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Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? - Romance - Nairaland

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Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by bobolizim(m): 11:17am On Sep 14, 2017
It's been long we've checked on each other so I saw her online on Facebook one day and we shared eachother's contact . On checking her dp on whatsapp, I saw her carry a child and I inquired from her whether she's a child and her answer to me was yes, she does .

Well, I'd considered asking her out before this occurrence but this answer of hers put me off totally . Anyways, we ended up meeting and during the course of our discussion , I probed again ; at first I wasn't sure of her answer , I was clearly obfuscated but at the end she eventually demystified my mystry . She's not with any child but then she asked me whether I could marry a lady with a child or not ? Which I hurriedly said no .

She began to tell me reasons there's nothing bad in doing that using a story of a lady who was raped by a guy she'd never fallen in love with. It's not like she didn't have the person she's dating , it just occurred that she's forced and all. Well, she made it known to her boyfriend, her predicament;hmm, it's a cliche that ''love is blind'',her boyfriend who is madly in love promised to care of her and the baby when delivered of.

Well, i have empathy for such a person but my answer is still no. It's not like I'm selfish but I'd not train a child that'd eventually become someone else amongst ample reason.

Hence, I'd like to know whether you can marry a lady or guy with a child ?

8 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Gmasterp(m): 11:23am On Sep 14, 2017
Depends...Its not like i'm a virgin myself,i am just smart enough to wear a rubber...

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by bobolizim(m): 11:27am On Sep 14, 2017
Gmasterp:
Depends...Its not like i'm a virgin myself,i am just smart enough to wear a rubber...
grin.... lol, it's not like ladies can't prevent pregnancy too whilst having sex . There're myriads of family planning .

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by VeeBuzzer(f): 11:30am On Sep 14, 2017
That's a tricky question cos love really is blind, and fate can be so funny and set you up to fall in love with a single man/woman when you never harbored such idea or plan.

For me, it depends on the situation. I don't like the idea of marrying a man who has a kid with someone else, it brings unnecessary stress and complications in life.

56 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Gmasterp(m): 11:32am On Sep 14, 2017
bobolizim:
grin.... lol, it's not like ladies can't prevent pregnancy too whilst having sex . There're myriads of family planning .
true Buh then one can mistake...then there is rape or even teenage curiousity!!
Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Papiikush: 11:33am On Sep 14, 2017
VeeBuzzer:
That's a tricky question cos love really is blind, and fate can be so funny and set you up to fall in love with a single man/woman when you never harbored such idea or plan.

For me, it depends on the situation. I don't like the idea of marrying a man who has a kid with someone else, it brings unnecessary stress and complications in life.
Love is blind. Marriage is an eye opener.

Be advised.

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by bobolizim(m): 11:34am On Sep 14, 2017
VeeBuzzer:
That's a tricky question cos love really is blind, and fate can be so funny and set you up to fall in love with a single man/woman when you never harbored such idea or plan.

For me, it depends on the situation. I don't like the idea of marrying a man who has a kid with someone else, it brings unnecessary stress and complications in life.
but is love really blind ? Does that mean when one is in love with someone , it's hard to distinct the good they do and the bad ? Does that mean one can't bring oneself to stop loving them ?

In any circumstances , should one compromise one's standard on the basis of fate ?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by bobolizim(m): 11:41am On Sep 14, 2017
Papiikush:

Love is blind. Marriage is an eye opener.

Be advised.

why does it seem like those in marriage do not exhibit the love is blind cliche ? Or does that mean they stopped being in love cause they're now married ? Why's this love's blind cliche common amongst those in relationships?

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by VeeBuzzer(f): 11:43am On Sep 14, 2017
Papiikush:

Love is blind. Marriage is an eye opener.

Be advised.


True. I sometimes feel like marriage is the destroyer of love.

16 Likes

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 11:46am On Sep 14, 2017
If I really love the person, I can marry him, even though am the jealous type and I don't like to share.



But it might be tough, babymama drama is not funny and there will always be this connection between your husband and the babymama. E no easy.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by VeeBuzzer(f): 11:46am On Sep 14, 2017
bobolizim:
but is love really blind ? Does that mean when one is in love with someone , it's hard to distinct the good they do and the bad ? Does that mean one can't bring oneself to stop loving them ?

In any circumstances , should one compromise one's standard on the basis of fate ?

You should understand no one is perfect, so if you begin searching for good and bad, you will stay single forever cos no one can be perfect enough for us. It just boils down to tolerance and compromise. What can you not tolerate and what can you tolerate because you love someone? When you know your limits, then you will know if you can go that extra mile with the person.

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Victornezzar: 11:50am On Sep 14, 2017
Never

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by phintohlar(f): 11:51am On Sep 14, 2017
Yes & No.. Yes if the mother is no more (which i actually don't pray for) and no if she's still on dis planet, cos we women get wahala ehn and me no fit dey run upandwn dey find wetin no lost over children as she'll want her child to always be at the top been the 1st child..

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 11:53am On Sep 14, 2017
No! I can't.

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Papiikush: 11:55am On Sep 14, 2017
bobolizim:
why does it seem like those in marriage do not exhibit the love is blind cliche ? Or does that mean they stopped being in love cause they're now married ? Why's this love's blind cliche common amongst those in relationships?

Love is never enough to sustain marriage.

VeeBuzzer:


True. I sometimes feel like marriage is the destroyer of love.
No, it strengthens love.

It's just that Sometimes people wonder to themselves during misunderstanding "why did I even marry this guy/babe in the first place" (reason I mentioned marriage being an eye opener).

It reveals your partner's true identity. Now you've got to deal with that for the rest of your life.

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 12:21pm On Sep 14, 2017
Victornezzar:
Never
Never say never.

1 Like

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Victornezzar: 12:23pm On Sep 14, 2017
TGoddess:
Never say never.
why
I can't do that oo
Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by vetrovialMan(m): 12:32pm On Sep 14, 2017
An emphatic yes

4 Likes

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 12:37pm On Sep 14, 2017
Victornezzar:
why I can't do that oo
What if you're the single parent?

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by iamdynamite(m): 12:45pm On Sep 14, 2017
Why not, see marrying a brand new gal wont guarantee a happy home, so what is the fuss about afterone, as they are popularly called.

she has a child not a disease, so therefore if i love her and she loves me too the child wont be an issue for me.

26 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Victornezzar: 1:05pm On Sep 14, 2017
TGoddess:
What if you're the single parent?
It won't even happen
Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by adajoe555: 1:08pm On Sep 14, 2017
I can everyone got a past

5 Likes

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by bamisepeters(m): 1:11pm On Sep 14, 2017
We all know what we want, i will still go on with the relationship, she has a child doesn't make her bad. Love is stupid you know!

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Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 1:18pm On Sep 14, 2017
Victornezzar:
It won't even happen
Right.

1 Like

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Nobody: 1:38pm On Sep 14, 2017
grin grin

" On checking her dp on whatsapp, I saw her carry a child and I inquired from her whether she's a child and her answer to me was yes, she does "

- Useless inquiry shocked

"I was clearly obfuscated but at the end she eventually demystified my mystry ."

- Poor sentence construction and useless vocabulary..who do you want to impress undecided

38 Likes

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by kdotpaul: 1:38pm On Sep 14, 2017
marrying single mom without HIV/STDs is better than marrying a lady who has aborted pregancy or HIV/STDs carrier

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by EkeneElectrons(m): 1:39pm On Sep 14, 2017
No
Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by adexang0: 1:39pm On Sep 14, 2017
OK in other words you are asking if we can marry a baby mama or a baby papa?



It depends sha
Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Factfinder1(m): 1:39pm On Sep 14, 2017
Hell no...no matter how much you try or pretend you will never ever love that child like you love your kids and at some point you will show clear partiality

6 Likes

Re: Can You Marry A Lady Or Guy Who Already Has A Child? by Oluwasaeon(m): 1:39pm On Sep 14, 2017
Yes!

2 Likes

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