Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,143,505 members, 7,781,553 topics. Date: Friday, 29 March 2024 at 04:54 PM

Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) - Literature - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) (4492 Views)

Legend Of An Ikotun Boy By Callmefemi / Legend Of A Hustler - A Series / African Nerd (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (Reply) (Go Down)

Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 3:25pm On Feb 07, 2013
I dusted my wings as I flew high into the sky singing on top of my voice, it was surely going to be a great night to reap dividends as the whole place was filled with happiness. Nigeria had won the match and everybody is celebrating, what's going to stop me from celebrating, I asked my self. NIgeria had won the football march against Mali against everybody's expectation, even in my community, there had been celebration. Our celebration though is not channelled towards the fact that Nigeria won, it is towards the fact that we were going to get free blood that night.

We had all gathered to watch the march as it aired live on a friend's DSTV, imagine, the st*upid LC2 banning Nigeria from showing the match, they wanted to milk the country and take their own share of the National Cake. I just can't imagine Nigeria sharing Oil Money with those crazy South Africans that do nothing than deport Nigerians that goes there. I wonder why they even go there when opportunities lies in the vast natural resources of the country. Even our South-African brothers are showing racism, racism in the world of mosquitoes.. SMH.

The march had kicked off with Nigeria taking the lead, and after barging the next goal, I needed no soothsayer to tell me that I was going to be a yes meal that night. I flew leaving my brothers, confusing self, everybody appears to be my brother since we all hatched in the same incubator. The same incubator that humans call dirty cans, if only they knew how life sustaining those things are then they won't build houses but come drag our homes with us. I changed my pair of wings for a new one, went to the mirror to look at my self, I still had a little stain of my last feeding on my mouth, I quickly rushed to the bathroom, took my brush and tooth paste, brushed my teeth vigourously and rinsed it.

"Where are you off to so early"

Red-Mosquito asked me as he walked into my chamber. I looked up at him quizically, why would he ask such a question.

"Are you a Fulani man that asks questions at random?"

I replied him.

"May Zues send lightning to keep you pen*s erected all night"

He fired back at me. Red-Mosquito and his love for greek mythologies, and imagine him practising to become a medical doctor, one that would save our lives when we inhale those crazy otapiapia that the humans have come to relied on. Their Raid and Morteins no longer affect us as we have developed our own anti-insecticide.

"Then I will make love to all the female quitoes I catch site of, you know, I will become like Abraham, fathering millions"

I replied him. He shook his head and came and stood by my side, looking at his face in the mirror too.

"Do you think I stand a chance if by chance I get the urge to mate tonight?"

He asked me solemnly. I looked him over, wave of pity washing over me.

"Why not? You can even mate with the bees if you are given the opportunity knowing how much your hormones are raging"

I answered. This seems to have given him hope as he smiled. "Bloody Virgin and a crazy introvert" I cussed in my mind. Stammers a lot when he stands in front of the female quitoes but is a chatter box behind his computer.

Red-Mosquito, my brother and best friend. I smiled as I smelled blood from afar, my favourite spot, Mama Mynd44 Ogogoro joint, I was going to get high on alcoholic beverage this night.



Welcome to my world.... I'm a crazy Mosquito
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 3:27pm On Feb 07, 2013
I'm a new writer who got inspired by Red-Mosquito, please your take is needed... Will be updating as the inspiration comes and goes
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 3:47pm On Feb 07, 2013
Living the life of a mosquito is far from being pleasant as everybody wants to kill you, not everybody to be precise. The cows and horses don't have hands to clap over their heads but the swushing of their tails is enough to knock out all the airs from your lungs. Apart from the fact that these animals have tails that are purely crazy, their blood taste like mud but it satisfies when the darling humans are nowhere to be found or they are tuck safely under that nets of theirs that kills on touch. We are not too bothered by it as our scientist are developing means on survive its touch. Humans and their many inventions, they never cease to amaze us. I can still remember vividly when they introduced laboratory developed quitoes into our midst to mate with our females so they can become sterile and we would all die off.

I had been in Red-Mosquito's house on that day when it was all over the internet. We were even Mosquitolanding that day when it was posted by one of the moderators "Bukina". Mosquito had drawn my attention to it as I was busy proboscising (humans facebook too). I screamed in surprise but he told me to keep quite and let's see the reactions of other users. There was an internet outcry that day, many people called that we use nuclear warheads to attack the humans. Why? Even the Americans know better than to attack an Oil producing country, even Nigeria. If we kill the humans, then we will have to do with the mud blood of the animals, competing with the tse-tse flies.

A plan was deviced to put the lab rats in check, we developed our own weapon, a perfume that we all spread on our body, any one that does not belong to us would be found out and sent to the great beyond using Otapiapia. we were one step ahead of the human.
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by whitemosquito(f): 4:27pm On Feb 07, 2013
A true mosquito writer in d makin. May ur proboscis remain ever sharp.
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 4:38pm On Feb 07, 2013
white mosquito: A true mosquito writer in d makin. May ur proboscis remain ever sharp.

Amen
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Hadesparks(f): 4:45pm On Feb 07, 2013
Lol..... We'r nw in da world of da mosquitoes.....
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 4:48pm On Feb 07, 2013
Hadesparks: Lol..... We'r nw in da world of da mosquitoes.....

Thanks for following....

**Prays hard for the Oga to show**
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by EzePromoe: 7:29pm On Feb 07, 2013
Redmosquito, you dey craze o. Which kind mosquiterian republic you dey form for this forum. Yellow mosquito na the one you open today. Sha, still keeping my fingers crossed waiting for Green mosquito undecided

1 Like

Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Redmosquito(m): 7:51pm On Feb 07, 2013

Nice! Nice!! I dey gbadun the tory
Yellow mosquito? This is serious ooo
gringrin

1 Like

Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by semid4lyfe(m): 8:07pm On Feb 07, 2013
@ OP, go over your story and edit. Quite some typos and grammatical errors in it. . . .
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Nobody: 8:13pm On Feb 07, 2013
Na wa o...this is serious a revolution...
RedMosquito see what you have caused...hahaha
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by whitemosquito(f): 8:16pm On Feb 07, 2013
Seconded. But again u hav to remember that he did it in a rush.
semid4lyfe: @ OP, go over your story and edit. Quite some typos and grammatical errors in it. . . .
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by MaziOmenuko: 8:24pm On Feb 07, 2013
Na waoh! Na so so mosquito full everywhere!! Waiting for a pink mosquito!

#...holding my Mobil insecticide...#
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Hadesparks(f): 8:48pm On Feb 07, 2013
Ma papa work 4 baygon,mortein,killtz company.... So no near ma hood o.
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 8:10am On Feb 08, 2013
Thank you all for your comments, I am so liking it.

Redmosquito:
Nice! Nice!! I dey gbadun the tory
Yellow mosquito? This is serious ooo
gringrin

Oga don show, chei... See inspiration. I pray I measure up to your shadow Sir
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by whitemosquito(f): 8:22am On Feb 08, 2013
Yellow i sent u a pm! Be mosquito enough to reply me! Hisses!
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Tovot: 8:29am On Feb 08, 2013
Now this is one of a kind,very funny!
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 8:47am On Feb 08, 2013
white mosquito: Yellow i sent u a pm! Be mosquito enough to reply me! Hisses!

I did, please check your spam mail or inbox. Sorry if you did not receive it
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 8:47am On Feb 08, 2013
Tovot: Now this is one of a kind,very funny!

I'm praying for the Moderators not to ban me for my next update, but I trust Cuddlemii sha, she will never do that grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 9:00am On Feb 08, 2013
They had invaded us that day their hormones raging, hoping to have all our female quitoes, their skin glowing under the sun and the wings they had on, one that we have never seen before. Even with all our plans, our female quitoes started acting strange, shaking their little bottoms in the air and using their hands to rub their chest. It looked more like what the crazy humans do when I pay a visit to harvest their blood in a stripping joint. Don’t get me wrong, I am really a curious insect and to be candid, it was disgusting. But here seeing our women do it to the new invaders who were still meters away got me so turned on that my p*nis started acting crazy giving me a sensation I had only felt when I had my first wet dream. Mosquitoes too have wet dreams, but this time it is not one on one but a Bleep. Powerful wet dreams you will wish never comes to an end.

“Yellow, instead of you to think of a way of battling this insurgents you are here having an attention. Is this how you wish to rule your millions of children?”

Red-Mosquito was by my side. I ignored him and continued watching the rare show that the female quitoes were putting on. I had known it to be of the opposite where the male quito do the dancing and the showing off of muscular arms.

“Guy, you know this was not what we expected, or did you allow that sexually starved Born2fuck into the lab?”

Red-Mosquito looked at me incredulously, like what the hell I was talking about. Everyone knows Born2fuck but then he is a hard working quito that bites lots of female humans and bring their oil filled blood home. How much I hate those bloods but Born2fuck cherishes them so much that he had introduced other male quitoes to it.

“No, have you forgotten that Born2fuck is a businessquito. So forget about what you just thought of right now.”

Red-Mosquito answered me.

As the alien-quitoes came closer, they sighted the show the female quitoes were putting on and dashed for them without thinking. I grabbed my head and watched the unfolding scene before me, wondering how it would feel like going into extinction. These humans have devised lots of means to make sure they kill us off but this time they looked at the verge of succeeding. I shook my head and looked on.

“Why are you guys looking as if your world just came to an end when the trumpet had not sounded”

That was Mazi speaking.

Mazi, the addict. What does he know about what is going on when I know he will definitely get his satisfaction elsewhere even if it means going to the moon. The humans don’t know that we discovered the moon before they did; our flags are just too small for them to see. We, great mosquitoes of Nigeria.

“What do you know Mazi, this is the last straw. I will die with my proboscis buried deep into a human testis. They will feel my wrath; I will make them pay dearly for this.”

That was Sexkillz speaking.

Sexkillz and his way of talking. We have all gotten used to his sarcasm that it no longer annoys us. But imagine the coward that do not go out to reap food but wait for us to bring home food that he feeds from mainly without having to bury that talkative proboscis of his into a human flesh talking about dying while feeding. I looked at his albinoish frame but was surprised to see a hint of bravery in his eyes, or was it foolhardiness. Quitoes could be crazy sometimes I mused.

“You better shut up there, you think you are in your palace where you can wield power the way you want abi? Better keep quite let’s watch this scene before planning our next attack on the humans”

Born2fuck screamed, his rage showing in his eyes, his presence had been unknown till Sexkillz spoke. This dude had always hated Sexkillz, it is a story I will tell after watching the outcome of the sterility of our female quitoes.
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by whitemosquito(f): 10:11am On Feb 08, 2013
Yellow moss and red moss are def one and d same prsn. How else wil he know everyones character on NL! D sexkicks part wil land u in trouble o. These mods cover ranks and defend dia selves o. Yellow write me into ur story na! Gimme a wicked part o!
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Redmosquito(m): 10:48am On Feb 08, 2013
white mosquito: Yellow moss and red moss are def one and d same prsn. How else wil he know everyones character on NL! D sexkicks part wil land u in trouble o. These mods cover ranks and defend dia selves o. Yellow write me into ur story na! Gimme a wicked part o!
Yellow moss aint me! I'm guessing he's an old member like myself! The guy don smoke weed die! I had a terrible night! I couldnt even look at my frontpage story for comments. My body hurts like hell! I am not him! I am one and only Redmoss! Noone else! But he seems like a chip off the old Glock! grin grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by FoxyRebirth(m): 10:51am On Feb 08, 2013
Nice story here.... Influx of Mosquito community.

The writer writes a little bit like Redmoss himself though his thoughts are interpreted in a simple way.

Way to go Sir, keep it up. Hoping to read more from you grin grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Redmosquito(m): 10:55am On Feb 08, 2013
Foxy_Rebirth: Nice story here.... Influx of Mosquito community.

The writer writes a little bit like Redmoss himself though his thoughts are interpreted in a simple way.

Way to go Sir, keep it up. Hoping to read more from you grin grin grin grin
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaaa! U sef know abi?
grin grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by FoxyRebirth(m): 11:00am On Feb 08, 2013
Redmosquito:
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaaa! U sef know abi?
grin grin grin grin

I know na, abi you want make I deny am grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 11:04am On Feb 08, 2013
Foxy_Rebirth: Nice story here.... Influx of Mosquito community.

The writer writes a little bit like Redmoss himself though his thoughts are interpreted in a simple way.

Way to go Sir, keep it up. Hoping to read more from you grin grin grin grin

I duff my cap for you sir.

I keep wondering why people are confusing me with Red-Mosquito, please and please, I'm not him o, just me my self and us.
grin grin grin

By the way, I'm yellow
grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by tchaik(m): 11:07am On Feb 08, 2013
Redmosquito:
Yellow moss aint me! I'm guessing he's an old member like myself! The guy don smoke weed die! I had a terrible night! I couldnt even look at my frontpage story for comments. My body hurts like hell! I am not him! I am one and only Redmoss! Noone else! But he seems like a chip off the old Glock! grin grin grin grin

[size=14pt] NAIRALAND MOSQUITOS[/size]

1) RED MOSQUITO: PIONEER/FOUNDER
2) WHITE MOSQUITO
3) YELLOW MOSQUITO
4) GREEN MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
5) BLACK MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
6) PINK MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)
7) BLUE MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)


@RM, still dey remember Hades/Minion chats.
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 11:08am On Feb 08, 2013
tchaik:

[size=14pt] NAIRALAND MOSQUITOS[/size]

1) RED MOSQUITO: PIONEER/FOUNDER
2) WHITE MOSQUITO
3) YELLOW MOSQUITO
4) GREEN MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
5) BLACK MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
6) PINK MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)
7) BLUE MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)


@RM, still dey remember Hades/Minion chats.

grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by Redmosquito(m): 11:11am On Feb 08, 2013
tchaik:

[size=14pt] NAIRALAND MOSQUITOS[/size]

1) RED MOSQUITO: PIONEER/FOUNDER
2) WHITE MOSQUITO
3) YELLOW MOSQUITO
4) GREEN MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
5) BLACK MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
6) PINK MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)
7) BLUE MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)


@RM, still dey remember Hades/Minion chats.
haa! Minion and Hades! The good ol' days!
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 11:12am On Feb 08, 2013
white mosquito: Yellow moss and red moss are def one and d same prsn. How else wil he know everyones character on NL! D sexkicks part wil land u in trouble o. These mods cover ranks and defend dia selves o. Yellow write me into ur story na! Gimme a wicked part o!

I don't think the Mods will do something like that, it is a write up I chosed to write for the fun of it. By the way, Red-Mosquito just denied me grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by YellowMosquito(m): 11:14am On Feb 08, 2013
Redmosquito:
haa! Minion and Hades! The good ol' days!

And I just keep wondering why you will abandon such nice stuffs. You know that no matter how hard I try to copy you, it will never pay because I can only be the 2nd best instead of the best. But guy, I like as the anointing dey rub off on me grin grin grin grin
Re: Mosquito Palaver (legend Of The Nerd) by FoxyRebirth(m): 11:21am On Feb 08, 2013
tchaik:

[size=14pt] NAIRALAND MOSQUITOS[/size]

1) RED MOSQUITO: PIONEER/FOUNDER
2) WHITE MOSQUITO
3) YELLOW MOSQUITO
4) GREEN MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
5) BLACK MOSQUITO (Still Loading......)
6) PINK MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)
7) BLUE MOSQUITO. (Still Loading......)


@RM, still dey remember Hades/Minion chats.

I remember when I came with my own style that had to do with me and Marijuana (igbo)... Some dickhead just came and spoiled my fun. I have gotten over it sha grin grin grin

(1) (2) (3) (Reply)

Story:yahoo Boy part 1 by astronautog / Lets Write A Story / Commonwealth Short Story Competition

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 62
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.