My Husbands neice actually. She has stayed with us for a while. My Husband says No, but she presented her case well to me, she promises to only use email and bb chat which I can monitor.
She is 16, had great Jamb and SSCE Results, works hard and is industrious, she makes snacks and drinks like sobo and kunu and sells in the neighborhood shop, she gives the guy a commission, she has 10k saved.
My husband feels she should put the money to better use, her parents feel I spoil her. I feel she has done enough to earn something she desires.
Right now am the only one who feels its a good idea. She is very responsible.
I trust her Judgement. We talk a lot and are very open with each other.

What does your husband want her to do with the money?

debrief08: My Husbands neice actually. She has stayed with us for a while. My Husband says No, but she presented her case well to me, she promises to only use email and bb chat which I can monitor.
She is 16, had great Jamb and SSCE Results, works hard and is industrious, she makes snacks and drinks like sobo and kunu and sells in the neighborhood shop, she gives the guy a commission, she has 10k saved.
My husband feels she should put the money to better use, her parents feel I spoil her. I feel she has done enough to earn something she desires.
Right now am the only one who feels its a good idea. She is very responsible.
I trust her Judgement. We talk a lot and are very open with each other.

Raising a child is not all about punishing them . . . It's good to reward them also!

From what you've said, she really deserves getting what she wants. I know a lot of younger kids who doesnt lift a finger and yet own expensive phones! I dont think it's spoilt them yet.

Please let her buy her BB. But monitor what she does with it.

If not, when she gets into the UNI, she'll look for a BF to buy her one.

I agree with Ujujoan. With everything you've said about her, methinks she's earned it.

Bless You Uju, same thing I have been shouting oh. Jenny Hubby wants her to keep at aside for her school as she is going to a Private University.
I told him that she earned the money and she can choose what she wants to do with it, I intend to add to her money and get her one that will last. Before she goes to school am sure she would have earned some more, she makes about 2500 every week from her sales, so she can earn more.

she is just 16 ppl, and if u think that buying a bb is d way to reward a child then think again. U can't monitor what she does wit d fone esp sites that she wil visit 2. She can do smth else with the money, as she awaits her admision in d uni, y nt enrol 2 b trained in a catering skool since she already knw d basics, it wil pay her wel in d future instead of wasting her time on net.

bb makes economic sense if you are absolutely sure the constant pinging won't derail her.
Buy the phone with strict conditions that it get's switched off at a certain time of the day.

But her parents feel it will spoil her so why get it for her?
I understand she is staying with you but still consider her parents in this decision.
Also, if she is going to uni, how do u plan on monitoring the use?

Personally, i feel once the person is old enough to enter uni the person can get a phone.
Just don't feel its right to disregard her parents and your husband just for a phone.

blank: But her parents feel it will spoil her so why get it for her?
I understand she is staying with you but still consider her parents in this decision.
Also, if she is going to uni, how do u plan on monitoring the use?

Personally, i feel once the person is old enough to enter uni the person can get a phone.
Just don't feel its right to disregard her parents and your husband just for a phone.

The parents are probably reluctant because of the cost of buying the phone not her owning a phone.
If the girl is good and hard-working then a lil reward here and there should be encouraged.

At the end of the day a girl at that age that's already saving money as well as doing side business should always be rewarded. Would you prefer she goes tagged as one of the materialistic girls us dudes are going on about?

The girl asked for something and even came with reasons why it's a good idea to get it for her. Now the bb is not simply a want, it's a need in her books.

I'd say get it without a doubt

I am with Blank on this one.

She is 16 and I think it is okay to have a phone..... BUT her parents are against her having a phone and even though she is a smart girl that lives with you, she still got her parents well and alive. I said it before that a smart kid is a smart kid and no iphone or blackberry can mess some of them up with proper monitoring though.

I have nieces I love so much and sometimes they ring me up asking me to buy them one thing or the other, in such instances I know that their parents must have turned them down so what I do is, ring their parents up and talk to them about it, they give me their reason for not wanting their girls to have what they have requested and I respect that but it is also quite difficult going back to these girls and saying no to them so what I do is give them what we call "Work Hard assignment". I tell them to try and convince their parents to let them have what they have asked and if they agree to it then I will buy it for them assuming their parents haven't bought it for them already. That way everybody is happy

nne3870: she is just 16 ppl, and if u think that buying a bb is d way to reward a child then think again. U can't monitor what she does wit d fone esp sites that she wil visit 2. She can do smth else with the money, as she awaits her admision in d uni, y nt enrol 2 b trained in a catering skool since she already knw d basics, it wil pay her wel in d future instead of wasting her time on net.

She's not a regular 16-year old. At 16 she has her own business . . . Tells me she's got more brain than most 16 yr olds!

at 16? kmt shes old enough! if she was a boy and asked for a 500pound play station now I bet your husband wont bat an eyelid!

buy her the phone and stop asking us nonsense questions mshew. . . . .

in fact a bb is even small, i suggest you accompany it with a playbook.

jennykadry: I am with Blank on this one.

She is 16 and I think it is okay to have a phone..... BUT her parents are against her having a phone and even though she is a smart girl that lives with you, she still got her parents well and alive. I said it before that a smart kid is a smart kid and no iphone or blackberry can mess some of them up with proper monitoring though.

I have nieces I love so much and sometimes they ring me up asking me to buy them one thing or the other, in such instances I know that their parents must have turned them down so what I do is, ring their parents up and talk to them about it, they give me their reason for not wanting their girls to have what they have requested and I respect that but it is also quite difficult going back to these girls and saying no to them so what I do is give them what we call "Work Hard assignment". I tell them to try and convince their parents to let them have what they have asked and if they agree to it then I will buy it for them assuming their parents haven't bought it for them already. That way everybody is happy

You are right!

@ debrief. Maybe you can talk to her parents on her behalf!

This is really tactical. If u buy d phone, she might be exposed to negative aspects of internet lives, and in d other way round, if u dnt buy it, she might feel disappointed thus Weighing her emotions down! Mayb, we shld put it to a vote. If u ar in support u click like and see how many likes we will get atleast if we can get up to 20likes, it means they should buy else, dnt buy!

Queen, very unfair conclusion, its not about gender, My Mother In law was very strict with her sons, My Husband takes after her in that direction.
Her Parents think even retouching her hair is spoiling her, I wouldn't want to say much about them but they really don't input much in her upbringing.
Her parents sometimes like to talk, if I didn't take her as I would my sister they will talk now that I have taken her as mine they still say I spoil her. She is polite, kind, helpful.
As for monitoring her in the university, I intend to trust her judgement, I have done my best in the little time I have, (over 4 years), she has grown from a rude teenager to soneone focused and goal oriented.
As for catering school, that's our responsibility, she did that when she was on break in secondary school, she is a great cook and baker, she has a great future in catering as a side business. She has told me the business side of owning a black berry, she can post pictures of snacks and drinks.
I don't intend to defy my husband but to clearly explain to him. She is not a direct niece of my Husband but was brought by her parents so she can help us out and we can train her. She was barely 12, I refused to have a little girl as help and told them so but that we will keep her and train her still.
I really try not to be negative concerning her parents

U should buy it 4 her because when u dnt bought 4 her she we get anoda means 2 buy it

She is of age ♍♈ dear. Just give her one atleast curve 2 for ∂ start

If not, her bf will buy it kia kia...

Whats all this junks flooding N/land's homepage this blog has lost focus.... see another dumb thread

I wish I had responsible inlaws like yours....
Anyway, please try and get her the phone to avoid her being enticed by all these wolves with it.

So buying a BB for a mature 16 year old is what is warranting this long talk?

And what is all this talk about 'Monitoring' her phone usage?

Jesus Christ! This is the 21st century!

Buy her white bold 5.

Abegi go sit down.

nne3870: she is just 16 ppl, and if u think that buying a bb is d way to reward a child then think again. U can't monitor what she does wit d fone esp sites that she wil visit 2. She can do smth else with the money, as she awaits her admision in d uni, y nt enrol 2 b trained in a catering skool since she already knw d basics, it wil pay her wel in d future instead of wasting her time on net.

If she needs BB get her Bread and Butter. I bet you if you encourage her, that simply means you are opening an office for her to display her wares (platform to sell her endowed gift). When she gets pregnant, ur in-laws too will give you RED card.
*women sha, wetin concern you for wetin no concern you.

Age is nothing but a number!. Get her the BB.

Besides, with or without BB she may do whatever she wants to do.

Fool.

gawk: Whats all this junks flooding N/land's homepage this blog has lost focus.... see another dumb thread

This a topic close to my heart, as I have a great daughter who's just turned 14 and totally computer literate and wanted a proper mobile phone.

Yes she too wanted a BB, but got a nice ANDROID smartphone which she's equipped with the WHATSAPP application. She has found out she could do far more with her facebook and other social media. And I dont ever have to monitor her and her phone, actively. With android, there are effective and efficient ways.

Very soon now, we would be seeing topics like..." How many rounds of sex should i have with my husband on sunday morning before church"... Pikin wei go spoil go spoil, buy it for her o, if it will make u feel better...

Go ahead and spoiled her a little.