I'm 31 and my lady is 37. we have been together for over 7 years, she is a wonderful lady but very POSSESIVE. the problem is how do i break away from her. we are both comfortable. She have always wanted us to get married but i ve always insisted in us having children before any marriage.

she has not been able to get pregnant for me since we have been together.

I have gone for test and i'm ok. she refuse going for test claiming being a born again. the problem is i find it difficult to get serious with another lady.

HELP PLEASE

just get another babe,
and let her know about it,
or better still tell her point blank
I NO DE DO AGAIN! PERIOD!

So for the past six years, you did not know she was not good enough for you or she was possessive. its now you also realize, she hasn't gotten pregnant for you or she is that and this. Some men ehhh, na wa.
Just be truthful and say, she has become too old for you and your looking for a way out.


My advice to you, simply tell her the truth and break it off. but remember you can't eat and have your cake.

why the abuse. we dont know all the story here but insult is already flying. why cant you talk to this man like he was your brother or friend?

joshjosh:

why the abuse. we don't know all the story here but insult is already flying. why can't you talk to this man like he was your brother or friend?

You guys should learn to read the difference between abusing, insulting and saying it the way it is. i only told him the blunt truth.

you must be exceptionally clever dear sister. to just get your truth from this story.

hope you saw this in his write up?

I have gone for test and i'm ok. she refuse going for test claiming being a born again. the problem is i find it difficult to get serious with another lady

How Do I Pay My Girl Of 7 Years Off.
« on: Today at 03:34:39 PM » 

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I'm 31 and my lady is 37. we have been together for over 7 years, she is a wonderful lady but very POSSESIVE. the problem is how do i break away from her. we are both comfortable. She have always wanted us to get married but i ve always insisted in us having children before any marriage.

she has not been able to get pregnant for me since we have been together.

I have gone for test and i'm  ok. she refuse going for test claiming being a born again. the problem is  i find it difficult to get serious with another lady.

HELP PLEASE
 

no fuss. i just find it funny that people can no longer ask for anything here without someone wanting to shut them down as fast as they write.

for a 31yrs old man to come here must be a though thing. all he wants is advice. dont you think?

why should she have a baby outside wedlock?
yea i might not agree with her not going for a test. but i don't see why she should be crucified just because she doesn't want to do something. she doesn't believe in

@poster,simply talk with her.tell her you want a baby before wedlock or there wud be no marriage.be sure you can deal with whatever comes from it anyway and goodluk to both of you.

if she's a 'bornagain' why is she having sex but not taking tests??

@poster
Your story get too many k-legs. Both of you are worng and are both playing the same games with each other.

Good luck! U are both enjoying eachother hence y you find it difficult to get serious with another lady.

thanks

if she's a 'bornagain' why is she having sex but not taking tests??

i was beginning to wonder if some people were getting some more detailed info that was not clear here.

i get worried when i see people who claim to be religious but hate following the rules. born again sister here in another thread a born again brother wants another girl to sleep with him.

show us the fruits not the labels

I believe she is hiding some facts from you,

At 37, she should be the one more concerned about having a baby! - Bornagain or not

what is the matter with you oga?

the bobo is looking for opportunity to dump her and get a younger lady cant you see that?
it is so amazing naja haje, you and my woman said exactly the same thing.

bro Go help you. if you have another 7yrs to freeze relationship wise dontgo and seek counsel.

by the way you go to church too?

This is wickeddddddddddd.

what is wicked? The dude said she should go for medical test to figure out the reason she can't get pregnant

she refuses because she is 'born again' ?? but she is shagging the man day in day out.

If a woman is not ready to go for a test to figure out why she can't conceive, why on earth should he stick with her for a frivolous reason like she's 'born again'? abeg wetin concern born again with medical test?

If he wants to have kids and she isn't ready to do what is necessary to find the problem, then he is not being selfish, maybe there are some secrets she is hiding from him that would be discovered in a medical test. As far as I'm concerned, he has every right to leave her.

@ POSTER
, is that the end or just the begining of the story, ?

Its insulting that you are considering paying her off casually after 7 years.
It is even more irritating that you think any woman should be obliged to have a baby for you outside wedlock.

@poster, u said both of u hav been 2gether 4 7yrs and yet u still dont understand urselves, u shud b able to gain her confidence maybe there is sumtin she is not tellin u, so try and talk it out wit her y d test is important and if she still refuses to understand, i am afraid maybe she is having a problem wit child bearing so u ll hav to look for another option except if u know u can contend wit not hav ur own biological child.

Do you want to marry her because of kids or because you love her?

I don't understand how going for test and being born again defies each other. Meanwhile she did not see sleeping with you as a sin. Please tell her to stop deceiving herself.

chikibaybi:

Do you want to marry her because of kids or because you love her?

If she herself loves him she will go for the test unless she's hiding something.

spoilt:

Its insulting that you are considering paying her off casually after 7 years.
It is even more irritating that you think any woman should be obliged to have a baby for you outside wedlock.

Oh yes she obliged. It's not irritating to her going by this

she has not been able to get pregnant for me since we have been together.

if not why don't she walk away from the relationship.

@poster


The only thing I do not like about your whole plan is the "pay off" part.  Did you have a contract?  Are you owing her some kind of "wages" for her "services'?

I appreciate when people do not want things or people around them, and they speak up or do something about the situations as soon as possible.  It is your personal wellbeing and future happiness you are sharing with us and I can only respect that.

Having said that, If you want her to have babies with you before marriage, then fine.  Otherwise, once there is no meeting of the minds, you guys should not be together.

If I were a guy, I would want to "test" my girl pal too to make sure she can give me what I want. 


Like I was[b] heavily[/b]---infact[b] severely [/b] tested too!   So you see I am not partial at all.  Do what makes you happy and goodluck!

NaJa HaJe:

if she's a 'bornagain' why is she having sex but not taking tests??

he he he he he he he he he he heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!!!! Laff wan finisheee me!

Like you do not know how deceptive woman can be--especially the so-called born again ones.   Well, to answer your puzzling question, it is because like ALL born agains before or after they became born again, again, again, again and again---Man/Woman SHALL not and NEVER live by bread alone.

I sure can't and I ain't trying to either!

Happy SuperBowl Sunday!  It's great to be an American!

nimbus:

I believe she is hiding some facts from you,

At 37, she should be the one more concerned about having a baby! - Bornagain or not

I think she has been practicing "withdrawal" or "rhythm" methods--to protect her matronly "born-again" status.  So she can wear a "white" garment on her wedding day.

No one is God but for heaven's sake if she can't have kids--there is usually a reason.  To hide behind one kind of redundant hogwash of self gratifying scriptures just does not cut it at all.

If I were a guy I would want to be able to choose ma own "old cargo".  Especially a truly "God sent"-----Ovularia God-Give alias 4:30--kind of an old cargo. Fit for "Chief Zeburrudia" himself.  Woe betides any one who is stuck with an "old cargo" packaged by the devil himself!

He is better off a dead man!

If this guy wants her off cos she is possessive , i dnt mind , but cos she cant give him a baby, oh pleaze, if u loved her u woulda married her long b4 now n u shouldnt b wanting a baby b4 marriage. Prolly its ur baby hunting that pushed her to being possessive. What happened to adoption ? Anyway i think she should still go for a test , but all this should happen after marrige abegi.

Na wa O!
Abeg @poster, what kind of test did you go for to know you are OK? Abi you don give woman belle?

Could you give her back 7 years of her life?

jandbaby:

Na wa O!
Abeg @poster, what kind of test did you go for to know you are OK? Abi you don give woman belle?

That must be it.

I dont thin most of us are taking this post seriously

if he says she's posessive it just mens that she's caging him which is 'understandable' they have been dating 7 years and she's 37yrs.
i mean if they broke up now, where will she go from there

its sad that people are not true when they are in relationships, marriage should be a choice not a compulsion.

if he says he has checked himself out PEOPLE it generally means he has been to the doctors and done the regular fertility tests for men (e.g sperm count)
he doesnt need to get some one pregnanat

whether they are having sex or not is not the issue

The real issue is that the lady in question is not concerned about her fertility- it just sounds fishy.She should see her gynaecolgists so that they do not spend endless nights married wondering whether they will ever have children
Hubby will just resent her forever and whatever marriage she ever thot she would have will fall apart

For pete's sake she is 37yrs old!! fertility is a an issue if at least one partner wants children. he should not go into the marriage blind

A sensible post from Salsera

The guy is asking how to pay off a lady after a 7 year relationship. This question alone makes me suspect the real motive. Besides we have only heard his own side of the story and I'm taking the whole story at face value. What sane woman would not want to go for fertility test at 37? That sounds very farfetched and makes the whole tale fishy to me.

just say she is too old for u and i will agree with u
besides,are u supposed to put her in the family way b/4 getting married to her?
but i'm still wondering what being born again has to do with going for test

anyway,u've got to be polite in telling her off if u have 2 cos 7 years is not a joke
goodluck