Is He Testing Me Or Is He Simply Not Interested?

Greetings Nairalanders, Please, I would like sincere advice on my situation.

I met this young man earlier this year and we hit it off very well; conversation, rapport, flirting etc however, it became a situation where I found my self letting him know that I would like to get to know him better, he responded in kind, but since this time it has always been me making contact, suggesting things etc. In normal situations I would have taken the hint and left this brother alone.

He has been consistently bad at communication, and from the offset he informed me that he is like XYZ and true to form, I have experienced XYZ from him. The thing with this man is, although he leaves all the contacting to me, he always responds in kind and opens up to me, we have both spoken volumes about our like and dislikes, marraige, kids, the kind of woman he is looking for, to the extent we speak as though we are discussing our relationship. He has told me what he finds with me - the good and the bad. However, due to his lack of input, I cannot deny, I'm confused. Is he testing me or is it just simply a case that this brother is not interested in me in that way? Or is he unsure of me? 

Just the other day, we spoke and I asked him if I was waisting my time with him as he doesn't contact me or suggest anything etc, in a nut shell, he basically indicated that I should not take this personally. We agreed to meet up on the weekend, however he just left me hanging!  I mean what nonesense is that 

I'm a woman who does not see life in black nor white, rather I believe in looking at the context in which people behave. My confusion with this man is that when we speak, we speak at length and he's level of interest towards me surfaces, however he has not put his talk into action. Just the other day we spoke again and he informed me that he is seeking a woman who can put up with his ways, I know these ways encompass his lack of communication and I am now started to think I'm being tested.

I know we all go through a level of testing people for suitability, but personally, I feel the way he left me hanging and did not respond to my call, was nothing beyond disprespectful. I have once again decided to leave this brother alone once and for all; as we know, people will treat us as the way we allow them to treat us! Me, I don't want to get to the point where I loose the respect I do have for him. 

My question to Nairaland is, has he been testing me or was is simply a case of basic non interest. I hope my thread made sence, if you want to know more please ask.

One love.

There is one way you can answer that question. Stop communicating with him altogether. Don't think about him. Condition your mind to believe that he is history. In short accept that the worst had already happened.

If he is testing you. If he is interested in you; if he appreciate you; if he is worth the stress, he would communicate with you to find out what is wrong. If he doesn't communicate, then he does not care if you are alive or dead. Forget him and stop wasting your time. But if he communicate, set in motion events that would make him talk. Don't be the man again. Let him say what he want.

He isnt testing you and he isnt interested. read the handwriting on the wall. a guy interested in you will be more forward and like he already told you, there is some other he thinks he 'gels' with better.

@ all, I thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. I have already considered the reply's and have already decided to 'hang up my running shoes'.

word

I feel so blessed to read these replies. Thank you and please keep them coming. 

I accept the replies which state it's simply 'lack of interest', however I'm more inclined to subscribe to a mixture of Olanajim x2, ThoniaSlim and davidylan, as I too have been pondering these same theories. Maybe that is the case, he's not interested but doesn't want to hurt my feelings, by rejecting me  Thinking of it like that I can now understand the poster who suggested he's actions were not outright disrespectful!

One thing I have had to consider from the get go is, this guy had told me his time is precious to him and he's very focused on building his business, therefore, he does not want any woman to come into his life and try and take this time, he has even stated that his child does not get much of his time as the way he see's it, he is building for his child's future. Another thing is the relationship he has with his female siblings - doesn't seem that great and he missed an important event for one of them and still has not made amends with her! This is what I mean by putting ppls behaviour into context., what chance do I realistically stand! Although I heard him then, I am now digesting all of this info as time unfolds. I would also go as far to say, this is someone who has a full plate but doesn't know how to communicate this to me, rather he has left time to indicate this fact. 

Anyway, he still has not contacted me to say 'sorry' therefore, I consider the weekends No show as a deliberate act! If he genuinely could not meet with me, I'm sure he would have simply informed me by now. Then again, he's silence is nothing out of his regular behaviour. Looooooooooooooong tings!

Any way sha. Please feel free to keep your take on it coming. Although I have erased all traces of his number - again.

Men/Boys, please try to treat women the way you wish to be treated, do not take a woman's kindness and patience for a weakness!  Communication is a wonderful concept. Abi.