I have noticed that the latest trend in this country is the case of marriage brutality and domestic violence. I really do not understand this at all. This week alone, I have heard over 5 different ladies over public channels (Radio and Television) advising other ladies not to stay in a marriage that is abusive and all.

For one, I would never hit a woman and I utterly detest domestic violence. But, the problem is worse than that. Ladies say men will turn you into a punching bag etc... But have you ever stopped to wonder for once what the problem is? Why would a man you loved so much to the extent that you could say 'yes' to suddenly turn into an animal and hit you up and down? Do not get me wrong; some men have mental problems. But that is just a few of them.

Women of nowadays, because of the rate of exposure and achievements that they have attained, now feel they are equal to men but this is totally false. They are both humans but the husband is a King and most times, the wife tries to be the king, instead of a queen. Most marriages are more of competition and contests than the original reason for the marriage; which is to love and help each other. You see a case where a husband and a wife are both working and trying to show which one is superior and more intelligent. In this part of the world, the man is the breadwinner and ought to be respected by his wife. A man (well, most men) will never raise his hands against you if they do not see you as a threat and that is the truth. Now back to the ladies making such advises. To be honest, I have see a couple of cases where the husband was really provoked. Some ladies do not know how to talk. They provoke the husband and the man hits them, then they go around without saying what really went on. I really wish you could get a camera and record most of these domestic violence incidents. You won't ever believe that is was the woman that caused the provocation. Men are physical and muscular. And by nature, the best way to show their dominance is to use their physique. So, if a man you loved and loved you back hits you, he felt you were trying to compete with him in his space.

Most of these ladies talking and giving advice on the radio are not even married, talkless of having boyfriends so they can say anything they want. Ask them if they will be where they are now if their parents walked out of their marriages. Please, I don't want to be mis-understood, if your husband hits you FOR NO REASON, kindly walk out. But, if you know deep inside you that you pushed him to do it, kindly work on that part and do not do it again. It's as simple as that. The rate of divorce is very high. Nowadays, women go into marriage with a clear conscious option to move out if they feel uncomfortable. So, by that, there is a high tendency to misbehave.

Men, if you hit your wives with the slightest provocation, it's simple. You are not fit to be a man. You are simply an animal. Because I can't just imagine how you will hit a delicate creature so hard like you are hitting your fellow man. Let's leave a good legacy for our kids. Be guided!

Women of nowadays, because of the rate of exposure and achievements that they have attained, now feel they are equal to men but this is totally false.

will never raise his hands against you if they do not see you as a threat and that is the truth. Now back to the ladies making such advises. To be honest, I have see a couple of cases where the husband was really provoked. Some ladies do not know how to talk. They provoke the husband and the man hits them, then they go around without saying what really went on. I really wish you could get a camera and record most of these domestic violence incidents. You won't ever believe that is was the woman that caused the provocation. Men are physical and muscular. And by nature, the best way to show their dominance is to use their physique. So, if a man you loved and loved you back hits you, he felt you were trying to compete with him in his space

Most of these ladies talking and giving advice on the radio are not even married, talkless of having boyfriends so they can say anything they want. Ask them if they will be where they are now if their parents walked out of their marriages. Please, I don't want to be mis-understood, if your husband hits you FOR NO REASON, kindly walk out.

Thank you.

*Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew*

Kanwulia:



Thank you.

You are welcome. *When you appear softer and feminine, you appeal to his instinct to protect. When you appear more aggressive, you appeal to his instinct to compete.* That is the way it is!

lucarella:

You are welcome. *When you appear softer and feminine, you appeal to his instinct to protect. When you appear more aggressive, you appeal to his instinct to compete.* That is the way it is!

Keep exposing your 'ROYAL BUSHNESS'!
Nothing do you!

I'm equal to a man, come and bite me.

u rite.last sartday i took my son to a comiti of frnds meetin(beside our house)imediatly we got there my son started crying,so i decided to take him back so i could return to d meetin.wen i got home n told mywife y i returnd him,d nxt word that came out of her mouth was "y stupidly aviodin ur responsibility as a father".well,i simply went out.WOMEN,wen it comes to stuffs dat benefits they claim equality but on issues of financial responsibility one suddenly bcoms "the man of the house".lol

lucarella: A man (well, most men) will never raise his hands against you if they do not see you as a threat and that is the truth. Now back to the ladies making such advises. To be honest, I have see a couple of cases where the husband was really provoked. Some ladies do not know how to talk. They provoke the husband and the man hits them, then they go around without saying what really went on. I really wish you could get a camera and record most of these domestic violence incidents. You won't ever believe that is was the woman that caused the provocation. Men are physical and muscular. And by nature, the best way to show their dominance is to use their physique. So, if a man you loved and loved you back hits you, he felt you were trying to compete with him in his space.

Of course! I too can walk up to anyone on the street, give them a big blow and say I was provoked because I didn't like the looks of their face........An abuser will always find a reason to be provoked.


Now, read this thread and stop peddling falsehoods and encouraging victim blaming.
https://www.nairaland.com/1444825/abused-wives-girlfriends-men

Op a man never has a reason to hit a woman.

If you hit someone because of what they said to you then you are an uncivilized untamed animal. I don't care if you are a man or woman. That's just rubbish. What you said up there is the excuse that ALL abusers use. Do you really think that an abuser will not say "she made me do it?". The only time that physical force is necessary is to protect yourself from physical injury. She provoked him with her words? Is this Kindergarten or are we talking to adults here.

Mavrick2012: u rite.last sartday i took my son to a comiti of frnds meetin(beside our house)imediatly we got there my son started crying,so i decided to take him back so i could return to d meetin.wen i got home n told mywife y i returnd him,d nxt word that came out of her mouth was "y stupidly aviodin ur responsibility as a father".well,i simply went out.WOMEN,wen it comes to stuffs dat benefits they claim equality but on issues of financial responsibility one suddenly bcoms "the man of the house".lol

According to the OP you could have given her two swift punches to the head and a kick in the a55 cause she provoked you. Seriously though that was not funny. You're laughing but your partner just called you "stupid". Hopefully not in front of the kid.

Kanwulia:

Keep exposing your 'ROYAL BUSHNESS'!
Nothing do you!

Well, thank God some of us are not as silly as you are. . Just walk out if you get beaten by your husband because I see that coming soon.

soul_glo: If you hit someone because of what they said to you then you are an uncivilized untamed animal. I don't care if you are a man or woman. That's just rubbish. What you said up there is the excuse that ALL abusers use. Do you really think that an abuser will not say "she made me do it?". The only time that physical force is necessary is to protect yourself from physical injury. She provoked him with her words? Is this Kindergarten or are we talking to adults here.

It is not an excuse. It's a fact. You decided to see what you wanted to see which is typical of human beings. I do not condone beating and abuse and I made that clear but obviously you missed that. Excuse me, who is an abuser? You certainly do not have any idea of what you are saying. Some women would have emotionally abused the man that the only thing left for him to do is to use his fists. Which is also not right, and not justifiable but is it not sensible for a woman not to get on the man's nerves and let everyone live in peace. The women start these things and then say men are animals. You turned him into an animal! Can you show your husband love and he reciprocates by beating you? You have a brain located in your head; use it!

ileobatojo:

Of course! I too can walk up to anyone on the street, give them a big blow and say I was provoked because I didn't like the looks of their face........An abuser will always find a reason to be provoked.


Now, read this thread and stop peddling falsehoods and encouraging victim blaming.
https://www.nairaland.com/1444825/abused-wives-girlfriends-men

I have never seen a woman so caring to her husband and the husband uses his fists. It takes both parties to start a quarrel. If one party chooses not to have a quarrel, there is no quarrel. It's as simple as that.

Many men are going to have a second think coming in this generation. I tell ya!
Don't go and learn and treat your spouse like a human being like yourself, dey there dey call yourself as king, somebody go hear wen, I tell ya!
Any man who must say, "I am the king" is no true king. ... Tywin Lannister

Your wife would be the judge if you are a king or not.

Kanwulia:

Thank you.

*Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew*

Lol!

You know, for a moment you really got me worried there! Thought you fell for his drivel up there.

@OP, stop sitting on the fence and take a stance - a proper stance - instead of head hopping. Makes you come across as less then intelligent.

lucarella:

Well, thank God some of us are not as silly as you are. . Just walk out if you get beaten by your husband because I see that coming soon.

Huhn! All these NL 'SEUN-ASSSHAWOS' aka AAAAAAAAAAAASHAWO EDINBURGH TO SEATTLE nor dey taya to open useless threads!
You think everyone is from Ogun/Lagos States or Abia/Anambra States where women still have or-ga-sms even while being roasted like SUYA for SALLAH huhu?

Make you dream on dear! Your prerogative
Na YOU go COMMIT SWEEECIDE for NL f0rst with ya own silliness. . . like your fellow LOW-SELF-ESTEEMED FATHERLY-SODOMIZED, LOVELESS WRETCHES OF NL!

Won't be surprised if you are one of those useless MUKINA2 or IKAMEFA pseudo-monikers with the characteristic 'tongue-in-cheek' silliness.
You sef go soon DIE troway like that your TWINNY abi na tripleTTY called 'IICE'!
Ewu!

Common move! Asssssssssssssssssssshawo 'DEBOSKY'!

Efemena_xy:

Lol!

You know, for a moment you really got me worried there! Thought you fell for his drivel up there.

I am from EDO-DELTA. . . not FROM THE NORTH, EAST OR WEST OF NIGERIA.

Women from my area ESPECIALLY. . . were not raised without FATHERS to put up with abuse from any man, woman, child or spirit.

I can NEVER fall for such 'DRIVEL'. . . EVEN IF I WERE DEAD!

Kanwulia:

Keep exposing your 'ROYAL BUSHNESS'!
Nothing do you!

kanwulia you are just too funny .everything you say is always funny .have you considered going into the entertainment industry.you will make a good entertainer like an actress,on air personality,presenter etc.anyway back to the issue at hand


i feel op is very unbiased and factual.he said it as it really is.as much as i am against any form of violence,i believe constant provocation or long suppressed anger which has been fueled by some women talking anyhow causes some men to behave animalistic.its a 2 way thing really.except the man is just beating the woman for nothing without any precise,particular reason,then i will know he deserves to be bundled to yaba left for mental check up.


My 1 cent



kanwuuuullliiaaaa the funny babe

soul_glo: If you hit someone because of what they said to you then you are an uncivilized untamed animal. I don't care if you are a man or woman. That's just rubbish. What you said up there is the excuse that ALL abusers use. Do you really think that an abuser will not say "she made me do it?". The only time that physical force is necessary is to protect yourself from physical injury. She provoked him with her words? Is this Kindergarten or are we talking to adults here.

in as much as i am against violence,also bear in mind that some womens words are worse than physical assault.even the bible says,the tongue albeit the smallest part of the body but is capable of destroying a city or setting the soul on fire.what i am trying to say in essence is that,when some women talk to even their fellow women,it drives some people crazy,talkless of talking to their spouses like that.of course i understand that violence is an exhibition of lack of self control or lack of anger management but you know women have more vocal power than men,God gave men physical power and women vocal strength ans some words are worse than taking an instrument to harm a person.like when my mom wants to refer to anyone that is talking anyhow,she will say in yoruba (but translated to english)


you open your upper teeth and slam it on the lower teeth and you think you are making sense.so away from the diversion,what i am saying in essence is that we need to respect each others feelings,thoughts,emotions and psyche to avoid all this violence issues.honestly everyone has their share of the blame.the woman is as guilty as the man.you see an agry man seething and you are still insulting him with the burning anger instead of taking a walk and comming back when he is normal,of course depending on the kind of person he or she is,the anger will be diverted on you and he will pour out all his frustrations on you through violence

stillwater: Many men are going to have a second think coming in this generation. I tell ya!
Don't go and learn and treat your spouse like a human being like yourself, dey there dey call yourself as king, somebody go hear wen, I tell ya!
Any man who must say, "I am the king" is no true king. ... Tywin Lannister

Your wife would be the judge if you are a king or not.

true

Kanwulia:

Huhn! All these NL 'SEUN-ASSSHAWOS' aka AAAAAAAAAAAASHAWO EDINBURGH TO SEATTLE nor dey taya to open useless threads!
You think everyone is from Ogun/Lagos States or Abia/Anambra States where women still have or-ga-sms even while being roasted like SUYA for SALLAH huhu?

Make you dream on dear! Your prerogative
Na YOU go COMMIT SWEEECIDE for NL f0rst with ya own silliness. . . like your fellow LOW-SELF-ESTEEMED FATHERLY-SODOMIZED, LOVELESS WRETCHES OF NL!

Won't be surprised if you are one of those useless MUKINA2 or IKAMEFA pseudo-monikers with the characteristic 'tongue-in-cheek' silliness.
You sef go soon DIE troway like that your TWINNY abi na tripleTTY called 'IICE'!
Ewu!

Common move! Asssssssssssssssssssshawo 'DEBOSKY'!

kanwuuulliaaaaaa.chissoooooss o.you will not kee me with laugh

kulyie: in as much as i am against violence,also bear in mind that some womens words are worse than physical assault.even the bible says,the tongue albeit the smallest part of the body but is capable of destroying a city or setting the soul on fire.what i am trying to say in essence is that,when some women talk to even their fellow women,it drives some people crazy,talkless of talking to their spouses like that.of course i understand that violence is an exhibition of lack of self control or lack of anger management but you know women have more vocal power than men,God gave men physical power and women vocal strength ans some words are worse than taking an instrument to harm a person.like when my mom wants to refer to anyone that is talking anyhow,she will say in yoruba (but translated to english)


you open your upper teeth and slam it on the lower teeth and you think you are making sense.so away from the diversion,what i am saying in essence is that we need to respect each others feelings,thoughts,emotions and psyche to avoid all this violence issues.honestly everyone has their share of the blame.the woman is as guilty as the man.you see an agry man seething and you are still insulting him with the burning anger instead of taking a walk and comming back when he is normal,of course depending on the kind of person he or she is,the anger will be diverted on you and he will pour out all his frustrations on you through violence

Kuylie pleaaaaase there is no excuse. Would you walk up to a perfect stranger and slap them in the face because they said something rude to you? Most of these men will put up with it from another man or a woman who looks like she could physically take them. If someone is being verbally abusive you can walk away. YES. WALK AWAY. Everything else in my opinion is irrelevant. Assaulting someone because they talked to you in a way you felt was disrespectful makes you no better than an animal. Men are usually physically stronger than women. You can walk away from a tongue lashing. A man punching a woman in the face can lead to her dying and the man spending the rest of his like in prison. I can never justify anybody using physical assault on another person unless it is in self defense. I know you're not a man but even as a woman it is a good idea to plant that mindset in yourself and let it grow. If you let yourself accept that it is justifiable to use physical strength on someone who is being disrespectful to you then you will find it easier to assault people who are weaker than you. We always hear of men assaulting their wives but we hear horrible stories of women assaulting their children and domestic staff. It is the same exact mindset they have. The mindset that in some cases it is understandable to assault someone.

The funny thing is that such man will not slap a colleague who says worse things!

OP, I kind of shut down at where you said men and women are not equal.

Goodluck