Dear Perfect-Man Hunter,
Oh you’re looking for the perfect
man?Tall but not too tall
that he looks awkward,
dark but not too dark
that he can be called a
blackie…no wait light-skinned but
not too light, handsome enough that all
the ladies would notice when you walk
into the room on his arm, yet on your
leash and loyal and strong enough to
withstand such temptations.
You want a man who makes at least
$80,000 a year, is a hustler and will
provide you with everything you’ve ever
dreamed off. At the same time, you
want him to be at your beck and call and
spend quality time with you.He has
to have a degree, have
his own place and drive
a luxury car. You want a
“business-man world
traveller” but he can’t
travel so much that you
start to feel lonely. A
man who loves you
unconditionally but not
overwhelmingly, is
sweet but not soo sweet
that he appears soft.You
want a man who cooks and cleans. One
who is confident but not arrogant. One
who is smart but not too much of a nerd.
You want one from a good family. You
want him slim but not too skinny,
“healthy” but not too fat, muscular but
responsible-looking . You want one
without children or any baby-mama
drama. You want one with a pointed nose
that fits his face just right. One who
opens the door for you at all times. You
want a man who puts the toilet seat
down, and knows to wipe the sink when
he’s done brushing his teeth. Oh no,
there can’t be any toothpaste stains in
the sink or boxers on the floor. You
want a man who’ll support you in every
way while you sit at home and file your
nails. Oh, there has to be a man who is
self-confident but who’ll listen to all
your instructions. You want a gentleman
who’s slow to anger but not one who
ignores you when you throw tantrums.You claim you are
traditional and you want
a man who exclusively
provides for the family
but you don’t submit to
him.He must be “traditional”, yet
you get to flip out on him whenever you
want. Or is it that you want to be a
fully-fledged career woman, solely
making life decisions, yet he still has to
maintain “control”. You want a man who’ll
watch you be angry, yell and shove him
and do nothing but at the same time,
you don’t want a pushover for a man. You
want him to be muscular and strong. He
has to be strong-willed and just
dangerous enough to keep you on your
toes. You want him to understand your
every emotion but not too much so that
his love for you makes you want to
gag.He has to tell you he
loves you everyday but
not too much that it
starts to irritate you.
He has to be “good”
bad-boy, right?I hate to break it to you oh perfect
man hunter…there is no such
thing as a perfect
man.You can’t have it all. If this
letter hit home for you, please look in
the mirror and ask yourself how
perfect you are. There’s nothing wrong
with wanting a good man who loves you
unconditionally and who can support you
and the family you make with him. In
fact, its what you should look for.
However, for every awesome
characteristic a human being has, there
is a flaw. Your duty is to prioritize and
decide what you can or cannot handle/
tolerate in a man.In essence,
stop looking for the
perfect man and start
looking for the perfect
man for you.For example, if you are looking for a
drop-dead gorgeous Idris-Elba look
alike, you have to be emotionally strong
enough to handle the attention he’ll get
from other women. Same thing goes for
marrying a celebrity of any kind. If you
are looking for a man who is very in
touch with his emotions, you can’t be
with a “bad boy”…but then the ones who
are soo caring and loving aren’t
‘dangerous’ or challenging enough for you
to appreciate.
Also, you can’t claim to be a modern-day
woman and expect your husband to be
stuck in the 70s. What do I mean? Take
for example, the girl who works full
time but expects her husband to pay all
the bills AND take her every word as A
and Amen.I hate to break it
to you but you can’t
want a traditional man
to the T and then try to
control him.Choose an era both
of you agree to fix your marriage in or
better yet, create your own. After all,
back in the day when men paid all the
bills, women didn’t work AND they were
submissive. Ask your grandmother if
she ever flipped or walked out on your
grandfather. That should answer your
question.
I could go on and on but my point is this-
You can’t have it all…When you find a good
man with the
“important” qualities
that make a good
relationship/marriage,
hold on to him. He can’t
be perfect, because
neither are you.
Stay Inspired…