There is this case of a woman I know in my hood, a Muslimah and she got married to a Christian, an igbo man, for that matter. I don't know her reasons for marrying him, but today the man is now a Muslim and the wife now uses a jilbab.
The above is in no way meant to encourage this kind of marriage, in fact, aside Islam does not approve of it, I strongly dislike it.
A better approach which I believe is also dicey, is that if a non Muslim proposes marriage to a Muslimah, then the condition must be acceptance of Islam wholeheartedly. But how can one know of the sincerity of such a man?

And nice to have you back deols

Sissie:

Oya tender your CV

Are u seriously asking for CV? You should already be ble to tell now. He said he is pretty.. :-D

sino: There is this case of a woman I know in my hood, a Muslimah and she got married to a Christian, an igbo man, for that matter. I don't know her reasons for marrying him, but today the man is now a Muslim and the wife now uses a jilbab.
The above is in no way meant to encourage this kind of marriage, in fact, aside Islam does not approve of it, I strongly dislike it.
A better approach which I believe is also dicey, is that if a non Muslim proposes marriage to a Muslimah, then the condition must be acceptance of Islam wholeheartedly. But how can one know of the sincerity of such a man?

And nice to have you back deols

I have heard similar stories as well but I would say, it is the other way round most times.

sino: There is this case of a woman I know in my hood, a Muslimah and she got married to a Christian, an igbo man, for that matter. I don't know her reasons for marrying him, but today the man is now a Muslim and the wife now uses a jilbab.
The above is in no way meant to encourage this kind of marriage, in fact, aside Islam does not approve of it, I strongly dislike it.
A better approach which I believe is also dicey, is that if a non Muslim proposes marriage to a Muslimah, then the condition must be acceptance of Islam wholeheartedly. But how can one know of the sincerity of such a man?

And nice to have you back deols

Thanks.

That is like the case we read of at the Family Section.

But do you really blame some of these ladies? Pressure to be married and unsuitable Muslim suitors are some of the things I have heard of o. Maybe the Muslim men they meet dont meet their criteria and the others do.

I want to open a thread on gender issues and Islam. I have had to change my mind on them because they appear to be criticising some aspects of Islam. But some of those things genuinely bother me and I av been far away from Islamic studies for quite a while

What do u guys think of this??

tbaba1234:

I have heard similar stories as well but I would say, it is the other way round most times.

Indeed, the case I mentioned is the exception to what is generally observed in such marriages.

deols:

Thanks.

That is like the case we read of at the Family Section.

But do you really blame some of these ladies? Pressure to be married and unsuitable Muslim suitors are some of the things I have heard of o. Maybe the Muslim men they meet dont meet their criteria and the others do.

To me, the only excuse worth considering is ignorance, anything else is self desire.

deols: I want to open a thread on gender issues and Islam. I have had to change my mind on them because they appear to be criticising some aspects of Islam. But some of those things genuinely bother me and I av been far away from Islamic studies for quite a while

What do u guys think of this??

If you want to have talk about them privately send me a mail in sha Allah.

.....

i remember when after Deol "disappeared" and someone opens a thread titled "Deol is gone". One of the readers asked "to where or what do you mean?" another reader responded "She is dead". Remember the thread, anyone?

Not sure if the thread still here. But i remember someone said the above and everyone laughed. Looks like the person didn't understand what Op meant by Deol is gone. I was silently following the thread. I laughed in Spanish. Anyways, how's Ramadan going?.

Remember to extend your dua for Gaza, oppressed Muslims everywhere and recent crossfire innocent victims of political gibberish over Ukraine. They are shuhadah inshallah

deols: I want to open a thread on gender issues and Islam. I have had to change my mind on them because they appear to be criticising some aspects of Islam. But some of those things genuinely bother me and I av been far away from Islamic studies for quite a while

What do u guys think of this??

open and ask lets discuss.

we could discuss some of NL.

....

ueskman:


we live in a complicated world..I have seen:
couple-husband(xtain), wife(Muslim) , now d husband is a damn dedicated Muslim to d core(even stronger that his wife)


couple-husband(xtain), wife(Muslim) , now d wife s a dedicated xtain(Buh still maintain her Muslim name )

couple-husband(Muslim), wife(xtain) , now d wife is a dedicated Muslim(far stronger than his husband)

couple-husband(Muslim), wife(xtain), they both maintain their religion , Buh their sons and daughters(grown ups) r damn dedicated Muslims



So, just pray for Allaah's intervention


Goodluck in your decision sister.


wasalamulayi alaikum waramotullah wabarakatuhu roomies

. To prevent all dis complications marry a God fearin muslim sister nd ur children mayb muslims insha Allah.

ussy09: . To prevent all dis complications marry a God fearin muslim sister nd ur children mayb muslims insha Allah.

How do you know a God fearing Muslim sister? By the way she dress I suppose...... People make mistakes by applying one method in searching for future partner.
When I met my husband, he was a Christian, I will visit him and observe my solat in his house. All I love about him then was the fact that we work as a term. We built our career together. I always share some Islamic law about so many things and he would say, I think Islam should be refer to as a way of life. He converted to Islam himself without discussing with him. We dated 8 years before getting married.

Tbaby4real:
How do you know a God fearing Muslim sister? By the way she dress I suppose...... People make mistakes by applying one method in searching for future partner.
When I met my husband, he was a Christian, I will visit him and observe my solat in his house. All I love about him then was the fact that we work as a term. We built our career together. I always share some Islamic law about so many things and he would say, I think Islam should be refer to as a way of life. He converted to Islam himself without discussing with him. We dated 8 years before getting married.

Alhamdulilah everything worked out ok but there are bad stories as well.

Dating as you have described is not permissible islamically first of all.

Imagine, you were not so practising or firm, it will be you moving the other way. It is more common for women to adopt their husband's faith.

tbaba1234:

Alhamdulilah everything worked out ok but there are bad stories as well.

Dating as you have described is not permissible islamically first of all.

Imagine, you were not so practising or firm, it will be you moving the other way. It is more common for women to adopt their husband's faith.

I believe you mean dating is not permissible Islamically because of uncontrolled libido. Tbaba, career oriented people don't listen to their libido drive, they are busy up there. I thought we are not permitted to have sex before marriage but not having a relationship. Could you give link in that respect please?

Tbaby4real:

I believe you mean dating is not permissible Islamically because of uncontrolled libido. Tbaba, career oriented people don't listen to their libido drive, they are busy up there. I thought we are not permitted to have sex before marriage but not having a relationship. Could you give link in that respect please?

Dating is not permitted regardless of whether intercourse is involved.

You are either married or you are not.

There is a focused period of interaction (courtship??) for those who intend to get married where they can get to know each other and what they want from marriage with the knowledge of the girl's guardian and both families.

Even then, they are still both non mahrams and must maintain limits until they agree on marriage.

Boyfriend- Girlfriend is not permissible.

Link:
http://islamqa.info/en/13747

tbaba1234:

Dating is not permitted regardless of whether intercourse is involved.

You are either married or you are not.

There is a focused period of interaction (courtship??) for those who intend to get married where they can get to know each other and what they want from marriage with the knowledge of the girl's guardian and both families.

Even then, they are still both non mahrams and must maintain limits until they agree on marriage.

Boyfriend- Girlfriend is not permissible.

Link:
http://islamqa.info/en/13747

Okay....l

Sissie:

open and ask lets discuss.

we could discuss some of NL.

The link.
https://www.nairaland.com/1820346/gender-family-issues-islam

Mar'haba.

deols:

The link.
https://www.nairaland.com/1820346/gender-family-issues-islam

Tbaby4real:
How do you know a God fearing Muslim sister? By the way she dress I suppose...... People make mistakes by applying one method in searching for future partner.
When I met my husband, he was a Christian, I will visit him and observe my solat in his house. All I love about him then was the fact that we work as a term. We built our career together. I always share some Islamic law about so many things and he would say, I think Islam should be refer to as a way of life. He converted to Islam himself without discussing with him. We dated 8 years before getting married.

. Wow am hapi 4u bt pls dnt use dis ur experience in encouraging muslim sisters in marryin d christians ones cos I believ u knw d implication more so knw dis "same sun dat melt d ice harden d clay"

PENMIGHT: Mar'haba.

Thanks. Pls contribute to this thread.

https://www.nairaland.com/1820346/gender-family-issues-islam

ussy09: . Wow am hapi 4u bt pls dnt use dis ur experience in encouraging muslim sisters in marryin d christians ones cos I believ u knw d implication more so knw dis "same sun dat melt d ice harden d clay"

I agree but it would be so bad to be applying one method for something that is as serious as future partner....... May Allah help all our single brothers and sisters in their search of the right person. No one is perfect in making such tough decision except for the grace of almighty Allah( swt). Also, the most important is not before but after the wedding. How the two are able to help each other in improving their Ibadah with their tight schedule and busy day. Alhamdulillah, for whom almighty Allah(swt) choose for me. I will forever be grateful to Him.

ameenahz:


An invalid marriage is tantamount to adultery.

http://islamqa.info/en/8396

What makes the marriage invalid?

Fulaman198:

What makes the marriage invalid?

A muslim woman is not permitted to marry a non muslim, be it christian or jew or pagan. Express prohibition of such by Allah makes such union invalid.

{Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters), until they believe: A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though she allures you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the Fire. But Allah beckons by His Grace to the Garden (of bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His Signs clear to mankind: That they may celebrate His praise.} (Al-Baqara, 2:221)


check: http://www.onislam.net/english/ask-about-islam/society-and-family/interfaith-issues/461537-can-a-muslim-women-marry-a-non-muslim-man.html

ameenahz:

A muslim woman is not permitted to marry a non muslim, be it christian or jew or pagan. Express prohibition of such by Allah makes such union invalid.

{Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters), until they believe: A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though she allures you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the Fire. But Allah beckons by His Grace to the Garden (of bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His Signs clear to mankind: That they may celebrate His praise.} (Al-Baqara, 2:221)


check: http://www.onislam.net/english/ask-about-islam/society-and-family/interfaith-issues/461537-can-a-muslim-women-marry-a-non-muslim-man.html

I think the beauty of freedom is that God/Allah/Geno/whatever you want to call the almighty gave us all the power of choice. I don't believe it is wrong to marry someone of a different religious background from you.

Humans are meant to come together not be segregated through religion, skin colour, ethnic group, and all that other nonsense. I know that some people are probably saying I sound hypocritical right now because I mainly only talk to African sisters and no other continent. That is what I call preference.

Fulaman198:

I think the beauty of freedom is that God/Allah/Geno/whatever you want to call the almighty gave us all the power of choice. I don't believe it is wrong to marry someone of a different religious background from you.

Humans are meant to come together not be segregated through religion, skin colour, ethnic group, and all that other nonsense. I know that some people are probably saying I sound hypocritical right now because I mainly only talk to African sisters and no other continent. That is what I call preference.

Ermm....sorry bro, are you a muslim? Just asking.

ameenahz:

Ermm....sorry bro, are you a muslim? Just asking.

Yes

Fulaman198:

Yes

Alhamdulillah.

Then maybe you would understand the wisdom behind such a commandment.

Read this: O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allâh, but do that which they are commanded. (suratul tahrim vs 6)

This is an obligation for us all. A primary assignment. And one of the ways we can achieve this is to choose righteous, believing spouses in the first place. Although Allah guides who he wills and anything can happen, you'll agree with me that the probablility of raising your kids as muslims is higher if you and your spouse both practise Islam.

For me as a person, i owe humanity, my country, my tribe, my clan, my family and so on my allegiance but my first identity is islam. I am a muslim first and the others next. And i believe that is the way it should be for all muslims. The questions in the grave will not start with 'What did you do to keep Nigeria united?' but 'who is your Lord?' (that does not mean the former is not important. It means there are even more important responsibilities). So yes, keeping humanity together is important (infact, i think i have read it somewhere that it is not permissible to reject a good muslim suitor on the basis of tribe and all that. If i had gotten an Asian Muslim as a suitor when i was searching, i would have gone ahead to marry him, in shaa Allah) but keeping the community of Islam growing and together is much more important.
Don't forget that in most parts of the world, women are expected to follow the religion of their husbands and the kids are raised to practise the religion of their fathers.

Fulaman198:

Yes

You are Muslim but how much of your views are shaped by Islam.

Muslim means one who submits to the will of God.

This means that for a muslim, even his choices are guided by Islam. You have the choice to drink alcohol but for the Muslim, that option is out of the table.

The same goes for every instruction in the book.

Fulaman198:

I think the beauty of freedom is that God/Allah/Geno/whatever you want to call the almighty gave us all the power of choice. I don't believe it is wrong to marry someone of a different religious background from you.

Humans are meant to come together not be segregated through religion, skin colour, ethnic group, and all that other nonsense. I know that some people are probably saying I sound hypocritical right now because I mainly only talk to African sisters and no other continent. That is what I call preference.

.

ameenahz:

Alhamdulillah.

Then maybe you would understand the wisdom behind such a commandment.

Read this: O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allâh, but do that which they are commanded. (suratul tahrim vs 6)

This is an obligation for us all. A primary assignment. And one of the ways we can achieve this is to choose righteous, believing spouses in the first place. Although Allah guides who he wills and anything can happen, you'll agree with me that the probablility of raising your kids as muslims is higher if you and your spouse both practise Islam.

For me as a person, i owe humanity, my country, my tribe, my clan, my family and so on my allegiance but my first identity is islam. I am a muslim first and the others next. And i believe that is the way it should be for all muslims. The questions in the grave will not start with 'What did you do to keep Nigeria united?' but 'who is your Lord?' (that does not mean the former is not important. It means there are even more important responsibilities). So yes, keeping humanity together is important (infact, i think i have read it somewhere that it is not permissible to reject a good muslim suitor on the basis of tribe and all that. If i had gotten an Asian Muslim as a suitor when i was searching, i would have gone ahead to marry him, in shaa Allah) but keeping the community of Islam growing and together is much more important.
Don't forget that in most parts of the world, women are expected to follow the religion of their husbands and the kids are raised to practise the religion of their fathers.

While I do admire your piousness, I think being a Muslim goes beyond that. Islam is a religion of peace and everyone practises it differently.

If someone chooses to marry someone outside of their respective religion whether it be man or woman, they are doing it because they feel that is their hearts desire. They are following their hearts, nothing more or less.

Religion is a very touchy subject, even right now I'm holding back a lot of my beliefs as to not offend anyone. But for me I wouldn't mind marrying someone who comes from a different belief system from me. Love conquers all. We live in a progressive society now and I feel that whatever people do, it's their own business really.

Agnostic, Buddhist, Hindu, Christian, Baha'i, Jewish, Traditional African religion, Islam, Shinto, etc they are all religions and ways of life, however, we are all human beings no matter what walk of life or background we come from.

If we learn to accept one another even in marriage there will be less problems in this world.