hopeforcharles:

Maybe, maybe not, but it's expedient you tell him especially those that can come to limelight anytime because if he founds out. You know the rest depending on the man. I have a trick i use on people, if I am in a place I don't want people to see me and suddenly I saw someone I know I will rush and greet that person to avoid surprises. Same applicable

Ngokafor:





..the average Nigerian male CANNOT handle the truth about their partner's past sexually..

babyosisi:


Whether you will use it against her or not is not the issue
The main issue is,what purpose will those details serve in the first place?
Nothing
So why share all of those?

Kimoni:



Says who?

This is the mistake men are making that is turning the world upside down

Quit the double standards!!!!!!

Women are fast learning and even outperforming men in this dirty game

It's a man's world as much as it is a woman's world

Wake up to reality

babyosisi:
Ladies please imagine this scenario
In your university days,money was tight,father and mother poor,living in a one room at overail Aba
You are in the third year at UNIJOS
Temptations
Somebody comes and tells you some senators are coming into town and you follow them go party
After the party,una come go for bed
Na so you begin do small small side things and you graduate from the uni
You turn a new leaf,totally hate what you did and genuinely repent

Tomorrow you meet emeka who is getting serious with you and in the name of coming clean,you tell him all your last including the 5 senators and Mazi you chopped,emeka picks race.
One year later,you meat Nnamdi,same thing repeats
6 months later you meet charles,you will open mouth again and start blabbing
You meet Gbenga and Edet,you are still blabbing
Assuming the relationships didn't break over these revelations per se but all of a sudden you have about 7 or 8 men that you have told secrets of your life
Emeka,Nnamdi,Gbenga et al will of course tell people what you told them especially when the relationship is over
Ngwa how does that feel to know your story is everywhere
This is how girls destroy themselves with their own mouths
Don't do it please

babyosisi:


Another thing along this same line
A man and woman deeply in love,what do some stupeed women do,send pictures of their nakid behinds and pictures in compromising positions to their sweetheart because of live.
If they happen to eventually marry fine
What if they don't a.
Suddenly a picture of your naked self is somewhere in space and could be worldwide at the click of a button
What woman wants that?
Women do a lot of stupeed things without thinking
Same thing here
Share what is necessary,keep others

babyosisi:


If past incidences are easily forgotten then past incidences are inconsequential since they are easily forgiven anyway
So why bring them up?
The woman doesn't need the forgiveness when she was already forgiven before she met him
Women blab less,that is my message
Keep your dignity
If the relationship doesn't work out you will be glad you kept your stories to yourself

1stCitizen:


For real!!!

Now you take this scenario.

As a young man in university,money was tight,father and mother poor,living in a one room at overall Osogbo
You are in final year at UNILAG. You decide to get in mini-importation to make ends meet but sales are not coming in.

Somebody comes and tells you there is one babalawo near his village that can produce charms to make your business grow. The babalawo tells you to molest 4 children under the age of 7 and bring the ejaculated semen to him to prepare some diabolic portion, he tells you there is a catch and you will never be able to have children. You give in after much persuasion from your friend and frustration.

Fast forward 2 months later you become a big boy to your utter amazement and carry on to graduate and start big time importation owning a fleet of cars and choice properties around Lagos and Abuja.

Two years later you meet Temitope. You love her dearly and she loves you too. You guys have sworn to get married. She is eager to have kids for you during this time but after 4 years of dating no show!. She is approaching her late 30's and is under pressure from her family to get married.

All this time the babalawo's words keep haunting you. Your friends who visited the babalawo are also suffering the same fate.

Do you tell her the truth? Or defraud her by going ahead to marry her to sentence her a childless life?

Timbuktou:


And why in the world should a man be required to handle any such rubbish from a woman's past? Shouldn't he be at liberty to choose to stay or not to? *smh

babyosisi:


A babalawo's curse can be easily broken by prayers
Go to a spirit filled church for deliverance and his powers will have no hold on you
This one is actually a testimony IMHO

abbey621:


I suggest you look up the difference between a relationship and a marriage. Let me keep it simple cos I hate going back and forth. In business before investing, an investor likes to make an informed decision by calculating all the risks, if the company or person being invested in does not disclose past misdeeds, the result could be catastrophic! I still maintain my stance, I'd rather hear the gist from my girl than from an outsider!

babyosisi:


It is a foolish man that will reveal who he slept with
Didn't the man also sleep with people
What is the big deal
So you want to know so that what will happen?
Ask her who is bigger or better?

babyosisi:


There are times you will hear no gists from anyone including outsiders and the only one you hear is the one she tells so she can decide not to tell it.

charles316:


Outperforming men? Do not wake from your dream.

1stCitizen:


Good. I was waiting for that. You visit 10 churches in Nigeria and South Africa behind her back to no avail. I repeat. Do you tell or defraud her by marrying her?

STOP ENCOURAGING FRAUD!!!

VintageCocktail:
Nananana....extreme openness breeds contempt , resentment and the likes

Wonder how many guys that have told their wives the number of cult killings they have engaged in while in the higher institution, the number of abortions they have sponsored, their favourite ashawo and number of ashawo and brothels they have visited.....the rituals they are planning on etc


You don't spill until it is absolutely necessary, spill at your own expense.

BABE3:


that's the selfish part. Not allowing your partner have a say in wanting you or not. Na by force ? This is akin to forcing someone to marry the IDEA of you.

like I said, the goal to get/stay married is greater than having meaningful relationships in most homes.

babyosisi:
Ladies please imagine this scenario
In your university days,money was tight,father and mother poor,living in a one room at overail Aba
You are in the third year at UNIJOS
Temptations
Somebody comes and tells you some senators are coming into town and you follow them go party
After the party,una come go for bed
Na so you begin do small small side things and you graduate from the uni
You turn a new leaf,totally hate what you did and genuinely repent

Tomorrow you meet emeka who is getting serious with you and in the name of coming clean,you tell him all your last including the 5 senators and Mazi you chopped,emeka picks race.
One year later,you meat Nnamdi,same thing repeats
6 months later you meet charles,you will open mouth again and start blabbing
You meet Gbenga and Edet,you are still blabbing
Assuming the relationships didn't break over these revelations per se but all of a sudden you have about 7 or 8 men that you have told secrets of your life
Emeka,Nnamdi,Gbenga et al will of course tell people what you told them especially when the relationship is over
Ngwa how does that feel to know your story is everywhere
This is how girls destroy themselves with their own mouths
Don't do it please

benedictac:


I know, but there are somethings that are better kept. things that u are not proud of. I could understand if it is the issue of having a child/ren , or married before as a divorcée, widow and things like that but things like I was once a prostitute, a runs girl, drug trafficker all that is really not called for. to be on a safe side I could just tell him like " I have done some stupid things in the past that I'm not really proud of and are bad memories I just hate to remember. anyway thank God this is me" and all I have to do is to be real me and be the good girl. We've all had our bad memories which of course we don't want to remember. My on opinion sha !

Anyway, the saying goes different strokes for different folks.

abbey621:


Every girl I've been with I've disclosed to my current partner, even before we got serious. It helps them make an informed decision, they can decide if they want to stay or not, that's the premise behind honesty! When I first start a relationship, I ask lots of personal details, some girls have been heart broken thru no fault of their own, their stories helps me understand the situation better.

babyosisi:


A babalawo's curse can be easily broken by prayers
Go to a spirit filled church for deliverance and his powers will have no hold on you
This one is actually a testimony IMHO

I promise you hardly any nigerian man will tell any intended wife this story

babyosisi:


Hahahahahahahaha
Cunny man die,cunny woman bury am
Did they even read the circumstances around the no 3 point

All the men sowing their wild oats and proudly boasting about it,are they pouring it into a drum?
No be for woman bodi?
Then when it comes to marriage and their own woman,they will start asking WAEC questions
If you have chopped girls and did things with girls that will eventually become other people's wives,imagine that your own wife to be also did same before meeting you
Simple

Kimoni:


I have no pity for women who share naked pictures

So so steeewpid

I can't even allow my husband of how many years to take naked pictures of moi

For wetin naa

talkless of sending to one boyfriend

cococandy:
Don't mind them

babyosisi:


I hate to derail my thread to babalawo issues
Back on focus

babyosisi:

2.Details of issues in your own birth family.
Believe me your hubby ain't telling you all of his
So don't go painting your siblings and parents in a terrible light.Some stories you must tell obviously but always leave some details that have to do with family integrity to yourself.Keep your parent's and family honor where necessary especially if you fear it may be used to taunt you as some immature men do.

3 your infidelity ..
This is a controversial one,I believe in faithfulness ,let me make that clear first of all.Women being emotional beings feel the guilt of infidelity more than men.It is wrong to cheat,I will not condone it and by Gods grace will never .However,if you happen to err as humans often do and are remorseful, repent and confess to your God and take that secret to your grave. Revealing it can be disastrous and will serve no purpose.Just go and sin no more .If you are a habitual cheat,of course you should seek divorce rather than living in deception.

naijababe:


I thought confession and repentance are prerequisites of deliverance, no?

This is akin to someone insisting on being forgiven without confessing the offence

hopeforcharles:

U are kinda on point, but hmm on some issues it is necessary, because if u have done the deed be ready for the time.

naijababe:


Omo chop knuckle jor!

VintageCocktail:
Some issues bro that is the underlying word here, not singing like a canary. These issues are best revealed at gunpoint, when you ain't got any other choice, when somebody you love is about to die or meet an untoward accident ,when they are choking you to reveal....

Got someone who revealed the number of abortions the ex wife committed after the marriage fall apart, and also communicated to the asshole-of a husband that the mother had a mild mental problem due to stress a long time ago but the SOB broadcasted the intimate talks to the whole breadth and length of the community and the lady is now seen as persona non granta by all and sundry.