My Brother-In-Law And I

what a mess! disgrace 2 humanhood

My dear sister, If indeed, this actually took place; then you goofed big time and u have really disgraced womanhood, do you not know women are supposed to be custodians of decency,honour, & dignity. That is why women received stronger blames in issues of infidelity- recall the " woman caught in the act of adultery" because' women ought  to know better.

The fact that some men do these things all the time and get away e.g your partner in sin-that's your bro-in-law- is not excuse for you;  a respectable married madam like you to go berserk too.

Now, Impulsive, wanton and unconscionable senseless sex as you graphically described; is only for animals and not right thinking ladies; you ought to make love to someone only because you love him, he is your husband with whom you have a bond of marriage between you two and so you celebrate your love physically. I cannot understand how you could have stooped so low and gotten yourself sexually aroused by your so-called bro-in-law, he in fact is supposed to be a big turn-off for u.

But who really knows? could you be pulling our legs as THIS COULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED?! because it sounds so ethreal, and cocky.

But who knows? If it did happen, lt is sooooooo sickening,  then you may need to go for spiritual , psychological, and therapeutic counselling and get some urgent help. If all else fails, you may consider female genital circumcision-it would greatly limit your problematic libido. Ask any African woman of yesterdays,  they were forever, chaste and faithful and this places checks on them. Today, the whiteman tells us it is mutilation, barbaric, etc.

Now speaking seriously, if you ask me; you need to CONFESS to your husband point blank; that is the ultimate solution and there is no short-cut to that, if you could sink so low, you gotta take responsiblity for your action. Some volcanic eruptions may occur with your confession, the marriage and even the relationship between d two brothers may all be in jeopardy, but withholding dark secrets of this magnitude never did any one any good. You've gotta face your devil by the face and who knows; it may well be resolved. And in future remember that the marriage bed should be kept honourably, you must not defile it! besides, you had vowed to cleave to your husband whilst FORSAKING all others eh?

look, by now you know you have made a mistake and im not trying to make you feel better, but worse things have happened. but what you do from here on will determine the future of your marriage, because lets face it, its your brother in law and not just some stranger so the stakes are definitely higher.

truth is,you stand to lose a whole lot and not just your marriage.
you do know you need to work on your self control switch don't you?

Oh please, not this crap again  Women are supposed to be the custodian of decency, honor and dignity, blah blah blah. . . Everyone is supposed to be the custodian of decency, honor and dignity, whether male or female. If the brother-in-law is any decent, he should have run for his life -- afterall we have the same example with Joseph in the same bible you're quoting from. And as for the woman caught in the act of adultery, go read into the history of that, and you'll see that the reason the man wasn't caught is because he ran AWAY. So please don't come here and post blab suggesting that women ought to know better -- this is the NONSENSE that our forefathers taught to accommodate their indiscretions while at the same time aiming to keep their wives from towing the line of adultery. We ALL ought to know better than to perpetrate that crap!

The only aspect of your post that I really like is the part where you say marriage should be honorable and the marriage bed undefiled -- That implicitly applies to everyone who is married, whether male or female.

hey girl friend, u don't sound real. u actually wanted that to happen. next time you feel sexy, drag your husband and let him have u front and back rather than seeking it elsewhere.it's just like taste, once you are tasty, first drink enough water before looking 4 alcohol, ok.

What it takes your husband too long to go through, it just took your brother in-law just few miniutes.  You must be a loose person.  Infact I should report you to your husband right away.

My people,
Have you ever heard of a leopard ever changing its spots.The poster could be one of those chicks who men date just for sex and she mistakenly gets pregnant. If not i think the husband deserves to be respected no matter what.

She is just a slut for all i care. She purposely faked her illness so that she and her stupid brother in-law coud have their way.Its the husband i actually pity,to think that he actually has a wife at home.A dog will always be a dog.

She was a slut before she got married and she will always be one.Am very sure that her brother in-law isnt the first person,maybe her boss,all her male collegues,her neighbours have all banged her.

Ashewo osi.

Laura,


Do you know her before?
Why do nland members just blurt out without reasoning.

Pliain and fine,she did something bad

You should counsel and help her out and not abusing her personality

Nairaland surely gives us lessons of life.who can one trust in this world.
Its either u likd your brother-in-law or u were just too loose or both.
Dont u know how important trust  is?
Now u betray your husband's trust.if he knew,do u think he might survive d pain.
He trustd u ,thats why he left wit his brother.You better stop the whole thing and put your foot down before it gets out of hand.
I feel for your husband,sincerely,its painful.
I'm putting my self in your husband shoes(if he knew),and i already hav a headache.usually i feel bad when people betray me.

Now i pray,GOD should smile on me and give me a good life.

i agreed wit what ""rosquare"" said,


but most of all,do not condemn yourself,
because God hasnt condemned you


u only need god divide favour

please all those condeming her should get a life she was wrong like wayyy wrong but she accepted if u know u have never cheated someone in your liofe i dare u to condemn again nonsence ehen sis jare sorry for u o!!! but confess your sins to God and please run away from the guy drop hints also to your husband see am not married or in any marriage like relationship but guys are jealous let the whole truth be with God and follow u to the grave simple

Once you cheat is ALWAYS CHEATER! Period!!!

God have mercy on your soul. your smell, which kind stupid smell u get? u where not feeling fine but u could kiss, smouch & sex abi? u have wish it 2 happen & that was y it came 2 past. just go ask God 4 4giveness because that na d greatess sin on earth. good luck.

its been long since i read such disgusting tale.

@ POSTER

you are a mess

It's amazing reading all the condemnation being poured in the name of God; it’s as if people feel they are doing God a service by denigrating Aquila.  Aquila is human, like the rest of us, and only acted humanly.

So what’s the big deal she slept with her brother-in-law?  She did what every normal person is biologically wired to do: have sex!  People should pipe down and take it easy.

Aquila, apparently you do not feel comfortable with you actions and you feel your Faith forbids your act, that is understandable.  However, you’ve done the right thing in resolving this conflict your own way and not allowing the naysayers to bog you down and mess with your internal psyche.  You go girl!

Joy, what are you doing?
carefully going through your post suggests to me that what u claim happend is too good to be true. but then if it is true i am afraid but to submit that your husband is a most unfortunate man.
i went through other posts of urs and i dropped my head, indid u sound like "it is the smell that made me do it". i am not here to judge u or watever ("let he who has no sin cast the first stone" isnt it?) but why did u put up that post in d first place? or what and how did u apply any "advice" u got from the numerous 'empathic" replies?

u went from defending yourself:
1)
"jeolousy go kill una. Especially these
naija babes. My friend just bought one and
her hubby is all over her. The perf is very ordinary.
Atleast my friend can testify.
I don't intend to reply all these cheap girls in Nairaland.
Apologied to Seun please.
All ye layabouts should think well and stop all these rubbish talk.
i am sure i am more pretty than you all.
Anyway, get your posting. i will enjoy reading the crap. "

2)
"@ariblaze
Nothing beyond what was posted o.
Just wanted to see if any babe is in my shoes.
i love the perfume but will do all my best
to keep intruders off.
Am a happilly married woman with a
loving husband. I have made mistakes. what i can't undo
i let God help and take the guilt away.
Sorry if i caused a stir by my thread.
Many ladies have been offended. Sorry"

to sermonizing?

If men were God, i would have been roasting in hell by now.
But the grace of God is passionate to a sinner, the justice of God saw
what i have done but His mercies reached out to save.
I can't believe the strength of condemnations i have recieved so far.
Its very sad that people could condemn a someone as if they are a 100%
saint of God. Its amazing to me.
The blood of Jesus did not flow for a saint but for a wretched sinner like Joy.
His compassion is beyond man's immaginations.
I am glad He forgives and i wont let any crucifiction keep me in that
guilt. Wisdom is profitable to direct. Thats what i got from God. I have moved on.
Never to look back.
May His grace abound for those who find themselves in my shoe.
HIS MERCIES IS UNTO MY GENERATION!
Amen.

Joy, what are you doing? if God has forgiven you why are u seeking men's opinion (empathy)? if u are truly married and u av value for your marriage and truly love your hussy then u should av enough common sense to dump any silly so called perfume that is attracting men to u! and bar your sniffing-boyfriend-brother-in-law from stepping into your matrimonial home again.

is it not a foolish woman that tears down her own home? does your husband need any other enemy(ies)? Tell me

please pull your life and marriage off peoples computer screens and sit down to put it right! i guess u think u av a marriage abi? sorry to bust your bubble: u don't - u don't av one yet. thats why u nid to sit down and wash watever silly smell u go to d market to buy wit your money and spray on your body (armpit) that has,
sit down and allow God to help u build a marriage and then maybe, perhaps your hussy would stop being a most unfortunate man and b a most fortunate one.

yours in Christ,
'Dewale A.