I was talking to a friend earlier today and she was complaining about how she seems to have little or nothing to discuss with her husband anymore.
They have been married for 11yrs with 4 children.
She complains that apart from asking "how was ur day?", little family issues now n then and talking about the kids,or talking about one thing or the other happening in the country, they basically have nothing else to discuss. So most times, they just sit and watch TV.
She said she had noticed this for quite sometime now and wanted me to advice her on what to do. I advised her to talk to her husband about it as I didn't know what else to say.
Does this really happen in relationships? If yes, what can one do about it.
Anticipating ur sincere responses.

Never. Me and my wife can talk from morning till night.

It does happen in relationships..and at such time they need to go back to the board and find a new way of getting their groove back. The lady should try and lead conversations since she's the one complaining. If they live in lagos then am not surprised, Stress as a result is gradually stealing their groove..but it something they really need to sit down and talk about before it get out of hand

It happens in every marriage, the question is what should they talk about? She just noticed not--a-problem per say but the root of marital calamity ,

she should make the first move and make it work together.

We noticed that too couple of years ago and I made the made a move and had to spark things up , date nights, movies, exchange/rotate friend visits and many more, I always have plans for us and he appreciated I did and acknowledged my effort cos we end up pulling over and make out in the car and ....... you know

Men get tired / bored from too much women irrelevant talks /chats especially when they have games and deals to execute in their head

*I already banned taking bout money and projects at home, leave that discussion during office hours. I just don't wanna hear it! my head is full already, don't wanna add to my headache.

*We talk bout kids everyday but that's just bout 2hrs max.

* Talk bout movies.

* He doesn't like any Naija discussion , he'll start yawning in no time so-not-mutual.

* Gossip bout our neighbours.

* Argue bout basketball & hockey plays.

OP , tell your friend to make the first move or else nothing will change , a boring marriage is no fun esp when it's goes on for too long, it's just BLAH !

Life's how you make it dear. Life's too short oh... spice it up.

Peace.

rafhell: Never. Me and my wife can talk from morning till night.

Good for you.How long have you been married sir?

^^^^Thanks dear. Nice tips. I'll suggest some of them to her. I think I'll leave out the making out in the car idea. She might just freak out as she is not that kinda person.

It is a fall-out of not marrying a friend. There's a huge difference between being friends with your spouse and just being man and wife.
To address the issue, OP should advice her friend to try and bring back the activities the couple indulged in during courtship days.

jeffizy: It is a fall-out of not marrying a friend. There's a huge difference between being friends with your spouse and just being man and wife.
To address the issue, OP should advice her friend to try and bring back the activities the couple indulged in during courtship days.

See, that's d problem. They didn't court b/4 marriage. They saw each other, fell in-love and got married. Since they're born-again christians, they don't believe in getting to know each other b/4 marriage since it might lead to d temptation of "fornication". Well 2 cut d long story short, she stayed @ her mothers' even after the trad wedding. Her hubby got 2 be with her on their church wedding night as is their rules as born again christians.
But she claims 2 have been in-love with the man den n they had so much 2 talk about then n would even stay up late into the night jst talking.
So obviously, things have changed after 11yrs of marriage.

Whether they were friends before getting married or not, some level of boredom will set in after so many years of marriage. All one needs do is look for ways to spice things up.

As much as I believe in friendship before (and in) marriage, I wouldn't want to attribute the "not having much to talk about" to the fact that they weren't friends before getting married. Almost (if not all) every marriage will go through this phase at some point.