The man named Akpos.......

Akpos opened his eyes after a surgical operation
and breathed "Thank God it's over". A man on the
other side of his bed said, "don't be so sure, they
left an injection in my belly and had to open it
again".
Another patient added, "same with me but mine
was a pack of cotton wool". Almost immediately,
the doctor who did the operation stormed in and
asked, "Has anyone seen my watch?", Akpos
fainted.

Public Disclaimer

Crazy thread!

Akpors call customer care by 1am. After 30mins of
advert finally akpors comes on line. Customer
care ...hello this kingsley from mtn customer care
how can I help u. Akpors..god punish u. Customer
care...sorry sir dats not polite wats the problem
akpors..na me u de ask? Check ur time wetin de
nack customer care ..sir dis 1:30am. Akpors..so
why u no dey sleep u be
winch? Customer care..no sir am not a. wizard.
Akpors ...den wetin u be others neva sleep finish?
Customer care ..sir pls go straight to the reason
why u called Akpors ..ok. I get #99 for my fone
abeg transfer me #1 naira make I take make
midnight call. Customer care ...hahahahaha our
two now who come be winch

Efemena_xy: Crazy thread!

I dey tell you.....

Akpos: Marry me?
Girl: Do you have a house?
Akpos: No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car?
Akpos: No..
Girl: How much is your salary?
Akpos: No salary.. but.
Girl: No but. You have nothing.
How can I marry you? Just leave me, please!!
Akpos: I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferrari's, 2 Porches, why do I still need to buy BMW? How can I get salary when actually I am the boss?
Girl: wanna get married?
Boy: No Bitchhh!

Yeah ! Fits the character,Akpors.

But seriously,when did this Akpors character find its way into the comic realm ?

Na wah o !

It used tO be Bomboy !

*laughing my head out !

Akpors asked his wife,
Akpors: who is the biological
father to Junior and Daniel?.

Akpors wife: what sort of stupid
question is that?...you are their
father..

Akpors: you better take those two
kids to thier father..

Akpors wife: honey,why do you
say that they are not your kids?..

Akpors: because every night when
they are about to pray before
sleeping they will say:
`OUR FATHER,WHO ART IN
HEAVEN'.

Akpos phone rings…

Nkechi: “Baby do you still luv me
like before?”

Akpos: “Ofcourse Yes, my luv for
you will never change
... and is never ending.”

Nkechi: “Dats my babyyyy,
I want
you to buy me somting.”

Akpos: “Just name it, I am more
than capable, you know
me now, Nky bebe m”.

Nkechi: “Its just one BB porsche sha…”

Akpos: “No problem. Just find
out the price and let me
know”

Nkechi: “Its 450 000 naira.”

Akpos: “Is it manual or authomatic? Is it still in a
good
shape, as in, the engine. Have you
checked the fuel
consumption too?” How many
kilometers has it done?

Nkechi: ”Honey, its not a car ooo… its a phone.”

Akpos: “Phone? Oh! does it come
with a plasma tv,
wardrobe and generator?”

Nkechi: “Please be serious, are
you buying it or not? ”

Akpos in a whisper)”Ewo!”

Nkechi: “Helloooooo! are you still
there?”

Akpos: “Hiiiiiiiii!”

Nkechi : “What is this, I thought
you love me, infact, don’t even bother again. I will
call Alhaji
to get it for me this
evening.”

Akpos: “God purnish ya life , na
so your tin sweet reach ,
not only Allhaji, better still, call Atiku he will be
faster”

Nkechi: “Am going to delete you”

Akpos: “Is your fone hanging?
Cos I have deleted you
since you mentioned porsche. !
Thief, how much is bride price even in ya village
sef!

Akpors took his son to a church. At church, the
pastor made an announcement if you know dat
you're an orphan in this church stand-up'.
A guy who was sitted next to Akpors' son, told him
dat they always give orphans 250 thousand naira
in the church, when the sonof Akpors heared dis he
quickly stood up, so when Akpors saw his son
standing, he shouted at him, i'm your father sit
down'..as Akpors and his son were arguing,an
usher brought 250 thousand naira and landed on
his son's palm, then the pastor repeated the
announcement again do we have any other
orphans in dis church?.
Akpors himself stood up!!

JOB INTERVIEW.
INTERVIEWER: Tell me the opposite of good.
AKPORS: Bad.
INTERVIEWER: Come.
AKPOrS: Go.
INTERVIEWER: Ugly.
AKPORS: Fine.
INTERVIEWER: You are
wrong!
AKPORS: You are right!
INTERVIEWER: Shut up!
AKPORS: Keep talking!
INTERVIEWER: Ok now
stop all that.
AKPORS: Ok now carry on all that.
INTERVIEWER: Get out!
AKPORS:Come in!
INTERVIEWER: Oh my GOD.
AKPORS: Oh my devil.
INTERVIEWER: You are
rejected.
AKPORS: I'm selected.

10 Mad men were locked up
in a
Chicken yard. 9 of them
started
jumping up and
down
while screaming. However,
only Akpors was found seated
quitely at one
corner of the yard. The
Doctor
went towards him
and
whispered," I can see that
It's
only you among these 10
patients who has
regained mental sanity. Akpors replied to the
Doctor," Hey!
Shhhh, keep quiet, am
trying to
lay an egg!"...lolzzz

Dad :Akpors wat happned,y are you singing and
dancing,i havent seen you in this mood in a while
now.
Akpors: Dad you wil not b buying new exercise
books, txtbooks and even new uniform..
Dad: oh dats gøod,so wat happend,did you get
scholarship?
Akpors:AH DAD,NO Oh, I WILL BE REPEATING THE
SAME CLASS NEXT TERM
Dad:OMG, you are such a fool & duns...
Akpors: that's what our teacher said tooo!!!

Akpors goes to church to make a confession to
the priest.

"Look. I have a confession to make.
3 years
ago when the boko haram guys attacked our
street in jos, a young, gorgeous woman came to
my door looking for somewhere to stay hidden.
And I accepted, on the condition that she would
repay me every day with sexual favors."
The priest says, "Don't worry, young fellow. You
have sinned. You were young and lustful, and
God will forgive you."
"Good," Akpors said. "But I have another
question.

Do you think I should tell her the fight is
over?"

Revolutionary work you have here.