This is your gossip queen and as the tile says this is Nairaland's E! Channel bringing you the juiciest gossip and gists on our fellow Nairaland members. It could be recent or something that has happened in the past, anything that gets the tongue wagging .

We sometimes underestimate that bit of our selves (good or bad) we leave behind in our posts and it's my job to fish them out and analyse for our entertainment. From reading between the lines of your posts, e-beefs/fights, who is crushing on who, who's doing the naughty dance with who, the bold & careless, the funnies & uglies, it's all right here on the Nairaland E! Channel.

Our first episode will commence later today so keep it locked on this section. Comments will not be allowed here but you can leave them on the chat thread (see link) https://www.nairaland.com/1129847/entertainment-lounge-chat-gossip-lovers

I'm watching you

Episode 1

It wasn't too long ago when DailyNews (DN) went all he-bitch on pearl-hapi (PH), his estranged lover. It seems that these fellow members, like most of us, took their friendship offline to explore what the future held for them. It was rosy, infact so rosy that DN had confessed to falling in love with PH.

Don't ask me if PH felt the same but what I do know if that girls at that age want to Bleep around experience the world, mingle and have fun! Which is normal, very normal. What I don't get is why she would confide to DN about guys she's crushing on knowing his feelings. To make matters worse she also confided to going to Port Harcourt to meet a mysterous NL character and I think we all know what went down

I no know wetin enter PH brain that fateful day, abi na PMS things or oversized head AKA inflated ego just because some bobos, with Emmy9ite in the lead, dey toast am. Me I no know but wetin me know be say na devil cause am! The dude must have been bored sotey he come find PH. As e-bombs they scatter the thread left right and center see as Emmy come back the Bleep up say im no know say dis gyel dey do like this. The one wey devil inspire that night, Hornipipe and others like ITbomb come dey catch grenade for this babe but the damage was done and PH had no choice but to retreat in shame. Even her friend Maria Gorreti denied her thrice which I think was unfair but as she herself was at risk of the same exposure she smartly disengaged and realigned her ties.

But you guys were there na so I don't need to recount the story for you. What is intriguing is that the mysterious character in Port Harcourt was no other than ITBomb!! This smooth criminal was silent, hidden in the shadows that is 'viewing mode' as many fingers tapped violently against their keypads, until things got messy and he typed a few words in his lovers favour before disappearing back into the shadows. Hmmm! Wonders shall never end.

Anyway I will end it here and not say that the guy's engaged and the unsuspecting fiancee was out of town at the moment. I won't say it cos it's not my business who he bleeps. Where is that girl sef? Hope she's good. Anyway it is well.

Your Gossip Queen

Episode 2

I no know wetin carry me dey look old threads when I come jam this one!

seedord247:
Fellow Nairalands.

I have been dating a girl for quite 10 months and she is pregnant for me now, i love her but i don't trust her and we fight alot, initially when i met her she told me that she's not dating any guy except me. As time goes on i tell her that i don't like sharing something especially woman that if she's dating any guy she should either leave me or leave the other guy and that was around November last year. Thank God for this year things are going fine for me and i have to buy her so many good things most especially taking her out and buying cloth and so many other accessories during this time she give me full attention. On Tuesday i call her and have to lie to her that i went to one Alfa and they said she has slept with a man that have use something on her and if she wants this thing to be cure she should name all the guys that she have slept with for me and i should bring their names or she will loose the pregnancy, before she use to mention on 3 guys but now she mention additional 3 for me making six guys, which i know they will still be more than that.
I'm no more in love with her now also to abort the pregnancy and quit the relationship cus she has lie alot for me , even if i have to accept the pregnancy i will only collect the child and i will not marry her, she start begging and crying that she have change for the better that all those once are the unknown time that she's change for the better now, she even said her senior sister said she dream about her that she should not abort any pregnant that if she do it may lead to death and the pregnancy is getting to 3 month now. since Tuesday she has been begging me on phone until last night that she came to my place and said i'm ready to abort the pregnant since i can forgive and forget her past sins.
Now, what there is that on Monday i will be giving her 10k to go and abort it and also take care of her self but i'm thinking that am i doing the right or not. Please i need your advice before i do this weather to take her or not or abort the pregnancy and so many of my friend said i should not abort it but now i'm freaked out i don't what to do.

Wetin come make be fall yakata na dis one were he dey correct pesin English

seedord247: Bro leave the girl and go back to school to learn english.

C'mon sharap dia!! Ehen, seedord you be papa or what? :/ Gist us abeg

Episode 3

Before he was Sexkillz, killz and the rest did you know he was ocee87 and ~mikael~ Hmm! Trouble maker!!! Na to say no be today you start niyen
What started this was clicking on his profile to see the new display picture
I only wonder who this message is for because I am sure that the lady in the DP must be fed up with a certain someone or group of someone's chasing after her. At least now they should get the picture, literally. She's not available.

People ask me, 'what's the deal between you and Sexkillz?', 'what do you see in him?' this, that. Hehehe, abeg free me! Although I no send when im come my yard dey ask permission for the DP


Guess who this is from?
"I think I have a better idea of what I want in a lifelong partner now. Yes, I like smart and ambitious girls, but now I think that empathy and ability to understand the way I feel about various things may be more important. The smart and ambitious girls who don't have this will be just friends or business partners. Nothing more."
Chei, see as Seun wan die on top woman matter! Is that why Mukina is nothing but a business partner? Eeyaaah, I hope you found 'her' sha.


I just realised the handle ItsModella has been on NL since May 2011! Is it just me or does it feel like she's been here only recently? Cos I only got whiff of her existence like 2 months ago or so. Was she doing a 'John the Baptist', waiting on the One to come who is greater than she? Shollypopz

To be continued folks

Episode 4

Once upon a time this man was a respected member of this our Nairaland community. Emphasis on 'was'. From his profile I now see he was last online on 7 Dec with his last post on 29 Nov. To add disgrace to shame he has been banned by Mukina till 24 Jan.

His posts serenaded our visions touching our hearts, albeit with annoying large fonts at times. His advise on relationships, love and propriety in relationships for both sexes where traditional simple and acknowledged with a nod followed by the click of the back button.

Alas, it was all too good. Too perfect. In fact make I gist the thing wella jare I don dey tire for these symphony! Chei, how could you Orikinla?! How could you You go pregnate small girl wey fit be ur pikin come here dey yarn us nonsense gist about love? You never marry? Mschewww! Wetin carry you come open that thread, eh? As a boss shey? Hehehehehehe! My new prayer na, 'Father God, just as Orikinla plotted against Queenzy and it backfired, so shall it be for all my enemies!' Old man like you come dey ask pikins for Romance if ur ex dey normal or confused? Ok, open thread no problem, butu why you go mention her NL handle, post im pishure, come join half truths? Your brain no tell you say she go reply you? May my enemies be this dumb ooo! Amen!

So the thread went something like, she asked me not to call, I agreed but then she started posting her pics on my Facebook wall. Eh she does this when she notices hot chicks on my updates... You never hear of notifications? If she uploads a pic it will automatically show on her friends walls. Please don't jump the gun I don't think it was for your viewing pleasure....alone You dey complain say she dey stalk you yet u like and comment on the pics. Hehehehehehe!

Na that gbeborun Mynd, wey no dey do anything except to dey chop popcorn for thread; uj_sizzle, wey dey always form like say she hates that albino monkey when we all know she really wants to ram her tongue down his throat; claremont, ur regular nutcase, wey dey for front seat that day. Me I just read, comot I know no say na destiny plan make I see that thread come share with una today

In Queenzy's words

Queenzy: Ppl would rather blv a side of a story than wait for d whole truth. Orikinla osinachi aka michael chima. Yes i knew u at 18. U got me pregnant at 18. Denied d same pregnancy and then later said u will never support abortion. Yet still denied d pregnancy. A day after d abortion u called and asked hw ur unborn child is doing.

Am i right or wrong orikinla? Yrs passed we made up and i cheated on u severally. We fought u called me names and i endured. Now u want to act like i am d one chasing u. Now when people who r on ur frnd list on fb make updates or post pix dnt they appear on ur timeline? D past couple of months, how many of my pix av u liked or commented on? Answer truthfully. Earlier dis week u sent a text and i will post the contents of dat txt here so dat these nairalamders can judge whether i am jealous or whether i have a disorder just like u said. I got nothing to hide.

How many of una catch cold when u see say this man na Igbo man?!

Queenzy: This is d content of d txt msg "gud mornin my dear queen i wont give up on u no matter who u r dating now and even tho i av princesses, one is her name and d oda one is in fact her title. But there may be many women coming to a man but his heart belongs to another woman. Der may be one or more men in ur life now bt God knows dat none of dem can eva love u as i love u because dey cannot giv u wat dey dnt av. U dnt blong to dem no matter how many lies dey tell u to flatter u into aving sleepin wit dem for nothing more than to boost dia ego and libido. But dey cannot bring out d best in u no matter how long they pretend their lies would b exposed by wat dey do and say behind u. D fact is i cannot stop loving u no matter how much i try. So my dear queen would it not be best for us for u to b d mother of nkiruka now than to be d step mother later?"

i abbriated d txt msg for easy typing

now orikinla, how does dis prove my jealousy, disorder and confusion?

Orikinla, you lucky say na Mukina ban you, not Sexkillz

If you really love a person why do this to them? My pipu this thing no dey confuse you or abi na only me dey ask this kain kweshun

It is well.

NAIRALANDERS!!!

For those of you who do not this yet, there is a major issue going on right under our noses!!!

A thread was opened on the 3 of this month by the handle donziko about being scammed online but another member biz4naija

I suggest you read the thread from start to finish https://www.nairaland.com/1120449/scam-alert-chibuzor-eze-scam

Please note this post made by the alleged scammer on Wednesday the 19th https://www.nairaland.com/1120449/scam-alert-chibuzor-eze-scam/8#13458085

What is now the latest is that donziko is missing and suspected dead! This is not good for Seun and Nairaland as investigators will require admin access to trace the culprit. I pray donziko is alive and safe wherever he is and not dead only because he reported a crime.

If the man behind the handle biz4naija is guilty serious action should be taken against him. He should not escape this. He must be used as a lesson to all Nigerian online scammers. This is now a matter of a fellow members life and should not be ignored. Even if donziko turns up alive this culprit should be found and punished!!!

I have to go now because the speed at which that thread moves pages is alarming.

BRB!!

So it seems donziko is alive, thanks to Odunnu for following it up and others too. He is yet to come on NL though due to network issues in his village in Kogi, so will wait to see when he does.

BABE! Really cracked me up with this post!

Fûckîing Nigerians! Bearers of bad news.

Fûckîng Mrrock, a rock shall collide with your left knee cap and render that kneejoint useless if you do not stop your senile aproko ways. What a joke!

Why the fûck did you come to such conclusions of saying someone in this sensitive situation is dead and pinning the muderer on another man in the process? who are you? Your village's FBI!? Are you normal at all? Luckily for you, we're not in the Stone Age, or else you would have been stoned to bits for bearing such fake news.

Why can't you just keep your damn mouth shut!? Sîlly being. I hope you basked in your minutes of fame while it lasted.

Talking of BABE! I hope she is aware her former lover just resigned as mod from the Politics section. He is going to need her 'comfort' at this trying time.

Oh, you didn't know? Yes o, he, OAM4J and Jarus tended their resignation after Seun opend a thread in the politics section to condemn this years Hall of Shame. Times without number this has happened yet Seun will never learn on the right approach when handling sensitive matters. Anyway sha I hope it gets resolved. Or should I care? Its his site do whatever he wants with it.

Episode 7

Love is such a beautiful....at the start. I mean in that moment when you are getting to know each other, being selfless, pouring out your soul, not once do you think there will ever be a time that glorious knight/princess will be the source of so much heartache. It is such with life but eventually we tend to bounce back get into the groove of things again.

You know that moment when you doing something monotonous like laundry, tidying, writing and then its EUREKA! Yup, that's what happened. You see, I was just thinking about what HumbledbyGrace could have meant when reading from her diary and it has now clicked. She wrote about how K2039 stalked her and then later falling for him. Another female member, hmmm lets call her 'BTH' started falling for K too. The guy no dey rest for her wahala on their section but I bet after seeing his pic she change course sharply cos e be like say that face dey dry pussy. Just saying!

Back to business! On the 'Knowing Nairalanders Better' thread did you notice how K mentioned HBG as one of his peeps and didn't mention BTH when it was obvious she was chasing after him crazily on NL and off? That must have hurt bad. Even after she mentioned him in her interview. Eeyaaa. Me thinks K did it deliberately, his way of sending a message which boldly said,'I don't give a damn about you!' Ouch!

Mscheeew, see me getting carried away again. Ehen so to get his attention abi to show off, HBG 'asked' to be interviewed so that her 'endowments' can be on display. Choi! I don die That interview na shege! No dulling! Girl you bold, I like that. I just imagine as K dick tanda after reading it, you know these nerds are turned on by words


So what led to the untimely demise of affection between HBD and K? Was BTH responsible? Or was it another 3rd party? Well, what I know is online relationships are never easy and it only takes a silly argument or misunderstanding to ruin it. Sometimes no matter how strongly you feel for each other it's not always enough. Especially at their age of 22! Well HBG has been consoling herself by turning to God and the religious section here on NL, particularly with 'Brother' sigmundfreud and one mod like that Obinoscopy . Poor K

To be continued.

Episode 8

It just looks like people are busy hating on other people here on NL. Trying to bring down other, seeking attention over an offline misunderstanding and what not. Well, that's not all because good things happen on NL and I'm just loving this recent one!

A thread in the Politics section by sammietos on the Ekiti State Government recklesness. Particularly in the bad roads. Wetin carry go there, you dey ask? Omo,na follow-follow o! During a conversation with Mynd I found out that a government official from Ekiti saw the thread and now the same roads are being fixed. Imagine that!

So Mynd is not just an ass-licker and master derailer! My own shock is that he took time from his countless crushes on NL whom he stalks like firestar, gree-die, idowuogbo, Tgirl and Slimyem. Ashewo Oniranu


Not all love stories are painful o! How a beauty like Skydeep can be with an antelope like Xynerise is beyond me The lovely NL couple (is there a couple of the year paegant on NL?) celebrated their wedding anniversary recently, pesin no fit rest. The antekope just dey prance up and down. I shock o! So Xynerise brain set like dis? O ga o!

In Skydeep's words,
"ok. I will share a little about it. You this lady. lol.
When he called me and gave me a key that I should throw it in the garbage, I Knew something was wrong. So I ran out of the room and behold it was my dream car. A brand new 2013 KIA Sportage. I hugged and kissed him and that night was special".

I think we know how special

Here is a picture of the gift, guys feast your eyes well. When you have a good woman for a wife this is how you treat her! You hear,ode!

Episode 9

What happened to men of this century? What happened to the days when African men were strong, of good character, good moral values etc? At least African Americans have the excuse of being raised by mums with no father figure that's why they act like bitches crying, whining and complaining over every single problem! Nigerian men what happened to you, because I no say your mama no be baby mama! Hehe, I read that Kim K is the queen of all baby mamas. What a trophy!

We get too many cry babies for this NL, pesin no fit rest. From my previous episodes you can easily make out some of them but there are others and its just shameful. Very shameful. Abeg, lets give it up for the Nairaland Cry-Babies! Whoop whoop!

Born2Fuck, 190, Afam4eva, shymmex, Harddon, Crown Prince AKA Last Apostle and the guys of the Diary section. SMH.

The above-mentioned are not to confused with our comedians; Lefulefu, Chimezie198 and kevin II who do not fail to send us flying into various objects in laughter. Where did they go?

Only 2 weeks ago, the sexuality section's Lord, B2F opened a thread complaining to Seun on how the moderator Jaybee is not doing his job by promoting sexual encounters between members.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He suggested mods who would fit the role and ended with "even 190 can be managed" Ouch! I want to know those 26 people that liked his post and it is only a matter of time till we find out!! In my opinion B2F wins cry baby award. By your furious nods I see you agree too.

On another point, what does Seun intend to do about the matter? Have you noticed how 'comedic' he has been over the past weeks. I find it...uplifting? Its been very entertaining sha. First, he stated 'I'm as single as the moon' followed by 'I am as straight as a happy joystick' after letting it out that he watches porn saved in 'certain folders' on his laptop. It seems like our Seun has finally lost his virginity. Praise God! Seun, so you now know what an orgasm (that wasn't self-induced) feels like!!! Chei! *hugs him* Maybe Seun does have what it takes to promote and encourage sex between NLers!

https://www.nairaland.com/1145504/seun-osewa-us-jaybee-not


I wonder when Crown Prince AKA Last Apostle will settle down with one identity sometimes one can spot both viewing the same thread all alone. Is he normal? Ever since Anonymous left him he's been trying to fill up that hole and seeking any sort of attention and who better than to get it from? Yup, you guessed it right! For the sake of attention he has been a hermaphrodite, HIV+, in love with Sexkillz, the list is endless.

Afam bu afam, I like this guy but he sabi cry! Lord have mercy. See as he calm down when dem make him mod. So is that what you have been itching for? Hehehe! All those Igbo bashing threads that used to make it to the front page will cease, to be replaced by Yoruba bashing ones What is funnier is that he sharply opened a diary the day he was made a mod on 1st Jan. It hasn't been updated since.

If I am to start on 190 and others, there aren't enough pages to do justice so I'm going to leave that to your imagination.

We need more men and less cry babies for the future of our daughters abeg! This is a serious matter

Episode 10

Truckpusher, born2fuck, Omi obo, hornipipe, Bushy anus, sweet cunt, BigVagina, na me na me, Mazi_Omenuko, bigass, omotohdarajugbogbolo, okija juju, cocoduck, PriceOfGarri, SEEMESEEMEO, Shaggyfreshfish, babynatoday, pekelepekele etc...

These names make me laugh but I can't help but wonder if they feel any form of embarrassment typing in their usernames when they sign in to NL? Especially the long ones!

Most importantly, do they get laid with NL chicks bearing handles like Truckpusher or Bushy anus? Some handles make sense in a way, you look at the face in the profile and you find yourself 'aahhing' and nodding. Some are the complete opposite, like a handle with 'stud', 'prick' 'hot' or 'sexy'. Just one look at that pic and you know there's no way in hell you're stepping within a mile of that modafuka let alone....Or a handle like 'imakeitrainonyoubitches' and the guy ends up looking as hungry as Flashaldrin with chickens and goats roaming in the background.
And ladies, na by force to pout? You know yourselves. It doesn't suit you and anyone who says it does hates you!

Lets not forget the ones that try to spice up their boring names Jhyde, laykhorn, thermythorpe hehehehe!

Do these guys tell their partners what their NL handle is because I remember a time I came across the thread 'See What My Nairaland Username Has Caused Me!'

LesbianBoy: There was a particular thread i was reading on nairaland which was so funny that i was LOL! My GF was sitting close to me and she asked what i was reading that was so funny to the extent i was LOL! So i showed her the particular comment which made me laugh! After reading, she LOL too. Next thing i dont know what made her scroll up. Before i could say LESBOBOY she has scrolled up and she saw my username ''LESBIANBOY''. She kept calling it repeatedly in disbelief and she gave my this 'funny' look, like ''dude hope is not what am thinking'' look. i tried explaining to her that its just my username on NL and that i dont 'swing' both ways! But she wont listen!

pls help, how do i convince her! Advice needed, pls no foolish comment.............thanks!

I don't think she looked at him the same way for some time after that day

NL sha!

Can you guys believe this?!

The views on this thread is crazy! Nigeria won 2-1 against Ivory Coast

https://www.nairaland.com/1179114/ivory-coast-vs-nigeria-afcon/54#14143465

[img]http://3.bp..com/-EmTtkG08vWo/UQ6Xo9keM5I/AAAAAAAAAcA/CFBzEpz8Mco/s1600/Nig+match+viewlist2.jpg[/img]

A few NLers decided to leave voice notes for Killz on his birthday today.

Killz listen to these messages sent in for you

Badosky

Cindyrella

Mynd

Dyt

R231

Xynerise


Response from Killz. (Ur nuts BTW )

Killz

--

NIGERIA WINS AFCON 2013! YAAAAY!

People dey crase for this match o!
[img]http://2.bp..com/--HhrLzInlec/URgCPY6S8AI/AAAAAAAAAcY/N5qJBCK6yXM/s1600/9ja+match.jpg[/img]

Episode 15

Is 190 a virgin?

He started a thread on his sexcapades and for 3 days it has been 'loading' with no content. That is why I asked that question up there. If he has been with girls from NL, why would he open such a thread? Even if it were a joke wouldn't the girls he's slept with feel uncomfortable that he would go as far as to open such a thread? Things started coming out, then people will blame me. For what exactly, I don't know

It's like 190 got scared and asked for the thread to be trashed but that one no concine me, na the sexcapades I wan know

190 so you don't hate 9ja girls like you claim abi? So you sef know naija pussy sweet sotey e dey scata brain. Thank you for showing us that your posts on NL are lies, only put here to spark angry/funny responses B2f and others who have been endlessly seeking NL pussy una be learners o, this is how to get laid! I look forward to your future posts here on Nairaland

A certain post got me laughing but it's just sad that it's the seemingly nice ones that fall for bad guys, even me sef like bad boys small (One man's meat, another's poison tinz). I didn't understand what Rooneyboy was on about but it seemed like he was fighting on behalf of Candygosh.

Anyway, abeg my people keep your private lives private if you don't want to be the subject of discussion on a public forum!

*exits with satellite and other recording devices*