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Crossroads (m)
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The Lord is my Sheperd
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rume (m)
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hmmm, If you are so depresssssedddd and really want to go back, then go, but be sure of what you are doing.
You haven't gotten a definite job in Nigeria yet, hmm with your qualifications u should get a job back home. There are opportunities back home even if it's not working for somebody! Pray too! Always know your environment can't limit you if you don't let it
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jay bee (m)
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I am in a similar position only that i don't have any job offer from naij. I earn more than i can ever dream of in naij but i honestly think d sky is the limit with things you can achieve in naij with a very good job.
so many negativity with high paying jobs here as u tend to be stuck (limited prospect of promotion) because we will always be second citizen even if u were born here as such.
Don't know if u read about a bank (i think commerzbank or might be deutche bank) that will only make German white citizen head their respective strategic posts (positive discrimination if u read into it).
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Crossroads (m)
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I shall not want
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MT
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@Crossroads.
I am so happy that you r being honest with yourself. Most people living in UK know that it's a depressing environment , especially when you were not born here. There's a big difference between happiness and Money. No matter how you are paid here, you will still have that "emptiness" there because mama charly knows how to take it back.
In Nigeria, there's hope, happiness of being among your people and opportunity to be fulfilled. A lot of people could disagree with these, but this is my personal opinion. The greatest thing I feel one can get here is the certificate, and once you have it, it is left to you to be able to claim your return on investment, which I know can easily be realised in Nigeria.
I will suggest that you don't trade your future for their HSMP , limited leave to remain, indefinite etc. Those papers do not amount to happiness, fufilment and wealth. It's a white man style of deceiving the blacks. If you are reading the dailies and watching news well on tv, you will realise that heat has been turned on the foreign migrants, especially the blacks and the asians, and it can not get better(This is not a curse but the fact).
All said and done, pray to God to guide you , but be real and honest with yourself while making your decision.
Ta!
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career1st (f)
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You took the right step by reaching out for help. I was once in your shoes and i made the decision to come home. The land is green here but you have to see it for yourself. I mean, its a pschological battle considering the many challenges here but with many answers and soultions too. The environment is for the most part depressing like someone rightly said (UK).
If you are starting to dream, then its very likely that there is something you are been told by Someone. For many of us, our instincts are one of the least things we utilise but are sooooooo significant. Moreover, if your really good job is starting to make you feel edgy and uncomfortable, its only a matter of time. You may take out your frustrations with the indecision on friends, colleagues and loved ones and i'm certain you don't even want to think about that.
Check your work style, sitback and think about things holistically, maybe your persona conflicts with your working conditions and environment, maybe your interests are completely elsewhere (like Nigeria), make sure it's not because your friends have left for Naij that you are feeling this way. Feelings are temporary and can derail our destined path when we take certain actions!
Having said all these, pray even if you don't believe there is a God.
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bookworm
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why not work out a plan were you can return to nigeria after a couple of years and stick to it.Dont just come back without a plan and end up furstrated
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Crossroads (m)
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He makes me lie down in green pastures
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Crossroads (m)
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He leads me beside still waters
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Tats (m)
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Guy, I think I need to understand the situation better. If you wish to talk, e-mail me and I can call you. I am in London and working from home today. My e-mail is temporarily on my profile.
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Crossroads (m)
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He restores my soul
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career1st (f)
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Crossroads, why not send a mail to contactus@career-first.org; i'm sure we can help you.
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Kaestro (m)
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@ Crossroads.Your problem seem more of the adaptability to the life in UK than a job in naija.You are currently employed in the UK and enjoy the status of being a legal (temporary) resident.Maybe you should ask yourself if you are in the right job because there is no guarantee that your employment back home will provide you the happiness you desire.I'm sure you are aware of the factors that will frustrate you although not comparable to the existence in the UK do you think you are prepared for that? However I think you are in constantly in tune with your gut feeling and you come across as someone who is bold and daring.
What I would do in your shoes is: Get as much experience and organise your finances,keep your focus on naija for the next 2-3 years.In the meantime make sure you visit every 4-5months and get yourself updated, embark on findings about your sort of job and familiarise (again) with the territory.Eventually you will be able to make a gradual step back to naija.In all take your time, naija no dey go anywhere,your money no dey go anywhere.Maximise your return on investment in the UK.
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Obalende
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@ Crossroads This is a very interesting thread and I feel I am in a position to give you some good advise. I will first give you my advise and then elaborate. VERDICT: Return to Nigeria OR/AND try and get Permanent Residence of Canada or US. It will be an advantage to get the permanent residence of a developed country while living in Nigeria. ELABORATION I had the privilege of studying undergraduate in the UK and now, I got International Graduates Scheme visa which I used to secure a 10month contract with a worldwide firm - so I feel I am getting a good deal by studying + 1 year experience. BUT I WILL NEVER SETTLE IN UK for the following concrete points - perhaps you might identify yourself in any of the following: 1.) I cannot live in a country where almost every day, there is a continual insult of immigrants in the media. 2.) UK is a country that encourages one sticking with your own kind - there is a lot of discrimination. If you are not in a place where there are many Nigerians (like London and Birmingham), you will not enjoy it. It is very difficult to build a social network outside your own race. 3.) England depresses my soul. If you are not careful, you will be relegated to the background. Everybody is angry and depressed and it is really taking a toll on me. 4.) The English lifestyle is boring - it is individualistic in nature, you don't know the people next to you and you cannot joke around. People are poor in Africa, but a barrow pusher, despite his poverty will still make jokes with you. In UK, it is strictly EVERYBODY MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. 5.) You will never really belong here. As long as you are black, you will be treated with disresspect either subtly or explicitly. The British will always find ways of reminding you that you are not really one of them. 6.) Many native people habour the belief that they pay tax for immigrants and you will never really belong here - the British people will find subtle ways of reminding you that you are not really one of them which effects in daily interactions. Upon further research, I discovered that this problem is peculiar to the UK. The US and Canada can be quite different (though not perfect - the same problems exist but on a far lesser scale at least as far as I know; but at least person relationship can be better). For me, UK IS NOT AN IMMIGRATION OPTION. My options are Nigeria, US or Canada. The US for instance is a no mans land - there the draw backs of UK are reduced. I appreciate that everywhere has pros and cons, I wont mind living in Nigeria and enjoy my life, than spend my whole life in depression just because I want to earn GBP. When you weigh the pros and cons of living in England in modern day Britain as a black African immigrant outside the major cities (especially Birmingham and London), you will see that it is not worth it. Of what use will a wedding be if all the attendees are Nigerians or ethnics - the typical British man wants to have NOTHING to do with an African immigrant when we are supposed to be living in a multicultural england? So you must consider social balance as well. I think you have to strike the balance between money and hapiness (I think UK provides money but not hapiness - but your mileage may vary). I am not even bothering applying to Graduate schemes which i once did last year (Ericsson etc if they will station me in UK). I am very very happy to discuss this with you - I am in the UK now; PM me and I can call you for a chat. just here in lies the difference!!! A British man will never tell someone he met on a forum to call him for sharing opinion as this is considered "going too far". As a result, British lifestyle is generally boring. I used to be very outgoing and could start conversations with anybody I wanted. Now, I can't, the system has shut me in and stripped me of personality. I am thinking of going to do my Masters in Canada and to live there afterwards or Nigeria. http://www.immigrationboards.com/viewtopic.php?p=86820&sid=1c2d9a9864d8cf68400ffb9566509dd1RANTING OVER! |
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Crossroads (m)
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He leads me in paths of righteousness
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rume (m)
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@ Obalende
I feel you
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Crossroads (m)
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For his names sake
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bolaoni (m)
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@ Crossroads, Thanks for starting this thread. I am sure it has opened the eyes of so many people who always think the grass is greener on the other side. I was even thinking this is not the same London we adore so much here.  My advice is to follow your heart and also consider the numerous advice you have been given by all the great people here. @career1st I have been hearing so much about your organisation. I never knew it is Mrs. Adesanya that is the brain behind it. Keep up the great work you are doing Ma'am. Will appear unto you in church pretty soon.  |
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The One (m)
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@crossroads
You get problem no be small o, just kidding anyways
My guy, believe it or not, I personally know you. You were at IC and your name starts with O. You remember king street, in Aberdeen?
Anyways, I'm back in Naija where I expressed personal preference for while you said you wanted to stay back.
I'll get your number from Ir_ _ _ and give you a call. Our talk is not what we can exhaust on nairaland.
Try and have some fun OK, at least in the mean time.
Later
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D328babe
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Other issues are that in fact, I'll be earning about same amount in Nigeria (Oil Company) and with less tax while being able to save and invest more, some peeps are of the opinion that I should remain here for a couple of years, gain experience and return, what is the assurance of this? and most companies look for 5yrs experience and above, does this mean i will leave the next 5 years of my life in misery and confusion with no assurance of the future I'm praying hard for guidance, Never been through stuff like this, please I'm in deep need for more advice and prayers, What will be my exit strategy? I'm gettiing deeper into the work and taking on more responsibilities every day, As you are clearl not happy, in the event that you cannot find a job in an enviroment with more Nigerians/Africans, and you want to come home, i would also suggest that you check the websites of all the oil majors in nigeria, i think i gathered you are an engineer (correct?) if that's the case it's better you come home into a comfortable job witha good company. The reason I say this is that if you have been this unhappy, take the time to plan for a job that will give you equitable pay and make for the frustrating times you have endured, from their websites, Chevron and Shell are actively recruting talented nigerians from abroad and will pay for ticket and shipment of personal effects, Dont rush back, take the time to plan and seek more information as you are doing now, |
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Fiver
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im thinking wether its just me freaking out and being cowardly not to face the international environment You can't hack it boy? food for thought, it always good to be a big fish in a small river, you get high salary with your international degree and experience everybody call you like the boss or treat you like a king No wonder most Nigerian business men can't do business outside nigeria just make sure you plan your exit very well or else you might regret it, have you consider changing jobs or environment UK is tough so you have to be tough with it! sorry mate no one to oppress in the UK naija is about enjoyment even if you work in a high pressure environment you get time to 'oppress' Welcome back son at least you tried |
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Obalende
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@ crossroads canadian immigration under federal skilled worker will take approx 3 years. If you secure a job in a province (u can apply from UK) for provincial nominee, to process the papers will take about 6 months; you can go as an investor too. see www.cic.gc.ca You can also get directly hired from UK for the US (especially Houston, TX where related firms are) - so also apply; apply for green card lotter too. With these four ive mentioned, you increase your probabilities. |
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Crossroads (m)
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Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
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ndubest (m)
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wowww,  I MUST SAY THAT THIS THE BEST THREAD I HAVE EVER READ IN THIS NAIRALAND NO NAME CALLINGS NO SARACASTIC JOKES AND ALL THATS NIGERIANS, we are really our brothers keepers  WHO SAY SOMETHING GOOD IS NOT FROM THIS COUNTRY?? i wish other will learn from this and i wish nairlanders will take up other peopleS issue and trash it out as this one has been done constructively to all the posters thanks guys its a great jobs @crossroad, think through the suggestions and follow your heart its your life and itS once, try and enjoy it, money is nothing without happiness and satisfaction peace to all |
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floffy
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I'm so proud of everyone that has contributed to this topic, it confirms that we'r all not carried away by the GBP, and still know what's important in life.
I'd like to tell crossroad, sincerely search your heart for what brings you fulfillment (helping others, making money, living comfortably. etc). It will help in your decision making if you'r fair to yourself.
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bolaoni (m)
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@crossroads, I'm not sure I know what your career/job is exactly, so I may not be able to profer solutions to some of your questions 1) You alone can answer this question. What exactly do you want? What are you looking at achieving? If you set months or years for yourself, will you be able to enjoy those extra time? Your answer to these will depend on what you really want. Some years back, I was working at a legal firm, not a high-paying job, and I had it at the back of my mind that I want to set out to be an entrepreneur. I was using the job to get acquainted with the computer and after my 8 month there, I felt a burden within me to leave. All the extra days afterwards were not palatable for me. Before the end of the month, I told my boss I want to leave. He was shocked at my decision and so many others were as well. I left at the set time and since then I've never begged to apply anywhere. That is 4 years ago, October 2003 to be precise. It wasn't an easy path to follow, but I have a plan for my life and if I hold on to that job, I may get too comfortable and I know I will have myself to blame. So all I am saying is know what you want and follow it. FOLLOW YOUR HEART and be responsible for the consequences  |
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Crossroads (m)
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I shall fear no evil
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Obalende
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"3. What is the impact of a cancelled work permit on one's future overseas travels and employment in the future?
4. What should I do in the meantime to add value? sorry, please help with i should get lined up will be difficult to get if i return to Nigeria."
3. Does not have any impact - these are just immigration papers - another country doesnt care what u have done with UK as long as its not a criminal offence/ illegal activity. You reserve the right to cancel or renew as it suits you. immigration is a two way deal.
4. Try and complete one year if possible.
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Kaestro (m)
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@ Obalende.
One can't totally agree with your perception of living in the UK.To start with the population of those who made it to the UK through the course of studying can't be compared to those who arrived in order to carve a niche or secure a means of survival and livelihood.Going by that alone,you know very well Nigerians will stick it through whatever pains or treatment they get because majority of them have little or no options.
You are correct there is always some form of migrant degradation in the media and even in the society but I think that is the norm in most parts of the world.Its more like killing the spirit of immigrants by ensuring there lives are made more miserable by the minute.That is a human factor,when a man's territory is continually being populated by aliens he is bound to feel threatened and most likely react by enforcing limits and restrictions.I'm sure you are aware this applies to even the eastern europeans and people from developing countries.But guess what? Nigerians will endure the pain and maltreatment rather than go back to someplace they are worse off.It all depends on where you're coming from.
With regards to the inablity to create a social network outside your own kind,yes there is not much room for integration because we both have different sense of reasoning and it's difficult to enter a caucus if you don't share similar backgrounds.Nevertheless I think people are still happy with the little friends and social circle they belong to.Have you ever wondered why even as Africans we rarely integrate?It is up to you to choose the things that excite and interest you.Your intention to go back home should not be based on that.
The issue of depression,anger,seclusion and there individualtistic nature this is what thrives them as a people.That is an economical factor,it appears the their society is programmed to offer you the finer things but yet bite you so hard.It is true that everybody to his own is a common practice but not in all cases.I've heard about neighbours who knock on your door to introduce themselves or sometimes even offer you home made treats.I'm sure you've met people on the train and engage in random conversations,I'm sure you find oyinbo chicks easier to catch than dudu chicks so on that note one can't conclude that they are so self thinking.
To be reminded you are not one of them should be a reality check that you are actually not one of them.Why would you want to be ? You have enough things to deal with than be chasing to be on the same heritageous status as a descendant of the land.They say in Yoruba "éni ti ó ba wó ojú iyawó l'o mo wipe o'n sún ékún." Keep your head up,do what you have to do,get yours achieve your goals and when it's time to bounce do it with enough swagger.Don't bother yourself about the British lifestyle.I would suggest a mental state of being in a war zone and your whole aim is to win the war and get out.As long as you understand your rights and are able to express them without deterence you have nothing to piss about.
I'm sure you know there are immigrants who have these so called natives as their employees.
In terms of living a happy life,trust me life is what you make of it.There people in worse situations and are still able to live everyday happy.Your mindset is what creates the outlook of what lies in front of you.Don't let nothing strip you of your personality,try to broaden your thoughts and rationalise the reasons why oyinbo people are the way they are.I don't agree the typical British man does not want any association with a black immigrant I consider that as being a one sided story.What makes you think a typical African wants to socialise with an oyinbo man? Its a two way street mate.
Going elsewhere doesn't change much other than the people and perhaps the society it's pretty much the same everywhere.Canada,the states,Australia,Italy,Spain,Germany etc. However you feel your happiness,financial security,self fulfilment can be achieved is what you should be after.
As much as I empathise with us Nigerians,lets not totally condemn the opportunity either given to us or taken by us surviving in foreign lands.On a final note I support your opinion about living in Nigeria it's one of the best desires an immigrant can fathom however this is often not the case when you check out.
All opinions expressed here are not in any way confirmed of based on true facts they are just personal views.
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Obalende
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@ Kaestro mate - this has been a very peaceful thread and I hope it remains that way. I understand and respect your objections to my views. However, I don't have time for anymore elaborations. my judgements of the UK are based on an empirical 3 year observations of living here but I clearly stated on my post that your own mileage may vary - so if it has varied then its good for you! It must be said however, People are driven my different things - personally, I want to feel comfortable where I am living without any biases at the expense of money (but that is just me) - someone else may not really care if he is treated like an idiot everyday and will still be happy just for money - so people's mileages may vary and opinions and objectives may also vary. So therefore, crossroads, just weigh your options and decide what is best for you. Again, time wont permit me to go through this stuff - just observe that each of those statements I made are not empty - they have been tested by time in the UK. Statistically speaking, the statements I have made are well justified - it again depends on you and what you look for - some people are driven by money, some by social networks, some by other things - so it depends on you- . @ Obalende.
One can't totally agree with your perception of living in the UK.To start with the population of those who made it to the UK through the course of studying can't be compared to those who arrived in order to carve a niche or secure a means of survival and livelihood.Going by that alone,you know very well Nigerians will stick it through whatever pains or treatment they get because majority of them have little or no options. You reserve the right to have your own views. You are correct there is always some form of migrant degradation in the media and even in the society but I think that is the norm in most parts of the world.Its more like killing the spirit of immigrants by ensuring there lives are made more miserable by the minute.That is a human factor,when a man's territory is continually being populated by aliens he is bound to feel threatened and most likely react by enforcing limits and restrictions.I'm sure you are aware this applies to even the eastern europeans and people from developing countries.But guess what? Nigerians will endure the pain and maltreatment rather than go back to someplace they are worse off.It all depends on where you're coming from. Again, there will always be news on immigration - i have no problems with that - say once in 3 months or 4 months some in positive light - my grudge with UK is that nearly everyday "this problem of mass immigration" is staring you in the face - most of the news is negative; and this creates a lot of negativity in the workplace - with news such as "half of new british jobs go to migrants" - this contrasts with such as you would hear from a place like Canada - "Quebec needs more migrants" (I follow immigration news a lot because i will soon be moving)- but I hope you get my point. This heat has also been on since 2004. With regards to the inablity to create a social network outside your own kind,yes there is not much room for integration because we both have different sense of reasoning and it's difficult to enter a caucus if you don't share similar backgrounds.Nevertheless I think people are still happy with the little friends and social circle they belong to.Have you ever wondered why even as Africans we rarely integrate?It is up to you to choose the things that excite and interest you.Your intention to go back home should not be based on that. This statement makes me wonder if you are at all living in the UK. Imagine for instance a nigerian embedded software engineer stationed in Beeston, on the outskirts of Nottingham - that place has no life - it is an industrial site - ethnics (including blacks, asians etc are almost non-existent) - I personally don't think I can survive beyond a year in such a place - why? the attitudes - had the British people I have met over 3 years been friendly I might have considered this on the basis of permanent immigration - but sadly, I can only survive short term - this is what I mean by "you will never really belong here". I can swallow the stuff for short term but not long term immigration. My definition of immigration is that the immigrant while preserving his own culture also embraces the culture and people of the host country. Black people account for about 2% of UK population, for integration outside the major cities, mingling is vital! The issue of depression,anger,seclusion and there individualtistic nature this is what thrives them as a people.That is an economical factor,it appears the their society is programmed to offer you the finer things but yet bite you so hard.It is true that everybody to his own is a common practice but not in all cases.I've heard about neighbours who knock on your door to introduce themselves or sometimes even offer you home made treats.I'm sure you've met people on the train and engage in random conversations,I'm sure you find oyinbo chicks easier to catch than dudu chicks so on that note one can't conclude that they are so self thinking. If you like that lifestyle - then all the best! I personally don't like it nor do I intend to live it. The neighbours who knowck on your door to introduce themselves are most likely immigrants not indegenes. Its a cultural difference not a negative thing. I personally don't like living in a daily saddistic atmosphere but perhaps you don't mind. To be reminded you are not one of them should be a reality check that you are actually not one of them.Why would you want to be ? You have enough things to deal with than be chasing to be on the same heritageous status as a descendant of the land.They say in Yoruba "éni ti ó ba wó ojú iyawó l'o mo wipe o'n sún ékún." Keep your head up,do what you have to do,get yours achieve your goals and when it's time to bounce do it with enough swagger.Don't bother yourself about the British lifestyle.I would suggest a mental state of being in a war zone and your whole aim is to win the war and get out.As long as you understand your rights and are able to express them without deterence you have nothing to piss about. I wouldnt want to be one of them but for immigration purposes I don't want the fact that I am not one of them effecting in DAILY interactions (do you live in UK) if I am going to live there for ever. Say a few times a year but not daily as it is in the UK now. The media is fuelling societal divisions heavily. In terms of living a happy life,trust me life is what you make of it.There people in worse situations and are still able to live everyday happy.Your mindset is what creates the outlook of what lies in front of you.Don't let nothing strip you of your personality,try to broaden your thoughts and rationalise the reasons why oyinbo people are the way they are.I don't agree the typical British man does not want any association with a black immigrant I consider that as being a one sided story.What makes you think a typical African wants to socialise with an oyinbo man? Its a two way street mate.
Going elsewhere doesn't change much other than the people and perhaps the society it's pretty much the same everywhere.Canada,the states,Australia,Italy,Spain,Germany etc. However you feel your happiness,financial security,self fulfilment can be achieved is what you should be after. "I don't agree the typical British man does not want any association with a black immigrant I consider that as being a one sided story." I can't force you to agree but I hope you are not typing this stuff from another country. However, The Americas (US + Canada differs in many ways from Canada) - Have you heard of the term political correctness? This happens a lot in the UK. As much as I empathise with us Nigerians,lets not totally condemn the opportunity either given to us or taken by us surviving in foreign lands.On a final note I support your opinion about living in Nigeria it's one of the best desires an immigrant can fathom however this is often not the case when you check out. The opportunity is not being condemned, its just about balance - excellence in career at the expense of other aspects of ones life. All opinions expressed here are not in any way confirmed of based on true facts they are just personal views. |
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Obalende
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also a train is a NO NO for starting conversations!
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Obalende
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"I lived in UK for 11 months and I have been in Canada for 3 months now and let me tell you there is a lot of difference. If I had my way, I probably would have stayed in the UK but only because its just a 6 hour flight back to Nigeria than a 14 hour flight from Toronto. That said, my experience in Canada so far has been a better one both job wise and people relationship. When I was in UK, I did not know the people living next door to me, when I greet people they refuse to answer. People are generally rude and impolite. Where I worked, no one bothered to learn how to pronounce my name - they avoided me like I plague and it demoralised me -I could go and on. But in Canada - People are polite, smile at you, play with your kids, open the door for you. My office colleagues can correctly pronounce my name Everyone I meet is falling over to assist or help me and honestly I am having the time of my life. I got a fantastic well paid job in the financial industry within 3 weeks of getting here. My husband is still struggling, but he has had better response than he did in UK. I miss home but I missed home more when I was in Uk. My experience here has been better, I am sure by the time I spend 11 months in Canada --- my UK experience will be a distant memory. P.S The notcanada site is mainly for those complaining about highly regulated professions like doctors, lawyers and engineers. Those kind of jobs are almost impossible to get when you first arrive. So for anyone in that profession do your research and be ready to requalify no shortcuts. I have met a lot of people in Canada who can't speak a correct sentence in english, how do you expect to get a job? If you are in Finance, business or IT - good for you. " This lady posts on www.immigration boards.com From what I know in experience and from experiences like this - how can I see fire and fall into it? Please understand that I have nothing against UK - I love here and I am developing my career for one year here. NOWHERE IS PERFECT!!! I am just highlighting things to keep in mind - this lady posting on immigrationboards.com could not stand what I am talking about for 11 months and left! I have been here for thrice that time. Also see http://www.immigrationboards.com/viewtopic.php?t=7863&highlight=nobody+talks+forum where an indian laments his tale. These are very reliable experiences from which you can project on based on your current situation. Personally, I think the UK immigration climate has changed a lot these days. Just giving some points to back up my statements. Please note that I have a couple of British friends and a lot of naija and asian peeps - but when deciding something like this - look into the future - do I want my kids to be going through what the indian person in the above link went through? what will be the psychological impact on the child's well being or will I be willing to trade this area for money? Just some thoughts. |
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