In Nigeria, you don't take business decisions without a backup plan.

Hold on to your job sir...

JAPA if you really desire to.... Stay back too if you don't see any need to JAPA...

Everyone is free to do whatever they wish!!

I have seen those who Jappa with no plans or skills and end up living terrible life over there

There are also people who stays back and makes good income monthly (like 700k to #1m) in this same Nigeria.

Finally, do whatever suits your desire

Greatmind653:
Pls, if you don't really understand this post, don't comment please. If you're gender bias, pls, read and ignore.

Good morning kind hearted people in the house. Pls, I need honest and matured advice from experience and knowledgeable people in the house.

How can I train my sons especially my 11yrs old boy into a good, respectful, well behaved young man in a situation where he constantly see his father in gambling addiction, and the house is not always peaceful because of this?

How can I make them believe that the fact that their father does not provide anything for them nor anything in the house, does not mean they're not good enough?
My son has learnt the habit of not asking his Dad for anything no matter how little because he knows the answer already. He would rather starve than ask him for anything. Every of his needs, he will patiently wait for me.

I practically provide everything in the house and he knows. Infact my husband and my two sons can be in the house hungry for the whole day if I'm not around.
Any money he has is strictly for betting. He wouldn't even use it to feed himself not to talk of his children.
He eat anything I provide in the house without him providing. Most times it's very annoying.
Most times, we don't talk to each other in this house, yet anything I cook, he must eat.
I'm trying my best, because I can't watch my kids go hungry or stay without light, water, TV subscriptions and the rest. But once he's holding TV remote, no one dare change the channel.

How can I train well behaved young boys in a home like this? I'm so lonely and worried for my children too.

I'm no longer traumatized by his gambling addiction, because I have tried everything, and it didn't work if this is the life he wants, then fine.

I'm traveling with my two boys for the Christmas and I intend to stay in my family house for a very long time. Maybe not to return back here.
This house, I shoulder the house rent, all the bills all for the sake of my children. I don't want a broken home. I don't want my children growing up lonely without the presence of their both parents. But, am I doing the right thing here?
My husband has refused to change for years. all efforts, complain, family intervention all failed.
He's been in gambling even before we got married. I have endure for so long and I'm scared if what I'm enduring really worth it.

I've given up either.

Am I making my children better by staying together here or they could be better when we're apart?
Anyone experience this before?

What's the right thing to do here?

Until our government wake up from their slumber to regulate these betting hubs here and there...

Gambling is wrecking homes, sending able men to debts.... Gambling is a bloody addiction...

That man won't change, a fool at 40 is almost a fool forever...

Take your kids far away and accept your fate to Carter for them till adulthood

.

Ensa777:
Men be doing men.
When older men marry 20s girl,who will 20s and 30s men marry?

Where's the bro code in this?

That is why men will always develop themselves to acquire wealth and power because they will always look attractive.....

Ladies should ensure they get picked earlier 30 and below because once they cross 35 years.... Only very few men look their way

phemy36:


You waste your precious time replying that attention seeker instead of you to read and pass. The first lady I married do more than what this one is doing. Their type want to make man look stupid. The best way to deal with them is to totally ignore them. She's begging me to make her my second wife now. But the ship has already sail. If my present wife misbehave, I will send her packing. She behave herself because she knows the kind of person I am. I no dey take shit from them unto feeding, shelter and establishing you, you go dey give me wahala. Who does that. No time to waste time.

Wooow.... This is exactly what most women needs... Serious iron hand

vazsily:
No be if she gree sit down! My matter dey really complicated. Things are expensive now and it's not funny. She no dey hear. Na to run dey my mind. Bcoz at the rate we dey go na BP remain for me. How do I even make her understand. She go market comes back and nah over cooking. I go the market, same thing. If say these kids are already grown, I swear I will walk away.

Sir, you're not a kid in this game of marriage .... For crying out loud, your marriage is 15years.

Just sit and device a means of talking sense into the woman. Reduce by 50% the amount you give her, gradually she go receive sense.

The brain of most women na one way traffic

Goalnaldo:
Recently I fell in love for the first time with this 23 year old. It felt great. this was the first time someone is calling me baby and having sleepless nights because of me (before you people begin to ask how old I am, I was born in 1992).

About three days ago we were texting on WhatsApp and I asked her how many ex she had had and her reply was "I can't remember". I was shocked 😲 I asked her if there are too many that's why she can't remember and she said "yes".

I'm concerned.for a 23 year old to have dated many men means she has multiple body counts. Will this affect me in the long run? What advice do you people have for me?

PS; I'm not a virgin

Uncle at your age you're taking a 23 year old serious

She will only call you pet names to leverage on you for cash gift and other stuffs, and of course you will have her pussy but let me tell you

You're just living in a fool's paradise, her brain is not formed yet for anything serious, you're just to Bleep her and move on.... Before she begins to take a man serious starts from 27 to 28 years of age.

I repeat never take such girl serious, she's still in her Bleep-around stage, if you look well you're not the only man in her life....

They are everywhere, looking around for who you carry their burden financially until they get much older

Foreign or naija

Price?

This world and problems sef....

Lolz.... Sope otilo!!!!

Salaries that have always drop into the pockets of their ogas while in office

Baba wants to finally pack the 12,000 Nigerians back home from Germany

His 3rd leg has finally sent him to prison... Too bad, every single young man as a matter of fact should have full control over their sexuality

spy24:
Na freedom of expression from childhood dey cause all this thing.

They will always blame it on mental health, but their upbringing makes them have weak mental resistance to adversity...

Talk say you get mental health issues take try nonsense for Nigeria. Your eyes go clear, the worst you can do is suicide, which is still bad

This is why it pays to train up your child in Nigeria up to the age of 18 before relocating abroad.

God help our relations over there in the state

The ladies here can't even drop comments all because of shame ....

Instead of those ones with sense among them to call their fellow women to order but no, they prefer to watch how useless their gender is really looking...

If things continue this way, men won't take an average woman serious for anything anymore....

Just to entice with sweet words, do mad sex, when tired, kick out and move on to another

Clocking 37 alone as a single man should bother you as a father....

To God be the glory he found his feet.... Wicked parents like you are still around in every state in Nigeria.

If you're in that age range and still trying to find your feet and also praying to settle down, may your dream come true.... Amen

Germi9:
There are eligible men in Nigeria

True but what marriageable ladies face these days is that "Dicks are everywhere (even if they want 10 per day) but you see that thing called commitment is actually scares to find"

Nengiraw:
Thank you. I have actually already blocked him, because for the life of me, my mental can’t deal with a lot of things surrounding him, even if I decide to marry him, I don’t know how the first wife will feel, cause I know that she will definitely still be in his life, because of their daughter, who still stays with the mother, and he has her on the weekend. He even started comparing me and the wife, saying that I look more attractive than her, so now she is ugly. I just felt it was childish of him, and I don’t want a man like that to be my husband

Aunty, it's obvious you have too much time for nonsense from men...

That man obviously want to have you and still hold down his wife....

For you to even allow him do a video call with you gives him that impression you're desperate or maybe you're considering his offer...

Just relax, your man will find you soonest...

One love!!

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

If you stay and give her some space, the kids won't really be affected.

Divorcing her will destroy a lot especially the psyche of the children...

If you stay alone, will this suddenly quench this sex drive of yours

Oga sir, don't use your own hand to destroy what you've built for years.

10, 20 years from now, your joystick won't even stay awake on the sight of a pretty lady ....

Uncle just embrace your woman and accept her the way she is... She has given you kids, taken care of your home and even stay loyal to you...

What crime has she committed now for you to have such terrible plans for her?

SEX IS NOT FOOD... At least she gave it to you and to have those lovely kids... THINK ABOUT ALL THESE MR OGA

No wonder our ladies are almost walking naked this days

Because they know some of you men will always look for where to dig deep your third leg

Almost all young girls around are big time into hook up.... The boobs and ass are for biggest bidders now..

The question is 10 years from now when the standing breeze has fallen flat, what will be feeding these girls o?? Since many has no other skills to put money on their table

These guys were warned about this demonic job scheme years back... The terms of agreement was even too crazy

200 girls taken just like that for sex refreshment for over 7years..... They've been used left right and center... I guess the animals are just tired of them already after all of them had given birth to babies..

By now they will be strategizing to abduct more fresh pussies

Very very hilarious

aylagos:
I don’t think you need the car now considering your age and you are still in school plus you are not looking at buying new car but Nigeria used, this show that you don’t really have the money to spare I will advise your to invest your money wisely don’t go for liability for now.

I knew someone will say this.... It's his money let him buy whatever he wishes to buy... As long as he is 18 and above, he's an adult

These ones saw 6m they took off what if they now get to see 600million?? No to kill everybody for the faculty

Deenillah:
I'll just go straight to it.

My girlfriend of 2years gets upset when I don't apologize even when I'm not at fault. , saying I don't care about her feelings.

I'm this person who believes that everyone is responsible for their actions and should shoulder the consequences for thier actions.

I don't apologize except when I know I'm wrong and I try as much as possible to avoid things that will make me apologize unnecessarily except of course for the ones that happen coincidentally.

But she wants it to be that at every little instance, I apologize even if she's at fault which to me I find unacceptable and this causes quarrels between us when it happens.


MY QUESTION IS

Am I wrong to want to apologize ONLY when I'm at fault?

You shouldn't be asking this question in the first place bros...

Immediately a lady knows that her man gets so much carried away by her pretty face and sexy body, they tends to blackmail you emotionally...

If she's wrong, she should tender an apology, if not discuss it with her and if she's being dramatic about it then do your thing as a man....

Never allow yourself to be a simp over a woman.... They will show you shege

Nataliace:
The younger brother to my husband occasionally comes to visit us. My husband takes good care of him and support his business dealings.

He trusts his brother that he can travel for weeks leaving us together.

Recently my brother in-law's movement towards me changed.

He sometimes rub his hands on my back as if he was just being friendly. He made strange and unusual move towards me several times and I was uncomfortable with that.

I warned him that if he doesn't stop I will report to my husband.

My husband travelled last week and his brother has begun his behaviors of unexpectedly touching my body and showing up in my room or just following me to the kitchen whenever I am preparing meal.

I thought of reporting to his brother but I don't want to be the reason they will be enemies for life.

How do I stop him so this remain between two of us?

This is sincerely becoming unbearable.

Aunty dick is dick and one might be brain shagging than the other.... Issues like is requires a quick responds as e dey hot...

Do a video or audio of him whenever he approaches you and then report him immediately both to your husband and even your husband's family...

Once his dick enters you, sope otilo especially of he's a lion in bed

You are finished!!

you will keep saying please leave me meanwhile his dick is performing wonders inside of you...

You don't start avoiding a dick after it enters you.... You do all you can not to allow it penetrate the first time... Because if you allow the man to roll it in...

That's the end, to avoid it will be pretty difficult

Babe1994:
I’m working, I’m doing averagely okay. I can do better which I’m striving towards at the moment. Having a child really set me back but I’m getting there. The most important thing is that I have money coming in every month and I have a very supportive family.

Babe, thank God you've got something doing which brings in money monthly...

Take a decision to get your own apartment and move in with your son. That man will not change!!

Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like what's happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.

He only felt you didn't mediate in the whole wedding thing to at least see how you can pacify popsi to be lenient with your man.

Just calm down, laugh over the whole thing, and focus on your own job, for a month or two try to help him out on his responsibility at home. See if you can ask him the entire loan amount and if you can take it upon your self to offset maybe 10% of it for him.

Let him know, you appreciate all that he did and he only did all that because he truly loves you. As time goes on he will be fine and gradually forget the whole thing.

Bobbiee:
Yoruba people will keep offing themselves in interesting ways. The punishment will keep following them and taking them out one by one. Misery has become them.

It's obvious you hate the yorubas keep the fire of hate burning in your heart....

ALMUSTAQIM:
The debts are high
Pressure increasing by the days
Hope and Pray I won't do same soon.


God bless Nigeria

Haaaa!! For you to type this, definitely so many things are going on in your head... Please hang on, things will be fine soonest... Shoot me a mail here tideal20@gmail.com lets discuss. Things will be done

skj1377:
I married at 37yrs if I new I would wait till 47yrs.

This is serious o... But may God keep giving you the strength