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Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? - Family - Nairaland

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Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Ibukunjah(m): 10:47pm On Sep 28, 2012
Have you fellow nairalanders observed that the very joyous moments of many marriages, filled with anticipations for a blissful union suddenly get sour and "for better for worse" now turn to "for better for stay, for worse for go"? Are there steps to save these marriages? Please leave your comments.

5 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Ibukunjah(m): 10:51pm On Sep 28, 2012
Feel free to drop your practical and realistic views and suggestions.
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by k2039: 11:46pm On Sep 28, 2012
[size=15pt]
Most people go into marriage without preparation(the marraige you dont prepare for is doomed to fail from the onset)
I also think one reason marriages fail is because of the decline in morals and values of the concerned parties.

Marriage is a life commitment[most people desire a successful marriage but only few people are committed to a successful marriage(commitment involves both parties taking responsibility to ensure the marriage works)]
[/size]

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Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Kobojunkie: 5:31am On Sep 29, 2012
I think it is fantasy to think one can prepare for marriage. Sort of like saying one has to prepare for life. Marriage has lessons to teach you that you cannot learn anywhere else. I mean we have a culture that believes in preparing women for marriage, but even with all the preparation, the statistics when it comes to failures of marriages compares with some of the highest in the world. I think what that hints at is the fact that our culture system(at least that portion that seems to think it can prepare people for marriage)is faulty or unnecessary.

8 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Ibukunjah(m): 8:29am On Sep 29, 2012
k2039: [size=15pt]
Most people go into marriage without preparation(the marraige you dont prepare for is doomed to fail from the onset)
I also think one reason marriages fail is because of the decline in morals and values of the concerned parties.

Marriage is a life commitment[most people desire a successful marriage but only few people are committed to a successful marriage(commitment involves both parties taking responsibility to ensure the marriage works)]
[/size]


I quite agree with your view man. We must not only prepare for the wedding that lasts for only a few hours without preparing for the marriage itself. We must work together to make families work. Nigeria is among the countries having the highest divorce rate in Nigeria.

Need tips to make your marriage and relationship work? Visit www.familysuccesstips.com

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by aare07(m): 2:34pm On Sep 29, 2012
Economy Situation.
most do fails to prepare.
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by DukeNija(m): 2:40pm On Sep 29, 2012
Kobojunkie: I think it is fantasy to think one can prepare for marriage. Sort of like saying one has to prepare for life. Marriage has lessons to teach you that you cannot learn anywhere else. I mean we have a culture that believes in preparing women for marriage, but even with all the preparation, the statistics when it comes to failures of marriages compares with some of the highest in the world. I think what that hints at is the fact that our culture system(at least that portion that seems to think it can prepare people for marriage)is faulty or unnecessary.

Kobojunkie and her usual Junk.

14 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by pneumaticos(m): 2:41pm On Sep 29, 2012
untrained grand fathers or mothers gave birth to untrained fathers and mothers who inturn gave birth to untrained couple destine for divorce as they v not being trained

3 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by bejay766: 2:42pm On Sep 29, 2012
Most Marriages fail because of immaturity, selfishness and greediness.
.

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Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Iaz93: 2:46pm On Sep 29, 2012
:-XYawns..!! Yawns..!! Yawns..!!
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by bejay766: 2:47pm On Sep 29, 2012
Most Marriages fail because of immaturity, selfishness and greediness.Most couples fail to seek the face of God. Some even depend on their wealth, educational qualifications and beauty,(on the side of the Women).
.

6 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by DukeNija(m): 2:48pm On Sep 29, 2012
In a society with increased perversion, Lust, declining values, Fast life, Reverse role play, Ungodliness and the neglect of the basic principles of Marriage from the beginning, what else do you expect??

Husbands who have refused to Love their Wives with all their hearts and mind(as Christ Loved the Church and gave himself up for it) and commit to them in body and soul as one.

Wives who think their good education and new found status(thanks to the new world order) can make them equal to their husbands, thus disrespecting them and bringing unnecessary I-Know-My-Rights to her Marriage.

If You wish to find it right in Marriage, meet and ask the manufacturer and inventor of Marriages.(Read Your Bible, its his manual)

25 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by TTOPSON(m): 2:49pm On Sep 29, 2012
One of the reason why Marriages failed is because people believes in marrying whom they love instead of loving whom they married........

13 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Assalaam(f): 2:52pm On Sep 29, 2012
Most marriage fail due to lack of fear of GOD.

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Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Nobody: 2:53pm On Sep 29, 2012
Basic reason is that, people always prepare for the ceremonial aspect {wedding} and neglect the anticipation for the long term part.

3 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by 001solar(m): 2:54pm On Sep 29, 2012
Wat me I see in dis is dat most guys dey rush in to marriage just because of my friend has gotten married, dey don't really no wat it takes to start a union

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by awesomet1(m): 2:55pm On Sep 29, 2012
bejay766: Most Marriages fail because of immaturity, selfishness and greediness.
.
Seconded
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Nobody: 2:55pm On Sep 29, 2012
None of us were consulted before Marriage was constituted. You dont just impose a 1st century way of life on 21st Century people. Think of it, Bible says a woman was created because "Adam" was "lonely". 21st century 'Adams' are no more lonely, Computer games, Internet, BBM, FaceBooks etc keeps "Adam" non-lonely. So, we need to review the ideology of marriage and who ever constituted it without our collective consultation. All in favor, say 'Hi'. The "HI's" have it....Abeg na play i dey play o

5 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by OYINBOGOJU(m): 2:56pm On Sep 29, 2012
Because money has taken over love.

The love of money is the root of all evils.

The lack of money too make us evil.

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Tlake(m): 2:56pm On Sep 29, 2012
They got married for the wrong reasons,beauty n figure 8 or wealth not d important tin to look 4 in women its her intelligence and character even if d guys is 4kin up d wife will calm down cos of xter n intelligence n perhaps pray to God 4 changes viceversa with d husband dis wat marriage is abt cos sex go tire u its only respect n children dat will bound u

2 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by divinelove(m): 2:57pm On Sep 29, 2012
I think its mainly due to incompatibility lack of commitment n unconditional love. Again going into marriage when d partners r nt ready to play their roles for the marriage to work. Provider vs helpmate

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by mat2lock(m): 3:03pm On Sep 29, 2012
Marriage Marriage Marriage hmmmmm..... Marriage no be joke oooooo and he no be for pikin...... But it the sweetest when God gives u the right partner.... The SWEETEST..... Shine ur eyes, know what u want and don't chooose wrongly... That my 2cents... Shikena
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Decryptor(m): 3:03pm On Sep 29, 2012
Marriages fail because people on these days see marriage as an obligation and a norm but not a responsibility. Everybody wants to have a successful marriage but very few work towards it.

2 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by OmoAlata(f): 3:05pm On Sep 29, 2012
You also need to investigate the family you are marrying into. In some families, ALL the men end up divorcing their wives or the husbands are layabouts who don't/won't work. Why on earth would you go and pick a man from there? Or a family where all the women are beautiful witches grin grin

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Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by brownsug(f): 3:12pm On Sep 29, 2012
Most marriages fall because both sides see things on d surface,d girl sees a guy who s got swags and money,d guy sees a girl who s got fake hair and good graphics on her face and as time goes on they see d true selves,also they forget d fact dat marriage is about adpting to certain changes e g ageing,bodyshape etc

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by safarigirl(f): 3:13pm On Sep 29, 2012
A wise man once said that people prepare for weddings, not marriages. Truth is a lot of couples go into marriages without understanding the technicalities involved in being in a marriage, hence after the funfare that comes with the wedding, reality sets in and the couple drifts apart. Tolerance, trust and patience must work together, most people have none of these. The idea of live-in lovers may seem silly to most, but it could actually be smart in some instances, because in that way, a couple learn more of each other. If a person is at war with family members, there are no assurances that he/she won't take the battle to their marriage. Self-centered people may not be able to keep a home in the end, if you can't sacrifice, forget marriage.

3 Likes

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Jephyard(m): 3:17pm On Sep 29, 2012
The reason for marriage failure in nigeria is the decline in moral value, changing times such as the environment, tech, social norms n soemhow the economy. What we should doing is reajusting and adapting to what that work for each individual n learning from ppl success n mistakes in marrige.
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by pinky21(f): 3:22pm On Sep 29, 2012
This days girls don't look for qualities such as God fearing instead dey look out for style"swag"and money. Ladies re no longer submisive unlike our mothers. FOR D GUYS. A slim beauty does nt make a good wife. Men don't look beyound d shape and face. D rison marriages fail is because d shape goes off after 3 boys "winks" dey can't continue cos of lack of love

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by Nobody: 3:23pm On Sep 29, 2012
Marriage is a convenant between you, your spouse and GOD. If the communication between this three keeps flowing, the convenant called marriage will stand. But most of the time people involve, remove GOD after they have gotten into marriage, and any marriage without the chief enforcer will definately fail.
No matter what happens in marriage, stay with GOD,it will never, I repeat, never fail.

1 Like

Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by siddiq202(m): 3:25pm On Sep 29, 2012
mat2lock: Marriage Marriage Marriage hmmmmm..... Marriage no be joke oooooo and he no be for pikin...... But it the sweetest when God gives u the right partner.... The SWEETEST..... Shine ur eyes, know what u want and don't chooose wrongly... That my 2cents... Shikena
what age can one think of getting married? 50
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by EzePromoe: 3:25pm On Sep 29, 2012
[size=15pt]
Most people go into marriage without preparation(the marraige you dont prepare for is doomed to fail from the onset)
I also think one reason marriages fail is because of the decline in morals and values of the concerned parties.

Marriage is a life commitment[most people desire a successful marriage but only few people are committed to a successful marriage(commitment involves both parties taking responsibility to ensure the marriage works)]
[/size]
cool
Re: Why This Rise In Marriage Failure? by jobaskia(m): 3:26pm On Sep 29, 2012
@as-salam U are quite right that fear of God is a key to ensure that marriage is sustained, but in another sense a woman is the big 'factor' to make sure her marriage to anyone should be based on how she is a able to persevere and endures the challenges that comes with marriages.

For instance, when my nikkah was just six days i was relieved from my position where i worked , but i felt undaunted and decided to move , i kept it a secret between myself and my sister not to disclose to anyone. I equally ensure i was not remorsed on the nikkah day ,the officiating alfa spent just an hour to solemnize the two of us , a lot of friends/ were very surprise they like this kind of nikkah ceremony i only told my father in- law after i got another job with a company because i know the psychological impact it will have on my wife . I ensure my parent did'nt spill the beans as well. My marriage is moving to 7th year now ,but no be beans oh . All Glory to God

In all, i strongly believed is our women to salvage, persevere and endure within the period to ensure that they do not listen to side talk, mingle with friends, they should be patient, to be contented with whatever their spouse gives them . Women are quite loving , respectable, wise and they could be gullible but still have other qualities one can really appreciate them for. Like my parent now have been married for the past 56yrs with 8 surviving children and we are all doing very well .

Its a milestone to achieve, but with the right woman, God's guidance,everything is at your beck and call.

5 Likes

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