Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)

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Nairaland Forum  |  Entertainment  |  Jokes Etc  |  Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
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Author Topic: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)  (Read 2138 views)
hot-angel (f)
Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« on: March 29, 2006, 11:51 PM »

  Hey y'all,  I got this in my email and thought i should share. don't know if it should be under jokes section, but chatterbox seems to be close.  lol

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

 

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are,



Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.



Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
A: Who cares?Huh?,



Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!

 

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO?
A: I don't know, never seen either.



  Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business


Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A: Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.


Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink,


Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention of driving.


Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!



Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.

----------------------------------------------------------     

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, “University of Oklahoma."

A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman replies, "I'll miss you, "

"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.

He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said - That's a good idea,  you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour!


A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish. The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.


Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger,  Whoosh, immediately he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!

A PRAYER,

Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods.

Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN

Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.

Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.

Q: What is the difference between men and women?
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"

Send this to the bright, funny women you know and make their day! And send this to five bright men who have enough sense of humor to take it!
vichel (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #1 on: March 30, 2006, 01:33 AM »

Hehehe u ain't got jokes. but hey like em, it's good to know that u think of men this much
Dojo (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #2 on: March 30, 2006, 01:01 PM »

 Angry Angry Angry
Watch out because I will surely retaliate on behalf of the guys!
ioday (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #3 on: March 30, 2006, 01:37 PM »

hooooooooooooooooooo Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin
A round of applause to Hot-angel for the sole describing and truthful words. It just describe  and fit THEM to the T in capital letters

WOMAN = WHO-MAN
whiteroses (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #4 on: March 30, 2006, 01:43 PM »

 Grin Grin Grin Grin some people would find it mean though but who cares Grin Grin Grin it's a joke anyway
micklplus (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #5 on: March 30, 2006, 04:27 PM »

 Angry this women self !
it made me laugh sha because it was a joke and nice one at that  Angry
Rhodalyn (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #6 on: March 30, 2006, 04:30 PM »

thats a real good and funny one girl Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy that means men are such Lips sealed Cheesy Cheesy
dm (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #7 on: March 31, 2006, 01:58 PM »

Hmmmmm, made me chuckle shaa oo, I guess the ladies are having a fun-filled and hilarious tyme,  Wink
hot-angel (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #8 on: April 01, 2006, 07:13 AM »

Look at them,  hehehehe,  sorry guys.  Tongue
dm (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #9 on: April 01, 2006, 08:58 AM »

Okay, hot-angel, bring it on Tongue
We dudes are up to it Angry Angry Angry

Wink
theORAKU (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #10 on: April 01, 2006, 12:19 PM »

nice one.
Grin Grin
but u aint heard  the last of the men.
diddy4 (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #11 on: April 01, 2006, 03:49 PM »

Hi all, am new here. i gotta hand it to you girl, that was a good one. Cheesy Grin Wink
Dvampire (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #12 on: September 20, 2006, 01:31 PM »

yeah right :p


* Dvampire.jpg (1.29 KB, 69x125 )
oge4real (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #13 on: September 20, 2006, 02:46 PM »

na wao,hot angel remember;BE SUBMISSIVE 2 MEN because GOD CREATED THEM IN HIS OWN IMAGE.
yetimama (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #14 on: September 20, 2006, 06:27 PM »

wao that waz really hot- love it Wink
Gkings (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #15 on: September 20, 2006, 07:25 PM »

that's not too bad, but men definitely have some good sides that you will need somewhere along the line.lets pray for men
Anderso (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #16 on: September 29, 2006, 04:13 AM »

Hot angel wait to hear frm d guys
geevibe (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #17 on: September 29, 2006, 07:10 AM »

way to go girlfriend!!! u really were TIGHT!!! and da BOMB!!! Cool need i say more! just keep giving it to them like its HOT!!!!!!!!!! Grin
EmemJU (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #18 on: September 29, 2006, 09:05 AM »

Hahaha. Good one.
A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need, a man wants every woman to satisfy his ONE need. Lol
yahoo! (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #19 on: September 29, 2006, 12:49 PM »

Ladies abuse men till eternity if you want. the truth is you still can not live without them Tongue Tongue Angry
dabby (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #20 on: September 29, 2006, 08:39 PM »

hahaha
that was tight. Grin Grin
biyibabe (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #21 on: September 30, 2006, 08:21 AM »

U ROCK GIRL.U REALLY GAVE IT 2 THEM HOT&SPICY, Grin Grin Cheesy Cheesy
popsonj (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #22 on: September 30, 2006, 05:46 PM »

guys! what do you say? Huh Huh Huh  She got us right  Tongue Tongue Tongue
Alexos (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #23 on: September 30, 2006, 07:57 PM »

why do women try to run us down?
Because we are better Wink Cheesy Cool. They also want to be as good as us. Grin Grin Grin

Afterall, Out of the man came the woman



and hey! Popsonj, she got you, not us. Don't categorise us. We are MEN, NOT men.

and hey girls!, don't try so hard, we are the first and still the best.
L.O.V.E (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #24 on: October 01, 2006, 04:31 AM »

@hotangel
good one,very good one Smiley
Tmoni (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #25 on: October 02, 2006, 06:32 PM »

we were going to have a very nice time on earth until god decided to throw out the temptations in heaven and branded them WOE onto MAN= WOMAN Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy
Chiori (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #26 on: October 02, 2006, 09:00 PM »

Remember that your father is not a woman but a man.
Chiori (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #27 on: October 02, 2006, 09:15 PM »

Amd moreover, devil get junior brother where woman dey.
Oracle (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #28 on: October 03, 2006, 01:53 AM »

Hot angel Angry you better watch your mouth before you loose it. And watch your fingers too, control them in typing
iice (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #29 on: October 03, 2006, 01:59 AM »

Ahahahahahaha i have read these before but they still funny esp the ironing board and fart part Grin Grin
Christino (m)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #30 on: October 03, 2006, 07:22 PM »

LoL, LMFAO! Grin
dabby (f)
Re: Time For Some Male Bashing (For A Change)
« #31 on: October 06, 2006, 07:36 PM »

You guys shouldn't take it so much to heart. It was just a joke but the fact that its true just makes it funnier.

tight joke.
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