title: I AM THE GREATEST

Akpos and Ugo were in a supermarket together and while they were shopping, Ugo stole 3 bars of chocolate.
When they got outside, he showed Akpos and told him, "I am the greatest

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/i-am-greatest.html

Police officers were at a road block. One of them stops a trailer:
POLICEMAN: Where is your permit?
DRIVER: (Hands in his permit)
POLICEMAN: Do you have an extinguisher?
DRIVER: Yes, its there…
POLICEMAN: Light up your indicators.
DRIVER: (Light his indicators)
POLICEMAN: Do you have a seat belt?
DRIVER: Yes, I have.
POLICEMAN: Hunk your horn let me hear.
The driver hunks his horn. The policeman turns to his fellow officers and says the man has everything and they decided to let him go.
As the driver was about to drive away, one of the police officers suddenly shouts:
POLICEMAN: Is your SIM-card registered?
DRIVER: (Completely surprised) No.
POLICEMAN: Park! Park there!!! How can you drive without registering your number? What if you are involve in an accident, how will we identify you?
1 word for Naija Police.

http://sholaqozeem..com

WHO ELSE IF NOT THE PRANK MASTER?! ENGLISH CLASS Teacher: What is a Verb?
Akpos: A Verb is a valve found in bicycle tyre.
Teacher: What are you saying?
Akpos: It is a complete sentence sir.
Teacher: Are you mad?
Akpos: It is a question sir. Teacher: Don't be stupid.
Akpos: It is an advice sir.
Teacher: Stop that nonsense.
Akpos: It is a command sir.
Teacher: You're an idiot.
Akpos: It is an insult sir. Teacher: Get out of my class.
Akpos: It is an order sir.
Teacher: Oh! Goodness, What a boy!
Akpos: It is an exclamation sir.
Teacher: May God have mercy on you.
Akpos: It is a prayer sir

Funny joke
_______________
On a windy day, an old lady is standing on a street corner, holding on to her hat with both hands, even though her dress is flying up over her face. An old man across the street sees her and runs over. As he approaches her, he says, "Sister, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, standing
Read more here:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-joke.html

The metal box
............................
A young man and woman got married. At the time of their marriage, the husband noticed his wife carried a decently sized metal box and shoved it up at the top of their closet. Curious as he was, the wife told him to never to look in it no matter what the circumstances. Over the years, he saw that metal box in the closet, but never peered into it for the sake of his wife. One day, though, the wife had a stroke and was rushed to the hospital. As the husband sat grieving at home, he thought of the box, snatched it up, and sped to the hospital where his wife remained with her death coming soon
Read more here:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/the-metal-box.html

Title: The overweight guy

There is an overweight guy who is watching TV. A commercial comes on for a guaranteed weight loss of 10 pounds in a week. So the guy, thinking what the hell, signs up for it. Next morning a
Read more here: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/overweight-guy.html

TITLE: CLOCK IN THE HEAVEN

So a man dies, goes to Heaven, and sees St. Peter. There are many clocks surrounding him so the man asks, "What are these clocks for?" St. Peter replies,
READ MORE HERE: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/clock-in-heaven.html

Funny School joke
After picking her son up from school one day, the mother asks him what he did at school. The kid replies, "I had sex with my teacher." She gets so mad that when they get home, she orders him to go straight to his room
READ MORE:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-school-joke.html

The Lack of Appreciation

A girl was very proud of her boy friend, she always tell her friends how good her boy friend is. On the day of her birthday, she invited all her friends including her boy friend who happends to be the
Read more|http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/the-lack-of-appreciation.html

Man vs women
A man and his wife were arguing about the superiority of men and women. These are the arguments they presented
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/entertainment-man-vs-women.html

Akpos with its trick

A rich man's son who was classmate to Akpors told him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret & that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." So Akpors decided to go home & try it out. He got home & as he is greeted by his mother he said, "Mama, I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him N500 & said, "Just dont tell your father. "Quite pleased, he waited for his father to get home from work & on arrival his greeting to His father was "Papa, I know the whole truth" His father quickly
Read more here http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/akpos-with-its-trick.html

Akpos the best Teacher

Teacher Akpos English Class teacher, one Monday morning, Mr. Tinko, an inspector from the Ministry
of Education paid a surprise visit to Teacher Akpos English class and engaged the students. Mr Tinko: Show me what Mr Akpos has taught you so far this year. Let's do some comparison. So If i say small, you say small, smaller, smallest.. The students nodded
Read more here very funny http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/akpos-best-teacher.html

Akpos with wallet

Akpos was roaming about the Lagos international airport. He saw a wallet on the road he picked

Read more here so funny http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/akpos-with-wallet.html

Suprise Visit

A Girl Returns Home After 30 Years.
<p>AKPOS The Father (angry): "Where the hell have you been all these years"
<p>Girl: "I was working as a Prostitute in the Vietnham

Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/suprise-visit.html

When a conductor gets a promotion, he becomes DRIVER, when a teacher gets a promotion, he becomes HEADTEACHER, when a house girl gets a promotion, she becomes---------?? I am asking because i want to promote my house girl.. I don't no the position to give her.. Help me please.

Akpos came home from work last night and said to his wife "I have been given a huge promotion at work which

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/akpos-and-his-wife.html

BANK ROBBERS
============
Two thieves break into a bank in the middle of the night and open a safe. There is only some yogurt, but no money. They taste the yogurt. It's tainted.
The men open the next safe

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/bank-robbers.html

Mental patients

Two mental patients were walking next to a swimming pool. One jumped into the pool and the other jumped in to save him. Their doctor saw the rescue and called the rescuer to his office. "Due to your actions, it appears your mental state is fine," the doctor said to

Read more:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/mental-patients.html

Santa claus

A woman had never seen Santa Claus before, but on Christmas Eve night she heard someone come down her chimney so she went downstairs to check it out. ''Oh, it's Santa Claus," she said, "Please stay and chat this is the first

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/santa-claus.html

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son
Read more so funny http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-joke_18.html

Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into

Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/happy-birthday.html

Relaxing joke

Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/relaxing-joke.html

Yo momma

Yo momma is so fat that when she went to

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/yo-momma.html

Yo momma

Yo momma's so fat and old when God said

Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/yo-momma_18.html

Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears
http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/yo-momma_19.html

Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs,

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/yo-momma_42.html

The Lecturer said, "let's begin by reviewing some Nigerian history." The Lecturer asked who said, "I shall return to die in the land of my fathers?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Akpos, who had his hand up. Akpos replied: "King Jaja of Opobo, 1875" "very good!" said lecturer.
Then she asked again, who said, "The land use act will feed the nation?" Again, no response except from Akpos
h: "Obasanjo, 1976."
The Lecturer snapped at the class; "class, you should be ashamed. Akpos, who is new to our Country, knows more about our history than you do."
The Lecturer heard a loud whisper: "Ghana must go". "who said that?" she demanded, Akpos put his hand up, "Buhari 1984."
At that point, a student at the back scornfully said; "Hmmm, you think you are smart?" The Lecturer glared and asked; "All right! Now,
who said that?" Again, Akpos
said,"Babangidato Abiola, 1992."
Hmmm, a Student at the back smilled " I dey laugh ooh" Akpos smilled back and said Obasanjo to Atiku 2001.
Now furious, another student yelled; "Oh yeah! Eat this!" Akpos jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to the Lecturer, "Indian mistress giving an apple to

Read more : http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/akpos-with-lectural.html

Title: Petrol Station
================

This morning akpos, the brother to Hon Patrick
drove into a petrol station in his sleek, state of the art range rover sports

Read more so funny: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/petrol-station.html

TITLE: DO YOU NO WHO I AM

A man drove past a military road block and the officers asked him to pull over. The man started shouting at them, "Do you know who I am? Ehn! Do you know..." One officer interrupted, "Hey, you see those blocks at the other side of the road? They are 200. You are going to bring them here."
After they've beaten him, they made him carry the
Read more:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/do-you-no-who-i-am.html

Title: LETTER WRITTING


A little boy wanted 10,000naira badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happen.
Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the 10,000naira. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God

Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/letter-writting.html

Title: The eye problem

Akpos stole a goat, he was arrested and taken to court. The Judge: Gentleman are you guilty or not guilty?? Akpor: My lord, i'm not guilty. Judge: how come you were arrested and brought before the court for stealing a goat?? Akpor: my lord i was just
Read more:http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/joke-eye-problem.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH26boHgfQw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPdbdjctx2I