[quote author=onuwaje post=28316343][/quote]real_matters

chimkaire:
True but we gotta tell we women the sad truth even if harsh, gotta be. We got each other's back, though . How is yhu doing, btw ?

IFAhear...
Most just wanna do 'holy pass' for her matter. Even the woman that did hers after 2wks will join to abuse her.

Me gud btw, you?

stinggy:


IFAhear...
Most just wanna do 'holy pass' for her matter. Even the woman that did hers after 2wks will join to abuse her.

Me gud btw, you?

seriously? You believe? Only a woman who pleases to displease herself would do that, arakunrin Biko, this is so "NSFW" . Hian! . I'm fine, thank you

Daresh:


If you like sleep with your wife the day she comes from hospital, e no concern me.

lol i cant stop laughin..

chimkaire:
seriously? You believe? Only a woman who pleases to displease herself would do that, arakunrin Biko, this is so "NSFW" . Hian! . I'm fine, thank you

K na, I hear u.. tho dtz not my point.

Why ?

Bibol:
Like someone typed earlier, the man should get busy. A few weeks of abstinence won't kill an healthy relationship. By the way, there are other options that can be explored while she heals. The doctors that give advice to abstain from sex for 6-8 weeks aren't fools.

they re not fools but mens libido i s high...

chimkaire:
True but we gotta tell we women the sad truth even if harsh, gotta be. We got each other's back, though . How is yhu doing, btw ?

....girl hmmm...

Lol....very funny

Virgindove:
It varies, some women with relatively easy delivery resume duty very early. I allowed him just two weeks after, and it was an interesting experience.

yu re so on point here..
Cos i knew it depend on easy delivery or on individuals

tobymichael:
Lol....very funny

lol wat s funny..nutin is new

What a nice question, I believe that men that practice abstainance before marriage won't have issues with this, BJ is not good, self-service is not Good too. If you are having the urge and your wife is not ready, you can at least romance her.....lolz while she romances you back....... That one can serve for a day sha........lolz

emmysoftyou:
....girl hmmm...

Yhu no jasi, pelee, aburo

rallymento:
What a nice question, I believe that men that practice abstainance before marriage won't have issues with this, BJ is not good, self-service is not Good too. If you are having the urge and your wife is not ready, you can at least romance her.....lolz while she romances you back....... That one can serve for a day sha........lolz

any reactions..in absent of no reaction,that is,he is right....

freeboy604:


Madam don't mind them you did well , let them wait it will get to their turn one day. You know people are so secretive that even when they eat refuse they come out to tell the whole world that they have not eaten local delicacy since they where born.

Seconded... hypocrisy at work.

babyosisi:


Please leave the woman alone jor.
Can't you hold yourself till after the post natal visit which typically is 6-8 weeks after childbirth
The doctor has to say it is Ok for her to resume duties please and it has to be OK with her too,she knows her own body
Pick your bible and read,join the men's group at Church,join the gym,go and learn bakery,keep yourself busy and help take care of the new baby instead of occupying your mind with SE.x

best advice.

Daresh:


If you like sleep with your wife the day she comes from hospital, e no concern me.

exactly, the way u responded to the woman, like a hyena on heat was too nosy.

fr3do:


exactly, the way u respond to the woman, like a hyena on heat was too nosy.

lol

See them ooo
It is my body not yours. Thanks for the advice sha

emmysoftyou:
lol wat s funny..nutin is new

The way she said it..u no get mouth

Virgindove:
It varies, some women with relatively easy delivery resume duty very early. I allowed him just two weeks after, and it was an interesting experience.

Honestly!!!!??
This is wrong by all ramification personally ......honestly!!!! Couples shouldn't even have a say on this issue if this is how they go about it, any thing less than six weeks is incorrigible, irresponsible and...and ....oh God. I mean the risk is high please....puerperal sepsis, postpartum haemorrhage are the major complications. The bruises on the uterus and vaginaaa are yet to healed ..which can trap microbes and even cause reactionary bleeding etc. Then comes the exposed nerve endings that causes pain or unpleasant sensation on walking or urination etc. Most women won't even allow you to examine them during postpartum visit at 6 weeks because they still feel sensitive down there. What about the lochia...the drains from the vaginaaa after birth that last up to 28 days or more, full of debris and all Whatnots... jeezzzzz.

Men please zip the fuccck up until your wife heals, the risk is greater than the enjoyment therein. Any man that has to be kept by all possible means including this is............yawn!!!!! Damn!!!!

It takes at least six weeks for things to go back to normal, if there is no associated problems postpartum.

when you advise women they will conclude you want to break their home.rubbish keep giving yourselves infection....-ignoramus

alutacontinua:


You have got to be kidding me
The things naija women do in the name of keeping a man
Hian!

I am laughing hard today!

Couldn't the husband wait till the woman was healed? 6weeks? Does it mean he cannot wait for 2months if his wife travelled or he travelled himself?

Things we do for 'loff'

dosht:
See them ooo
It is my body not yours. Thanks for the advice sha

yu have not answer my question ma..
or u want us to forget it..?

Someone's been busted.LOL

emmysoftyou:
i thought yu re a single mother
re yu now married

Hahaha,bia u no understand say she dey dodge u?

emmysoftyou:
yu have not answer my question ma..
or u want us to forget it..?

HAHAHAHA...choiiii

babyosisi:


Did you hear this info from a native doctor or herbalist ?

S.ex after giving birth

Written by Dr David Delvin (GP and family planning specialist), Christine Webber (psychotherapist and lifecoach)

Will childbirth affect your s.ex life?

Yes, it certainly will! So please don't expect that everything will instantly return to normal.

Men are particularly likely to believe this. A lot of young blokes think that they'll be able to have I.ntercourse as soon as their partner gets home from hospital. But this just isn't true.

You see, childbirth is a pretty traumatic process for a woman. Having a baby pass through her va.gina is almost like having a small explosion go off inside her.

The delicate vagi.nal tissues are inevitably strained, bruised and torn – and it takes some weeks for these injuries to heal up.

Furthermore, childbirth involves considerable hormone changes – as well as emotional stresses. And as a consequence, very, very few women feel rampagingly se.xy until a long time after they have given birth.

Therefore, it's important for both mother and father to realise that lovemaking may not go brilliantly in the first six months or so after the baby arrives. So be prepared – and be patient!

How soon can you resume having s.ex?
In 2013, a study published in the British Journal of Obstetrics & Gynaecology stated that 41 per cent of first-time mothers had had full vagi.nal s.ex by the time the baby was six weeks old.

Traditionally, midwives and doctors have advised that a woman shouldn't consider having inte.rcourse until after her postnatal check-up. This examination usually takes place about six weeks after the birth.

However, in recent years several American medical publications have pointed out that there is no real scientific basis for this 'prohibition' until six weeks.

And some mothers have recently stated in internet communications that they felt pretty s.exy within two or three weeks of childbirth and wanted to resume. Some say that they have done so, without any ill-effects.

Others are not so sure, particularly if they are still exhausted after giving birth. For the moment, medical advice remains that the average woman should postpone in.tercourse till after that six week check-up.

Even then, she may not feel ready to 'go all the way' – particularly if she has had stitches and the opening of her va.gina is sore.

If you're in any doubt about whether to resume s.ex, ask the doctor who does your postnatal examination for advice – particularly about using additional lubrication.

Can you go in for any other se.xual activity before resuming intercourse?
Yes – and it can be a good way of 'letting off steam'. Couples do often get very frustrated when they're waiting to resume s.exual interc.ourse. This applies particularly to men!

So, in the meantime, you can go in for fore.play – though there is one very serious danger here, which we'll explain in a moment.

Can both of you go as far as the point of cli.max?
Definitely! It will do the postnatal woman no harm at all to have orga.sms if she wants to.

So, things you can do include:

hand petting of the man by the woman – what's often called a hand job
hand petting of the woman by the man – using his fingers to stimulate her cl.itoris. But he should not put his fingers inside until she has had her postnatal examination and the doctor or midwife has said that everything has healed up. So, just stick to stroking and rubbing the outside of her s.ex organs. It's quite safe to pay plenty of attention to her clitor.is, which is well away from the area where stitches are put in
o.ral s.ex performed on the man by the woman. This type of fore.play – termed f.ellatio – often proves a great boon to a male who is desperate for s.exual release
mutual caressing of various other parts of each other's bodies.

Is there anything we should avoid?
Yes. Please heed this important warning. You'll note that in the section above we have not recommended o.ral s.ex performed by the man on the woman (ie 'going down' on her).

This activity – often termed cunnil.ingus – is definitely off limits during the first few of months after childbirth.

Why? For two reasons.

It could introduce infection into the va.gina and womb.
Even more seriously, it has occasionally led to death. These tragedies have occurred because the man has (often accidentally) managed to blow air into the v.agina. Air can very easily get into the blood vessels of the newly-delivered womb – and cause an often fatal illness called 'air embolism'. Not long ago, the British newspapers reported an appalling case in which a man forced his wife into cunn.ilingus shortly after she came home from hospital, puffed air into her – and killed her.

Your br.easts after childbirth?
Is it all right for the partner to handle the new mother's brea.sts? Yes, it's OK – provided the woman feels happy about it. But don't go in for 'boob play' if she develops any kind of b.reast disorder, such as a nipple crack or an abscess.

Caressing your brea.sts may well make you produce jets of milk. O.rgasm may have the same effect. This is OK if the two of you don't mind it.

But if you find it off-putting, it would be a good idea to feed your baby before having s.ex, in order to empty the br.easts as far as possible.

On a related topic, the last few years have seen an increasing number of internet blogs from women who are embarrassed or ashamed because they find themselves having org.asms while bre.astfeeding.

But this is actually nothing to feel guilty about. It doesn't mean that you have perverted s.ex feelings for your baby or anything like that.

It's simply an effect of the powerful hormones that are released after childbirth and during lactation. In particular, one called oxytocin is said to have an orgasm-inducing action.

Do feelings for the new baby affect your se.x life?
Absolutely! You'll find that a great deal of time has to be spent taking care of the new baby.

Most new mothers – and plenty of new fathers too – feel exhausted because they are never able to get sufficient sleep. This may go on for months – or even a couple of years.

During this time, a man can feel as if his partner is pushing him away. He may think that she is lavishing all her attention on the baby and this may make him feel jealous, or left out.

After watching a partner go through pregnancy and birth, some men gain a new respect for the female body. These guys find it easier to articulate the emotions they feel about the new phase of their relationship and become more considerate of their partner's changing needs.

But a few men who have been at the birth of their child are quite distressed by what they have seen.

Indeed, some of them feel so guilty at the pain their partner has gone through that they are unable to even consider the idea of making love with her again. This is usually just a passing phase, but not always. And such a man should seek help from a counsellor to discuss his feelings.

To create and maintain a good atmosphere in the home, your relationship has to be one of trust and mutual respect. Both partners need to try to understand the other's point of view.

It's vital at this time that the couple can still do things together without the baby being involved so that they can enjoy the feelings they had for each other before they became parents.

We do urge new parents to take advantage of any offers of babysitting that come their way from fond grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends so they can go out together – or even just retire to bed for a sleep and perhaps a spot of s.ex!

What happens to the female s.ex drive after birth?
Most women (though there are exceptions) don't feel very keen on s.ex for at least a few weeks after childbirth, and the main reason for this is simply exhaustion.

If the delivery was long or difficult, the woman may also feel anxious about getting pregnant again.

Generally, women start getting their desire back within a couple of months of having a baby.

If your libido doesn't return, you should seek help from a doctor.

Female medics at family planning clinics are pretty hard-pressed, but are also understanding – and may have time to help you deal with this problem.

What do you do when you want to resume sexu.al inte.rcourse after the birth of your child?
When you're both ready to have intercourse after the birth, you should begin gently, especially if you’ve had stitches.

If possible, try and find a time of the day when you are not too worn out.

Also, try to find a time when the baby is not likely to wake up – so you can have some peace and quiet.

Hormone changes and worry can lead to some women experiencing vagi.nal dryness for the first three months after giving birth. But you don't take hormones for this. Instead, buy lubricants over the counter from a pharmacist such as K-Y Jelly or Liquid Silk.

For the first few s.ex sessions after childbirth, it's a good idea to choose a position in which the woman can control the pace and depth of penetration. A position with her on top, or one where both partners lie side-by-side facing each other, may be more comfortable.

If you’ve had a Caesarean, your scar may still be tender. So an orthodox ‘missionary’ position may not be a good idea. Try doing it with your man behind you!

Note to male partners: be gentle and be patient. Don't try and force your way in – and do not pressure your spouse into having s.ex before she is ready!

Don't forget contraception. It's very easy to become pregnant again – far sooner than you intended. Try and decide on some form of family planning by the time your baby is four weeks old. If in doubt, ask the doctor at your postnatal examination about contraception.

What do you do if the woman doesn’t regain her interest in s.ex?
This is quite common. Please bear in mind that it could be a symptom of postnatal depression (PND). If the woman is at all depressed, she should see her GP.

Otherwise, the best thing is for the couple to get some counselling from an expert in s.exual problems, for instance at:

With commonsense advice, a loving couple can usually gets things sorted out – though it may take some months.

In the last few years, there has been much publicity about possible hormone treatments which are supposed to increase female s.exual desire. As of 2014, I’m afraid that absolutely nothing has been discovered which will genuinely do this.

Unfortunately, Viagra and similar drugs have not so far been shown to help new mothers who are having difficulties with s.ex.

ideee03:
Hahaha,bia u no understand say she dey dodge u?

what is funy dear,hav u found out too?
y she go dey dodge me na,i nid to be clarify..
dosht

ideee03:
Someone's been busted.LOL

how u mean

MrsAwesome:
Honestly!!!!??
This is wrong by all ramification personally ......honestly!!!! Couples shouldn't even have a say on this issue if this is how they go about it, any thing less than six weeks is incorrigible, irresponsible and...and ....oh God. I mean the risk is high please....puerperal sepsis, postpartum haemorrhage are the major complications. The bruises on the uterus and vaginaaa are yet to healed ..which can trap microbes and even cause reactionary bleeding etc. Then comes the exposed nerve endings that causes pain or unpleasant sensation on walking or urination etc. Most women won't even allow you to examine them during postpartum visit at 6 weeks because they still feel sensitive down there. What about the lochia...the drains from the vaginaaa after birth that last up to 28 days or more, full of debris and all Whatnots... jeezzzzz.

Men please zip the fuccck up until your wife heals, the risk is greater than the enjoyment therein. Any man that has to be kept by all possible means including this is............yawn!!!!! Damn!!!!

It takes at least six weeks for things to go back to normal, if there is no associated problems postpartum.

Thank you jare. They think once you stop bleeding you start f+++ing.

I couldnt even shit after 2 weeks and someone will willing open her legs, no fear of infection.

E no kuku concern me, the world is overpopulated as it is a few more deaths will help us sef.

Belle don enter oh again
My boy na just six months oh