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Please Help Me by sstartony: 10:49am On Jun 30, 2013
Pls do not mind my grammar, i'm working on it but constuctive critisisms are welcome, you can even rate me.
I got married Nov/2007, i have three kids (2 girls, 1boy). My husband beats me anytime that pleases him, if i should count the number of times i know it's over 15 times now.
He slapped me for smacking our daughter, when the food is late even when i was pregnant all because i came home 2 hrs late from antenatal, he goes to office with the keys to the gate, he goes to market himself, he stalks the house with food, he doesn't let me further my education, he never gives me cash,he doesn't let me get office job, those that i got he wrote them to sack me, i'm sure he will soon ask you people to block me out here.
He made me sleep outside nakedly on friday because my phone rang@11:50pm, and it was just an alarm to wake me up for prayer. The phone was already off but the alarm which i've set to ring still did so my husband took the phone to see who called but met the phone off. He thought that i delibrately switched of the phone, grabed my hair and kept banging my head on the wall, i managed to escape to the kitchen and took a knife to threating him, he just pushed me out of the house and lock the door.
I've been doing alot of thinking since that friday, all that comes to my mind is to go to police station to make him sign undertaken that he will not touch me again and that he will not touch my property because i've decided to get a shop, buy my own machine since i can sow and make cake, though he bought a machine for me but i'm not allow to sow any cloth aside ours on it.
I don't know if i'm making a right decision. I'm really scared because his family(10 in number) are psyco there is a lawyer among them and they always have each others back either right or wrong.
Nevertheless my family has little knowledge of all this. If my dad should get a clue, he will just end the marriage straight away, he is a man of action.
Pls help me good nigerian, i want to stay married but i want my freedom.
Re: Please Help Me by Afam4eva(m): 11:02am On Jun 30, 2013
Which kain husband be that? Was he behaving like this before you married him but continued hoping that things will change when you get married?

There's nothing like freedom in marraige. When you agree to marry, you have agreed to do things with your husband. If you want freedom then divorce him instead of living in the illusion that you're married.
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 11:04am On Jun 30, 2013

1 Like

Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 11:20am On Jun 30, 2013
sstartony:
Pls help me good nigerian, i want to stay married but i want my freedom.

Sorry, but no one here can help you with that.

In the meantime, I will be praying for you and your 3 children that you don't experience a life threatening situation where you all need to escape from your house but you can't because your 'husband' has caged you all in.
Re: Please Help Me by biolabee(m): 11:36am On Jun 30, 2013
I support your father's stance 1000%

If and when you leave this world, that man will throw away your kids and marry another woman

Ish


sstartony: Pls do not mind my grammar, i'm working on it but constuctive critisisms are welcome, you can even rate me.
I got married Nov/2007, i have three kids (2 girls, 1boy). My husband beats me anytime that pleases him, if i should count the number of times i know it's over 15 times now.
He slapped me for smacking our daughter, when the food is late even when i was pregnant all because i came home 2 hrs late from antenatal, he goes to office with the keys to the gate, he goes to market himself, he stalks the house with food, he doesn't let me further my education, he never gives me cash,he doesn't let me get office job, those that i got he wrote them to sack me, i'm sure he will soon ask you people to block me out here.
He made me sleep outside nakedly on friday because my phone rang@11:50pm, and it was just an alarm to wake me up for prayer. The phone was already off but the alarm which i've set to ring still did so my husband took the phone to see who called but met the phone off. He thought that i delibrately switched of the phone, grabed my hair and kept banging my head on the wall, i managed to escape to the kitchen and took a knife to threating him, he just pushed me out of the house and lock the door.
I've been doing alot of thinking since that friday, all that comes to my mind is to go to police station to make him sign undertaken that he will not touch me again and that he will not touch my property because i've decided to get a shop, buy my own machine since i can sow and make cake, though he bought a machine for me but i'm not allow to sow any cloth aside ours on it.
I don't know if i'm making a right decision. I'm really scared because his family(10 in number) are psyco there is a lawyer among them and they always have each others back either right or wrong.
Nevertheless my family has little knowledge of all this. If my dad should get a clue, he will just end the marriage straight away, he is a man of action.
Pls help me good nigerian, i want to stay married but i want my freedom.
Re: Please Help Me by obowunmi(m): 11:41am On Jun 30, 2013
My dear, waits until he chops you open like Arowolo chopped his wife like a butcher carving fresh meat.

Be patient, heaven awaits your arrival.

2 Likes

Re: Please Help Me by sstartony: 11:48am On Jun 30, 2013
Afam4eva: Which kain husband be that? Was he behaving like this before you married him but continued hoping that things will change when you get married?

There's nothing like freedom in marraige. When you agree to marry, you have agreed to do things with your husband. If you want freedom then divorce him instead of living in the illusion that you're married.
He wasn't like this before, infact we were like romeo and juliet but everything changed when his mother set in, and started telling him 'how to be a real man'
Freedom that i mean is just to live a normal life.
Re: Please Help Me by firmi(m): 11:50am On Jun 30, 2013
obowunmi: My dear, waits until he chops you open like Arowolo chopped his wife like a butcher carving fresh meat.

Be patient, heaven awaits your arrival.

You are truly living your name. Monkey!!! angry.at op your husband should have an authority figure over him, that you can talk to. And why did you let things go bad to the extent of you using a knife. That's not sustainable in any way. Get good counselling (church or "family figures" ) God help you both. ..amen
Re: Please Help Me by obowunmi(m): 11:52am On Jun 30, 2013
firmi:
You are truly living your name. Monkey!!! angry.at op your husband should have an authority figure over him, that you can talk to. And why did you let things go bad to the extent of you using a knife. That's not sustainable in any way. Get goof counselling (church or "family figures"wink God help you both. ..amen

Goof counseling noni
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 11:53am On Jun 30, 2013
obowunmi: My dear, waits until he chops you open like Arowolo chopped his wife like a butcher carving fresh meat.

Be patient, heaven awaits your arrival.


Well, it would be a case of evolution at work. Natural selection, survival of the fittest.

Just imagine. This woman even has a sensible father that will do the right thing! Smh.

1 Like

Re: Please Help Me by EfemenaXY: 11:56am On Jun 30, 2013
@OP,

Is this what life in your home is like?? Ignore the title of the clip and replace muslim with sstarony's

So it reads: Life in sstartony's house


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esskJTqCYnY
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 12:08pm On Jun 30, 2013
What is wrong with these women??if dieing a Mrs is better than living a miss,then be prepared.
Re: Please Help Me by sstartony: 12:35pm On Jun 30, 2013
firmi:
at op your husband should have an authority figure over him, that you can talk to. And why did you let things go bad to the extent of you using a knife. That's not sustainable in any way. Get good counselling (church or "family figures" ) God help you both. ..amen

I took the knife because i've to stop him somehow, the one he did when i was pregnant made me got admitted to an hospital because i fell into false labour and when i eventually gave birth the baby was on oxygen for a week and cost him huge money to save the baby.
As for telling somebody, i have limited contact with people but i got our pastors' number through a bulletin and told them to set a meeting btw my husband and i but they should not tell my husband that i said anything.
That night he came home and ask if i call the pastor, i denied it. Only God knows what he told them but that was all i saw.
Re: Please Help Me by greatgod2012(f): 12:37pm On Jun 30, 2013
@op,If this your story is true, then, all i can say is....



YOUR LIFE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT MARRIAGE.

So, think deeply.

I do hope you undestand me.
May God help you.

1 Like

Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 12:47pm On Jun 30, 2013
This may sound uncool, but its either u are mad or ur hubby is

Someone needs to be slapped
Re: Please Help Me by biolabee(m): 12:51pm On Jun 30, 2013
sstartony:
He wasn't like this before, infact we were like romeo and juliet but everything changed when his mother set in, and started telling him 'how to be a real man'
Freedom that i mean is just to live a normal life.

Please can you explain... he started laying his hand on you at the behest of his mother?
Re: Please Help Me by EfemenaXY: 12:55pm On Jun 30, 2013
candygosh: This may sound uncool, but its either u are mad or ur hubby is

Someone needs to be slapped

First of all, this story isn't true. It's an attention seeking thread full of extremities geared towards achieving the shock factor /response from readers.

Secondly, if true (which I doubt), both the @OP and her hubby both need to be slapped. Moreso, the @OP herself.

Thirdly, this is the 21st century. Assuming the @OP did see the four walls of an educational system, she would have some grey matter to help her understand that marriage is not a do-or-die affair.

For goodness sake! Where's Debrief when you need her?? undecided

@OP, question for you: If your hubby (assuming you do have one) is as mind controlling as you say, how come you've been online chatting with strangers for over 2 hours??

2 Likes

Re: Please Help Me by firmi(m): 12:57pm On Jun 30, 2013
From the way you sound. That's more like a cage than a marriage. At this point the life and future of yourself and three kids is paramount. Before its too late. Please I beg you, secrecy would only make it thrive. Life is at stake here. Seek help.. pray you get d right wisdom to put this behind you. All the best
Re: Please Help Me by firmi(m): 1:02pm On Jun 30, 2013
Efemena_xy:

First of all, this story isn't true. It's an attention seeking thread full of extremities geared towards achieving the shock factor /response from readers.

Secondly, if true (which I doubt), both the @OP and her hubby both need to be slapped. Moreso, the @OP herself.

Thirdly, this is the 21st century. Assuming the @OP did see the four walls of an educational system, she would have some grey matter to help her understand that marriage is not a do or die affair.

For goodness sake! Where's Debrief when you need her?? undecided

@OP, question for you: If your hubby (assuming you do have one) is as mind controlling as you say, how come you've been online chatting with strangers for over 2 hours??
If dats the case the same problem he/she is seeking attention and response to will happen in greater proportions now or later if not no worries. No body wants to b in dat kind of situation
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 1:04pm On Jun 30, 2013
Efemena_xy:



@OP, question for you: If your hubby (assuming you do have one) is as mind controlling as you say, how come you've been online chatting with strangers for over 2 hours??

Op u seeu yanhsh for outside soo

Go Sleep
Re: Please Help Me by 2goodbobo(m): 2:43pm On Jun 30, 2013
Mrs this is not marriage but incarceration. As far as am concern, you are not his wife but his slave. Pray to God to grant you independence from this shackle you are in. Your husband is so possessive and wicked to be treating you like that. I hate men that beat women.

Is high time you let your family in on this so he does not kill you one day (God forbid). I can only imagine what you are going through. Did your husband exhibit this character when you guys were dating?

May God liberate you.
Re: Please Help Me by sstartony: 3:13pm On Jun 30, 2013
Efemena_xy:
@OP, question for you: If your hubby (assuming you do have one) is as mind controlling as you say, how come you've been online chatting with strangers for over 2 hours??

I purposely don't go to church with him this morning and right now i'm in the toilet. Besides he is not always at home.
Re: Please Help Me by ifegy: 3:26pm On Jun 30, 2013
@OP, PLEASE tell your family what's going on right away!!! You cannot go on like this. Life is too precious. Forget the shame and worry over what people will say. You must get help right away. Start with your family, since it seems they don't already know.
Re: Please Help Me by slimyem: 3:29pm On Jun 30, 2013
You had better let your father in on the situation asap if you value your life and that of your children.
Seriously,no sane person faced with what you are faced with should be asking what to do except you are waiting to act from the grave
Re: Please Help Me by Saraha1(f): 7:04pm On Jun 30, 2013
for now all you need is seperation frm that man you called husband.
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 7:35pm On Jun 30, 2013
sstartony:

I took the knife because i've to stop him somehow, the one he did when i was pregnant made me got admitted to an hospital because i fell into false labour and when i eventually gave birth the baby was on oxygen for a week and cost him huge money to save the baby.
As for telling somebody, i have limited contact with people but i got our pastors' number through a bulletin and told them to set a meeting btw my husband and i but they should not tell my husband that i said anything.
That night he came home and ask if i call the pastor, i denied it. Only God knows what he told them but that was all i saw.
Op r u for real abi is this one of nl nollywood testing script?
If its tru,then enjoy ur marriage but u gat to remember that u owe ur kids a normal life. U r responsible for them.
Re: Please Help Me by bellong: 8:54pm On Jun 30, 2013
sstartony:

I purposely don't go to church with him this morning and right now i'm in the toilet. Besides he is not always at home.

Which church and branch does he attend? He will be the subject of discussion in next sunday's sermon.
Whether your story is true or not, I see no reason under the earth why a man called husband will raise his hands and beat his wife. Very barbaric and uncultured.

You can't report to the police. Nigeria Police will tell you its a family affairs until they are called to investigate a murder case if it degenerates to it. While you still have your life and complete body parts, its high time you put the senses to use. Let no man under any circumstances turn you into a punching bag. Do the needful and necessary to fulfill your days before someone show you the gate to heaven before time.

While wasting the little precious time on nairaland, why not use it to call your dad and explain. Trust his judgement, your problem will be solved.
Re: Please Help Me by kreamidiva(f): 10:45pm On Jun 30, 2013
Do the wise thing....let ur family in on this and heed ur dad's advice. Hmmm life is too short o.
Re: Please Help Me by greatgod2012(f): 4:55am On Jul 01, 2013
sstartony:
As for telling somebody, i have limited contact with people but i got our pastors' number through a bulletin and told them to set a meeting btw my husband and i but they should
That night he came home and ask if i call the pastor, i denied it. Only God knows what he told them but that was all i saw.


this is what i use to say, there is too much hypocrisy in the church nowadays, no matter what, the pastor should have invited both of them for a meeting, and even, in the first instance, the pastor shouldnt have told the man that his wife called, because, if he wasnt told, there is no way he would ask his wife such question, but, who knows, whether the man is a generous man in the church and also towards the pastor, hence not seeing anything wrong in whatever hes doing wrong at home., plus, he may be afraid that if he confront the man, he would leave the church and they will miss his generosity, hhhmmmm hian, God dey watch, abi, is church not suppose to be a house of rescue

@op, since the church have dissapointed you, dont you think you should involve your family in this, your life is more important o, let your dad into what is happening, and let him do the right thing for you if you cant do it yourself. An abusive marriage is a no no for me, imagine, the day he beat you with pregnancy and you landed in the hospital, what if you died in the process of that Please, your life is more important than that miserable thing you call marriage, marriage is not even meant for such a man, imagine, locking you outside unclad, what if something unpalatable has happened to you during the dark hours of night And yet, you are so desperate to continuing being his wife, what exactly are you enjoying from him his money, who told you you cant make more money than him if you forget about him, his dick, what exactly can be good/sweet about a non-humane man's dick, or are you afraid of what people will say, what do you think they will say if you allow him to kill you, or you are staying because of your kids, then, tell me the kind of upbringing you are both giving the young ones, are you not trying to tell them indirectly to be violent in life, are you not telling the male kids to know how to beat up their wives when they get married and are you not also telling the female one that, that is how marriage should be, that she must always stay married, even when her life is at stake, what about the traumatic and pychological toment you are giving your kids, is it good for them health-wise and relationship-wise A word is enough for the wise.
May God help you.
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 5:29am On Jul 01, 2013
obowunmi: My dear, waits until he chops you open like Arowolo chopped his wife like a butcher carving fresh meat.

Be patient, heaven awaits your arrival.

The same thing I wanted to say
Is she retarded?
A man has beaten her up 15 times and chased her out to the house to sleep outside because her phone rang
Bashes her head on the wall for sport, and she is yet to tell her parents but comes on NL to ask help from strangers

She should stay there
The thread if a murdered housewife and her three kids will soon hit Punch and Seun Osewa will put it on front page for us to comment
Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 5:43am On Jul 01, 2013
sstartony: Pls do not mind my grammar, i'm working on it but constuctive critisisms are welcome, you can even rate me.
I got married Nov/2007, i have three kids (2 girls, 1boy). My husband beats me anytime that pleases him, if i should count the number of times i know it's over 15 times now.
He slapped me for smacking our daughter, when the food is late even when i was pregnant all because i came home 2 hrs late from antenatal, he goes to office with the keys to the gate, he goes to market himself, he stalks the house with food, he doesn't let me further my education, he never gives me cash,he doesn't let me get office job, those that i got he wrote them to sack me, i'm sure he will soon ask you people to block me out here.
He made me sleep outside nakedly on friday because my phone rang@11:50pm, and it was just an alarm to wake me up for prayer. The phone was already off but the alarm which i've set to ring still did so my husband took the phone to see who called but met the phone off. He thought that i delibrately switched of the phone, grabed my hair and kept banging my head on the wall, i managed to escape to the kitchen and took a knife to threating him, he just pushed me out of the house and lock the door.
I've been doing alot of thinking since that friday, all that comes to my mind is to go to police station to make him sign undertaken that he will not touch me again and that he will not touch my property because i've decided to get a shop, buy my own machine since i can sow and make cake, though he bought a machine for me but i'm not allow to sow any cloth aside ours on it.
I don't know if i'm making a right decision. I'm really scared because his family(10 in number) are psyco there is a lawyer among them and they always have each others back either right or wrong.
Nevertheless my family has little knowledge of all this. If my dad should get a clue, he will just end the marriage straight away, he is a man of action.
Pls help me good nigerian, i want to stay married but i want my freedom.

You need to wake up fast
I won't color this for you
I will tell you the plain truth that you must hear
You have done well by starting this thread

Now listen to me and listen good!!

First and foremost your father and the rest of your family should know exactly what is going on in that hell you call a home
Pack up your kids and take all your valuables pay them a surprise visit ,sit your mom and dad and older siblings down and tell them all.
I mean everything exactly as it has been ,starting from 2007.
That may be the last time you stepped foot in that hammer house of horror,I trust your folks are reasonable enough especially by the way u described your dad.


This is not normal,let me just tell you this up front and your police undertaking is just a worthless piece of paper ,it won't stop the hot slaps or the heads on the wall.

And you enable him by taking the battery because you want to answer Mrs
Are you kidding me?
If you want your children to become motherless and turn into househelps for the next wife,you can keep suffering in silence,that man will kill you or endanger you enough to be killed.
He is already sending you out in the streets naked,a wife?

There is a young woman,a relative of a friend that is lying in coma in a hospital as we speak
A victim of a monster husband who beat her to unconsciousness
That is where you are headed if you don't do something right now
Remember that he is also teaching your son to be the type of man he is and your daughters what they should expect from a man
You need to wake up fast!
Or you can go ahead and answer Mrs somebody until you end up with a blind eye,a deaf ear,toothless with permanent scars or like Mrs Arowolo the banker of 3 years ago that was chopped into ngwo ngwo pieces by her own husband.
The choice is yours


Please don't tell him you are leaving o
Some of these animals become more rabid when they have wind of your escape
Don't mention it at all
Just leave
Anything he wants to say after you are gone,the discussion should be happening with your parents right there solidly behind you

1 Like

Re: Please Help Me by Nobody: 5:51am On Jul 01, 2013
All I can say is better not write one of those annoying letters from the grave.
You have made your own adult choices to die in the hands of someone who doesn't care.
You refuse to tell your family because they are sane people who will drag you of your suicide mission.
You are the one who can help yourself, my own sha, don't write any annoyning letter from the grave.
Goodluck

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