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Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? - Islam for Muslims - Nairaland

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Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by crystalballs: 12:52pm On Feb 12, 2017
The single ones do not want to be second wife.
The married ones would not accept their husband to take a second wife.
why?

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Nobody: 1:45pm On Feb 12, 2017
Won't say I hate it.

Just don't prefer it.
Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by cilifa: 5:47pm On Feb 12, 2017
No woman loves polygamy.

51 Likes

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by uboma(m): 6:53pm On Feb 12, 2017
crystalballs:
The single ones do not want to be second wife.

The married ones would not accept their husband to take a second wife.

why?


It is an innate thing.
And I don't blame ladies who detest the idea of being a second wife or the husband wanting to marry another wife.
Most ladies who are into Polygamy accept their fate because the society and religion imposes such lifestyle on them.
Given a choice, majority will gladly reject a Polygamous lifestyle.
This is why i have high regard for Muslim men who are content with just one wife.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Nobody: 12:08pm On Feb 17, 2017
Is not that Muslim woman hate polygamy buh who is going to be the second wife is he good or bad? he is the type that we give the first wife rest of mind.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by finderofX: 12:09pm On Feb 17, 2017
Even the aged ones that allow their hubby to marry two wives accepted out of no choice

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by ednut1(m): 12:09pm On Feb 17, 2017
because the condition for taking another wife cannot be met ie love them equally which is not possible

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by vedaxcool(m): 12:10pm On Feb 17, 2017
snapscore:
Won't say I hate it.

Just don't prefer it.

This sums it up appropriately, it is more of a preference, it is only natural that people want to be a relationship where only one partner is involved. Polygamy is not a compulsion but an option, Muslim men are advised to settle for 1 wife if in the situation they desire more than 1, but cannot handle the complexities that comes with it.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Buharimustgo: 12:12pm On Feb 17, 2017
They don't love it,but its a commandment which they must obey.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by vedaxcool(m): 12:12pm On Feb 17, 2017
ednut1:
because the condition for taking another wife cannot be met ie love them equally which is not possible

That is not the condition, TREAT THEM FAIRLY.. even you cannot love your children equally, that in itself is an injustice, but you must treat them fairly and make them feel loved.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by verycheese: 12:14pm On Feb 17, 2017
Don't say we hate it. That's gross, we are Muslims and it is Allah's command and we do not hate what Allah has permitted. We don't prefer it tho, cos of societal influence and other factors that affects us as women and maybe our children.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by vedaxcool(m): 12:15pm On Feb 17, 2017
Buharimustgo:
[s]They don't love it,but its a commandment which they must obey[/s].

Shut up ignoramus, a woman is under no obligation to marry or remain in a polygamous marriage ... she can even enter agreement with her husband that she will be his only wife . . . you have no understanding of what polygamy is in Islam

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Ahmadgani(m): 12:16pm On Feb 17, 2017
What do you expect when people abandon the original teachings of islam only to accept mediocre and adulterated ideologies and ways of life fueled by the so called western civilization

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Idrismusty97(m): 12:19pm On Feb 17, 2017
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by vedaxcool(m): 12:27pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.

There is nothing sensible in loving a husband that cheats with women outside . . . since Islam does not permit a wife to marry 2 husbands the question should be reserved for those whose religion allows such. The issue of polygamy has little to do with education but human tendency to being the one and only, selfish, there are women far educated than you that are in polygamous marriage, so just reserve your ignorant quips appropriately

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Qyubee(m): 12:32pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.
.....they shd hate Polygamy that Allah our maker has commanded and hw shd they deal with their husbands having concubines and illicit relationships outside marriage which is very prevalent in our society irrespective of religion? we can't be wiser than our maker!

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Deeypeey(m): 12:44pm On Feb 17, 2017
Omudia11:
This only shows that Islam is not the truth.

You can NEVER love two women the same talk more of four.
do u love even ur parents equally?
if u don born...answer truthfully...deep down in ur heart,u know dere s bound to be a "favourite child"
.
.
buh d point is to treat dem all equally..never to let them know u love one more than the other...
if u think u can handle it... go ahead and marry as much as four wives if u can...just remember to treat theam equally...cos if u dnt,there s a punishment fr u
its a choice..not an obligation...critics dnt seem to understand that

13 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by 982ABU(m): 12:49pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.
may almighty Allah forgive you but please if you are a muslim you need to go back to islamiyya to learn about your religion it is show totally you lack religion teaching and by the way is not necessary for some men or women to marrie if you know you can prevent yourself from committing adultry

1 Like

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Reallymilky(f): 12:51pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.

Are u kidding me? U define sanity in women as hating polygamy? Polygamy ain't the problem,its the parties involved that bastardized the concept.i am sane and sensible and I'll consider polygamy but with conditions.

6 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Idrismusty97(m): 12:54pm On Feb 17, 2017
vedaxcool:


There is nothing sensible in loving a husband that cheats with women outside . . . since Islam does not permit a wife to marry 2 husbands the question should be reserved for those whose religion allows such. The issue of polygamy has little to do with education but human tendency to being the one and only, selfish, there are women far educated than you that are in polygamous marriage, so just reserve your ignorant quips appropriately
So a woman is selfish if she doesn't want to be the 2nd,3rd or even 4th wife? How logical. The man taking all these wives to himself most be the most generous man in the world. Can't you have one wife and don't cheat with women outside? For me i don't really see the difference between cheating and a polygamous marriage.

24 Likes

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Idrismusty97(m): 12:56pm On Feb 17, 2017
Reallymilky:


Are u kidding me? U define sanity in women as hating polygamy? Polygamy ain't the problem,its the parties involved that bastardized the concept.i am sane and sensible and I'll consider polygamy but with conditions.
What conditions? Allah permits polygamy as you all said. You have no right to make any more conditions other than what the Almighty Allah permits. The facts that you have conditions for polygamy shows that you are one of the sane and sensible lady i am talking about.

4 Likes

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Idrismusty97(m): 12:58pm On Feb 17, 2017
982ABU:
may almighty Allah forgive you but please if you are a muslim you need to go back to islamiyya to learn about your religion it is show totally you lack religion teaching and by the way is not necessary for some men or women to marrie if you know you can prevent yourself from committing adultry
So marrying more than a wife prevents men from adultery? It is like saying drinking even more beers prevent you from getting drunk. This is likened to Allah making adultery legal in order to prevent the same adultery.

24 Likes

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Souljaboi1: 1:07pm On Feb 17, 2017
ednut1:
because the condition for taking another wife cannot be met ie love them equally which is not possible


Loving them equally is not a condition for marrying more than one wife.

Being just with regards to their individual needs is the condition.

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Omudia11: 1:32pm On Feb 17, 2017
No...you're the one who doesn't understand. If you can't love those women equally, you also will not do things equally for them. You will do one whole heartedly but the others grudgingly which is sin.
Deeypeey:

do u love even ur parents equally?
if u don born...answer truthfully...deep down in ur heart,u know dere s bound to be a "favourite child"
.
.
buh d point is to treat dem all equally..never to let them know u love one more than the other...
if u think u can handle it... go ahead and marry as much as four wives if u can...just remember to treat theam equally...cos if u dnt,there s a punishment fr u
its a choice..not an obligation...critics dnt seem to understand that

14 Likes

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Annalise(f): 2:02pm On Feb 17, 2017
This question is kinda sorta redundant. It's the rational thing to do. Nobody likes to share. There are things we do and accept just to please Allah and secure our place in Paradise, not because we just like doing it.
Some of the major benefits of marriage are the synergy and stability of a two parent home and long term companionship. This is harder with polygamy. Polygamy of these days is not practiced with taqwa. The man will already be doing zinna with wife to be. If you like a woman, you send your people to her people, instead of secret hotel room dates. As for me, if I would go into polygamy, I would prefer 3rd or 4th wife. I would prefer the people I meet at home to be used to the lifestyle.
Also, advice for sisters going into polygamy. If you want to enjoy your marriage, find a married man who speaks well and says good things about his wife/wives at home. They make the best husbands.
Please, brothers, try to be financially buoyant before thinking of marriage. Not a prerequisite, but things will be easier for everyone. Also encourage your wives to be gainfully employed. Even if it is roasting corn in the market, just encourage them to be busy with something.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by alBHAGDADI: 2:03pm On Feb 17, 2017
Deeypeey:

do u love even ur parents equally?
if u don born...answer truthfully...deep down in ur heart,u know dere s bound to be a "favourite child"
.
.
buh d point is to treat dem all equally..never to let them know u love one more than the other...
if u think u can handle it... go ahead and marry as much as four wives if u can...just remember to treat theam equally...cos if u dnt,there s a punishment fr u
its a choice..not an obligation...critics dnt seem to understand that
There's no way you can treat your several wives equally no matter how rich you are. As long as you cant scrub all parts of your body equally when taking a bath, you cant love all your wives and care for them equally.

Lets talk about the dangers of polygamy which islamic chauvinists fail to consider. In a polygamous home, there's never peace. Even when there seem to be a semblance of peace, it is usually deceitful and short lived. All wives hate themselves and are always in competition. This alone can make them resort to charms and voodoo to outdo the others for their husband's attention. What about the children? They live by the established divide and only show love to their mother's children alone. This divide goes on till death with hatred, wickedness, distrust etc all of which turns them into menace to society. If you ever come across a child raised in polygamous family, ask such a person to tell you whether he or she loves the half-siblings produce by the father. The expression on the person's face before answering will be more than enough answer for you.

If you check closely the life of a man with many wives, you will realize that he is never happy. Struggling to please your numerous wives equally is really a daunting task that can drain your mentality and run you insane. Men are still finding it difficult coping with just one wife, yet you believe a man can live peaceful with more than one. From constant nagging to separating of fights and quarrels, the man's daily life will be a living hell for him. How about caring for the tonnes of children produced? No matter how rich he may be, in terms of affording to send them all to the same good school, there will still be a reason that will make one of the wives feel her own children are not getting as much as the others. You speak of treating the wives equally, how is that possible when a man is designed to care for his first son much more better than the rest? If he is spending a million dollars on university fees on the first child who has attained that level, don't you think it is appropriate for him to spend that same amount on the children produced by the other wives who are yet to attain university status, according to your equality rule?

Polygamy has really destroyed the society and created poverty as well as criminals. Look at all those motor pack touts aka Agbero with names like Kabiru, Mukaila, Ganiyu, Sule, musiliu etc, many of them are all from polygamous background where they got kicked out cos the burden of caring for them was too much for the man who was decieved by Allah into believe that polygamy is right. Look at the high rate of illiteracy and poverty in Northern Nigeria with the Almajiri population swelling all due to polygamy promoted by islam.

If at this point you still believe allah is right to have prescribed polygamy especially in this time and age, then i'll advice you to go ahead and marry 4 wives and see the level of pain you will cause for yourself and for that wife of your youth whom you deceived and ridiculed by marry other women. I know of a muslim man who married 4 wives. When this man grew old and was hit by stroke, all the other wives fled leaving behind the fourth wife who stood by him and took good care of him. Unfortunately, the man died afterwards. That was when the other wives returned to fight bloodily for his property. Is that the kind of end Allah wants for you?

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Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Reallymilky(f): 2:36pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
What conditions? Allah permits polygamy as you all said. You have no right to make any more conditions other than what the Almighty Allah permits. The facts that you have conditions for polygamy shows that you are one of the sane and sensible lady i am talking about.

Oh! Not the kinda conditions u have in mind...if he can be upright,unbiased and all the normal what-not specified by Islam! Ah gat nothing against polygamy if it's practiced the way Islam stipulated.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by Nobody: 2:37pm On Feb 17, 2017
Idrismusty97:
Every sane and sensible lady should hate Polygamy. Can a man share his wife with two other men? It is common sense and i feel sorry for those who happen to find themselves in polygamous marriage. But it is waning down slowing especially among the youths, Most Muslims nowadays considered polygamous marriages a burden unless the uneducated ones.
the above link is ment for situation like this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQaPBU5ppsk tanks
Re: Why Do Muslim Ladies Hate Polygamy? by vroy(m): 2:58pm On Feb 17, 2017
orisa je kin pe meji obinrin kode nu

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