think.”
“You think so? Nearly everybody has been avoiding me lately. What makes you any different? In fact did I tell you my girl left me? No, I don’t think so. Well, she left. Guess why. She said she was tired of being like she was; that she was tired of taking water and carrots to slim down, see?”
“But Isaiah, don’t you think water and carrot is too harsh?”
“See you. In fact I think all females are the same. What is wrong with water and carrots? By the way, she only eats the four days out of seven.”
“It’s alright, what are you doing about her? Have you gone to see her?”
“She went back to her place in Niger State. And my snakes are there. If I go who will feed them? You might ask if I can’t get my of my colleagues but you see, my snakes wouldn’t eat from any other person but to me they are my babies.”
With that I just got irritated frustrated and disgusted. The guy is feelingly repulsive.
“Isaiah, do you know you’re a selfish man! You mean your stupid snakes come before your girl? You should be thrown into the gallows. You are such a horrible person you tell somebody to eat carrots…”
“Don’t…”
“Wait, let me finish. Don’t you dare interrupt me. And to crown it you have to listen to me and listen well, ok?”
Isaiah was so flabbergasted he couldn’t say anything again. He just nodded meekly so I continued.
“And water four in seven days of the week! Why don’t you stop jogging and start eating things to keep you in shape? Let me tell you what I think about you in full. I think – in fact I know - you are an arrogant foolish ingrate.”
I was panting when I finished. I had never said that many words before. I walked out on him and he just stood looking like the world had crashed at his feet. I bet nobody had ever said that much to him before and you know what? It felt good. It felt really, really good. I was angry. Angry at myself and the mess I had made of relationships, both now and then. I was angry that people take people for granted. I was angry at the likes of Isaiah who just feel everybody should do whatever they say. I needed to lash out, to speak out, to bring out frustration and Isaiah George was at the right place at the right time. I felt lightheaded after what I did and I was a little close to happy, happy in the real sense. I wanted to go back and give him more but I just kept going. Then I noticed I was swinging my waist as I was walking in the direction of a Christmas tune playing, “Santa Claus is coming to town.” I started singing along and dancing. I felt free. It was as if a wedge was lifted off me and I thought to myself, what a beautiful place, I am going to spend my Christmas here. And it wasn’t scary again at all.
I ran back home. I was going to make myself a very big Christmas cake, decorate it then take it to the motherless babies’ home. I made a resolution. Nobody is responsible for me; I am going to take up my responsibility from that very minute and for the first time since that incident before I slept I thought about Santa Claus and I just for minute wished it were real then I could’ve written him for a Christmas gift. Michael was still in my mind and if there is any gift I want for Christmas it is Michael and his love. It happened that I slept well and deep. And I knew deep within me that I was now going through the process of healing.
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slitty
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CHAPTER EIGHT
Two days to Christmas. I am feeling very happy the Christmas festival has gotten into me I sent the various gifts by special delivery to be delivered on Christmas morning. I had woken up feeling very excited. My house was screaming white and red and I’ve taken to wearing bright colors, too. I ate, took my bath then wore a red top with white skirt. I used a white belt with red stripes then a Christmas cap with transparent slippers. I was ready to take on the day. I had invited my boss and family to dinner to day.
I was going to the market to get the things needed for the dinner and for Christmas food. Did I ever mention that I love cooking I don’t think so but I love it all the same. It is my best hobby so far and my talent. I can cook anything. I even have my own recipes of food but today I am making curry soup, coconut rice and moussaka.
I got back from the market around 3.00 p.m., which was rather late, but I managed to get everything done by 7.30. I was expecting my visitors by 8:00. I hurried to take my bath then dressed. I wore a red boubou with a white scarf. I checked myself in the mirror and thought I was the only Mother Christmas alive but I still looked good. It was five minutes to eight when I was finally ready. I sat on the chaise lounge flipping the pages of my latest novel while I awaited the arrival of my guests. I was happy but tired after the whole dinner. Their family was one of a kind. They were all charming. I’ve never seen my boss as relaxed as that ever since I started working for the company. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. I thought to myself I should start preparing for the cake and cookies I am going to make. After I had done enough for the night I decided to retire.
******************************************************
“Baby.”
“Yeah.”
“Talk to me, love.”
“you left when I needed you most.”
“I am sorry, I was a coward.”
“What are you saying?”
“I left because I couldn’t bear losing you.”
“But…”
“No buts, I loved you since the first day I saw you in that funny-looking gown screaming at your brother to bring your boots.”
“Ah.”
“Listen that was the first time I ever saw you and I was a goner. I told your brother I liked her flaming sister and he said you are as stubborn as a mule. I couldn’t gather the courage to talk to you. Whenever I got near and you looked at me I became numb.”
“Oh, I love you.”
“I love you more than life.”
As he brought my mouth close to his he disappeared. I woke up with a start. I had been dreaming. I looked at the time. It was five in the morning so I got up, took my bath and tried to look presentable. I went to the kitchen, got my baking sheets out and started the baking. I had a long day ahead and didn’t have to think about anything or anybody but the cake and the chicken I was going to give, I said to myself, and busied myself. I was so involved that time flew. I finished by 4 p.m. then set out to the children’s home. It was so lovely being with those children. We sang together, made Christmas gifts and danced. I spent the day with them. I left them, branched at a supermarket and bought enough chocolate and ice cream to feed an army and then drove home. I was determined to enjoy myself so when I got home I drew my curtains and lit candles around the house right up to my bedroom. I had already made salad in the morning so I brought it out of the deep freeze. Then I lit my Christmas tree and put on soft Christmas songs. I tuned the volume in such a way that it was low but it vibrated through the whole house then I indulged myself in a lascivious bath. I soaked myself up. I was so relaxed that I nodded off when I regained consciousness. I dried myself and blow dried my hair then wore the bath robe I had bought myself as a Christmas present.
I ate to my fullest but I don’t think I ever get filled without any snack after. I relaxed in the lounge and brought out the latest romance novel in town, a cup of chocolate drink and a basket full of chocolate buns. Now I am ready for the festivities, I told myself. I was almost at the middle page of the book when I decided I was going to be a romance writer when I retired. I continued reading, taking sips of that sweet chocolate when I heard a persistent knock on my door. I didn’t want to answer it but reluctantly I did. I opened the door and didn't see anybody but a small hamper with a Merry Christmas note. I took it inside, happy that somebody remembered me, but it was still Christmas Eve, I thought, so I decided to leave it till the next morning. I kept it under my tree then went back to my book. As I was about pick up my book, I heard another knock. I jumped up and skipped to the door because I wanted to get a picture of who was dropping the gifts. Don’t ask why I thought it was a gift; I just thought so. I opened the door and I saw my best Christmas gift ever delivered to me hale and hearty.
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seluvsmayo (f)
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Thanks girl for adding the chapter eight. i guess you will add the continuing chapter pretty soon because am following the story and am actually finding it interesting. Keep it coming and keep it up girl. All the best,
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biolabee (m)
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@slittty
Though I'm not a romance person u have a gift here and i think you should push it
These are my comments
1. We really have not yet appreciated Sylvia's characterisation. yeah she's lonely but nothing about her personality in terms of a loyal. agrressive, loving.you have not expatiated on her relationship with her family, brother and all. This is important to we can feel her development
2. Ithink the pace is prety reallyy fast until when Micheal left, it was just GO GO GO but tings seem to slow down now I thin u need to slow down a little
3 What role does zainab and tolu play in the unltimate development of her love life, i feel they are still fringe players
Nice passionate chapter but is Micheal taking her for a ride give us a little insight in to Micheal or is she just down for the s^^x
Ny two cents
Please be encouraged
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slitty
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Thanks girl for adding the chapter eight. i guess you will add the continuing chapter pretty soon because am following the story and am actually finding it interesting. Keep it coming and keep it up girl. All the best,
thanks |
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slitty
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@slittty
Though I'm not a romance person u have a gift here and i think you should push it
These are my comments
1. We really have not yet appreciated Sylvia's characterisation. yeah she's lonely but nothing about her personality in terms of a loyal. agrressive, loving.you have not expatiated on her relationship with her family, brother and all. This is important to we can feel her development
2. Ithink the pace is prety reallyy fast until when Micheal left, it was just GO GO GO but tings seem to slow down now I thin u need to slow down a little
3 What role does zainab and tolu play in the unltimate development of her love life, i feel they are still fringe players
Nice passionate chapter but is Micheal taking her for a ride give us a little insight in to Micheal or is she just down for the s^^x
Ny two cents
Please be encouraged
thanks for the insight, i will make amends |
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slitty
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Epilogue
Here I am two years later married to my husband, Michael. Did I hear you gasp and say “wow”? Well, that how it is. When I opened the door that day, Michael was standing there with the most loving look I have ever seen. I was speechless
“Can I come in?”
“Sure, it’s been long.”
“Em, how has you being doing?”
“And what brings you here?”
“To answer your first question, I have being doing very fine and doing a lot of thinking. Secondly these things brought me here.”
“I am listening.”
“You want to know?”
“Sure, why not?”
“Okay, I’ll let you into one now, ok?”
I shrugged.
“First, I came here to wish you a happy Christmas.”
“That’s nice of you. As you can see, I am quite enjoying it.”
“Yeah, candles, Christmas tree, carols and best of all chocolates and novels.”
“Eh ehn.”
“You’re angry, right?”
“No, I am not. Why should I be?”
“Too fast, yes you are.”
“No, I am not.”
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I…”
“Please let me finish. The second thing I came to do is to tell you I love you. I left the other day because I was so angry, not at you but at myself. I was expecting you to know how I felt when I didn’t tell you. You see, I’ve loved you ever since and I was trying to make you love me back but I guess I did it in the wrong way. I am sorry for not telling you but I was scared of myself and the way I felt about you.
“The woman I was supposed to marry practically left me standing at the altar. I don’t know why she left me and I still can’t figure out why although she told me when I met her later that it was because of children. She doesn’t even want one but I wanted many. She said she was sorry that she thought she could go through with it but at the last time decided she couldn’t.”
“I am sorry.”
“Don’t be. I soul-searched myself and decided I didn’t want to live my life without you, which brings me to my third reason.”
“Wait…”
“I want to convince you to marry me. I don’t know how I’ll do it but I am sure not going until you say yes. You can forget that guy. I don’t care if you love me or not, if you want babies or not. All know is that I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life.”
“Ooh.”
“Sylvia, do you by any chance feel anything towards me, even if it’s only affection?”
“Ooh Michael, I love you.”
“What did you say? I mean say it again,” and he was hugging and kissing me at the same time.
“I love you.”
“I love you too, more than life.”
“So will you marry me?” he asked and brought out the most beautiful emerald ring I had ever seen.
“Oh yes.”
*
We now have a little boy and girl. Life as a married woman has been ok, in fact it has been a challenge which I look forward to everyday. I seduce my husband at every opportunity and you know what? He is a willing victim. We have our own share of disagreements but I know him and love him by the day. Michael spoils me rotten with love, spoils our twins although they are just a year old. My parents, especially my mum, are extremely happy. They are both happy with their son-in-law and grandchildren. My brother can’t just believe his best friend is now his brother-in-law. I have all I ever wanted: a family and a soul mate. I am so happy. All my colleagues too are happy.
“Hey love,” Michael said popping his head into the room
“Wow smashing………….”
The End
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biolabee (m)
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@slitty
u have sth here and as i said u deserve to be encouraged
Please don't crucify me o
ON a hand, what genre are u into, i like thriller
do you have a thriller comin up
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slitty
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@slitty
u have sth here and as i said u deserve to be encouraged
Please don't crucify me o
ON a hand, what genre are u into, i like thriller
do you have a thriller comin up
i am not, thanks again i do have something coming up but i am soo busy write now. soon but remember i am an ametuer writer, i still need much work to do merci |
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seluvsmayo (f)
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good work slitty keep it up.
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slitty
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good work slitty keep it up.
thank you very much, you are highly apprieciated |
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Sharn06
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Lovely
Splendid
Extremely good
Bestseller on Nairaland, lol.
Keep it up, girl!
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slitty
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Lovely
Splendid
Extremely good
Bestseller on Nairaland, lol.
Keep it up, girl!
thank you very much, you made my day and watch for my next book |
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angel_empy (f)
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my goodness, d ending of this much enjoyed work of urs is trully nice. i enjoyed it.
please post something else soon.
sorry 4 posting on ur thread but i couldnt help it!
u are really good at the writing thing. keep it up.and all the best.
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