Dat is eh, its not a guday for me atall, my 9yr old son told his school friend dat I smacked him. School phoned me now I came to pick him up the said I can't becos police need to talk wit me. Been waiting for 1.5hrs. D head teacher is sitting on the floor playing wit my 2yr daughter. They won't let me see my son. They are all smiling and acting nice but I know say wahala dey come. Wen dey release me I go update una o.

Update: since 3.10 na now I dey go house. I dey hospital dem check all e body document every spot even chicken pox own.

I beg make I go eat first, I know say I wan loose weight but no be by starvation.

Ok, belly is full now let me continue.

It all started about 12.30 today, my son's school called me to say he had told a friend dat that I hit him. I shud I ve said "No comment" but I said yes he was being naughty. She said ok, dat she wud have to refer d matter to children services. Got to d sch about 3.10 to pick him up n d safeguarding children's personnel called me aside. She said I had to wait for the police, I waited till 4.30 wen they came they went straight to see him in his class stayed wit him for about 20mins then came to me. 4 women, 2 police and 2 social workers all sat in front of me and introduced themselves. Said they here because of a report that I hit my son so I said No, I smacked his Bum because he was fighting his brothers. They said he had bruising on his arms n how did dat get there, told them probably wen I pulled him away from the fight. They said he wud need to see a paediatrician fo full assessment and they also need to consider the safety of my other kids. Dat one burst my head, I throway accent n dignity I start to craze.

The cofrontation: then the short fat social worker start to talk rubbish, na so she get 9yr old grand child n she no dey smack am, I warn am say make she no compare my pikin wit her own, becos I smack am now una call police but if e reach 18 n e do small thing una go throway for jail without asking me if I want or not. If I dnt straighten him the prison system will, so I will do it my seLf. Police con calm me down by now I was screaming n crying.

they said I have to come wit to them to the doc be there becos they wud need to ask me his medical history.

So we went saw the doc, he asked me wat happened and looked at my son. He said he has no concern about his safety all the scars he saw were old injuries . He also said that wen black pple get injuries the scare tend to be heal and gets very dark n pple cud confuse them with black n blue marks. The doc is jewish explained to the him dat am strict wit my boys becos I want them to succeed. Told him my boys get award in school for 100% attendance, I am not a bad mum. He smiled and said he understood. That I shud BE COMMENDED not punished that I have done nothing wrong. Took us back to the ward, and went to speak wit the 4 witches police n social workers. Came back a few mins later n said all is fine we can go home. The short devil social worker begin respect her self she she will come to my house wen they get the written report so she can help me source available resource that may be of help to me.

I told her to tell school dat my son is not being abused.
Na so I spend today o, beans wey I wash to take make moi-moi still dey there I no get the strength .

this must be those accursed social services people
just be patient and let them know its a misunderstanding

i hope ur child does the right thing though they will keeep an eye on u for a while

Beg God to free you this time and sin no more cos you sound like a good poster.

They must've interviewed the boy with child psychologist for body language and detailed info bout how you treat him at home. Family services are no nonsense people.( I work with them everyday)

A word is enough for the wise, my fellow Nigerian moms please lets eradicate any form of pain infliction on our your kids! If anybody does that to y'all , you'll scream abuse... kids are classified into a vulnerable sector, stop cheating them and listen to their WORDS!

No ruler hitting , its a no no, Mac sogbo?

Hitting a grade 4 kid , wadahell!!

Me I won't stop talking its not discipline it's child abuse!

Please update us bebe it is well. The drilling might take a while though

Lmao. Am sorry for laughing but this post is hilarious. Take that boy go naija, shi shi am well.lmao. Pele, dem go soon release you. Na smack na, even oyinbo dey smack.

It is well.I know jidegirl go frown but as baby said na smack na Smacking in the Uk is not illegal as far as i know.Abi poster did you go Jet Li on your son?Were there bruises?If there were bruises me sef i go vex for you cos THAT is child abuse.Besides at 9 smacking(as i see it not those kind flogging naija style)may not even really hurt him esp a boy.

God be with you o.

Op,I'm sorry but your title is hilarious i had to laugh.

Where there's a law...
It'll be okay..i hope.

Dami yes oh , I will frown I don't condone cheating.

I hope everything goes well ( nothing goes well with CFS you need special prayers for that) I'm serious, they'd start monitoring her moves and check on the boy in school constantly even after they release him.

It is well poster.

Baby how you dey ? Long time love.

jidegirl12: Dami yes oh , I will frown I don't condone cheating.

I hope everything goes well ( nothing goes well with CFS you need special prayers for that) I'm serious, they'd start monitoring her moves and check on the boy in school constantly even after they release him.

It is well poster.

Baby how you dey ? Long time love.

My darling, I de o. Been busy with some upcoming projects. I am trying to stay off for a bit to focus completely on it. As soon as I am done, I will be on a rampage again. . So you may not see me as often as possible.

Np. Good luck in your endeavours .

bebe2: Dat is eh, its not a guday for me atall, my 9yr old son told his school friend dat I smacked him. School phoned me now I came to pick him up the said I can't becos police need to talk wit me. Been waiting for 1.5hrs. D head teacher is sitting on the floor playing wit my 2yr daughter. They won't let me see my son. They are all smiling and acting nice but I know say wahala dey come. Wen dey release me I go update una o.

Update: since 3.10 na now I dey go house. I dey hospital dem check all e body document every spot even chicken pox own.

I beg make I go eat first, I know say I wan loose weight but no be by starvation.

Wow. That's stressful! Just make sure going forward never to smack the child on the face, never use any object ( belts, sticks, rulers etc) only your hands and don't be too forceful (leaving bruises/scars). That way they can't hold anything against you. This is actually a good example for all those that wrongly believe you are not allowed to ever smack your child in those countries. If that was the case they wouldn't have released you. As long as it is done properly for correction and not for abuse, it is not against the law.

Sorry about your ordeal.

Hahahahaha....am so sorry for laffing ooo..it sounds funny †̥☺ me.
Your ordeal reminds me of my sis who smacked her child and 4gt she ws in states...it took jst d grace of God for her †̥☺ av her child bk... Ws nt funny den Ooº°˚ ˚°ºo.. My mum almost had a hrt attack...
Nawah Ooº°˚ ˚°ºo...
It Ȋ̝̊̅§ well. Epele...

From ur post,u r really a good mummy.pls do keep it up!don't mind those pple,anyway they r doing their work.it only takes strong willpower not to spank kids at times cause they can be really naughty.but ur ordeal gat me laughin and I'm happy it didn't result to another thing

Sorry for your ordeal, and thank God it all ended well, im happy for you.
Kids can truly be naughty, sometimes, one has to be really patient with them.
Meanwhile, whenever any of your kids annoys you, its better to punish them and let them be.
May God help us all.

greatgod2012: Sorry for your ordeal, and thank God it all ended well, im happy for you.
Kids can truly be naughty, sometimes, one has to be really patient with them.
Meanwhile, whenever any of your kids annoys you, its better to punish them and let them be.
May God help us all.

Am still numb from it, I only held him by his upper arms n took him to the naughty corner, wen he wasn't responding to dat I used my palm to smack his bottom. Within minutes it was all over. He came down stairs n apologised. We were all back to normal. Didn't even tell his dad until d police got involved. D thing tire me o jare

Hilarious ordeal. Trust my Nigerian teachers, they would have added to the bruises. Pele.

OP, sorry for that! Take it easy next time ...

The law I find sometimes too much oh...

They even take permission to touch your kid.

Even a family member take permission to carry your infant or even touch them, they stare from a distance...I remember when I visited an in-law who just had a baby, see the way. I grab the cutie begin throw him up, the mother couldn't say anything to me ...thankGod dem no call police sef..

Vikin: OP, sorry for that! Take it easy next time ...

The law I find sometimes too much oh...

They even take permission to touch your kid.

Even a family member take permission to carry your infant or even touch them, they stare from a distance...I remember when I visited an in-law who just had a baby, see the way. I grab the cutie begin throw him up, the mother couldn't say anything to me ...thankGod dem no call police sef..

abi o, the thing dey shake person. me wey be talkative com see as i dey feel.
am trying to forget but its not easy.

my hubby keeps teasing me," come kiss now o, if no be GOD u for dey jete now" i no even get the energy to fight am.

i will give it a few days see how i feel.

@OP
Thank God for your life, those social workers are from another planet . The thing wey dey pain me be say when they see the real child abusers dem go do nothing until it result to a tragic end like baby P.
Make you just dey do the boys jejely, may God help us.

You really have time oh. While I do understand the interest of the child is paramount. I also know that I will die first before I let any harm come to my children.

I do believe in reasonable discipline including smacking and strictly speaking it is not against the law to smack provided you are not leaving marks or doing it in a way that can harm the child. My position, I will ask if I have done anything that is against the law ask if I am being arrested and collect my child case closed.

the witch said she is coming to see me 2mrw.

about 4pm wen we are all at home.
am just going to nod along.

i no get power to shout.

bebe2: the witch said she is coming to see me 2mrw.

about 4pm wen we are all at home.
am just going to nod along.

i no get power to shout.

Thats the attitude dear. Dont do gragra with her and watch your body language be relaxed and it will go well.
At some point your son will need to understand why mummy disciplines him the way she does and it is because she loves him.
I always tell my sister the same thing easy with this child because she is a chatter box and you dont want social service to pay you a visit. Her reply is ''nor be if they see mark for her body''. For the older ones it may help to explain why mummy disciplined them for being naughty. In all you do, dont leave mark on a child's body and if you can help it dont beat them at all.

touchmeder:


Thats the attitude dear. Dont do gragra with her and watch your body language be relaxed and it will go well.
At some point your son will need to understand why mummy disciplines him the way she does and it is because she loves him.
I always tell my sister the same thing easy with this child because she is a chatter box and you dont want social service to pay you a visit. Her reply is ''nor be if they see mark for her body''. For the older ones it may help to explain why mummy disciplined them for being naughty. In all you do, dont leave mark on a child's body and if you can help it dont beat them at all.

Tanks my dear,
She came yesterday and was acting very nice telling how she was born in this area, there used to be a church here, there used to be a stream there. I jeje sit down dey listen. Asked all sorts of questions, do I have emotional support ? Wud I know where to go if I was feeling happy? Am I claiming all my entitlements? She left and said she is going to write her assessment and see wat help I cud get. I only asked for one support transport for some activities becos am tired of dis taxi driver work. If the can take the boys to scout on wednesday evenings dat will be gud. At least I o rest small.

I understand ur plight but here is it, I read ur story and that's really a bad situation so if u won't mind, this is my advice. I want to believe that u are already a good mom that takes no nonsense from ur kids but stop with the whooping and smacking. Adopt punishment instead, u know ur kid so u would know the kind of punishment that is appropriate.

Since ur concern on the other thread that caught my attention was how to manage raising ur kids to prevent them from going astray in the face of Child Protection checkmates, I have some general suggestions

- If u warned ur kid that if u do this I will punish u for it, if he ended up doing it u must punish him, never forgive him. Moms love to forgive their kids a lot because they love them but well.. I see it as misplaced love in such situation.

-Communicate, interact and discuss with ur kid constantly and all the time.. So u can keep track of what he does and happens generally at school.. Their teachers tell them a lot of craps, that way u can deprogram all craps immediately from their brain before it sticks there.
-Always ask them about what happened in school, what their teacher taught them if u do not constantly teach ur children a thing or two and picture in their brain that u are their ultimate teacher, that will affect how effectively they do or do not listen to u. (This is not about just telling them, u must literally constantly teach them like a teacher on different topics that u will ike to teach them about)
-Ensure that ur kids respect u and ur instructions, u don't need to beat ur kids up to achieve that
- If u are a parent that shouts, yell and sweat before u get ur kid to carry out ur instructions, that's a red flag
-Don't express a frightening shock anytime ur kid tells u something unpleasant
e.g (mom..Titi and I were playing bla bla bla.... and so she now kissed me on my cheek) Don't react like heeey heeey what did u say? what did u say? heen if I catch u bla bla come here *slap* *slap*... That would push the kid into keeping things they do secret from u and that is where the problem starts.. Instead, be sure to listen to the whole story, ask question and educate the kid in a subtle way. That way u can always get updates and feedback from them cos u didnt freak them out
-Ultimately, create a bond, strong friendship between u and ur kid, kids can be very loyal if u show them love and portray urself as their superman/woman, they usually tend to not want to disappoint u and when they get to high school, that connection will be maintained and it will keep them in check.
I don't know if u are already doing some or all of this its just a general attempt to contribute something. I dont intend to tell u waht to do, I am just passionate about protecting our kids from the evil whirlwind that is blowing them away these days.
May God help u!

Ladies and gents, i had u all abt ur kids we that are hear in europe we ar seeing a lot the system here abt bringing up children is completly defrent frm what is uptaneble in africa, however we shouldnt relant cos if it gos bad u will take the blame full time

I will say instead of hiting them to mark, hit thir botom with ur palm or draw thir ear had in a way they will fill the pain, that how I do my kids and by God grace they obedient to me and thir mum, but make sure its last result, it shall be well with us amen.

and to think i didnt even beat him (only small)

and i go thru all dat wahala

e pain me sha

At age 19 and in my final year in Ogun State University, my grandma.....God bless her soul.....still dey beat me!!!

jidegirl12: Beg God to free you this time and sin no more cos you sound like a good poster.

They must've interviewed the boy with child psychologist for body language and detailed info bout how you treat him at home. Family services are no nonsense people.( I work with them everyday)

A word is enough for the wise, my fellow Nigerian moms please lets eradicate any form of pain infliction on our your kids! If anybody does that to y'all , you'll scream abuse... kids are classified into a vulnerable sector, stop cheating them and listen to their WORDS!

No ruler hitting , its a no no, Mac sogbo?

Hitting a grade 4 kid , wadahell!!

Me I won't stop talking its not discipline it's child abuse!

Keep fooling yourself. And what do we get as a result for over pampering these kids? Murderers, psychopaths etc. Until we learn to apply a bit of caning/smacking/physical touch, USA, UK and other western countries ll not cease to produce Serial Murderers like James Holmes of "the Dark Night" @ Colorado etc.

REFERENCE...Proverbs 13:24; 23:13-14.

Buahahaha!!! Op I'm so sorry but the way you wrote the story makes it so funny. It reminds me of the time my summer camp counselor called CPS on my mom because I kept saying I was hungry. I was hungry but I just didn't feel like warming up food in the microwave after school. You should have seen the look on my mom's face when that white lady was looking through our fridge. Mmm America...

jidegirl12: Beg God to free you this time and sin no more cos you sound like a good poster.

They must've interviewed the boy with child psychologist for body language and detailed info bout how you treat him at home. Family services are no nonsense people.( I work with them everyday)

A word is enough for the wise, my fellow Nigerian moms please lets eradicate any form of pain infliction on our your kids! If anybody does that to y'all , you'll scream abuse... kids are classified into a vulnerable sector, stop cheating them and listen to their WORDS!

No ruler hitting , its a no no, Mac sogbo?

Hitting a grade 4 kid , wadahell!!

Me I won't stop talking its not discipline it's child abuse!

and yet when they grow and start ripping people's heads off, you act surprised.

chaircover: lets agree something here. Not all kids need egba. I've seen kids who need caning on a regular basis (although come to think of it, if you need to cane your child all the time, then maybe the caning isnt working and you need another method) and Ive seen mellow kids who dont need cane.

I am not a fan of physical discipline and that is because I have been lucky to have mellow kids. I say lucky because I am not particularly better than parents who have difficult kids. It is the Grace of God.

By all means parents know their kids better than anyone else and they should know the best way to discipline their kids. My concern is that not all kids need a slap/smack/beating and parents should not just do it because everyone else is doing it, or because they are made to feel like bad parents if they dont smack their kids.

A lot of things mould a child . . .environment, genetics, the parents moral standing, the parents background, the kids homelife, the kids peers, the school the kid attends, the type of people the kid comes in contact with, even the kids health issues can affect behavior. Smacking may or may not be an antidote for all these things listed. Basically know your child and find the most effective method of discipline.

totally agree,

i have 3boys together so the testosterone runs in high levels,

i have seen kids who wud come to our house and sit nicely, i wud even have to beg them to go and play upstair.

but if na my own, they will go to the daddy of the house and ask for car keys

i dnt blame them much, my hubby is calm but me? fire fire so is my mum and dad