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Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? - Culture (12) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Culture / Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? (21070 Views)

Poll: Yes or no?

Yes: 75% (78 votes)
No: 25% (26 votes)
This poll has ended

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Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by pahtahkee: 5:51am On Feb 21, 2008
romeo:

The above in bold clearly shows that you're indeed an empty barrel, I knew what i was writing when i said perplexed!!
English teacher tell me what is wrong in that statement? to be puzzled by someones idiotic view is now a big statement?

Perplexed = puzzle, mystify, bewilder, confound
Puzzled= To ponder over a problem in an effort to understand it

Empty barrels make bigger noise!! shameless Idiot tongue, You're not ashamed of yourself? you started waiting for me since 2006 and you're still threatening to start with me cheesy

I will still inflict another wound on your poor soul, idiot
You are even trying to justify your baloney! You must be rich in foolishness. Look here dingbat, get yourself out of the gutter, upgrade to the level of how a sane man can talk. You are one of the reasons why the world thinks the African man is stupid at often times.

How can you be troubled over the views of a person you have time and over stated that to be a slowpoke. If you want to throw yabs, please add some level of sanity/faculty to it! It does not cost you any pain to be knowledgeable with your statement rendering.

Stop being a demented super idiotic igwe!
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by romeo(m): 10:00am On Feb 21, 2008
pahtahkee:

You are even trying to justify your baloney! You must be rich in foolishness. Look here dingbat, get yourself out of the gutter, upgrade to the level of how a sane man can talk. You are one of the reasons why the world thinks the African man is stupid at often times.

How can you be troubled over the views of a person you have time and over stated that to be a slowpoke. If you want to throw yabs, please add some level of sanity/faculty to it! It does not cost you any pain to be knowledgeable with your statement rendering.

Stop being a demented super idiotic igwe!

Must you use dingbat, oaf or gutter in every post? abeg change dictionary fuckwit !!
That the people around your world see you as a stupid African does not mean that you should extend that to every African, My brother don't let them do that to you!! but we all know that you're overtly stupid

I don't know the shit that makes you so dumb but the shit works

I am concerned because this is a public forum and kids like yours come in here and might end up being so foolish like you
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by RDynamite(f): 4:28pm On Feb 21, 2008
Romeo, don't call my name again o. Silly boi grin
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by romeo(m): 6:42pm On Feb 21, 2008
R-Dynamite:

Romeo, don't call my name again o. Silly boi grin

Thanks mom shocked


This is the last time i will ever insult anybody or use foul language on people in this site, something good happened in my life today and i want that something good to continue wink
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by RDynamite(f): 8:01pm On Feb 21, 2008
lol. . .you got a kiss? tongue grin
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by romeo(m): 8:04pm On Feb 21, 2008
R-Dynamite:

lol. . .you got a kiss? tongue grin

LoL cheesy

Prayers can move mountain wink
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by RDynamite(f): 9:38pm On Feb 21, 2008
romeo:

Prayers can move mountain wink

Eyaa. . thank God for your miracle smiley
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Elgaxton(m): 5:31am On Feb 22, 2008
Hi Poster,

I wonder why you ask this question now that you are married. You should have asked b4 marriage.

Try to know what he likes as a person and do it for him if you can.

If you can learn the language then go ahead, it will be very nice and I believe his people(your inlaws)

will be very delighted to teach you.smiley
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by omowon: 1:48pm On Feb 23, 2008
Please do not create a problem 4 yourself when there is none
I am an Edo lady married 2 an Edo man,but i was bread and buttered in a yoruba land so i hardly can speak our language or cook all our naative dishes.
But 4 the love ,he taught me and i am doing even better than my mother in law
I think our marriagesdepend solely on what we want it to be,
Since he can go ahead and marry you and youu are willing to make him happy at all times irrespective of all your differences,it will work out .
And the plus you have is that i Igbo land even very old women can understand and speak pidgin english,so i do not smell any trouble 4 u now or later
LOVE is much more than colour or tribal differences
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by coolier(f): 12:33pm On Feb 29, 2008
DEFINITELY NO. Just answered your question.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by angel444(f): 5:32pm On Mar 02, 2008
I am a Canadian that married a Yoruba man. We have a very wonderful marriage. I cook his food, wear the traditional clothes, and tried to get to know as much as possible about his culture (including learning a bit of his local language). At the beginning of our marriage I had a lot of the same worries. He has to translate all the time to his family. Regardless, all of the love and acceptance his family has shown me, and the happiness we have in our marriage, quickly diminished any doubts. grin
He married you, cause he truly wanted to be with you. If he wanted someone that cooked the traditional food, spoke the language, and all of that he would have married that woman. But he married someone that would treat him the best and that he truly loved, and that was you smiley
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Osondust: 5:57pm On Mar 03, 2008
Dear poster,
just to comment on the issue you brought forward. I will say it depends on individual Men, there are lots of Nigerian men that can not stay with white women for life for one reason or another not just Igbo men, on the other hand you will see a Nigerian man long in marriage with a white woman. For example my father in-law is an Igbo married to an Irish women for the last 30 years.

My point is that it can go either way, get that of your mind, focus on what is good for your marriage and take each day as it comes.

thanks and good luck.

By the way I am new to this Nairaland, forgive me everyone for not introducing myself first before having a say. My name is Stephen and this is a place to be. I hope say una welcome me. smiley
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by creamdream: 8:46pm On Mar 03, 2008
yes
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by 2Legit: 11:28am On Mar 04, 2008
Yes. He'll be happy while it lasts.
It never lasts for long anyway
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Nobody: 7:22pm On Mar 04, 2008
Shun the man come marry me i be ibo man and i go take care of you and love u more than man.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by chiegemba(f): 4:15am On Mar 09, 2008
Of Course!!! "As long as dere is Love, Understandin & Trust" Also don't 4get 2 make "God" d head of d household wink smiley
***@ poster i do have spanish cousins***
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by ronkybaby(f): 2:16pm On Mar 12, 2008
No need to worry, love is stronger than all.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by JEWELoak(m): 4:30pm On Mar 13, 2008
fellow nairalanders, i just want to question yvskc .ARE U A WOMAN OR MAN? SHINE UR EYES NAIRALANDERS. DONT LET ANY ONE PLAY WITH UR OPINION .
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by JEWELoak(m): 4:35pm On Mar 13, 2008
elgaxton ur right she or he too get time to brag over childdish issues . ur marriage is what u make of it.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by CoolMrsT(f): 7:17am On Mar 15, 2008
[b][/b][color=#770077][/color] @ yvskc:

I am a white American woman very happily married to a Yoruba man. Like you I plan retirement with my husband in Naija, I have discovered a love for Africa almost as great as that for my husband ([/i]almost[i]). I am trying to learn Yoruba as well since he already speaks my language. I know how you feel when you can't be part of the conversation, though my last visit home to Lagos I DID find myself understanding & following the conversation, and surprised a good many of his family & friends by adding to the conversation ON topic, albeit in English. LOL the first time I did it you could have heard a pin drop. But like you I also wish to please my husband and learn well to make his favourite foods and have adopted traditional dress. He DOES treat me like a queen, and I am happy to do such small things to show him how much I love him. Plus, I have learnt over time that the few arguments we HAVE had were all cultural misunderstanding, every last one of them. So the better I learn his culture and what my role and his expectations of me are, the happier our home shall be. I love this man with all my heart, there is nothing I would not do to please him, or he to please me. We have a traditional marriage in that I am happy to acknowledge him as head of household, but he also accords me the respect of valuing my opinions and hearing me out, rather than just "laying down the law." By nature a multicultural relationship requires a willingness to embrace that which made us each who we are, the people we fell in love with. We are working toward establishing a blend of our cultures and traditions for our children to get the best of "both worlds" so to speak. The fact that I am part Native American is a big help, it's amazing how very similar our tribal traditions and taboos are. For our next anniversary we plan to renew our vows. We were married in Lagos in traditional Nigerian dress, which I was proud to wear for my husband -- the love shining in his eyes that day will always be in my memory. We will probably wear tradtional Nigerian wears for our renewal too (they are just too beautiful!) but we will be incorporating the traditional marriage binding cord from my tribal Nation, lovingly applied by our children. Embrace your diversity, it's part of what attracted you to each other in the first place. If he had wanted a woman who was culturally identical, he'd have married one. I wish you happiness and blessings in your life together.
A blessing from my tribe" O-owa Yeha-Noha!" (Blessings of Joy & Prosperity) from the Mohawk Nation Wolf Clan
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Flowers212: 2:51pm On Mar 15, 2008
lol THIS IS FUNNY ARE NIGERIAN MAN EVER HAPPY THATS THE QUESTION THATS SHOULD BE ASKED AS 99 PER CENT HAVE AFFAIRS, BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND I DATED AN IGBO MAN AND THE PARENTS HATED ME BECAUSE I AM AN URHOBO. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MARRY BUT THE WHOLE FAMILY JUST ATTACKED ME BECAUSE I AM NOT IGBO AND I DON'T SPEAK THE LANG. BUT I GUESS NOT ALL ARE LIKE THAT NOTTTTTT
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Flowers212: 2:54pm On Mar 15, 2008
lol THIS IS FUNNY ARE NIGERIAN MAN EVER HAPPY THATS THE QUESTION THATS SHOULD BE ASKED AS 99 PER CENT HAVE AFFAIRS, BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND I DATED AN IGBO MAN AND THE PARENTS HATED ME BECAUSE I AM AN URHOBO. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MARRY BUT THE WHOLE FAMILY JUST ATTACKED ME BECAUSE I AM NOT IGBO AND I DON'T SPEAK THE LANG. BUT I GUESS NOT ALL ARE LIKE THAT NOTTTTTT
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Scopium: 9:40am On Mar 17, 2008
Flowers212:

lol THIS IS FUNNY ARE NIGERIAN MAN EVER HAPPY THATS THE QUESTION THATS SHOULD BE ASKED AS 99 PER CENT HAVE AFFAIRS, BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND I DATED AN IGBO MAN AND THE PARENTS HATED ME BECAUSE I AM AN URHOBO. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MARRY BUT THE WHOLE FAMILY JUST ATTACKED ME BECAUSE I AM NOT IGBO AND I DON'T SPEAK THE LANG. BUT I GUESS NOT ALL ARE LIKE THAT NOTTTTTT

[size=13pt]Culture is not something to toy with when getting married. Some don't like mixing with others who don't understand their culture at all. Some of my yoruba friends tell me Ibos don't have respect because I don't bow when I greet. But seeing them do that looks stupid to me even when I'm greeted like that I don't value it, that is cultural differences. Unless you and everybody involved understands it well enough, love will just be wasting it's time[/size]
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by moots(m): 12:50am On Mar 19, 2008
Definitely a nigerian man can be happy with an english wife. Your current situation is a perfect example of how a marriage or relationship based on love and trust and respect for eachother can withstand all obstacles.

My own case is also towards the extreme, i am from the Northern part of Nigeria in a serious relationship with an Igbo lady from the Eastern part and we also come from different religious backgrounds and I was raised by a white Irish family, all her family i.e sisters, brothers, parents have willingly accepted me and cant wait for us to finalise our wedding plans. I think what also helps is that when anyone sees us its like there is something wonderful in what we have i.e our happiness, love for eachother shows outwardly.

I could never ever think of hurting a hair on her head, and I think what helps is having trust, level headedness and understanding in the relationship.

I wish you and your family all the best

regards


MOOTS
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by WebJunior(m): 5:49am On Mar 20, 2008
This question troubles me a lot as I am English (mixed race),and married to an Igbo man. He is the best,and we are in love.

Sometimes I worry that he will tire of a wife who does not speak his mother tongue.  I would also love to be able to talk to his family in Igbo and not English. In other ways I embrace the culture by cooking the food, wearing the traditional dress etc.

The answer is yes, a Nigerian man can be happy with an english wife. I'm a Nigerian man, happily married to an English woman, with 2 lovely children. Never for once has language or anything culture related been a barier in our relationship. Like yourself, my wife out of interest, asked me to teach her few words, and sentence combination, even bought some yoruba books, we both find it funny especially when translating, ? she speaks few words that she knows to the children as she wish,  never has any time been under any kind of pressure to learn my culture,

She cooks for me as well, like rice beans, plantain, etc, she even eats pounded yam,  she eats pepper and all sorts, yet she still eats all the general english foods, we both do and we understand each other perfect. We are regular customer of 805 Restaurant in old kent road,  we go to alot of Nigerian restaurants about 2wice in a month, and yet we do go pure english outing.

We love each other and the children, my mum and my wife love each other dearly as well, they do take the piss out of each other, my younger sisters and my wife get on very well, and my younger brother as well, we do exchange gifts, from uk to nigeria and vice versa.

Tho, we do have misunderstanding like every body does, but it doesn't last for long as we understand each other. And please don't take third party advices too, serious as it may be the cause of the begining of the end of your relation with your lovely man.

So, I believe a Nigerian man can be happy with his English wife.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by Blinkmama(f): 2:33pm On Dec 31, 2009
Cool Mrs. T I was reading your post and was able to relate to it entirely.  I myself am a part Native American woman married to and Ibo man.  We were married in Benin City and I feel the same way you do about my wonderful husband.  I also consider Benin my second home and cant wait to go back in 3 weeks.  My husband and I got married in the court because that is all we could afford for now.  Our traditional marriage will happen when I go back.  Did you have a problem getting your re-entry visa?  Also I am going through the whole immigration issue for him to return with me (hopefully), and i am TOTALLY confused.  I will try to extend and stick around Benin as long as I can because after having to leave him 2 weeks after we were married was horrible and is still horrible today having to wait another three weeks! (It has already been since Oct 15th that I have had to come back to the US and save money to come back because my entry visa ran out!)  We cant bare to be unwillingly seperated again.  Also the phone cards prices are so high and one card is never enough!  Im sure you know what im talking about.  If you could give me any advice, tips about immigration, moral support, ANYTHING, to help me get to my husband as fast as possible, it would be greatly appreciated.  If you want to reply to me my email is piscies26@yahoo.com,  smiley Hopefully we can have some fun stories to share with each other and some notes to compare!  Please keep in touch.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by PokerFace(f): 2:01pm On Jun 13, 2010
Yes, He can!
Learning each other's culture is not a bad idea.
Re: Can A Nigerian Man Be Happy With An English Wife? by jenn4lyfe(f): 11:09pm On Jan 05, 2012
I'm lovin this topic lol im also married to a igbo man, its true they are the best husbands and they can cook sum great meals lol stick to ur man gurl, language is not important here , Oviously he loves u, i know tht if he didnt love u he wont be wit u, 9ja men are great, all they really need is to be Loved,

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