Now you guys really need to help me out.

I met a girl and I liked her and I asked her out. Though she didn't say yes first instance, I wouldn't want her to say yes just the first day of talking to her. I expected her to think about it, since relationship starts from friendship (I guess u guys know that).

But the stuff that baffles me is that after 3 weeks of meeting her, I taught she had agreed, because of the way she behaves to me (very romantic). She went as far as telling her siblings that she found a new lover; some stuff like that. After 1 month of meeting her, I knew everybody at home including her mum and her sisters and the rest of them. They like me so much -

Whenever I'm off to their house, i hop into a Fast Food Eatry (Mr. BIGGS) and buy Bread and some food stuff . But something happened and she was so mad at me - because I was proud of her I told my close friend about her and some of my friends, so she was mad because I told them about her. Since then she has been mad at me.

I met her in a Youth Forum - strictly for youths, different kind of youths coming together and sharing their ideas and potencials. So when ever my friend asks her about me, she claims she is not dating me. She tells them lies, as far as telling my other friends that i'm just a toaster.

I have notice that she is not straight foward - she beats around the bush, and she lies. But that don't stop me from dating her: I love her, I want to make her leave all those bad stuff. Friends who talked with her on mybehalf of me told me she said she is not dating me, that infact I was th only one caring to her, but she hasn't said yes. yet

The Questions is since she didn't say yes, why the hell she accept things I do buy 4 her? It got to a day she said she loves me on the fone, but now she is claiming that she hasn't say yes yet. I don't know what to do.

I want to give her a break for a while. Is that good or what do you think? Whenever she sees me with another lady she get jealous. [Help me, please]

From wat i was able to gather, me thinks she's after your dough and i think u should leave her alone.

You see Smartsoft, i think the gurl is trying to be hard to get, its not like she doesnt like you, if actually she told her siblings that she found a new lover thats a kind of feeling that she likes you . But i have to blame you for somethin, since she didnt tell you yes in your face, why go about to say she is yours, you gat to be sure sh is yours before bragging to your friends about her. some gurls hate such, it really annoys them. And the fact she is jealous whenever she sees you with someone else says alot.

Guy , take your game easy, slow the pace down , dont get excited like a 15 yr old who just had his first gurlfriend, chill , things would work out fine.

Been there, done that....

It happens to us. I experienced such sometime ago. She actually said she loved me on phone and turned back to deny it. I talked wit her and she said she was scared of a commitment then.....she was kind of young (17+) and i understood.
I think your girl is scared of a commitment. She doesnt look like a playa to me. But dont you make same mistake lots of guyz make..dont assume a relationship. Its got to be verbal. If she scared to say she loves you..she probably doesnt.

I'll advise u give her time. I believe if she just wanted to play you..she wont tell her folks about you not to talk of allowin u in her home.
Talk to her. If it doesnt work out. Give her some space. if she likes u..she'll come after you.

Nb: It's not wrong givin/spendin for your girl. Its the proof of Love. Just pray for wisdom so you'll know the one who really deserves it.

Also lets know your age (both of u).....a better advise could be generated based on that.

Aw.. This is the case of a typical girl... a girl that's scared of commitment. My words for you are that: She likes you,, but i think you should give her a break. Don't tell your friends too much about her, esp. when she ain't told you yes. Yes to marriage or relationship? Anyways whichever way... She needs a break. A break dont mean you shouldnt call her sometime.. and still be nice..

She's jealous when she sees you with other girls? Hello.. she likes you.

NNA MEN!!


i wish i could be the refree but in this kind of situation NA you be the ref oooo. just put your hand in ur back pocket and fling out the RED CARD and make sure you find someone to make her jealous immediately as in someone she go dey see you with so she can know you are not that kind of a maga.

omo u be man oooo no make one girl dey drive you. you are the man and chick, girls even mothers will stilll run after you,just cool down.

Smartsoft all successful relationships are about 'give and take'. You have a 'give and take' problem, either you are failing to give her what she wants thus her behaviour (towards you), or she dint really want you. I suggest you openly discuss with her the parameters of your relationship, if you cant get her to talk or you dint like what she says, you have a crisis. Else all will be well.
Of course you are a youth, so like most other youths good advice will always fly right past you till 'man-up' and learn these things by yourself.
wish you well.

Hi smart soft i understand you and i guess you should follow my advice because im a female and should know better
@ Casper i really think trying to make her jealous is the height of immaturity. i would be real pissed if a guy tries that line on me.
@smart soft give her more time. from what you said i can tell she likes you for her to be introducing you to her family and stuffs. What in God's name do you mean by if dint say yes why should she collect the stuffs i buy for her? do you mean you can't buy anything for a friend. My boyfriend asked me out for 7 months before i said yes. within that 7 months he bought me Vals and birthday gifts. We went out to eatries on more than 4 occassions so i think bread or whatever you are buying is not a big deal. It dint mean i was using him or his money because today, i buy vals and birthday gifts and i pay for some of our outing i even buy him recharge cards sometimes when he is down.
Also why should you tell people you are going out when she hasnt said yes. it means you are taking her answer for granted because you bought bread and the likes. i can't take that fom any guy. infact that alone can make me say no when i meant to say yes
My advice is that you don't pressure her to say yes or anything. Be subtle and build a friendship that would be worth continuing even if she doesnt agree to a relationship. and please feel free to spend for the girl you like it doent make you less of a man. i dint say you should become mumu or anything.

hmmm
@smart soft.

take it easy on her,remember slow n steady wins the race.

na small small,rushin her the way u did is ain't the best option,huhh

give her a break for a very lonnnnnnnnnnng while.means dont date her.hehe.

on a serious note i think u shld both sit down and talk about how u both feel, communication helps to solve problems. the fact that u buy her things does not mean u guys are dating. ~Buying things cld mean u being nice.
how are u sure that u love her, u barely know her.

hmmmmmmmmm
word of wisdom uch.... is right. listen to her

@ twinkle
Which Uche so that the enquirer doesnt get confused

@uchetobi ma, thanks alot ma.. well saw what u ask me to do.. though i'm gonna see her today at the Youth Forum. i belive that relationship is about Marturity, and
@ twinkledew, buying her things is notting to me.. i don't really find it difficult buying her things. but at least that long suspense is something else.
@ hot-angel Thnks baibe.
@layi she is 21yrs old of age. and i'm just 22
@nddy Well.. i was actually proud of her u know just can't help it so i decide to tell my friend..
@Scorpio :- Are you sure ??


Well you guys have spoken, i'm gonna see her in Youth Froum today. Anything we further dicuss will get back to you all.. Thks 4 the post.

its a guy's thing i know but gurls sometymes dont fancy it

Yeah. but............. is becoming boring

Hummm @nddy :- Thanks for that sha..
@drbigdaddyg :- What is becoming boring ??

@ Smart. You are welcome.

drbigdaddyg:

Yeah. but............. is becoming boring

Dogg you lack words

Is like u guys  know I'm lacking serious words (L  O  L)

well,4 me;4 her 2 introduce u 2 d mum dat means she wants 2 b serious with u.
4 her 2 tel her friends ur a toaster,she kinda ashamed of ya or she wants 2 pull hard chick infront of d friends.
4 her 2 tel u lies she has some skeleton in her cupboard,she's not used 2 commitment but ma dear u can change her if u find out is true love cos i cant tel if its real cos i dnt know her personality.goodluck!

Hey thanks but we've Ended the relationship. but we still friends, Though

funny to me.

oh.... anyhow.. im sure you guys will be able to work out something later

i have did that for someone,the question i'll like to ask is how old is she?may be she's not mature enough or she's just playing hard to get,is either you give her time if you still love her or you discard her.

Hmm, what is a 'toaster'? Toaster for bread? What?

Anyways, In my opinion, you should forget about her. She's not worth your attention or your time. She's using you for your money.

EDIT// Good thing the relationship is over!

she never want you,she only want your money and i think she;s ok with what she has got from you.so is better you forget about her and look for someone good.

u 'll know when a gurlk is faking , big boiz feel ;///

the igbos have a proverb that says,'if you want a child to insult u, tell her you'll marry her:' if she is under-20,then maybe that is the case here. moreover some girls are naturaly shy and love privacy,especially at the beginning stages. just apologise to her incase you infringed on her privacy law,and then give her time to become more relaxed about u.good luck.

ok first of all, i can kind of understand why she's denying u. In that kind of youth forum you're discussing, there's always a lot of talk (i.e. gossip) and I personally hate to be the subject of talk and idle tongues. However, she is wrong to deny you just because of that.

If i were you, I'd back off a little and just tell her what you want from her and ask her what she wants from you. If the 2 of you are not on the same page then it might be time to move on.

This is just by the way sha since you guys have already ended things.

Duh, don't you peeps ever look at the date before offering advice

The topic was created in 2005, geez about 3years ago.

Just take your time, stop the calling, stop to text her too. make sure she don't see you around. then she will now send her folks to call you and ask you to come over. tell them you are busy and wait for her next move. na babe now, you no go rush

u've f**ked up from d start. . . . . . .buyin things 4 her. how sure r u d@ she isn't after ur goodies?