hello guys, what do you think about this. Am a 27yr old, dating a guy who's the same age. We've been dating for almost a year now. well turns out i brought up 'the talk' only for my man to talk say he has never thought of marriage so soon. say whether i fit wait 5 years. Can you beat that? Say him wan boost him carreer first before marriage. both of us dey work! i wan call am quits.

oops 5 years and you're already 27 meeeeeen its far now,,and he is 27?i believe he's still young sha,and he knows he is still young that is y hes talking like this,if his job pay is ok,i see no reason y he shouldnt get married now,and maybe suspend kids till he boosts his career,well its your decision but 5 years is too long my dear,i suggest u make yourself available to other men,because its obvious you're invisible,im not saying u should go and mess around wt other men,don't get me wrong all im saying is give them a chance,afterall a girl is still single until a guy walks her up to d altar

Wait sef wetin happen to the poster gender.

Wait sef wetin happen to the poster gender.

e no go pass woman,u know read where she say her bobo said she should wait for 5 years

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-127350.0.html

I'd say drop him.

Boost his career?

More like he wants to have his cake, and eat it.

i dont see

anything wrong

with him wanting to make more

money

but as someone rightly said,talk it through with him,

as for someone else telling you to make you self available to other men



bad advice!!! you will be labelled a cheat, best you end this before you decide to move on

Siena:

I'd say drop him.

Boost his career?

More like he wants to have his cake, and eat it.

What?

Isn't that the normal order of things - you get a cake and then eat it.

27 is still way too young i beg

Duh that should be a writing on the wall saying he is not serious, cuz after you don wait for 5 years, him mama go come bring one village girl make her son come marry and dem go come dey call you old mama.

and you should be aware that the longer you wait to get married and have kids, the harder it gets to have kidz cuz your egg depreciates when we age, so i will advice you to dump the sorry excuse for a guy and find someone else. cuz after 6 months- 1 year of dating, a guy should have made up his mind if he wants you to be his wife or not, hell 6 months is too long, the first time they see you is when they make up their minds.

ima1:

Duh that should be a writing on the wall saying he is not serious, because after you don wait for 5 years, him mama go come bring one village girl make her son come marry and them go come dey call you old mama.

and you should be aware that the longer you wait to get married and have kids, the harder it gets to have kidz because your egg depreciates when we age, so i will advice you to dump the sorry excuse for a guy and find someone else. because after 6 months- 1 year of dating, a guy should have made up his mind if he wants you to be his wife or not, hell 6 months is too long, the first time they see you is when they make up their minds.

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6 months too long to know if u want to be with someone for life? r u serious?

for some reason u women think marriage is where everything ends. una go tell me if na marriage go put food for table and put cloth for una body.

@thread starter, it is up to u if u want to wait.

ROTFLMFAO!!!

gurl, waka oh,

the dude aint serious/ready, he still sees himself as a small love/he aint sure of his love 4 u/he still wans to sow his oats more!!/,

if he said a yr or two, then i wud hv adviced u to hang on a bit, but 5yrs!!!, naaaaaaaaaaaaah,
cut ur losses n run!!, n dont come up with, I LUV HIM SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!,
love is adecison, its only on rare cases that its beyound ur control,

at 27 u r still nubile, _{aww how i just luv the word}, n u will definitely get someone else, better still u are working,
we guys like them working these days!!

It is been sometime I met right thinking young adults as your bobo.
Before the girls in the house crucify the boy, what is wrong in having a sound foundation before marriage.
It is the guy's choice either to marry you now and get dropped later for lack of fund or marry you in five years and get dropped now.
Guys, what do you think?

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE OOOOO
The guy wan chop Puyanyi for 5 years free of charge ,
When its 5yrs, he would start referring you to as a big, fat, old, wrinkled, unsexy girl (sorry, Woman )
He will definitely find anoda young girl he will marry, u beta marry now before the market wey u dey sell go finish, cos na evening u dey

The Sly:

27 is still way too young i beg

wey too young ke?Are u saying it on the guy's side or the girl side?Cause things are changing now,people marry early this days oooo!27 is not too young bro!

Why's everyone takin' sides with the lady?

She's 27 and desperate to get married, he's 27 and desperate to make ends meet. What's wrong with a man wanting to become financially stable before settling down? Marriage? After just 1 year of courtship? Gimme a break!!

I commend the guy. He's a progressive thinking individual. If he was dumb enough to 'accept' her 'marriage proposal, she'll probably run back to nairaland in about two years and create a thread like:

HE DOESN'T PAY SCHOOL FEES. .

The poster aka miss desperado should look for someone less gullible and corner him into marriage. The 'victim' should keep on hustling.

What's all the fuss about marriage anyway? Bunch of lazy Nigerian ladies; rather than struggle to make ends meet, they
seek for men to 'take care' of them. The society calls it being 'responsible'. I call it glorified prostitution.

run.
the guy is not ready to marry you he just want your body

There's no victim here. He has made his intentions clear,
This just means two of you are not maritally compatible. No beef. Just move on.

There is no harm in waiting if you love each other.Dont mind nairalanders.

@ poster

i wan call am quits.

please do.

When guys are ready to marry they dont wait five years more.

and if you have been giving him mene mene, when he is tired, he will leave you for a "21 year old" when he is ready

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@ernal, they are two different people with similar problems

hey

give the guy a break and let him know 5 years is too long

you guys might be together if thats your destiny

when he says 5 year, i can assure you in 3 years time he would be ready for marriage and if u persevere till then, it will be you.

hope u love him( 10 years wont be long)

@poster,
the guy is just being diplomatic, i mean both of u re workin, he didn't want to hurt u or didn't know ow to tell u you re not his kind of girl. its an old logic to let things take a natural course, even if you re much more younger than 27 waitin for another 5yrs is not candy, ofcourse he know you can't wait that long. I'm a guy, if you don't want to hurt a girl all u do is tell her you re not ready for marriage & of course career is a good excuse. if a guy wants u to be his wife, he will go any lenght even to the extent of changin his plans.

my candid advise is talk to im and move on, if u do that and if he wants you he come after u.

Tonyblu:

@Rockchic
Basically the first response your issue will draw is "forget the dude and move on", but there's also the aspect of he/she wearing the shoe knowing where it pinches most.
How long hav u dated this guy?
How financially buoyant is he? If you are also employed, wont it be a plus to the relationship/future family?
What are his actual reasons for the "Vision 2013" _(2008+5)?
How strong is your relationship with him?
What kind of personality is your guy?
What is his background and upbringing like?
What is the intensity of his love for you _{(on a scale of 1 to 10)}?
How strong are both of you spiritually?
Have you tried having a dialogue with him to find out his reason(s) for the 5-yr stretch?
Is there any possibility for a "Vision 2010 or 2011"?
Has he considered the medical issues?
Or is HE looking for an easy exit from d relationship?

So before you take any decision, be it leave or stay, I guess you shld explore all available options thoroughly.
Dialogue, remains an import tool to use.

Best of Success and Godspeed!

word!!!

It all depends. She needs to be sure she knows the guy and that the guy is not easily susceptible like me. If he is very resolute when it comes to marriage like me, then she can stay after giving her his word. Simple!!!

Baby, What do you want. Identify it and go for it. Want to wait for the next 5yrs, Go for it(stick to him)

Want to be married before then, Go for it(a broken relationship now is better than betrayal)

Whoever does not identify with what you want isnt the right man for you. 5 yrs isnt a joke, many waters would have passed under the bridge. Decisions would have been made. Many would have fallen in and out of love.

Hi,

i think u should think deeply about what you want and if you can actually trust him not to dissapoint you.

All da best!

@Poster,

Run 4 ur dear life

If u do wait , then u can get ur heart ready 4 heartbreak

Time waits 4 no one

i see no fault in waiting for your loved one/
there is no hurry in getting married, so long
you have concluded that he is the right choice.

my advice for you is to stick to your man, five
years is around the corner.

spicy v:

Hi,

i think u should think deeply about what you want and if you can actually trust him not to dissapoint you.

All da best!

Capital NO,
after building his career, he will then realise that u are way too old 4 him.
U should put in mind that girls age faster than guys. A guy of 50 still rocks
but a girl of 50 cant so girl, hurry out b4 the sun sets on u