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We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming - Romance - Nairaland

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We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by inspiredm(m): 12:05am On Jun 30, 2008
http://sunnewsonline.com/webpages/news/national/2008/jun/29/national-29-06-2008-001.htm

W-a-n-t-e-d
‘We need husbands, but men not forthcoming’
Doctors warn about late marriages

“In that day, seven women will take hold one man and say, ‘we will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace.’”
The above passage is taken from the Holy Bible, specifically Isaiah 4: 1.


Prophetically, the day or era under reference, it would seem, is here. Indeed, never before than now have women been so worried about getting married, even doing untoward things to earn the prefix – Mrs.

With 140 million people, sex ratio of Nigeria’s population does not put women at a disadvantage. Yet there seems to be some sort of role reversal, as women now confront men with the question: “Will you marry me?”

So what is the problem? Why the scramble? Where are the eligible bachelors? Who would mop up the legion of ladies that scramble for the bouquet at the end of each wedding ceremony?
The situation has, in fact, taken a desperate dimension as a crop of
beautiful and successful women allege conspiracy by bachelors to keep them guessing. Consequently, they would not cease to bemoan the seeming unwillingness by eligible bachelors to propose marriage.
The bachelors, Sunday Sun learnt, are “made, ripe and ready” but refrain from proposing. They date the girls around serially but foot-drag, decline to take any of the heartthrobs to the altar or marriage registry and pronounce the noble words: “I do”.

Hiring and firing

The obviously heartbroken girls also accuse the foot-loose fellows of “fancy free” and engaging in “adding and dropping”. Disclosing in intimate details how a guy she had gone out with for over two years “dumped” her, a lady who only gave her pet name as “Mimi” said. “The guy at first told me we were getting married. I opened my heart to him, gave him my love and my all but just when I thought we were settling down, he brought in another girl and threw me out.”
Feeling cheated and hard-done-by, Mimi angrily flared up: “Look, men are not serious any more. They prefer hanging out with different girls but not keen on settling down. They only taste and go.” grin grin grin

Wrong move

For not easily explained reason, the old guys are flying without perching. Empress Njamah, an actress believes the guys are scared of getting into the wrong hands. Said she: “They are scared of settling down with the wrong babes. And it’s also affecting the women. Men should change their mentality. For those thinking of money before marriage, they should know that most women want to marry love before money.”

Cossy Orjiakor, believes marriage can be daunting for a man who doesn’t have enough materially. “He has to think of shelter for his family, and you know, babies too will have to be taken care of,” she said. Considering herself lucky, as she claims to receive a lot of marriage proposals every week, Cossy explained that good looking, rich men find it difficult to decide who they want because, “a lot of girls chase them and say yes.” cool cool
As though settling down to her is an oddity, Cossy told Sunday Sun: “It’s only the average people who are getting married now.”

Fear of commitment
Big Brother Africa first runner-up, Ofunneka Molokwu says men are scared to make commitment. “They’re scared to commit themselves to something they are not sure of, and I think it’s affecting women as well,” she said.
Single and still-searching, the affable celebrity sees marriage as a game of chance -something that has 50 per cent probability of not working. She attributes the trend to high divorce rate and prevalence of broken homes. “If you look around, most families are either separated or divorced. So, men are bidding their time rather than rush in and rush out soon,” she lectured.
One of the hot cake bachelors on the entertainment scene, Segun Obe shares the same concern with Ofunneka. Hear him: “You have to be sure of what you‘re doing and be sure that you will not rush out of it.”

Shot gun option
As a way out of this dicey situation, Ofunneka revealed that a lot of ‘ripe women’ are having kids out of wedlock. Though she decline to disclose if she was considering the shot gun option, she however told Sunday Sun that running a relationship is a huge stress. To get by, she said: “People now procreate -have kids out of wedlock and raise them single-handedly.” shocked shocked shocked

Fools rush…
Funke Akindele, an actress feels that only fools rush into a place where angels fear to go into. To her, the lull in marital affairs is attributable to the impatience of women. “Most single ladies compare themselves to married women and start getting worried. I think it’s this comparison that gives the impression of scarcity of husbands,” she said, praying to God Almighty to give her a man of her own.
Another star actress, Ronke Ojo, alias Oshodi Oke, thinks husbands abound. “I don’t believe men are scarce. If I want to marry four husbands tomorrow, I can comfortably do so,” she boasted. shocked shocked shocked

Drowned by number

A police officer, Jonathan Osaze told Sunday Sun that women far out-number men, and this, to him, explains cheesy cheesyThe good ones are few and that’s the reason we take our time. No man would like to rush into it and regret later”
Stifling economy
A gospel artiste and chronic bachelor, Sammie Okposo, have kept the girls guessing over the years. He told Sunday Sun that Nigerian men now prefer career to marriage. In his own words: “A lot of young men these days are in pursuit of money and career. The urge for them to get married is not there. They would rather make all the money first, get established before they think of marriage.”

Huge cost of marriage

Frank Onwordi, a businessman and seemingly a comfortable bachelor blames the lull on the downturn of the nation’s economy.
“The economy is bad and marriage is expensive. A man needs a roof over his head, big purse before embarking on marriage. You know how it is - buying this and that for traditional, court registry and the church marriage ceremonies. The whole thing is expensive and there’s no money,” he laments.

‘Over successful’
Bankole Adelani, a staff of one of the GSM providers told Sunday Sun that the real reason is that a bunch of the old spinsters are damn too successful. “Imagine the girl you love owning her own house, a big jeep plus other cars, has a steady job and flies in and out of the country. Man, the whole thing is intimidating. How can you measure up with such a high flier?” he asked and sighed deeply with resignation.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by ikamefa(f): 12:11am On Jun 30, 2008
yeah right !!

what a load of rubbish

Nostradamus's likkle siblings are seeing Armageddon again? cheesy grin cheesy grin cheesy grin
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 12:16am On Jun 30, 2008
*yawns*
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 12:21am On Jun 30, 2008
only a man could make a post like this.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by Mesmerize(f): 12:22am On Jun 30, 2008
Is this husband season or what?
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by eldee(m): 12:32am On Jun 30, 2008
Why are you guys hating?
This is actually a well researched post
Swear down, if I saw a post like this anywhere, even against men, I'll actually read it before making comments


@poster
More of these abeg, we even need sumone like you on the music section
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 12:34am On Jun 30, 2008
Mesmerize:

Is this husband season or what?

No, this is desperate season. cheesy
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 12:51am On Jun 30, 2008
More like rejected losers making threads trying to blackmail females into considering them.


"Go out with me na, else you will end uip old and dry like that one NL thread I saw"
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by eldee(m): 12:58am On Jun 30, 2008
@TOH
Yeah right, and he got Empress Njamah, Sammie Okposo, Ofunneka and them lot to support him abi?

@Poster
That Fear Of Commitment point is not really our fault
Look at the rates of divorces initiated by women . . . abeg, it's safer to stay smart and enjoy
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 12:59am On Jun 30, 2008
TOH:

More like rejected losers making threads trying to blackmail females into considering them.


"Go out with me na, else you will end uip old and dry like that one Nairaland thread I saw"

LMFAO!!!! that is so true!!! cheesy cheesy cheesy
eldee:


@Poster
That Fear Of Commitment point is not really our fault
Look at the rates of divorces initiated by women . . . abeg, it's safer to stay smart and enjoy



what do you mean?? you sound like men dont initiate divorce at all that is the women's fault.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by eldee(m): 1:05am On Jun 30, 2008
onyinye2:

what do you mean?? you sound like men don't initiate divorce at all that is the women's fault.
Two-thirds of American divorces are initiated by women, others by various reasons like irresolvable differences from both parties
And a few by men . . . why will we initiate divorce when we lose the cash?
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:07am On Jun 30, 2008
eldeethe fact you are even supporting such an "article" says alot

‘Over successful’
Bankole Adelani, a staff of one of the GSM providers told Sunday Sun that the real reason is that a bunch of the old spinsters are damn too successful. “Imagine the girl you love owning her own house, a big jeep plus other cars, has a steady job and flies in and out of the country. Man, the whole thing is intimidating. How can you measure up with such a high flier?” he asked and sighed deeply with resignation.

This completely REEKS of insecure men. If you have a daughter would you not wish that she is successful.If they have freaking problem s, let them mmarry village chics. Abi ki lo de? They claim they want someone with intelligence and they can converse with YET they don't want her to be well-read?
and please don't give me that lame excuse of "well read chics act very arrogant and they look down on their husbands", even ajepakos are arrogant. If a person is naturally arrogant whether they are successful or not, they will still act that way.

The whole whining about successful women is so pathetic and embarrassing. Frankly I'm bored from hearing about it.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 1:08am On Jun 30, 2008
@eldee
What!! you make women sound like gold diggers. and where in the world do you get you data from?? cause something tells me that you are basically making it all up.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:08am On Jun 30, 2008
eldee:

Two-thirds of American divorces are initiated by women, others by various reasons like irresolvable differences from both parties
And a few by men . . . why will we initiate divorce when we lose the cash?

What concerns a Nigerian article with American divorce. Face your backyard please.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by Nobody: 1:11am On Jun 30, 2008
Why's this topic revised over and over again?
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:13am On Jun 30, 2008
stillwater:

Why's this topic revised over and over again?

so boring isnt it.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 1:13am On Jun 30, 2008
@stillwater

because these so called men can not deal with their insecure issues so they blame women for it. and get the attention from fellow male Nairaland to back them up so they can feel better.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by tpia: 1:20am On Jun 30, 2008
this is why some men will take their grey hair go drop them pikin for kindergarten. First born pikin oh, not last born. undecided

Nothing wrong with that anyway. No one said life is perfect.




Though I really dont feel most of these "picky" guys are that much better than the girls they look down on as not being marriage material.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by Sisikill: 1:23am On Jun 30, 2008
ROTFLMAO. . .  the entire article read like a long joke and this was the punchline

Over successful’
Bankole Adelani, a staff of one of the GSM providers told Sunday Sun that the real reason is that a bunch of the old spinsters are damn too successful. “Imagine the girl you love owning her own house, a big jeep plus other cars, has a steady job and flies in and out of the country. Man, the whole thing is intimidating. How can you measure up with such a high flier?” he asked and sighed deeply with resignation.
 


He's right you know. . . I mean ladies, now is the time to be honest with ourselves. You guys might hate me but I will say my own oh.

Haba, Why would we want to. . .

1) Do an amazing job and get promoted when we can sit on your behind all day doing a shitty job while stuffing our faces with Boli and Epa. How can our future husbands treat us like useless appendages if we make our own money, eh? Come on now, it's just all sorts of wrong.

2) Live in the privacy of a nice bungalow or flat when we can have live in a face me, I face you block of flats, which comes with the added pleasure of listening to Iya Basira screaming at Basira for burning the 10 day old soup. . . the smell you try desperately not to choke on.

3) And seriously, where is the fun in opening your garage, getting into your well serviced car and driving off, when you can throw your purse around your neck, fold your wrapper between your thighs and jump into a moving molue, as you fervently pray the perverted conductor does not handle your breasts and that today will be the day you get out of the bus without reeking of sweat, BO and stale beer.

Aaaah! Now that is the life! Hmmm break me a piece of that ASAP!!!

Thanks OP for posting this article, it confirms exactly what some of us have always thought. . . Men are insecure.

More please  grin
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by eldee(m): 1:23am On Jun 30, 2008
TOH:

eldeethe fact you are even supporting such an "article" says alot

This completely REEKS of insecure men. If you have a daughter would you not wish that she is successful.If they have freaking problem s, let them mmarry village chics. Abi ki lo de? They claim they want someone with intelligence and they can converse with YET they don't want her to be well-read?
and please don't give me that lame excuse of "well read chics act very arrogant and they look down on their husbands", even ajepakos are arrogant. If a person is naturally arrogant whether they are successful or not, they will still act that way.

The whole whining about successful women is so pathetic and embarrassing. Frankly I'm bored from hearing about it.
He listed nine points and the only one you could choose was the one on male insecurity?

If a person is naturally arrogant? So mean increase in financial status does not have anyfin to do with being pompous?

TOH:

What concerns a Nigerian article with American divorce. Face your backyard please.
That's the one we see on CNN
That's just a sample space that's available to help you form an opinion
Aight . . . provide me with Nigeria's marriage stats undecided
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:28am On Jun 30, 2008
eldee:

He listed nine points and the only one you could choose was the one on male insecurity?

Yes. Is there a problem? It's the most pathetic point in the entire article.

f anything the other point just says too many people are in a rush and get too desperate which iornically contradicts the reason why this thread was even made in the first place.


Aight . . . provide me with Nigeria's marriage stats undecided

Why should I? Am I the only that constantly screams "OMG HIGH DIVORCE RATE" in every bloody thread? If anyone should look for the Nigerian stats it's you.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by NubianQ(f): 1:31am On Jun 30, 2008
Not again! whats dis thing about marriage
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:32am On Jun 30, 2008
Lmao SisiKill

Exactly jare. Insecure nitwits I tell you. Some are so pathetic the only way they THINK they can hurt a woman is by syaing "that's why no one will marry you!" "you'll see when you end up old and dry"

Bunch of bloody children.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:33am On Jun 30, 2008
NubianQ:

Not again! whats this thing about marriage

Lmao NL boys wnat to get marriage and their best plan now is blackmail
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 1:35am On Jun 30, 2008
TOH:

Lmao Nairaland boys wnat to get marriage and their best plan now is blackmail

LMFAO!!! i know. i guess they are tired of begging like puppies so they have moved on to blackmail. what is next??
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by Nobody: 1:35am On Jun 30, 2008
NubianQ:

Not again! whats this thing about marriage

so u're not getting married? bravo.

TOH:

Lmao Nairaland boys wnat to get marriage and their best plan now is blackmail

If NL boys need to get married there's way too much opportunity to do that. i dont think anyone is particularly interested in blackmail.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by NubianQ(f): 1:36am On Jun 30, 2008
i am sick off marry this marry that. so should single peeps like me go jump of a cliff?
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by Nobody: 1:39am On Jun 30, 2008
NubianQ:

i am sick off marry this marry that. so should single peeps like me go jump of a cliff?

grin why does marriage needle you so? Dont jump off the cliff yet, we still need single people to decorate our wedding halls . . . those of us who dont want to be single. wink
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by TOH(f): 1:41am On Jun 30, 2008
davidylan:

If Nairaland boys need to get married there's way too much opportunity to do that. i don't think anyone is particularly interested in blackmail.

Speak for yourself David

All these antics are nothing but blackmail.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by NubianQ(f): 1:42am On Jun 30, 2008
To be honest, its not like i wont want to get married but if it doesnt come i am ok with it, i am open minded about being single or married cuz u cant force things to happen. in the old days it was easier, nowadays its crazy out there. personally, i am not bothered about being married or not.
davidylan:

grin why does marriage needle you so? Dont jump off the cliff yet, we still need single people to decorate our wedding halls . . . those of us who don't want to be single. wink

well, thing is i dont think so much emphasis should be put on marriage cuz there is more to life than being married, i respect the union of marriage but i dont lose sleep over it.
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by eldee(m): 1:43am On Jun 30, 2008
TOH:

If anything the other point just says too many people are in a rush and get too desperate which iornically contradicts the reason why this thread was even made in the first place.
Nah . . . it only gave the view of one person on the matter
That Funke sumn still believes the problem is just virtual

Which is the writer's way of mocking the psychological approach women put to it

The moment they start trying to rush into marriage, they automaticaly become spinsters
And that's one of the things adding to the problem

TOH:

Why should I? Am I the only that constantly screams "OMG HIGH DIVORCE RATE" in every bloody thread? If anyone should look for the Nigerian stats it's you.
Then leave me with my own sample space . . . I'll form my opinion from there
Re: We Need Husbands, But Men Not Forthcoming by onyinye2(f): 1:44am On Jun 30, 2008
@Nubian

there is some truth in what you say. there is truly nothing wrong with staying single and focusing on your life or job. smiley but the only problem is that you job cant comfort you at night when you are weary. undecided

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