@ Poster,
This is quite topical an issue. However, there is need to balance things up, rape shouldn come up in wedlock, Let the ladies appreciate thier hubby's sex need as well as the guys to please handle their wifes with a lot of caution and understanding.
To be candid, it takes a great maturity for a sex starved man not to misbehave, he'll either resort to wife battery or adultery or rather turn cold. And guys, give ur wifes attention n affection, they' ll jell when you need it.
The base word is LOVE which should be mutual.

@(Lady & Sweet)T, I hope you'll remember to invite us to Ijebu Ijesa, LOL

@ Da man

yes we would as soon as she says yes.

By Da Man,
@ Poster,
This is quite topical an issue. However, there is need to balance things up, rape shouldn come up in wedlock, Let the ladies appreciate their hubby's sex need as well as the guys to please handle their wifes with a lot of caution and understanding.
To be candid, it takes a great maturity for a sex starved man not to misbehave, he'll either resort to wife battery or adultery or rather turn cold. And guys, give your wifes attention n affection, they' ll jell when you need it.
The base word is LOVE which should be mutual.

Thank you for the contribution although I find the bolded part questionable but can do nothing since I've never been a man. It's also imperative that some women  deliberately punish their husbands because he refused to give them something they desired passionately even if the 'something' is a senseless and bogous request and that is too bad. It's only whores that give out sex for something in return.

Im not really 500lbs for Gods sake you crazy man@Sweet T

I think there is a need for better understanding between men and women.  We women are not pieces of meat! You African men often fail to see this.  

Sex is important but is it so important you need to rape your wife the woman you love?
And not getting sex everytime you ask for it is NOT the basis of getting it from outside.  You expose your wife to STD's and heartbreak.  

There are different situations that are not so clear cut.  But please no raping!

In a mans case you call it seduction, in the womans case you say it is rape. And I hear you say its a mans world
The women are actually the men

@Lady T

you keep saying rape rape. What sort of men rape their wife. If the woman says no and he still persist then he needs to see a sex therapist because he's a sex addict. The same wife that says no today will say yes tommorrow. as long as she don't permanently say no, then we are cool. Marriage is no joke. My parents have been married for almost 45 yrs and being the last born i saw the importance of true love in a marriage. true love is patient and lifts you above the skies. It's important for a woman to know their man b/4 they say " I do". If he pester you for sex all the time before marriage, what makes you think he will stop after marriage ??

Sweet T  darling this is not my topic I am just discussing the topic which is Marital rape,  *rolls eyes*
Are you understanding it yet? God help me


Dalby how is holding someone down while them scream stop seduction,

By SweetT
If he pester you for sex all the time before marriage, what makes you think he will stop after marriage ??

That's a good question because we women always make the mistake of assuming that we'll change our men. Some succeed in changing their men but most don't. As a matter of fact, most men change from manageable to worse after marriage.

By dalby,
In a mans case you call it seduction, in the womans case you say it is rape. And I hear you say its a mans world
The women are actually the men

Rape is different from seduction. Some women though, rape their husbands mostly by incessant pestering but it's not as gruesome as those men that use physical force to obtain what they want.

@Lady T

This is a tip. When you get involve with a man, before it gets too far and you are not sure about the kind of man he is. look at his family background and study the way his brothers treat their wives of the way his dad treats his mom. This usually gives you a good indication of how he was taught to treat a woman.

The word " RAPE YOUR WIFE " is highly repugnant and i wish everybody quit using it. If you know anybody going through such, please dial 911 and call the police !

look at his family background and study the way his brothers treat their wives of the way his dad treats his mom. This usually gives you a good indication of how he was taught to treat a woman.

This formular doesn't work sometimes. Some guys learnt how to be dick heads through their peer group. It's like saying that those that get involved in campus secret cults always come from families that are fetish and practice occultism.

@Hotfunmi

Trust me it works most of the time. we used to have a family friend before my father banned them from our house. These guys treat women like rags. They camp women in different rooms and use codes like " coast clear" to jump from one room to the other. These guys are so useless that when a woman first meets them, you would think you've met Jesus himself. but since a lot of them don't pay attention to the other brothers, they fall for the trap. If you love a guy and hang with him for some time, trust me you would be able to read his book like a newspaper.

Sweet T:

The word " RAPE YOUR WIFE " is highly repugnant and i wish everybody quit using it. If you know anybody going through such, please dial 911 and call the police !

In Nigeria, dial 911 calling the police does not work! weak human rights for married Nigerian wives!!! Maybe I was wrong! Because someone say in Nigeria does not allow divorce in the name of domestic violence or adultery! Lot of married Nigerian women are stuck!!!!

@uspry

But i know close family ties works. If my brother in-law did such things to my sister, he will visit the hospital. This why family values are important to a country, Nigeria women take time to teach your sons love and how to respect women. Don't think he's enjoying life by bringing different women home. He's blowing his life away.

Na wa oooo,
im a lady.
but how can you even deny your husband sex. what rubbish is that. i mean youre supposed to know what marriage is supposed to be like before you enter it. any woman that denies her husband sex is an absolute BAD wife unless she is sick or has some better excuse but she has no reason to. if you dont want your man to run away or find many others you better do it oo even if you guys are fighting or youre angry you should just do it and pretend like youre enjoying it. i mean thats why ure a woman, thats why God made women the way they are and Men the selfish people they are, its not gonna change, no matter how much you want to say, argue and fight its always gonna be a Man's world oo,

So pleaase women just close your eyes and do it, always please your husband thats if he deserves it!
LOL

By menz328
thats why God made women the way they are and Men the selfish people they are

I disagree, God did not make men selfish rather the egocentric ones just want to be that way out of shear wickedness. God implored men to 'love their wives' and not 'rape them' in the bible.

@meenz38

I refused to believe that you are a woman!

wait if its not selfishness then wat is it that makes men cheat and how many men can you count that have stayed faithful to their wives all through marriage versus how many woman have stayed faithful, probably 1 in 100 men have stayed faithful and probably 80 in 100 women have been faithful,
how can you not believe im a woman because i think the way i think doesnt make me different from any other woman.
its just that i dont understand why the hell you would refuse ur husband sex it makes no sense to me in the first place. i mean then why are u married, u better go back home and stay there if ure not ready to be pleaseing ur husband! those are the stupid little things that send men out to be chasing little girls up and down and carrying different women, when theyre wives wont give them sex.

So im a man now abi?
LOL

Good night y'all


Good night Lady T, Omo to fine. Omo dara o de jo. By the way i like Ijebus because of chief MKO Abiola.

Marital Rape? A lot of the ladies these days know not what they want! No wonder a lot of marriages don't last beyond 5years. A husband raping his wife? There's no rape in marriage! I find a lot of things difficult to understand. How many of you are married. I am talking to those contributing to this post. Please define what rape is,

Cut off his peewee if he tries it! What a mature and sound way of thinking?

Marital rape is very difficult to ascertain there are many grey areas, why should either partner deny the other sex in the first place?

Your body is not yours it belongs to your husband/wife, so you should oblige them (within the realms of mutually agreed normalcy)

pestering for sex or wanting sex all the time is not synonymous with rape, Like I said earlier, partners should oblige each other so the issue of rape does not come up, with the caveat i stated above.

@ funmi

you may say otherwise, but it seems ALL your threads are focused on the unpleasant/dark side of men in relationships. . .you either have a chip on your shoulder or maybe you had a raw deal with guys. It gives the appearance that you have a very low opinion of Nigerian men in particular. I wonder why

@ LadyT aka Thunder B**** holla!

FKseun:

Marital Rape? A lot of the ladies these days know not what they want! No wonder a lot of marriages don't last beyond 5years. A husband raping his wife? There's no rape in marriage! I find a lot of things difficult to understand. How many of you are married. I am talking to those contributing to this post. Please define what rape is,

Rape is when a man forces his way in without the woman's consent.
Like many have said.when it comes to a stage where the man has to use semiforce,something is wrong is wrong in the relationship.
Sex should be enjoyed by married couples and where love exists and both individuals are fulfilled,both people should be looking forward to it.

A man whose wife always seems to have a headache when the clock strikes 12 ought to ask himself what he's doing wrong.
Women are emotional beings by nature.
If a man is not caring and romantic throughout the day,he shouldn't expect her to suddenly turn into anna nicole smith (of blessed memories )when the light goes out.
It doesn't work that way for most women.

debosky:


@ funmi

you may say otherwise, but it seems ALL your threads are focused on the unpleasant/dark side of men in relationships. . .you either have a chip on your shoulder or maybe you had a raw deal with guys. It gives the appearance that you have a very low opinion of Nigerian men in particular. I wonder why

I've noticed that too.
Thank God I have absolutely no unpleasant stories to tell about Nigerian men in the area of personal relationships (except a suitor who chewed with his mouth wide open)
I guess when one projects a positive attitude you attract positive people.

A good wife should never allow the man she loves to walk out the door,fully loaded

babyosisi:


A good wife should never allow the man she loves to walk out the door,fully loaded

bad girl!

spoilt:


bad girl!

My sister that's the truth.

babyosisi:

Rape is when a man forces his way in without the woman's consent.

What do you guys call the reverse
You look for a good word and call it seduction

babyosisi:

Like many have said. When it comes to a stage where the man has to use semiforce,something is wrong is wrong in the relationship.
Sex should be enjoyed by married couples and where love exists and both individuals are fulfilled,both people should be looking forward to it.

Each party brings his or her part to the table, for both to savour

babyosisi:

A man whose wife always seems to have a headache when the clock strikes 12 ought to ask himself what he's doing wrong.

Why is the woman not supposed to check her self that she might be doing something wrong

babyosisi:

Women are emotional beings by nature.
If a man is not caring and romantic throughout the day,he shouldn't expect her to suddenly turn into anna nicole smith (of blessed memories )when the light goes out.
It doesn't work that way for most women.

How does it work please, women alway like to play the role of the victims in all situations. The once that can do no wrong, that can not even hurt a fly. When you hear their exploits you actually begin to wonder who the weaker sex is

I wonder

Meenz328:

wait if its not selfishness then what is it that makes men cheat and how many men can you count that have stayed faithful to their wives all through marriage versus how many woman have stayed faithful, probably 1 in 100 men have stayed faithful and probably 80 in 100 women have been faithful,
how can you not believe im a woman because i think the way i think doesnt make me different from any other woman.
its just that i don't understand why the hell you would refuse your husband sex it makes no sense to me in the first place. i mean then why are u married, u better go back home and stay there if ure not ready to be pleaseing your husband! those are the stupid little things that send men out to be chasing little girls up and down and carrying different women, when theyre wives wont give them sex.

You do not have any statistical basis to support this claim. Anyway can you give us the statistics for people dating let us compare and draw conclusions

More often than not, the women lay the foundation, while the men complete the building.

hotfunmi:

I disagree, God did not make men selfish rather the egocentric ones just want to be that way out of shear wickedness. God implored men to 'love their wives' and not 'rape them' in the bible.

If it is done in love, thinking thats how she enjoys it then
Frankly you know there are cases like that

@akara

The woman is always one step ahead
hehehehehehe, you got me there

Well, good contribution, , but is it really right to withold sex from ones husband? Ok, consider a situation whereby the wife had pregnancy for 9 months, she complained being unconfortable to spread her legs, preaches to the husband about how uncomfortable she is in terms of sex positionin. After all said and done, the baby is now old enough, the wife is now very strong, the husband had been sex - starved for hellish 7 months or thereabout. Now is the husband' turn to exercise his right over what nature had deprived him and the wify is saying "I don't want!", Ok sha!, I won't force her to spread her legs. I can only pay back by putting on belt on my Denim y sleepin for the rest of the year!

Funmi, LadyT, won't that be fair enough?