My fellow unmarried women, it’s not that I have a vendetta against you; I just want to address some of the things you do, which I think are supremely silly. Yes, I’m ranting about the unmarried women today. This post is targeted at, but not limited to desperate unmarried women.

I know that marriage has always been an important thing for many women, but the race for it today is becoming so bad, it’s almost diabolic. Yes, many women are doing all sorts of infernal things to get stay married. Young woman that wants to get married, pause a bit and ask yourself this important question: why do I want to get married?

I ask you to do this because your reason for getting married may very well determine the kind of man you hook up with. If you want to be happy in your union, you’ll carefully and prayerfully choose a spouse. But if you want to be married because all your friends are, or because your family thinks so or because society says your clock is ticking, you may very well end up making the wrong choice. Such as a man that abuses you-be it physically, verbally, emotionally or psychologically.
No matter what you say, there are always signs of an abuser, whether he’s a budding or full-blown practitioner of the punching, verbal or emotional slicing arts.

When a man makes you stay on a video chat for 24 hours, just so that he can see where you are at all times, he’s an abuser. Please don’t tell me that “he’s just a bit jealous” or “you know men are like that”….that’s not “a bit” of jealousy and not all men are like that!

When a man makes you take pictures of yourself and send it to him 24 hours a day, so he knows where and who you’re with, my sister you’re in bondage…..only that your master hasn’t paid your purchase price. Any man that makes you do this, under the guise that his heart has been broken by the previous women in his life and therefore, you need to earn his trust, is a confirmed wizard. He needs Jesus and you need a copy of the Slavery Abolition Act of 1833.

When a man flings objects at you during an argument, throws and breaks his phone against the wall and says “Look what you made me do,” he will one day throw you and blame you for it. You’d better run away and from that far distance, text him the number of a psychiatrist and enrol him for an anger management course.

When a man tells you that once you get married, because his mother did it, you too will pound yam for him while you’re nine months pregnant, wash his car, feed your three children and drop them off at school, clean the house, do the family laundry, go shopping etc. without help of any sort, I’ll only say this: are you familiar with the letters R.U.N?

When you’re in a relationship with a man who arbitrarily picks up your phone, deletes some male contacts, text messages, grills you whenever you pick a call from a man, logs into your Facebook account and abuses and warns off all the men who say nice things to you, tells you which friends to keep and the ones to dismiss, and short of getting you a bodyguard, monitors your movements in every way possible, I’d like to inform you that that man is not man who loves you, but a monitirung, familiar spirit. The earlier you’re delivered from him, the better for you.

Having said that, I’d like to add that some of this kind of men can smell desperation and know that there’s little or nothing you can or would want to do to them.
So my advice to you dear prospective bride, is build your self-esteem, be proud of who you are, be picky (yes, contrary to popular opinion, you don’t have to drag the bottom of the barrel), and know that you deserve a good man. Take your time; because once you make your choice, you’re stuck with him. Don’t be in haste- for where the hare gets to by running, the tortoise will arrive there by walking.

#‎IThinkI 'mDoneRantingForToday

SOURCE

Lovely write-up...

Damn I was in a mood to fight!

Bravo!

……

GBAM!

Lovely post! Unfortunately, common sense is not common.

It's easy to say these things and hope that unmarried women heed, but the truth is that societal/cultural and family pressures are partly to blame, if not entirely. Also, a lot of women lack the mental and emotional strength required to stand for themselves, or have become complacent with mediocrity and sacrificed self-respect for a husband. It's from a Nigerian woman's mouth that you will hear things like "cheating is the norm; there's nothing you can do about it". Some unluckily marry the wrong man and will still quote the Bible and tell you that under no circumstances, adultery and domestic violence inclusive, can a woman file for divorce. That's disheartening and is setting a very wrong trend for our daughters to follow. I don't know from where the "a woman's pride is her husband/marriage" came, and I don't know how or why it's unofficially compulsory for a woman to marry before a certain age, hence making some women rush and settle for sub-par males, but it's part of the reason why some men see themselves as gods and do as they wish to them.

Nothing could be truer than the last part of your post. Society, culture, tradition, and even family won't change, not fast enough anyway. The change that's so greatly needed as per this topic can only come from women changing their mindsets and loving themselves to the point that they will not settle for less, even if it means waiting a little longer.

A woman should gain more than a man and ring in marriage. She should gain a partner, a teammate, a companion... someone who appreciates her in totality. And guess what? Such men don't come easily, so be patient.

^^ you have said it all.
@op nice post

Thank you for a great post, OP!

Nice one, @op.

This is a front page topic. Let all those banga girls, read it and advice themselves.

Cool write up!!!

Mz Vox:

When a man makes you stay on a video chat for 24 hours, just so that he can see where you are at all times, he’s an abuser. Please don’t tell me that “he’s just a bit jealous” or “you know men are like that”….that’s not “a bit” of jealousy and not all men are like that!

When a man makes you take pictures of yourself and send it to him 24 hours a day, so he knows where and who you’re with, my sister you’re in bondage…..only that your master hasn’t paid your purchase price. Any man that makes you do this, under the guise that his heart has been broken by the previous women in his life and therefore, you need to earn his trust, is a confirmed wizard. He needs Jesus and you need a copy of the Slavery Abolition Act of 1833.

When a man flings objects at you during an argument, throws and breaks his phone against the wall and says “Look what you made me do,” he will one day throw you and blame you for it. You’d better run away and from that far distance, text him the number of a psychiatrist and enrol him for an anger management course.

When a man tells you that once you get married, because his mother did it, you too will pound yam for him while you’re nine months pregnant, wash his car, feed your three children and drop them off at school, clean the house, do the family laundry, go shopping etc. without help of any sort, I’ll only say this: are you familiar with the letters R.U.N?

When you’re in a relationship with a man who arbitrarily picks up your phone, deletes some male contacts, text messages, grills you whenever you pick a call from a man, logs into your Facebook account and abuses and warns off all the men who say nice things to you, tells you which friends to keep and the ones to dismiss, and short of getting you a bodyguard, monitors your movements in every way possible, I’d like to inform you that that man is not man who loves you, but a monitirung, familiar spirit. The earlier you’re delivered from him, the better for you.


#‎IThinkI 'mDoneRantingForToday

The bolded Parts Cracked Me up

They all know,but can't help it, they say they are in love and love is blind.
I only pray for them.

God help us all. Amen

Nice and useful piece. Thanks!

nothing to say!

ms_pee: Nice and useful piece. Thanks!

what useful here!

ok ok!! unmarried men nko biko? we need advice too!

God bless you Op.
This is the truth.

Well I'm not abusive, neither am I a control freak. I am also not a stalker, and like to give ladies their space.

So I guess I'm a catch, problem is though, I'm quite slippery.

Orisirisi topic, now you will see all the Ada beke's and Olosho popping up to commend the OP, like someone said, so many women are single today because of their pride to be submissive to their husbands, Marriage is not a competition of who owns the best things, some are not married but they are happy, and only their Pillows knows how much pains they feel each night. Nobody should quote me sha

Mrs.Chima:
Damn I was in a mood to fight!

Bravo!

Ngwanu, bia yia ogu

AkaOkpo

Nice rite up..but @ op wot kind of man will u recommend since u can neva find a perfect being

wow. so some men do all the things in this write-up?

i thank God for my man.

sweetheart, know that I love you and you are indeed a rare gem

Some men are not looking for wives, they are looking for baby popping machines, laundry women, cooks and nannies. Once you are married to this type of man, he takes pleasure in younger women, beware of men like this too.

And Rita Dominic will be feeling proud after reading this write up. I hope Madam Ogugua88 has read it as well. Marriage is a matter of choice......getting a child is all that matters. Now all the old single ladies.......start consoling yourselves and hustle for children.

See frustration! Nne is this loads of experience from others abi guys don dump you taya?
Anyway, please change or attach "Nigeria women" some where in the topic!






But you talk true shaa! Some sisters dey fall my hand how they deal with guys!