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Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. - Phones - Nairaland

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Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by dadicvila(m): 9:04am On Nov 02, 2013
On behalf of myself, my future wife and
kidz, I congratulate every andriod user
who has successfully downloaded the
BBM application and is now enjoying its
unique features.
While it’s none of my business who
uses what and how they use it, I feel an
urge to give you a little bit of BBM
education (chill!,we all know it’s not
rocket science, but some seemingly
easy things are more difficult than
rocket science). Lemme stop preaching
at this juncture.
Here are some practical steps to
successfully guide you and help you
enjoy your BBM application:
1) You must first understand that BBM
is not 2go where you can just sit in your
house in Asaba and add somebody in
Zamfara. On BBM you add only friends,
family members and strangers you
know (I mean strangers who share a
common interest with you).
2) Please do not by any means lie about
your present location. Don’t tell people
you school in the UK but you are
currently in Nigeria because of the
annual ASUU festival because when you
claim to be back in the UK, somehow
some people will know you are a bloody
liar (please don’t ask me how).
3) Biko, don’t talk anyhow oo! Do not
threaten people. Babes, do not beg for
airtime from random guys because
they’ll screen-grab your chats and use it
as evidence against you (you will see it
on their DPs before you know it). Let me
give you a tip—If you must beg, then it
should be through a voice note.
4) Please go easy with the broadcast.
Not every information should be
broadcast. Some people on bbm send
broadcast about when they are eating,
sleeping and even when they are about
to have sex (I wonder what they expect
their contacts to do about it). The
broadcast function is for dissemination
of important and neccessary
information…Do not abuse it please.
5) We all pretend to be friends on BBM–
some of us are actually friends though,
and we remember and celebrate our
birthdays by using the celebrant’s
picture as DP for some hours
(preferably when he or she will notice
it). Be Warned–this seemingly
irrelevant practice means a lot to some
people and their memories are longer
than river nile so it will do you good to
take note of people who do use your
picture as their DP on your birthday so
you can reciprocate.
6) When you ping people and it shows
an X sign instead of the usual D sign, it
means the person is on leave, either
forced leave (no money to renew his/her
BIS subscription) or unforced leave (he/
she wants to allow his/her fingers rest
for a while) or better still, he/she wants
to avoid certain elements for a while. So
be guided..
7) Lest I forget, there are people we call
monitoring spirits on BBM. They don’t
change their display pictures or put up
new PMs, they are just like hawks in the
sky. They watch and monitor every
activity that goes down, they will never
ping you (sometimes you even doubt
their existence) but they are there. For
their sakes, please do not put up
personal and sensitive information on
your DP and PM. You can never tell what
they will do with it.
cool Well, it may interest you to know
that for some people, bbm is more of an
ego boosting app than a chat app so
don’t forget to put up those special
moments when you are in places like
Obudu cattle ranch, Sheraton hotel and
when you are shopping at shoprite. You
can also put pictures of whatever you
are currently eating or what someone
close to you is about eating. If you don’t
eat good food, you can download
pictures of food online. Just have
something to show off with, it’s allowed.
Let your contacts just feel your
existence. Even if you are not watching
a live match like some of my BBM
sisters, just steal stuff from twitter or
other people and update stuffs about
the game on your PM like you are
actually watching it…
9) It’s quite important to note that your
contacts are able to see what you are
currently listening to or watching at
every moment. For some of my spirit
filled brothers and sisters, please adjust
your settings before watching that
porn…make una warn una self oo!
10) Lastly, BBM is not an endorsement
for idleness or laziness. Some of us are
still using it because of the ease it
offers. Through it we are able to easily
communicate with our families,
business associates and close friends.
So incase you ping somebody and he/
she doesn’t respond immediately, he or
she might be very busy. The device
isn’t attached to any body part
afterall….A great deal of patience is
required to maintain your sanity as a
BB user, O sorry, I mean BBM user (they
now go together).
To my BB friends, please let’s take
heart. We know BB is no longer special
without that exclusive “M”, but how we
go do naaa? Let’s welcome our andriod
brothers and sisters with open arms.
Stop the discrimination.

I am on twitter @tammyDmilanista


www.ekekeee.com/dear-android-tecno-users-now-bbm/

7 Likes

Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nonso23(m): 9:15am On Nov 02, 2013
Tutorial on BBM 101! grin
Nice one O.p!
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nobody: 9:32am On Nov 02, 2013
i dy laugh o
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by constance500: 10:10am On Nov 02, 2013
BBM MADNESS.. Op u need cane...
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by dadicvila(m): 10:59am On Nov 02, 2013
constance500: BBM MADNESS.. Op u need cane...
WHY??
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by lilmax(m): 1:51pm On Nov 02, 2013
Lol....Dear andriod and tecno users
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Randerl: 1:56pm On Nov 02, 2013
Summary:

Don't Use BBM in Okada Man Style, But Like a Lady/Gentleman.
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nobody: 2:21pm On Nov 02, 2013
Thank u my broda... smiley
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nobody: 2:37pm On Nov 02, 2013
Randerl: Summary:

Don't Use BBM in Okada Man Style, But Like a Lady/Gentleman.

Guy your summary dry ooo...!
My man have said everytin we need to know abi d bbm stuff dey pain u! shocked
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nobody: 2:57pm On Nov 02, 2013
Nonso23: Tutorial on BBM 101! grin
Nice one O.p!
seconded very useful tips
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by garbigarba(m): 3:46pm On Nov 02, 2013
Front Page Material
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by mrvocalprowess(m): 4:24pm On Nov 02, 2013
Lol!!! Every bbm user can relate 2 all wat u said!especially those dat dnt update dp's or pm!!! Monitoring spirit!haha!n I find it really disrespectful wen pple dnt change dier settings wen watching indencency!!! BBM anytime !anyday!
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Warlord3000(m): 4:51pm On Nov 02, 2013
I left some bbm monitoring spirit behind when I left BB for android...

I hope some of them no follow me come android to monitor again oo
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by AngelEbi(f): 4:51pm On Nov 02, 2013
Let me add my own advice....



1. Steal DPs with style: Go ahead n steal DPs, its allowed bt its very tacky to use dem almost immediately. Wait @ least a week or two.
2. Its nt compulsory to reply BCs: u might think its a point of duty to reply BCs, maybe wit d annoyin 'k' or some other useless tidbit. Well, its nt. Most BCs are just for info or laughs.


I'll add more wen I remember.....
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Teejay4kell(m): 5:08pm On Nov 02, 2013
trash. i rep team Tecno.
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Teejay4kell(m): 5:10pm On Nov 02, 2013
Lagusta:

And Who told this one that I am still an undergraduate

please check my profile, and I attended the only school that doesn't go on strike... figure that. Out yourself!!!!
yu get mout. lyk you yu jor.
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by caukerzee(m): 5:51pm On Nov 02, 2013
I see you still speak from a BB user point of view. That feature of showing every tom, dick and harry what song or video you're playing is only available on blackberry phones.

Again, why did you direct these rules to android users alone? What about iOS? Are you by any way trying to imply that android users are th uncivilized ones?

I see no need for all these as anyone with comon sense should already know them

P.S: the times when BBM was seen as a status symbol have long passed and been forgotten. Whether you want to agree or not, BBM is just like every other chat app out there. There are many more even better. Its just more popular. Deal with it.

1 Like

Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by arizon101(m): 7:06pm On Nov 02, 2013
Omo see craze, u wan show us u don download bbm abi undecided
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by Nobody: 7:14pm On Nov 02, 2013
have never seen such gently constructed THRASH

angry
Re: Dear Android And Tecno Users, Now That You Are On BBM…. by flawless911(m): 7:43pm On Nov 02, 2013
BBM.. Just another chat app on my TECNO

I hardly open dat shiit anywa

#TeamWhatsapp

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