Kobojunkie:

Hence the reason why I feel nothing but pity for the wife and the marriage . . .

Ujujoan:

Your mama dey try oh, cooking for another woman's husband while the wife is alive and well! I don't think people should meddle in other people's marriages. You can cook and take to him in the hospital, no wahala, but not take over feeding the man!

Do you know why he was hospitalized? Do you know if he was being treated for gonorrhea which he contacted from an ashewo? If you were the wife, will you visit him or cook for him?

But you mum went and made her look bad by cooking for her husband. I don't know sha, but that doesn't seem right!

jennykadry:
Yes. If the teachers had minded their business, they would be no slap. I said it on this forum once or many times that in 2010, I slapped a teacher who slapped my niece, NIECE OOO not daughter. You don't hurt people close to me and expect to get away with it. I am not against disciplining a child and I have made that known here many times but when you decide to over-use your power of authority because you think the other person is helpless or isn't the right place to confront you, then you must be wicked.

Coogar, I did not marry my husband for any eediot to insult him directly and/or indirectly. The day any sister, uncle, aunty, father, mother, brother insults my husband, I will figuratively kill that person. I protect my own, I don't leave them out to be eaten alive by beasts and I expect my husband to do same and even more.

I repeat, there is only so much a human being can take. ME, I was born strong, tough and ready to send to hell witches and wizards in human form. I don't beg to be noticed and I don't expect an inlaw to do same. I am bringing up my kids same way. My daughters must have that spirit of a "tiger" and (Peaceful) in them. That has brought me so far, that was what attracted their father to me in the first place

coogar: i'm happy the naija men got duped.
any man who ignores his immediate environment and decides to marry a girl from onitsha deserves to be ripped off! unless a man is marrying a spouse he left in nigeria before travelling, there's no pity for any nigerian man in texas going to babyosisi's village in mbaise to find a bride!

2sexy: Thank you... you just want me to those say nice words or say I will do this for my wife, I buy this.. eh no, I wont take nonsense from anyone who speak of my wife any how. You talked about me being sentiment but I see you are being sentimental too in this case just because you are a woman and have chosen to take side along that line.

If that is what you want me to say, I am sorry to disappoint you. I repeat she has to earn it. I dont care what that means to you. Thank you.

babyosisi:
Amadioha ma Jie kwa gi olu
Mbaise babes are the best
We are good loyal wives
And we are more fertile than rabbits too
Before you shout Okija we have popped out 3 hefty boys in a row and ready for the 4 th

Kobojunkie:

Stop trying to push it all off on others. Those are your words. I simply asked you a question --- which you never answered by the way. However, all you have done is innundate us with stories of how any woman you get married to essentially has to "PAY UP" for that 'privilege'. And I am simply giving my honest stance on those word that have been emanating from your own side of this.

2sexy: I hear you na... when I mean earn it, I dont mean slavery, okay?

babyosisi:

Amadioha ma Jie kwa gi olu
Mbaise babes are the best
We are good loyal and industrious wives
And we are more fertile than rabbits too
Before you shout Okija we have popped out 3 hefty boys in a row and ready for the 4 th

coogar:

if you feel so strongly about someone slapping your neice, how much more if you perceive one toothpick-legged chic is mistreating your son. the same son you carried for 9 months and spent the top dollar on? abegi, you would do worse than the OP's MIL

maclatunji:

Nice advert, I am almost tempted to invest in one of your sisters already.

babyosisi:

Just to warn you,out of state suitors have a longer list of things to buy
You have to prove your manhood o because you are getting a rare gem
Is your pocket ready?

Kobojunkie:

When any person who has a good idea what a marriage relationship should be reads the words "EARN IT" or any synonym of such applied to marriage, the alerts go off as the person knows something is wrong.

2sexy: whatever... I will not want what happened to my elder brother to happen to me. I dont know why you just fail to see what I have been trying to just because of the feminine ego in you.

Yes, she is my wife and she deserve the good things as a wife but she try to abuse it just because she is my wife, she get served fair and square.

In all my life since I have been in this world, I always make sure that when I take actions, people dont blame me when they hear it and I guess that is what makes me tolerant.

For instance, my immediate elder brother's wife was trying to cause division between I, my brother and my elder sister. And since my mum just died at that time, we stayed together. My younger sister left because she could no longer tolerate it. By the time I decided to leave, guess what my most eldest sister said.

she knew I am very tolerant and for me to say I want to leave, even though she didnt take that of my younger sister serious, she knew something was wrong and she became very upset with the wife.

You dont know me and you are just saying things based on sentiment. I wont feed that sentiments lady, I wont. period.

Vikin:

You speak as if you are doing your to-be wife a favor by marrying her. :

What if the reverse is the case?

maclatunji:

Sarcasm is diminishing Sisi's comprehension skills. This topic is not difficult at all for women with depth, your MIL will leave without you acting like a lunatic, just hold your fire and position. I tire for these new breed of women with their yanga, please what are you guys begin to the table of marriage? Sex?

Respect for the man is 0, his family you don't want to see. Life doesn't work like this.

plaetton:

Right on point. I am beginning to wonder what marriage means to this generation of women.
This whole thread has been about the woman's MIL. Most of you have forgoten that it swings both ways.

Like I posted earlier, in far majority of the cases, it is the wife's mother, siblings and relatives that come to live or stay with married couples.
Men are usually the ones who have to put up the inconvenience and excesses of MILs and siblings of their wives.
And men endure all this with patiene and wisdom.
Wisdom is the key word here.

The questions remains: Why is it the women that are always insecure,paranoid and quick to complain about the husband's mother and relatives?.

This is what happens all the time. The wife is free to bring her battalion of relatives to her home, but when her MIL or relatives from her husband's side show up, it becomes an unbearable burden for her and threat to her well being and marriage.

It is always a double standard.

babyosisi:

My stand on MIL is clearly stated on this thread ,I agree that everywoman should do everything within her power to be at peace with her MIL
But with all due respect,the family of the woman and that of the man are different in a way when it comes to visiting
The woman's mother( and sisters) come to her house most times to help her and will do things without being asked to help make her daughters life easier
The MIL and her older daughters many times come expecting to be served and be waited on hands and feet by her DIL,they expect and sometimes demand it of their brother's wife
There is a world of difference between the two
Your own relatives will not make those demands of you.
A daughter sees her mother in her home most times as a helping hand,she can be asked to clean to help take care of babies,you don't even need to ask ,your mother will gladly do it and then do some more.
Let any woman try to use the same way and ask her MIL to cook ,clean or bathe a child ,her story will reach her matrimonial village of how the untrained DIL wanted to turn her MIL into a house girl,commanding her around etc
Speak to any DIL about what I just said,if they are truthful they will agree with me.
I love my MIL dearly but my mother visiting is of greater help to me in the home than my MIL visiting
One I have to work harder,the other diminishes my work load
That is just the bare naked truth

babyosisi:

My stand on MIL is clearly stated on this thread ,I agree that everywoman should do everything within her power to be at peace with her MIL
But with all due respect,the family of the woman and that of the man are different in a way when it comes to visiting
The woman's mother( and sisters) come to her house most times to help her and will do things without being asked to help make her daughters life easier
The MIL and her older daughters many times come expecting to be served and be waited on hands and feet by her DIL,they expect and sometimes demand it of their brother's wife
There is a world of difference between the two
Your own relatives will not make those demands of you.
A daughter sees her mother in her home most times as a helping hand,she can be asked to clean to help take care of babies,you don't even need to ask ,your mother will gladly do it and then do some more.
Let any woman try to use the same way and ask her MIL to cook ,clean or bathe a child ,her story will reach her matrimonial village of how the untrained DIL wanted to turn her MIL into a house girl,commanding her around etc
Speak to any DIL about what I just said,if they are truthful they will agree with me.
I love my MIL dearly but my mother visiting is of greater help to me in the home than my MIL visiting
One I have to work harder,the other diminishes my work load
That is just the bare naked truth

maclatunji: ^New definition of marriage for the "liberated" woman: A union in which the husband does everything and anything to please his wife whilst she expects him to be thankful for selecting him to be her boy-toy with which to fulfil all her sexual desires and fantasies.

I don't know, tell me if that's selfish.